The Naked Skydiver: Viking P.I., #6

By Tommy Ueland

When the owner of the local airstrip rings up the Viking P.I. about a bizarre discovery—a naked corpse sprawled out on the runway—he knows this case will be anything but ordinary. To add to the intrigue? The detective in charge of the investigation is none other than Alvilde, the P.I.'s own girlfriend.

 

Journey alongside our quirky detective as he navigates awkward dinner conversations, hunts criminals with a drone, endures blistering heat, reminisces with buddies at the fire station, and takes to the skies in a Cessna for the very first time.

 

Can the "Viking" P.I. solve the riddle without ruffling too many feathers? Or will this case come crashing down, much like the skydiver?

• Language: English
• Publisher: Tommy Ueland
• Release date: Oct 31, 2023
• ISBN: 9798223484882

Book preview

1

When I received the call, I was lounging on the couch in my favorite boxers and T-shirt, munching on cheese doodles and lazily glaring at the news, the same news that had been airing all week.

Six days earlier, a body had appeared mysteriously on the runway at a small local airfield, only two miles from my house. The airfield was mostly used by hobbyists: model airplane enthusiasts, skydivers, and budding drone pilots like myself.

I had recently committed to an expensive and spontaneous drone purchase after binging a program about drones. I had already crashed it five times paying double the amount of what it had cost me on repairs, but I was slowly getting the hang of it, that was, until they closed the airfield when the body was found lying spread-eagle in the middle of the runway. In a way, the timing was perfect, because the scorching heat made it unbearable to be outside most of the day.

The fact that someone had died at the airfield wasn’t as uncommon as one would think. In the last six years, two people had died, four had been injured, and one had been stuck in a tree twenty feet above the ground for hours until he was found, dehydrated. However, the unidentified person found on the runway was completely nude, in the position of Leonardo Da Vinci’s Vitruvian Man. That was a first.

There were as many theories about how it had happened as there were news providers: from a naked skydiver stunt gone wrong, to the victim being dumped from a plane at 30,000 feet, or that he was a drug courier. Some of the more alternative journalists had gone the abducted-by-aliens route or that the body was brought there by a tornado (something that doesn’t happen in Norway).

The police’s working hypothesis was that the body was deliberately arranged that way, and I knew this because I was sleeping with the detective in charge.

Yes? I answered lazily.

Am I talking to the Viking P.I.? a man asked.

I sat up and leaned towards the TV as they showed the poorly censored helicopter photos of the naked man lying on the tarmac.

Yeah, I said, making the one-syllable-dialogue-club proud.

My name is Thor Solberg, and I am the owner of Jarlsberg Airfield, he said in a matter-of-factly tone.

I choked on my cheese doodle and started coughing. That was the airfield I was looking at on the TV. Uh, OK?

I guess you’ve heard about the incident last week?

Yes, I said, my mind racing.

Because of the ongoing investigation, we can’t open the airfield. This is a problem since we are arranging the biggest skydiving event ever held in Norway in less than two weeks. The police seem to be going in circles, and we need your help to expedite the process.

I could feel the hairs on my arms standing on end. I had been following the case closely, daydreaming about being able to investigate it. But Alvilde and I had an agreement that we wouldn’t take a dump in each other’s nests, and she would never forgive me if I lay a big one in hers, even though, technically and legally, there wasn’t anything wrong with me investigating it. Practically, though, she decided just about everything in my life.

I’m sorry, but I don’t want to hinder the police’s investigations and destroy my good relationship with them, I said. I wasn’t lying, but I didn’t tell him the relationship was all but platonic either.

I could hear Thor’s barely audible sigh. I understand. Can you recommend anyone else?

On the TV, the news had been taken over by Norway’s most popular TV-show, Lars on Track, where people got help to track down long-lost family members. The show has been responsible for shedding many tears over the last twenty years. Right then, I heard the host saying in a dramatic fashion that the brothers featured on the show had