She Who Earned Her Wings: Stars, Hearts, and Dreams, #1

By Vaela Denarr and Micah Iannandrea

One does not learn to fly without taking a leap. And one has to fall to be caught.

 

Nomi is a young druid finally taking the chance to spread her wings and leave her home. To see the world and discover its magic, beauty… and maybe love. Calia is a dragon on the hunt for angels, trying to square an old debt. That, and to get Laura, her desired bondmate, to finally return to her side, where she belongs.

 

Nomi immediately catches the eye of the powerful dragons. Calia entices her with honeyed words and a skillful tongue. On the other hand, Laura, much smaller but equally intimidating, takes it upon herself to protect her.

 

Despite the warnings, Nomi can't help being drawn to Calia's charm, her power, her fangs… and the hidden gentleness in her eyes. She promises danger where Laura promises safety, and Nomi is torn between the two. Luckily there is a convenient cult out for the dragons' heads, providing Nomi with ample distraction and at least one dragon egg to steal, hatch, and raise by herself. Perfectly normal things for a young transgender druid to get involved in!

In the clutches of dragons, battling dark forces from beyond the stars, Nomi faces the questions of who she is and who she wants to be. Whether she deserves the love offered to her, and what it truly takes to earn her wings...

• Language: English
• Publisher: Vaela & Micah Books
• Release date: Mar 31, 2023
• ISBN: 9781778231872

Vaela Denarr

Vaela is a nonbinary, transfemme polyamorous lesbian working as the primary writer in her partnership with Micah Iannandrea. They write full time in order to someday be able to move to their datemate and build a queer bookfort with them. Her writing usually focuses on sapphic, nonbinary, trans or genderqueer characters, and portraying different relationships of love (familial, platonic, romantic or physical).

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Also by

Crimson Tears

The Gift of Blood

The Thrill of the Hunt (TBR)

Stars, Hearts and Dreams

She Who Brought the Storm (Prelude)

Standalones

Moonlight Love and Witchcraft (CT)

Copyright © 2023 by Vaela Denarr & Micah Iannandrea

All rights reserved.

No portion of this book may be reproduced in any form without written permission from the publisher or author, except as permitted by U.S., Canadian and European copyright law.

No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, scanning, or otherwise without written permission from the publisher. It is illegal to copy this book, post it to a website, or distribute it by any other means without permission.

This novel is entirely a work of fiction. The names, characters and incidents portrayed in it are the work of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or localities is entirely coincidental.

Vaela Denarr (She/They) & Micah Iannandrea (They/Them) asserts the moral right to be identified as the author of this work.

First edition

Cover art by Mura @murasaki_yuri

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Contents

About this Book

Content Notes

Dedication

Act 1

1.Chapter 1

1. The Adventure Begins

2.Chapter 2

2. A Garden of Crystal

3.Chapter 3

3. The Poisoned Forest

4.Chapter 4

4. A Shrieking Corpse

5.Chapter 5

5. Blooming Ash

6.Chapter 6

6. Warmth and Generosity

7.Chapter 7

7. Pulling at the Stars

8.Chapter 8

8. A Dragon’s Gentle Warmth

Act 2

9.Chapter 9

9. A Hunter in the Night

10.Chapter 10

10. A Lifetime of her Experiences, Echoed in just a few Words

11.Chapter 11

11. Burn, or tame the Fire

12.Chapter 12

12. The Druids of Dragonblood

13.Chapter 13

13. Incapable of having Fun

14.Chapter 14

14. Fire in her Blood

15.Chapter 15

15. The Nightmare and the Light

Act 3

16.Chapter 16

16. The Slayer

17.Chapter 17

17. Periods and Problems

18.Chapter 18

18. How to Date a Dragon

19.Chapter 19

19. A Bad Influence

20.Chapter 20

20. This is Not a Date

21.Chapter 21

21. Scalebreaker

22.Chapter 22

22. Pay for it in Blood

Act 4

23.Chapter 23

23. A Place of Lonely Death

24.Chapter 24

24. Bones of Steel, Flesh Undying

25.Chapter 25

25. The Dragon’s Treasures

26.Chapter 26

26. Rotten to the Core

27.Chapter 27

27. Adorable and Deadly

28.Chapter 28

28. Waiting for the Bite

29.Chapter 29

29. Shepherd’s Daughter

30.Chapter 30

30. Defying all the Odds

31.Chapter 31

31. Language is Fake

Act 5

32.Chapter 32

32. Quiet and Unseen

33.Chapter 33

33. More Pain than a Heart can Hold

34.Chapter 34

34. Fire of the Dead

35.Chapter 35

35. The Creeping Dark

36.Chapter 36

36. No Stars in the Sky

37.Chapter 37

37. Trapped and Alone

38.Chapter 38

38. A Dagger to their Hearts

39.Chapter 39

39. Wrath

40.Chapter 40

40. An End and a Beginning

41.Epilogue

Afterword

Acknowledgments

About Author

About this Book

Welcome to Astraea, a world of fantasy, queerness, and some really messy dragons. Thank you for giving it a look!

At first glance, STARS, HEARTS AND DREAMS may seem like classic or epic fantasy, but it differs from those. Welcome to a future fantasy world that retains familiar terms that didn’t exist in European medieval times. This has memes. This has the same dragons poetically waxing about being one or feasting on each other’s hunger, and then going Fuck my life. These dragons be unabashedly gay and terrible.

This book uses queer in a reclaimed way, and gay in a general I like people of the same gender way. This draws on our personal experience of queerness and the queer community surrounding us.

One of the characters is a transgender lesbian. Her experiences are directly inspired by the authors' own experiences with transness and gender non-conformity.

This book is the start of a series which will have some drama and relationship struggles, but the romance is endgame polyamory.

GENERAL:

This book is written in Canadian English with the use of both the metric and imperial measuring systems.

Please respect the character’s genders and identities. These characters know exactly who they are. If they do transition throughout the story, that is planned, and we ask that you respect the character’s identity. (We had a whole talk about gender-bending trans characters. Please don’t do it.)

For the purpose of convenience, people of various genders in this book will be referred to as how they identify and with the pronouns they use, even if the POV character is unaware of them, unless obscuring their identity is integral to the plot. For people who use multiple sets of pronouns, those will be used in alternation depending on the user’s preference.

Witchcraft, magic, cultures and religious practices in this book/universe stem from the imagination of the authors and are not meant to be representative of/commentary on real world practices of cultures, witchcraft or any religions.

For those without the financial means to buy our books, we offer free copies in exchange for an honest review. Reviews are vital to an author's career, and thus to us being able to continue these stories. You can reach us via https://linktr.ee/VaelaAndMicah

These authors support trans rights as well as bodily autonomy. If you disagree with these stances, this book isn't for you, and the themes of love, acceptance, compassion and respect represented in much of our writing will most likely nauseate you. Please go read a different book.

Content Notes

Medium depiction of emotionally abusive relationship.

Violence and death (non-graphic)

Mentions and discussions of gender dysphoria

Mentions of physical assault

Discussions of trauma

Mentions of non-sexual kink as a tool for handling trauma

Non-graphic, magic-induced regurgitation

Pregnancy (Act 3, desired)

On-page sex, non-graphic

Very minor transphobia/misgendering in Act 5

Mentions of magic-induced psychological distress

Abduction

Mentions of slavery

Trauma-influenced miscommunication and heartbreak

Mention of adoption (Astraea is an idealized world where children are protected. We understand that the mention of adoption can still trigger the trauma our real-world adoption and foster system leaves on so many children)

At the start of this book, a character is in a relationship with a law enforcement member, This does not last. ACAB.

Dedication

This is a polyamorous romance full of magic, heart, and a little peril.

Conflicting desires may keep our characters apart, but they will eventually find each other,

on the road to a happily ever after.

For everyone who ever had trouble loving themself, to be open to themself and true to themself.

For everyone on a journey of self discovery. And for everyone who did not know they were on that journey until they found their own, unique path, filled with love, danger, dragons, and those whose journeys looked the same.

For those of us who feel like monsters.

And for my light and my heart, who guided me to safety.

Stories don’t just exist to show that dragons are real.

Stories exist to show that dragons are beautiful.

And dragons can be married.

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1

Chapter 1

The Adventure Begins

Nomi had not planned on becoming a wanted criminal immediately upon running away from home but sometimes these things just happened. She’d just wanted to learn magic and maybe kiss a girl. Earn her wings, as the druids said. Come into her own in skill and confidence! Not commit crime. But sometimes adventure and crime happened to overlap, so she didn’t think to panic about it as the sailors ran up the gangplank to grab her.

There would be time to panic about it later.

I’m really, really sorry! Nomi said quickly, backing away to the far end of the little merchant vessel she had stowed away on for the last day or two. She gripped the strap of her green and brown bag nervously at her chest as she bumped up against the railing, ocean grey and sun-dappled behind her. I don’t have any money, but I ate, like, seven mice? That helps, right? She gave them a winning smile.

Apparently eating the mice that had made it onto the ship was not deemed adequate compensation, because the sailors still advanced on her with nets and ropes. Nomi thought that was a little unnecessary. She didn’t look very threatening. Sure, she was a little tall at five-foot-ten, and she was thick in build, which made her look even bigger. The baggy poncho and pants also contributed to that, but she had braided her white hair so nicely as to look perfect and non-threatening upon her arrival.

Still, they came towards her with their nets and ropes, and she really didn’t want them to use those on her— well, maybe the big woman in the back, the one with the short brown hair and scar on her jaw. Her arms strained the sleeves of her shirt, and her lips, drawn into a line, looked so pretty and soft—

Not the time! she chided herself, feeling heat pool at her cheeks as she watched the sailor’s intense, dark eyes. Um… Um, bye! she said a little too panicked. She wove magic around herself with a thought and turned into a panther right before their eyes. The magic glimmered like half visible wings enveloping her, and then she was a panther with all the sharp senses and agility of one.

Remember what your mom always says! Nomi told herself as she dashed and slipped between the sailor’s legs who yelled about a mage on their ship. If you run away, you don’t have to explain why you were pretending to be a cat on their ship! It wasn’t that she had wanted to stow away, but she definitely hadn’t wanted to be seen! And it had seemed like such a good idea at the time!

Staying back on the island had just been too stifling. Sure, it was big, but everyone knew who she was. Everyone wanted something from her. And, really, all the cities were the same! Nomi wanted to see the world, learn more about magic, meet new people, maybe kiss a girl…

Not that that was important or anything, as she slipped between grasping hands and rushed down the gangplank, and right into a new adventure. Despite the shouts behind and around her, both from sailors and onlookers, she couldn’t help but feel incredibly excited. After hiding on the ship for a week, she had just been so excited to see the mainland. When they had docked, she just had to ask one of the sailors if this was Blackwater.

Being a cat, she hadn’t been able to make herself understood, so she had changed into human form. And that she had instantly regretted.

But now… Now her paws carried her over the saltwater-slicked planks of the pier and along the port, and she didn’t care where she was. Everything smelled and looked so different! Fishing boats were unloading their catches alongside merchant vessels. People and animals roamed the docks, touched and untouched ones.

There was a jenari, a woman with skin that shimmered and shifted like molten gold and black, marbled eyes with white veins. By her side was a fey-kin, but not one of the elves Nomi had come to know, with their colour-shifting bodies, sharp ears and cat claws. This one had claws too, but little scales on her hands. It was a warm summer morning, so her arms were exposed, showing patches of iridescent green feathers on her shoulders, same as around the eyes.

Nomi’s eyes were pulled to a person with shaved hair and the geometric pattern of a druid’s tattoo on their scalp, pulling down her neck. They calmed a horse as it was led up a gangplank onto a ship.

She looked around excitedly. There was so much to see, and her worries (the sailors) so far away. This was amazing! Though, in her excitement, she ran into a group of cats sitting before a fisher’s stall, watching for a way to get some food. They jumped up and hissed as the great, white panther with the red eyes and feathers along the cheeks and shoulders stumbled into their midst. Nomi tried to stop herself, and the cats vanished in a puff of mist that tasted like morning dew and made her sneeze.

She rubbed her snout with one big paw.

Well, well. Young druid. Not from around here, a voice crowed from one of the nearby fisherman stands. It took Nomi a moment to decipher it, since the speaker did not use words but rather druidic, which was more of a musical language. But that was what allowed the grey hawk sitting on the colourful tarp of this stand to make himself understood to Nomi at all.

Her eyes lit up at seeing the white symbol painted on its chest. Oh, hi! she said, eagerly jumping up and making sure she looked presentable. Her own gasp on druidic was… well, good enough. I’m Nomi! Are you one of the Ashbloom Druids?

Used to be, the hawk said back. Now I eat fish. He eyed the bucket of chum next to Nomi.

Nomi flicked her cat ears in a gentle frown. This druid didn’t seem to be all there. Maybe he’d been in his animal form for so long it had become a part of him. Some druids did that. Well… Can you tell me where I can find the other druids?

The hawk clicked his beak. Might be able to. If you help me first.

Sure! What do you need? Nomi liked helping people. When she was asked to, anyway. She liked it much less when her aid was assumed and expected.

Those mist cats were helping me. Food for all. The hawk tilted his head jerkily at her. You get me food. I tell you where the Ashbloom live, yeah?

Sounds good! Nomi dashed aways, behind a different fisherman’s stand. She was opposed to stealing, but the hawk had already been eyeing a bucket of chum. Nobody would miss that! Slowly, with her snow-white fur with the hexagon patterns contrasted against the bright colours of the fish market, she prowled closer. She could taste fish and blood in the air. She hunched low, her footfalls quiet, as she approached her target from behind, unseen, a shadow in the night (or a sunray in the day)— And then a brown cat appeared before her in a cloud of mist and hissed loudly.

Nomi yelped and jumped high in the air, startled by the sudden animal with its arched back and bristled fur. The sound came out as a hoarse snarl, attracting the attention of the bucket’s owner. He cast one glance at the white panther with the red eyes sneaking up on him and let out a cry of surprise. This, in turn, alerted two passing members of the city watch. At least that’s what Nomi assumed they were from their leather jackets and metal breastplates and the giant halberds they carried.

She quickly dashed right between the two as they levelled their weapons at her, called a quick Sorry! back that was just a rumbling meow, and ducked and weaved between the legs of city folk who jumped aside with surprised cries when they noticed her. The feathers around her jaw and neck bristled. Spooked by a tiny cat! How embarrassing!

A whistle rang behind her, high pitched and carrying over the rooftops. Another responded ahead of her, and then she shot past another group of two city watch people. This is just going terribly, she thought. First she’d turned into a human on the ship just because she’d been so excited to talk to someone. And now she was on the run from the law because she’d tried to steal a bucket of chum.

You, stop! a voice yelled from the crowd around Nomi, and gloved hands narrowly missed her. She slipped free, thoughts racing—

East, young one! a voice called from above in the melodic language of druids. East, past the city, past the ash belt! You’ll find the druids there!

Nomi glanced up, noticing the hawk following her. She meowed a quick, hoarse, Thank you!

Don’t cause any trouble!

I would never! she said earnestly and veered off into the crowd. They parted before her with more cries, and Nomi would have really felt bad about spooking them, but… despite everything, she was on the mainland. She was smelling things she’d never smelled before, seeing things she’d never seen. Accents and voices unknown to her tickled her ear. Even though she was on the run from the law, she couldn’t help but think that this was the start of a beautiful adventure.

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A blade flashed in the half dark. Flickering candlelight danced off the edge and Rhi narrowed their eyes into the dark, heart beating fast. They should have suspected when the shutters had been closed tight, should have known the attack was coming. But there had been no unease, because Rhi had always preferred the dark over the glare of sunlight. It had made them feel calm. Safe.

Safety had always been a strange thing for them. Most people felt safe behind thick walls with guards that watched for monsters and those choosing violence to guide their path. But not Rhi. No, Rhi had always felt safest far away from other people.

It wasn’t that they harboured mistrust for others. It was the very fabric of human society that made them feel like a stranger, unwelcome, unskilled, and uneducated in their ways. Not knowing and not being capable, those were things that frightened them more than a physical altercation.

The politics of smalltalk, handshakes, and a myriad of other rules that were considered polite and social eluded them. They didn’t like it, they didn’t like the expectation placed on them to go along with it, and they very much disliked the reaction they oftentimes got when they didn’t. Rhi much preferred to sit under a tree, birdwatching or sketching flowers onto the pages of their sketchbooks.

That’s why they had taken the ranger exam two years ago. It had been arduous. Learning how to survive in the wild had been a far cry from becoming used to it. But at least the written section of the test had been easy. The rangers were pragmatic people, and Rhi’s directness with them was appreciated. And now they got to wander the woods and write down what they’d seen, draw flowers and birds, far away from prying eyes and social structures that they did not care for. Child’s play for someone with sharp eyes and an overactive mind.

Those eyes now followed the shadow darting outside the candlelight. Gloved hands held a knife that glinted as it darted forward. With the speed and precision of a striking snake, it impacted Rhi’s rapier, offsetting the thrust. It was a simple weapon with a silver handguard styled like vines and floral engravings on the straight of the blade. A good weapon to stab with little effort, which suited their lean body.

Their opponent was fast. The shadow darted forward, but Rhi had already backed away. They had the advantage of reach. Their opponent knew it. Now that the element of surprise had been lost, they seemed to re-evaluate their position.

Rhi brushed their white hair back, out of their face. It almost hung into their eyes. Should’ve cut it. The thought nagged them. They’d just cleaned up their undercut the other day.

Sweat slicked their white locks. It wasn’t from exertion. The attack had come only moments ago. No, it was the stress of the sudden ambush. Rhi felt grey flowers wanting to bloom on their skin, tattoos forming like ink in water, but they clenched their jaw, focusing on the hot, prickling, tingling sensation of it. Like an itch willed away, and about as easily, they forced the Inking down. No need to tell the enemy how rattled they were. Rhi had known the attack would come, but still—

Their opponent grabbed the book off the coffee table with the candles and threw it. Rhi noticed the white glove dip into the candlelight. Almost by instinct, their wings appeared to shield them. Like a veil of rippling water being pulled away, the large, white feathers became corporeal. Rhi knocked the book aside, but in doing so the gust of wind blew out the singular candle on the table.

Everything was dark. Rhi was blind, if only for a moment. They filled their dark eyes with magic, covering them with an oilslick rainbow hue that rendered the dark meaningless and dunked the world in muted colours. But it was already too late. Something hit them in the chest, a foot behind their heel tripped them and they fell hard, losing the magic. They had the presence of mind to tuck their chin and prevent themself hitting their head on the wooden floorboards off the carpet. They tried to swipe their rapier and sit up, but a hand caught theirs and held it tight. A boot on their chest slammed them right back down on the ground.

For a moment, the world was quiet. Then a voice rang out from the dark. You’re gorgeous out of breath and flat on your back, it purred. Really suits you.

Rhi couldn’t help a bashful blush creeping onto their cheeks. Shut up. You cheated, they mumbled.

Laura, the Lady of Ash, their caretaker, owner and protector, chuckled. You’re the one who wanted a real fight, pet. A sliver of light from the door illuminated only her polished black boot still pressing down on Rhi’s chest as she leaned in. But eyes glowed in the dark, like coals of burning lavender. And what kind of mistress would I be to not fulfill your every wish?

Pink flowers Inked up Rhi’s back at her choice of words, and the glowing, bashful pink continued to creep up further until it covered their neck. An awful one, they whispered, helpless and in love, like you’re being right now. She’d said that to embarrass them. Because even after months of living like this, they still couldn’t quite believe it sometimes. They were Laura’s pet. It was an agreement they’d made months ago, and one that Rhi had been anxious about. But Laura, as was the norm for her and her people, took her responsibilities seriously. She helped them. Nurtured them. She provided food and shelter, all the books they could read, and even trained them in how to defend themself. And all Rhi had to do was let her be in charge and let her love them.

Easily done when they had long since developed feelings for this amazing, powerful woman who had shown them selfless kindness long before they’d become hers.

It’s not my fault you colour so beautifully, Laura said, leaning in a bit more. Light fell over her sharp jawline. Her full lips. The fangs flashing in the smile behind it.

Rhi grumbled and accepted their fate. So, how did I do? they asked to distract themself from the flurry of emotions in their gut. Their eyes had adjusted to the dark, and they watched Laura as she sheathed her knife at her belt.

Laura hummed. Much better than before, she said, smiling softly. Not as good as when you can see, and you need to keep your wings under control more. But you no longer freeze up when they come out. Rhi wasn’t sure that was accurate praise. Less than a dozen people knew about their wings, and less than a handful got to see them up close. Laura was one of those few. With her, Rhi wasn’t afraid to show their true self.

So… they whispered, still feeling her boot on their chest, you gonna get off me?

Laura rested her arm across her knee. The light caught the many tiny, white scars on her dark, walnut-wood skin rippling over toned muscles of her forearm. I don’t know, she mused. You usually like it when I step on you.

Rhi felt their cheeks turn darker, and they let out a flustered stammer. Laura laughed softly and took her foot off their chest. She did not let go of their hand and rapier as she kneeled next to them, but the grip that had formerly been tight was now tender.

I’m very proud of your improvement, she said, and Rhi felt more happy flowers blooming under their clothes, like living tattoos. So why did their chest still feel tight? Laura had been gentle. Had they fallen wrong…?

Rhi. Laura’s voice had grown soft. She took off the white glove and rested her hand on their cheek. Deep breaths. You’re okay. I’m here. Her skin was warm. Smooth in places, but marked by scars. Rhi gripped her hand tight. You’re safe. I won’t let anything hurt you.

I guess the ambush did rattle me, Rhi realized as they took a deep breath. They’d known that that could happen. That was why they asked Laura to train them like this. They needed to face that fear of sudden assault. Get used to it so they could beat it. Laura might not always be there to protect me.

Rhi. Laura’s eyes were hard and her expression stern now. Rhi could make her out much better. The strong, sharp jawline. The white scar on her right cheekbone. The black hair, tied back at the top and the rest falling to her shoulders in gentle waves. She brought their foreheads together and held them. "I’ll always be here to protect you, she said firmly. Until you no longer want me."

They would never not want her. Over the past months, their relationship had evolved. Deepened. For some reason, Laura, who could have anyone she desired, spent her time with them. Cared for them. Loved them. It was complicated, difficult to put into words, and more difficult to talk about with each other, but it was there. And they made it work.

Laura stood up and offered Rhi her hand, pulling them up when they took it. She was smaller than Rhi by four inches, about five-foot-two, but that didn’t stop Rhi from feeling like she was somehow… bigger. Filling much more space than she should. Like she was looking down on them, but not in a way that made them feel unloved.

They stood close to each other for a moment in the half dark. Laura’s fingers, marked with tiny scars, brushed over Rhi’s dress shirt and tugged it back into place properly. Rhi rested their head to hers and simply let it happen. Nobody else could touch them in this way without making them feel unsafe.

Well, maybe one person.

Thank you, Rhi whispered softly. For the help. Practicing, I mean.

Laura smiled softly. You don’t have to thank me for that, she said with a kiss to their forehead. She smoothed the sleeves over their arms with a featherlight touch, took their wrist, lifted it to press her lips to their fingers.

Rhi shook their head, resting a hand on Laura’s waist and feeling pink bloom on their neck at the shudder that ran through them. The audacity of them daring to touch Laura like this. To have her smile at them the way she did, showing that it was okay. Still, they said. Thank you.

Laura reached up a hand and ran her fingers so gently over their cheek, making the heat a thousand times worse. Always, love, she whispered. Then she pulled away, and her warmth left them as she touched the white crystal in the doorframe. Ever so gently, the light crystals in the little chandelier above them started to glow. It was a gentle, golden colour, just enough to not hurt Rhi’s eyes and get them used to the glare of the summer sun outside again.

I should get cleaned up, Rhi said and went to sheathe their rapier, having dropped the sheath at the beginning of the fight. They strapped on the heavy belt that came with it. Wearing it for long was uncomfortable to them, but they wanted to get at least a bit of a feel for it. Not that they expected having to use it on many occasions.

I’ll be in the kitchen. Laura stepped outside the room. Oh, by the way, I bought groceries while I was out, she added as she went into the other room, adjacent to this one, past a set of stairs that led to the bedroom.

Rhi huffed softly and ran a hand through their sweaty hair. You didn’t have to, they muttered as they followed her. They felt a little bad about Laura always watching out for every little thing with them, despite their arrangement.

Laura leaned back out of the kitchen door and gave them a flat look. Seeing as your icebox was empty when I got here, I really did. She smiled. Besides, I take care of you. Gotta make sure you have a balanced diet.

I—

"Bread and cheese for every meal is not a balanced diet. Her look turned stern, and Rhi shut their mouth. I know you have sensory issues with food, but we need to find something that works for you and keeps you healthy, she added softer. Would that be okay?"

Rhi sighed and rubbed their neck. Only for you, they said and, after her approving nod, went to the bathroom, where the light falling bright through the window made them squint. They put their back to the window, wings fading away into nothing, like ink in water as they touched a hand to the blue crystals ringing the stone wash basin. The wings were still there, but incorporeal and unseen.

Laura was strict about both their health and comfort, even when it took effort to balance both. They were still unsure what she saw in them. Rhi didn’t consider themself exceptionally pretty, though Laura called them handsome. Even as they glanced into the quickly filling water basin, they had to stop themself from nitpicking their appearance before dunking their head into it. Their face was narrow, with a sharp jaw. Eyes too dark and too restless.

Stop it. They lifted their head back out of the water and shook it, spraying droplets. Laura would be upset if she knew they were being self-deprecating.

They also did not think of themself as otherwise enticing, and avoided looking too much when they took off their shirt to wipe off the sweat with a damp cloth. But they were aware their own thoughts of their body were skewed by personal bias. Despite that, they’d come to accept Laura’s affection, for the most part, strange and impossible though it was.

Thinking of ill-fated romances that didn’t dare to be called such made Rhi think of the other person they liked. They and Laura both. They leaned on the basin and ran a hand through their hair. Then they put their shirt back on, grabbed a soft, cream towel, and went back to the kitchen. Hey, Laura… they said, drying their hair. Did you consider what we talked about? Regarding Calia?

Nope. Laura busied herself with properly sorting the groceries she’d just tossed in the wood and metal icebox earlier, which would keep them cool and preserved. She can come back when she apologizes.

Rhi frowned. She says the same about you, you know?

Laura aggressively shut the cooler door. "I am not the one hunting angels to keep them as… I dunno, exotic pets!"

Rhi, leaning against the door frame, raised an eyebrow at her and pointed at themself.

Exactly, we already have one! What does she need another one for?

Rhi clenched their jaw gently and looked aside. They could think of a few reasons why Calia might prefer anyone else over them. Their fingers played with the silver chain around their neck. Maybe she wants someone with fewer boundaries, they said and tried not to sound too sad about it. After all, Calia was everything they were not. Confident, strong, easily in the mood for a roll in the sheets… That came much more difficult for Rhi. Simply just feeling physical attraction to someone was an exceedingly rare occurrence from their point of view.

Don’t be silly, Laura said and stepped in front of them to take their hands. She’s just not telling us why. But I promise it’s not you.

I’d just… like to be closer again, Rhi muttered and squeezed Laura’s hands. We were all so happy together. What happened?

Laura’s gaze was gentle and soft. She opened her mouth to say something undoubtedly sweet and reassuring, but before she could, a hoarse roar from outside made them both pause. Laura blinked. Is that…?

Not any animal I’ve ever heard around here. Rhi ran to the window and threw it open. They leaned out to try and catch a glimpse of what was going on, and just barely caught sight of a bunch of city watch members running down one of the alleyways.

Rhi frowned. The watch is there. Chasing another druid, maybe?

I guess I should head out and check, Laura said. She nudged Rhi. Come on! Let’s go see what’s up! She hurried to the door and pulled on her knee-high boots, tucking the legs of her baggy grey pants into them.

Do I have to? Rhi complained but followed anyway. You know the watch hates me!

Laura smiled, slipping on a black ring with an iridescent rainbow stone over her white glove. She leaned up to them, her hand running to the back of their neck. They’re just jealous because I love you, she whispered, and in the kiss that followed Rhi completely forgot to care about their dislike of talking to people. For Laura, they’d do anything. Even engage in smalltalk.

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On second thought, being on the run in a strange city was maybe not the adventure Nomi had been hoping for. Buildings rushed past left and right as she hurried through paved roads, looking for escape. Behind her, the shrill whistles of the city watch had become more and more common. Curiously, she could vaguely decipher the notes, as if they’d been based on the melodic language of druids. That was how they managed to cut off her path, and how the ones on horseback knew where to go to chase her.

Nomi veered off into a small side alley as the hooves of the pursuing horses thundered louder behind her. She’d long since left behind the fish market and was now surrounded by buildings with black-tiled roofs. Grey walls passed by her side as she hurried along the alley. It wasn't very wide, slowing her pursuers a bit.

The alley opened up into a small, walled-off courtyard. Nomi turned rapidly, looking for another escape route. The wall before her was too smooth and too high as she jumped up it. A wooden door was set into it, and she ran against it and scratched at it. The boards shuddered under her attempt, but refused to give way.

Can I squeeze under it? She tried and came back up with a hoarse grumble in her panther throat. The gap was far too narrow. Maybe if she turned into a different animal? But she’d never tried more than one animal form without rest. Maybe mom’s necklace? No, I should save that for emergencies…

She spun around as the shouts behind her got louder. She paced, paws batting at the floor nervously. Her tail whipped behind her as she glanced around, eyes drifting back to the top of the roofs and the wall. Her vision was fuzzy, so she focused the magic to her eyes. It glazed over the red of her iris’ like a shifting arrangement of stained glass, colourful and sharply defined. Her vision sharpened as well, focused and became clear.

Her father had taught her this trick when she’d expressed that she had trouble seeing and glasses had done nothing to aid her vision. It also helped her find hidden things, as well as a variety of other neat stuff. But in this case, it was no use. There was no way out.

Nomi paced and twisted in the small courtyard. That worried sound at the back of her throat became louder in time with the footsteps of the watch. Slowly anxiety got a hold of her. The feeling of being cornered, trapped by strangers… all too familiar and nerve-wracking. She backed up against the wooden door as they spilled out into the space before her, her ears flat against her skull. They levelled their halberds at her, and Nomi bared her fangs in a hiss.

She could see their lifeforces glowing in their chests, through the clothes, colourful and flickering like fire. Her eyes showed her everything. The fear some of them felt, an uneasy wavering of the glow. The excitement of others, bright and blazing. The intent to hurt, drawn back into itself, ready to strike. She knew that one too well.

Her racing thoughts drowned out the words of the watch as they began to encircle her. This was not how she’d wanted her adventure to go! She should turn back, explain everything— But she was frozen. Her fur bristled and she arched her back, trying to look bigger, instinct taking over as the people inched closer, eyes hard and fixed on her. One jabbed his halberd at her and she swiped at it with a growl. Her claws scraped over metal uncomfortably.

She had to do something! Magic, change form, tell them she was no threat. But her paws were frozen to the ground, her voice stuck in a growl in her throat, her jaw so tight it hurt—

Stop it! The voice cut through Nomi’s thoughts like the cold of a fresh water spring through her summer fur. She flinched at the sudden clarity, so crystalline and sharp in her mind that it was almost painful. The guards flinched as well, turning around, losing their focus. The scrape of their boots and the creak of their leather jackets was muffled. As if a great downy wing had been draped over the world, everything sounded so much further away. Nomi’s tense shoulders relaxed, and she breathed a bit easier as the speaker stepped from the alley, pushing past people.

Nomi stared at them, curious and confused. Outwardly, there was nothing all that strange about them. They looked… interesting. Androgynous, with a handsome face and a sharp jaw, dark eyes, and white hair even though they couldn’t be much older than Nomi. They’d shorn the sides and back in an undercut and now exasperatedly pushed their hair back with slender fingers. Fingers that glowed with magic, same as their ribs and throat. It was their bones that confused Nomi. The way they glowed with magic.

She’d seen many magic users before, but this was the first time she experienced a glow so white and pure and smooth. As magic went, it felt a bit devoid of personality. It was almost a little painful to look at, and she squinted against the strange shine that eclipsed even their lifeforce. She only managed to really get a look at their clothes, which were a pair of black pants and a brown dress shirt. What stood out was the silver necklace around their neck, with a shiny, iridescent gem set into it that Nomi couldn’t quite identify. That, and the pronoun marker woven into the shirt. A braided chain around the shoulder— gold, white, royal purple and black —that split up under the arm.

The person grabbed one of the watchmen closest to Nomi and pulled him away. What do you think you’re doing? they snapped, unintimidated despite being half a foot shorter than the man.

Capturing a dangerous animal, the watchman said back, growling. There was hate in his eyes. He was one of the ones who’d been looking forward to hurting Nomi.

The newcomer glanced at Nomi, then back at the man. He had to be of higher rank than the others, given the black and ebony badge on his jacket. This ‘dangerous animal’ is clearly a druid, the glowing person said sharply. Unless you’re telling me you get a lot of animals with jewellery in their fur and silver studs in their ears here.

Well, it’s disturbing the peace—

"They, the glowing person snapped, are terrified of you. So if you really wanna press this, there better be a good reason why you started a fucking hunt on them. Are they a murderer? No? They crossed their arms. Didn’t fucking think so."

The watchman slammed his halberd down with a grunt. He leaned over the glowing person, whose magic gradually faded along with the strange muffled effect over Nomi’s ears. You don’t get to give us orders just because you’re fucking the boss! he sneered.

In an instant, blood red flowers appeared on the other person’s skin, blooming up the neck like living tattoos. They opened their mouth, eyes sparking with anger.

"What was that?" A hand, slender and dark-skinned, adorned with a thick, black ring and the same kind of gem that the other person wore around their neck, closed on the watchman’s collar. The hand’s owner pulled him down with a rough yank, despite the difference in size between the two of them. She was beautiful and striking in both a handsome and terrifying way.

Her skin had the colour of walnut wood, save for the pale scar along her right cheekbone. Her neck was thick and toned under the collar of her black shirt, which lay tight around equally thick limbs. It was adorned with a silver badge portraying the split cliffs of Blackwater from above, a spiderweb of lines, and the river that ran between them. But it wasn’t that which caught Nomi’s attention. It was her fierce, purple eyes, shining from a face framed by gently wavy, black hair that fell just below her chin where it wasn’t tied back.

Nomi found herself staring a bit. Not just because she was beautiful, but because her lifeforce, burning and dark like amethyst, was unlike anything Nomi had ever seen. Undamaged. Without even a hint of decay. With most people Nomi looked at, she could instinctively tell how much longer they had to live. But this woman? She was eternal.

She was also breathtakingly hot, so that contributed to the staring.

I’m just saying… The man trailed off.

The woman raised an eyebrow. "Go on. Explain to me why you’ve chased some druid all the way across the fucking city. I’d love to hear this." There was a growl in her voice, and Nomi caught the flash of sharp canines behind her lips. Other than those, she looked Untouched— Not affected by Fey or Fell or Primal magic like some of the people where Nomi came from.

Back home, she’d been told that on the mainland everyone in power was Touched. That they had magic at their command. Her mother had called those stories nonsense. It was one of the reasons why Nomi had wanted to leave, to learn more for herself rather than having to blindly accept what she was told.

The mage approached Nomi slowly as the watchman argued with his superior. Hey, are you okay? they said softly, the glow in their bones had now fully receded, leaving them looking just androgynous and gorgeous. They crouched down in front of Nomi. Nobody’s gonna hurt you. Can you turn into a human for me?

Nomi meowed, then bashfully realized that they couldn’t understand her. Magic lifted from her like wings spreading to no longer envelop her, and she was human again. I’m fine, she said quickly. Her eyes kept flicking back to the other woman.

That’s good. Her saviour smiled. I’m Rhi. I use they/them pronouns—

Oh, I know! Nomi interrupted as she got up and then quickly shut her mouth. Sorry, too excited, she said quickly, gesturing to their marker.

Rhi glanced at their shoulder and smiled softly. Ah, yeah. I like being pretty open about it.

It looks great on you. Nomi fiddled with the strap of her leather bag, brown with green underlying patterns. I’m Nomi, she added. She/Her. Then she remembered her manners and saluted Rhi. Thank you so much for your help. She beamed at them. Maybe being chased wasn’t quite so bad if she got to meet more queer people.

They blinked at her, surprised. What was that?

She cocked her head innocently. What was what?

That…? They gestured to her hand. You don’t have to salute me.

Nomi felt her cheeks redden in sudden embarrassment. They probably thought she was weird, now. Oh, that’s how we do it back home, Nomi clarified, averting her eyes nervously. I don’t like handshakes.

Ah, I see. Rhi rubbed their neck, which glowed with blue flowers. That’s fair. They didn’t sound too put-off by it, so Nomi gave them a little smile.

It faltered when their eyes met. Rhi’s own expression had changed to one of surprise. No wonder, since their eyes had turned black with a colourful rainbow shimmer over them. Nomi stared into their eyes, saw the translucent, dark wings that shimmered colourful on their back like the rainbow sheen a film of lantern oil on water. And as their eyes met, she knew that Rhi could see her own, which rested invisible at her back, each feather glowing akin to stained glass.

Her heart beat a bit faster. The chase was forgotten. For the first time in her life she’d finally met someone who was just like her.

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2

Chapter 2

A Garden of Crystal

Nomi clamped her mouth shut before a noise of surprise could escape her. You’re like… me. Her incorporeal wings fluttered with excitement.

Rhi blinked at her. Yeah. Yeah, I am! They looked just as surprised, and just as excited. Stars! That’s just… wow.

Nomi leaned in, holding on to her bag strap with nervously clenched fingers. "I’ve never met anyone who’s like me!" she whispered, quietly to not risk any of the watchpeople overhearing them.

Neither have I! Rhi whispered back. I mean, I have— But they aren’t really like me. Long story, they added a little louder. You’re a druid, right? From Volundaar?

That put Nomi back on the defensive. How do you know that? she asked, now suspicious. She felt the weight of her scimitar by her side, a black weapon with a golden and black hawk pommel.

Ah, sorry, Rhi said quickly, shifting back ever so gently as if to give her some space. It’s the accent. Well, and the clothes. They gestured a little. Druid clothes. And that pendant around your neck is glowing with magic. There aren’t that many clans that can just produce something like that.

They stopped themself when Nomi grasped the pendant and hid it. It was pretty, three black-tipped white owl feathers affixed to a golden chain by drops of amber. It was also distinct, as it turned out, and Nomi would rather not be found out so easily.

Sorry if I spooked you, Rhi said a little softer. I kinda have a thing for details… My brain just latches on to them. I didn’t mean to frighten you.

It’s okay, Nomi said back quickly, feeling a little foolish. Of course this random stranger wouldn’t know how uncomfortable she was with her home. How could they? They had no idea who she really was. So… Am I gonna get arrested?

Depends, Rhi shrugged and put their hands on their hips. Did you commit a crime?

Nomi thought. I stowed away on a boat?

Rhi laughed. Well, if they try to arrest you for that, they’ll have to try and arrest me too. Which is not happening. They gestured back to where the pretty woman was chewing out the watch members, who looked suitably uncomfortable.

Nomi let out a relieved sigh. Good. She got stuck on watching the pretty woman again, whose ring glinted with the same stone Rhi had around their neck. Some kind of rainbow topaz, maybe? So… She’s with you? she asked.

Oh, yeah. Laura and I are… together, Rhi said, hesitating just a bit. Don’t let her intimidate you, she’s a softie.

Intimidate me? Nomi blinked at them. But… She’s tiny. Rhi was about four inches shorter than her, Laura at least eight.

Rhi giggled. Yeah, she is… They watched Laura with a soft look, then waved Nomi along. Come on, let’s get you out of here before the head bitch arrives.

Just then, a sharp voice bellowed, What’s going on here? Why is nobody doing their fucking job?

Rhi sighed. Speak of the devil…

A woman pushed through the now quiet and sheepish crowd of watchmen. She was about Rhi’s height, five-foot-six, and wore the same breastplate as the rest of the watch, just covering the chest and not the abdomen. But her leather jacket was black and her badge silver like Laura’s. Her skin was pale white, her black hair tied back into a tight ponytail. Eyes so stark blue that they made Nomi shudder latched on to her and Rhi for a second.

That, Rhi muttered, is Comedra Kal. Just between us, she’s an asshole.

The woman stepped up to Laura. "Why are you holding up all of our guards? What could they have possibly done wrong this time?" She sounded exasperated, and it showed in her expression.

Laura, who had been so steadfast and stern just a moment ago, flinched under her gaze. They hunted a druid through the streets for no fucking reason! she said. And—

Let me guess, Comedra sighed. Rhi convinced you to make trouble again.

They had nothing to do with it! Laura protested.

Comedra gestured at them and Nomi with a black-gloved hand Then why are they at a crime scene, again?

This isn’t a crime scene! And I’ve never taken them to one! Laura crossed her arms. She gave Rhi a glance. Just a brief look and a nudge with her head, and Rhi gently tugged Nomi’s poncho.

Come on, they whispered and guided her back out of the courtyard, along the alley.

Nomi glanced back briefly, sensing the tension between Laura and Comedra. The captain braced her hands on her hips, giving Laura a long, hard look. You know, this is why this isn’t working out, she then said, softer, gesturing between them. You constantly try to undermine my authority and order my people around!

Rhi led her away quickly, so Nomi didn’t get to hear the response. They passed the watch members still lingering about, having received conflicting orders. A few of them shot Nomi dirty looks that made her skin crawl and her hidden feathers bristle. She kept her gaze straight ahead. But Rhi’s steps were quick and Nomi hurried to keep up with them as they swiftly guided her well out of sight.

Who was that? Nomi asked. The mean woman? How can she talk to the pretty one like that?

Comedra Kal happens to be the captain of the city watch, Rhi said, clearing their throat. And Laura’s girlfriend.

Wait… her girlfriend? It took Nomi a moment to process that. But… she’s mean! The brief conversation did not strike her as what girlfriends should be like with each other.

Yeah… Rhi dropped their shoulders in a sigh. I honestly don’t see that lasting for too much longer.

Nomi nodded quietly and fiddled with the strap of her bag. Part of her wanted to keep talking about Laura— Not for any particular reason. But Nomi liked women, Laura seemed to like women… And Nomi hadn’t met too many people who were like her. But at the same time, there was Rhi, who was like her in a way even fewer people were.

Why does she not like you? The words slipped out before she could think better of it. You said you and Laura were together…? She’d probably misunderstood them, thinking it was romantic because of how fiercely Laura’s eyes had sparked when defending them.

Rhi rubbed their neck. Blue flowers bloomed on their fingers. Well… Laura and I are sort of together. And despite how she keeps reassuring Laura to the contrary, she’s not super happy with that. They coughed and moved their hand to their throat, rubbing it.

Nomi stopped in her tracks. Wait… How does that work? She wasn’t sure what to think. She really hoped there was a good explanation though, and waited patiently as Rhi slowed.

Then she frowned as they hunched and heaved a little. She almost reached out to touch them, put a gentle, soothing hand on their back. But they’d just talked about how neither of them liked to be touched, at least regarding handshakes. So instead she asked, Are you okay? It sounded like they were choking. I can pat you on the back if that helps.

Rhi, fully hunched and turned away now, raised a hand as if to stop her, hold her back. Then they retched and threw up a stream of feathers. The downs weren’t entirely white. A lot of them were wet with blood and splattered to the ground into the shallow drain canal carved into the side of the road.

Nomi stepped back in surprise. Holy shit! What the fuck, are you okay? She nearly rushed forward, healing magic glowing golden in her hands, but hesitated helplessly. None of her parents’ books had prepared her for something like this.

Rhi’s skin had filled with blue and grey flowers and vines that snaked around their neck. They held on to the side of the building they were next to and remained hunched, rasping softly. I, um… They coughed and spat blood. Sorry.

Are you okay? Nomi asked again, pulling her indecisive hands back and clenching them gently to her chest. She didn’t like feeling so helpless.

Rhi spat another feather, stood upright, and took a deep breath. I’m fine. Their voice certainly wasn’t. It was hoarse and raspy. This is normal, they added with a reassuring, bloody smile, trying to put her at ease. The price of my magic.

Nomi stared at them. "That is not normal."

Oh. Rhi looked down at the bloody feathers. Does that not happen to you?

No?? Nomi hesitated. Can I heal you? You’re clearly in pain, and I can help.

The other angel hesitated. Your magic doesn’t have any drawbacks like that? they asked hoarsely.

Nope. Nomi had heard of magic that came with side effects, but those were usually fiend pacts or fey bargains. Not something she could really see Rhi doing, and not something she had any interest in.

Rhi nodded. Okay then, they rasped, barely audible over the sound of a carriage passing by on the cobblestone streets. If you’re sure…

Nomi reached out and cupped her hands around their neck. She focused on the anchor of her magic, the feeling of happiness she held for the people she loved. The desire to protect them. She saw her baby brother, Jasper, the day he’d gotten his own anchor and his own magic. He’d asked her to braid his hair all pretty like hers, so she did. His golden eyes had sparkled with such excitement. It was before the magic had turned his hair white like hers.

Seeing him beam excitedly at how he looked a little more like his big sister had driven tears to Nomi’s eyes. That same feeling of happiness now filled her with warmth. It was almost instinctual at this point. Her magic glowed under her skin, golden and soothing, seeped into Rhi and found torn tissue, clotting injuries, tiny tears. Their vocal cords were strained and damaged. Nomi took a deep breath and willed them to heal.

Her arrival on the mainland had caused quite the stir. It hadn’t gone as smoothly as she liked, and Nomi was still unsure what to really make of Rhi, whether she could trust them with her secret… She hoped she could. For now, the best she could do was to be kind and hope for kindness in return. And to maybe leave the city until things had calmed down, so she wouldn’t be chased or stared at like back home.

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Laura— ruler of the Ashwood, Lady of Ash and currently investigatory aid to the Blackwater watch —suppressed a deep, deep sigh as Rhi left and took the girl, Nomi, with them. She crossed her arms and glanced at Comedra. This is why this isn’t working out. That one stung. Frictions were normal in relationships, but Laura had done her best to adapt to Comedra's needs and desires. Still, seeing Comedra glance aside and not meet her gaze, hands braced on her hips and shoulders stiff, made her feel guilty. They were similar in age, but Comedra was even more guarded with her heart than Laura. And recently… things hadn’t been working out.

I hardly think that’s your fault, a voice in the back of her mind whispered, familiar as her own, but Laura pushed it aside.

Listen, she said softly and pulled the white gloves from her belt to don them. I’m sorry for going against your wishes. But… This is literally what you asked me to help you with. Directing your people to deal with the actual criminal issue of the city. She reached out and gently took Comedra’s hand. She lifted it from her hip and squeezed it gently. Her girlfriend turned her pale blue eyes to her.

You don’t have to keep undermining me, she said.

Was she even there?

Laura bit her tongue as the exact same question crossed her mind. Farah, her twin sister who shared her mind and her very soul, was overly protective at times. But she was less diplomatic in her approach than Laura, and this moment demanded gentleness. Laura looked into Comedra’s eyes, squeezing her hand.

I’m not trying to undermine you, she said intently, but in a soft tone. Comedra had so much on her plate already… Your people were chasing some harmless little druid instead of doing the tasks assigned to them. You told me to direct them, that’s what I’m doing. I hardly think you’d like them running after animals instead of watching out for actual threats.

Comedra sighed. She ran a hand over her tightly bound, black hair. Can you just stop bringing Rhi along to stuff like this? she muttered.

Laura cocked her head. I bring them along because they can help, she said. They know more about smuggler signs and criminal codes than anyone else in the city. They’re the only reason we’ve come this far! Just last week, Rhi’s knowledge had led them to discover a stash of magical snares, volatile, dangerous and unsanctioned by any of the local authorities.

Comedra rubbed her forehead with a gloved hand. I know they’re useful, she said, her tone sharper. But it’s kind of a bad look when my girlfriend keeps consulting her side piece over me!

Excuse me?? This time it was a snarl in Laura’s mind. She felt her own hands, her claws, clench around a piece of wood and splinter it. But it wasn’t her, it was Farah, and Farah wasn’t here, Laura was.

She took a deep breath, suppressing