Timber: Emerald Isle MC, #3

By Courtney Lynn Rose

Even if she never remembers us, I'll never stop loving her.

 

Dermot "Timber" O'Shea
Caelan Finnigan is mine.

Just because she's technically a clubwhore and I haven't claimed her as my ol' lady doesn't change a thing. She's been mine since she was twenty-three— she just didn't realize it.

Even though I swore I'd never take an ol' lady, things are changing. I'm changing. Watching my sister getting married, my older brother having a baby— I want all that. And I don't want it with anyone but Caelan.

It's taken me years to buck up the courage to tell her, and I do . . . at my sister's wedding. And then my past and actions as an Enforcer come back to bite me in the ass, taking away the only thing that means a damn— her.

One gunshot changes everything.

Just because they didn't kill Caelan doesn't mean they didn't take her from me. After waking from a coma, she has no idea who she is . . . she doesn't know who I am. She remembers nothing about us. Not my love for her, not our history, not how tightly she holds my soul in the palm of her hand.

I'm going to find the shooter, and then I'm going to bathe in their blood . . . but all that won't ensure that Caelan ends up mine. No. Now, I also have to make her fall in love with me all over again.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Croí na Tine Publishing
• Release date: Apr 3, 2023
• ISBN: 9798215090282

Book preview

Content Warning

This book contains content, situations, and themes that may be sensitive for some readers. This may include but is not limited to sexual abuse/harassment/rape, graphic violence/gun violence/weapon violence, criminal activity/organized crime, strong/vulgar language, mental health disorders/side effects/therapies/recovery/treatment, physical/mental disabilities, sexual acts/encounters, mental/emotional/physical abuse/torture. Reader discretion is advised.

Chapter 1

Timber

Today might be the most stressful day the club has had in a long time, and it has nothing to do with club business.

Never in a million years did I think I’d get to watch my little sister get married, but today is that day. Standing in the groom’s suite with Shamrock, Claddagh, and Grey, it’s strange to see us all in tuxedos instead of our usual jeans. Shamrock has fidgeted with his tie half a dozen times in the last ten minutes, and I’m about ready to slap his damn hands if he doesn’t leave it the fuck alone.

Bro, you look fine. Stop fucking with your clothes, I say as I shrug on my jacket and button it.

The door to the suite opens, and Voltz sticks his head inside. We’re ready for you, Prez. Time to go wait at the altar for your woman.

Walking over, I stand behind Shamrock as he takes one last look in the full-length mirror. Putting my hand on his shoulder, I squeeze slightly. Listen, I know I haven’t said it, but I’m glad you and her get to be together. You better take care of her.

Turning to face me, his features stern, he nods. You know damn well I will, Dermot. She means the fucking world to me.

Smiling a little, I lightly slap his arm. I know. But if you don’t, I’ll kill you.

A round of laughter goes off behind us as Shamrock and I smile at each other before heading out of the room.

Shamrock takes his place in the hallway, and we line up in order behind him, joined by the bridesmaids. It’s me and Caelan, Claddagh and Kicker, Grey and Willow, and Carrigan will walk alone as the Maid of Honor. Dire is walking Faylinn down the aisle, and then he’ll stand as Shamrock’s Best Man.

Lining up, I hold my arm out and glance over just as Caelan slides her arm through mine. It’s the first time I’ve seen her in her dress, and my jaw drops a little. The music starts, and Shamrock walks into the chapel while I stare at my woman. Caelan may technically be a clubwhore who goes by the name Trinity, but she’s mine. She always has been. Watching Shamrock with Faylinn and then Carrigan with Dire, I’ve thought a lot over the last six months about making Caelan my ol’ lady.

I didn’t think I’d ever want to settle down. Losing my mom and Faylinn . . . it broke me for a long time. I didn’t want to love any woman because part of me was too damn afraid they’d be ripped out of my life, too. But looking at Caelan today, her hair pulled up with little wisps framing her face, her make-up light and perfect, and the white dress hugging her curves in all the right places, I know damn well I don’t ever want anyone but her. She’s it for me.

As we walk down the aisle, I lean closer to her. You look stunning, babe.

Caelan glances at me with a smirk. You don’t look so bad yourself.

Reaching the front of the church, I lean over and quickly kiss her cheek before we separate and take our places. When the harp and bagpipes start the wedding march, we all stand a little taller, and everyone stands as well and turns to face the back of the church. I can’t stop the smile from taking over my face as Dire and Faylinn walk down the aisle.

Faylinn has never looked so damn beautiful. She’s done her hair in one of those elaborate bun styles, and her veil is silver with bright emerald shamrocks adorning it. Caelan helped her design it, and I paid for it to be custom-made as a wedding gift. Her dress is white with lace shamrocks on the skirt as well.

When they get to the front, the priest clears his throat. Who stands to give this woman away?

As her brother, I do, Dire says before turning to Faylinn and lifting her veil back. Leaning forward, he kisses her on the cheek as Shamrock steps forward, and Dire places Faylinn’s hand in his and then comes to stand in front of me.

Shamrock and Faylinn turn and step so they are fully in front of the priest, and the attendees all sit.

We are gathered here today, in the presence of friends, family, and our Lord, Jesus Christ, to unite this man and this woman in holy matrimony. If anyone has any reason why these two should not be wed, speak now or forever hold your peace.

Ain’t no one saying a damn thing, Shamrock mutters under his breath, causing the priest and wedding party to snicker.

I steal a glance at Caelan, her eyes meeting mine, and she winks. It might be wrong, but I can’t wait to peel her out of that damn dress later.

The priest smiles and nods to Shamrock.

Clearing his throat, Shamrock takes a deep breath. I, Finn, take you, Faylinn, as my wife, for better or worse, richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, all the days of our life.

A single tear falls down Faylinn’s cheek as she smiles at him before taking a deep breath. I, Faylinn, take you, Finn, as my husband, for better or worse, richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, all the days of our life.

Faylinn and Shamrock both turn, Faylinn getting Shamrock’s wedding ring from Carrigan and Shamrock getting hers from Dire. Once they’ve slipped the rings on each other's fingers, the priest barely announces them as husband and wife before Shamrock pulls her to him and kisses her like his life depends on it. The cheers from the club and guests are deafening. Once everyone quiets a little, they turn toward me, and I step forward.

May the road rise to meet you. May the wind be always at your back. May the sun shine warm upon your face. May the rains fall soft upon your fields. May the light of friendship guide your paths together. May the laughter of children grace the halls of your home. May the joy of living for each other rip a smile from your lips, a twinkle from your eye. And when eternity beckons, at the end of a life heaped high with love, may the good Lord embrace you with the arms that have nurtured you the whole length of your joy-filled days. May the gracious God hold you both in the palms of His hands. And, today, may the Spirit of Love find a dwelling place in your hearts.

As the guests cheer and clap again, I look over to Caelan, taking in the huge smile on her face. As Shamrock and Faylinn take their first steps back down the aisle, a resounding boom echoes throughout the chapel . . .

And then the screams start.

Chapter 2

Timber

The screams don’t register in my head for more than a minute before I look over, and my whole world stops. Caelan is lying on the ground, limbs haphazardly around her, her head in Carrigan’s lap, blood pouring from the side of it.

Caelan, I scream as I run and drop to my knees, pulling my woman out of Carrigan’s lap and into mine. Baby, come on. Don’t do this.

Shamrock and Faylinn come over and kneel on the other side of Caelan.

I need an ambulance at Saint Patrick’s Cathedral, he says quickly into his phone. His words echo around me, and it’s only then I realize the screaming has stopped. Faylinn is leaning forward with a cloth in her hand, holding it to the gunshot wound on the side of my woman’s head, and all I can do is hold her against me.

Putting my lips next to her temple, I kiss the side of her head. Help is on the way, baby. Just hold on. I need you, Caelan, so don’t you give up.

A cold hand touches the back of my neck, and I look into my sister’s tear-filled eyes. She’s gonna be okay, Dermot. Just hold on to her.

The tear that slips down my cheek doesn’t even bother me, but the thousand things I should’ve done differently with this beautiful woman run through my head with the force of a tsunami. We’ve known each other all our lives, and I’ve loved her for years, but I’ve never uttered those words to her. I should have. Every fucking chance I had from the moment I knew I felt that way about her, I should’ve told her. Now, she’s bleeding out, and I realize I may never get the chance to.

Caelan, I say, kissing the side of her head again, I love you, baby. Please hold on, and I swear, I’ll spend the rest of my life showing you just how much I need you.

Timber, Shamrock says sternly, paramedics are here.

As I look down the aisle, four paramedics run up with emergency bags and a stretcher. Sir, we need you to let us get to her.

Reluctantly, I let them take Caelan and stand to move out of the way. As they work to get her on the stretcher and stabilized, the club surrounds me. The tension is thick enough to cut with a knife, but I can’t take my eyes off the blood-soaked woman fighting for her life as the paramedics finally lift the stretcher and hurry her to the ambulance.

I’ll meet you all at the hospital, I say without looking at anyone before I push through my brothers and run out to my bike. The ambulance doesn’t keep too much of a lead on me as I follow it at full speed to the hospital. When it goes left to the emergency loading, I go right for emergency parking. Just as I hit the front door, a rumble of more bikes vibrates in the air, and I know my family isn’t far behind me.

Stepping up to the desk, I clear my throat. The nurse looks up, and her eyes go wide with panic. Sir, are you okay?

It’s only then I look down and realize my suit is covered in blood. Yes, ma’am. I’m here for Caelan Finnigan. She’s a GSW to the head, brought in by ambulance.

Nodding, she types on her keyboard, her eyes rapidly scanning the screen. If you’ll head to the private waiting room, she’s being rushed to surgery now. The surgeon will come speak to you as soon as he can.

Sighing, I turn around just as Medic comes barreling through the door. He doesn’t even stop to speak to me. Instead, he heads right to the door leading to the back and swipes his badge, disappearing into the hall. No doubt he’s going to barge in on Caelan’s surgery. I’m thankful for that man. While Medic tries to save everyone he treats, I know for him there’s more on the line when it’s one of our own.

The rest of the club comes in a moment later, and I motion for them to follow me. Once we’re inside the waiting room, I turn to face the club. Someone better find out what the fuck happened.

Calm down, brother, Grey says, coming over to put his hand on my shoulder. Voltz, Ironhide, and Asteroid are still at the church trying to figure shit out. They’ll let us know when they have something solid.

I don’t want something solid, I growl, clenching my fists. I want whoever shot my woman and their head on a fucking platter.

Shamrock steps forward with Faylinn next to him. Dermot, we’ll find who did this, and we’ll take care of them, but right now, Caelan needs you here and level-headed. Let the brothers do the work outside the hospital.

Nodding, my eyes roam to my sister, my heart breaking further as I take in the bloodstains that mar her wedding dress. Reaching out, I pull her to me and wrap my arms around her. She tucks her head into my chest, I tuck mine into her neck, and we both just stand there for a while. After a few minutes, a small hand touches my shoulder, and Faylinn and I pull apart to find Willow standing next to us with tears in her eyes.

Letting go of my sister, I pull Willow in for a hug as well. She and Caelan have been best friends since the day Willow joined the club. They share a room and go pretty much everywhere together. They’re two of the closest people aside from Faylinn and Carrigan. I know the pain I’m feeling is the same Willow is trying to keep under control.

She’s going to be okay, babe. I know she is, I whisper before looking back into Willow’s eyes.

She sniffles and wipes her tears. I know she will. She’s stronger than anyone gives her credit for.

Grey comes up behind Willow and slides his arms around her waist, kissing the side of her head. She’s a bad bitch. She’ll pull through this. We just have to have faith in her.

Shamrock gives orders to most of the guys, and many of the brothers leave to do as they’re told. After half an hour, it’s just the central family in the waiting room— Shamrock, Claddagh, Dire, Grey, Faylinn, Carrigan, Willow, Kicker, and me, all sitting around silently, the clock on the wall ticking like a bomb.

At this point, all I can do is sit with my head in my hands and quietly pray because the thought of losing Caelan is killing me.

Chapter 3

Timber

It’s been nine fucking hours, and we still haven’t heard a word other than Caelan is still in surgery.

Shamrock is sitting on one of the benches, Faylinn curled up asleep with her head in his lap. Grey and Willow sit on the floor with their backs against the wall, each with a magazine. Claddagh is napping in a chair. I sent Dire and Carrigan home to their son a few hours ago. I told Dire I’d text him as soon as we heard something. Kicker is asleep on one of the other benches.

And I’m sitting here, staring at the door that leads back into the hospital, jumping every time it opens.

I glance at the clock— three in the morning— and then back at the door. Through the little square windows, Medic’s face gets closer, and I quickly shove out of my chair and yell for Shamrock. My stomach drops when the doors open, and I take in Medic’s scrubs covered in blood. All the blood drains from my face, and I brace myself for whatever news he has.

Sighing, he comes over and runs his hand through his hair. She’s out of surgery and still listed in critical condition. We removed the bullet, and I sent a picture to Voltz to see if he can trace it.

Is she going to make it? I say, swallowing the lump in my throat.

Medic sighs again. "I don’t know, brother. We stopped the bleeding in her brain, and we’re keeping her in a coma for now so she can heal without stress. But honestly, we don’t know what damage this can do in the long term. There’s a lot that can happen while she’s healing and even after she wakes up. So, we won’t know until it actually happens. But she’s got