Beyond The Night Cold

By Divan Braga

Alice, an only child of divorced parents, is a young woman who hides her past and goes to New York with the intention of meeting people and starting a new life. In her faithful attempt to stay out of relationships and protect feminine values, she meets a guy who makes her separate concepts. But she isn t aware that he also hides his past. An analysis of the universe s probabilities and values ​​of life, Beyond the Night Cold raises perspectives on psychological issues and the study of the characters personality that can be applied in real life.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Clube de Autores
• Release date: Oct 27, 2021

Book preview

Beyond The Night Cold - Divan Braga PART I

• 1 •

Beyond The Night Cold - Divan Braga PROLOGUE

ALICE RECEIVED THE CALL at exactly midnight.

Her bare feet felt the floor while she, with her eyes tired of crying, expressed nothing in the darkness of the room.

Sitting on the bed, she looked at her own silhouette reflected in the mirror in front of her, caused by the moonlight coming in through the window. Hair cut stiffly at the neck. The silent face. Small dark circles under the eyes.

Sad, but expressionless. Just hearing the muffled sound of heavy rain falling on the city at 11:59 pm.

She looked at the floor. At the strands of her black hair cut, incomplete, lying on the cold gravel that she could feel with the soles of her feet. She looked at the scissors in her hand.

She dropped it, then heard the clink of metal hitting the dark slab from which geometric figures were drawn as melancholy as the darkness itself.

She threw herself on her back, without looking or caring where she would fall, and felt the softness of the bedspread under her back. The feet stopped touching the ground.

• 2 •

Beyond The Night Cold - Divan Braga She already knew. She knew what was about to happen.

But she wasn't afraid to just let it happen.

She saw a flash that lit up the room for a fraction of a second. She heard thunder. And so suddenly that it would give her a brief fright at another time, her phone vibrated. Three times.

She already knew. She knew who was calling her. And she knew what he wanted. And she still wasn't afraid to let it happen.

She hesitated for a moment, then quickly got up until she reached the device and grabbed it from over the desk.

She answered.

There was a long silence, with the sound of rain playing softly in the background.

Alice? The voice came out with a noise, probably because of the rain. Or not.

He called again:

"Alice? "

She just stood there, hearing his voice, sweet and simple.

In a tone that could only offer peace and protection, as it had always been. She had never heard that voice represent anything bad, ever.

Suddenly, she saw all the memories she had with him go through her eyes, the happy times where problems were faced instead of ignored, where her dreams, now replaced by hallucinations, reminded her of a happy future. Or a normal future. Or any future other than the one she now contemplated.

And, suddenly, she was afraid. The fear she should have been feeling hours ago, days ago. The fear of allowing to happen what she knew that was going to happen at that precise moment.

• 3 •

Beyond The Night Cold - Divan Braga She decided not to answer, in order to be able to hear his voice one more time, calling her name again. But her hopes had no effect. Instead, he began to say what shattered her even further, what she knew he was going to say, but that now terrified her.

• • •

SHE STOOD UP. ACCELERATED heartbeat.

Yes. That was exactly what she thought she was going to hear on that call, at that precise point of the call, and as much as she already knew it before it happened, the pain felt a hundred times stronger now that he had actually said it.

Everything fell apart. She could feel the darkness getting closer and closer, enveloping her with its icy dark wings while she just wanted to cry. Everything had been much better while it still was on the assumption. Someone had thrust a dagger into her heart as hard and as deep as possible, just to see it bleed. And that someone was him.

She felt the burning tears struggle to break free, but she closed her eyes for a second and stopped them.

Sadness.

…Alice?

She hung up, staring at the void - if that was possible. The void that had just emerged within her.

She had to think faster than she ever could, so she was happy to rush into the first thing that came to mind: At a speed she couldn't even imagine, she knelt down to pick up the coat that was lying on the floor next to a pair of All Star shoes, put on her coat, put on her shoes, went to the door, left the compartment, taking the cell phone with her, crossed the

• 4 •

Beyond The Night Cold - Divan Braga gloomy corridor whose white wall on the right hung a copy of Guernica on the damp and worn paper.

She went to the main door and opened it, being suddenly attacked by the cold gust of wind and droplets of rain with its depressing noise. Her hair - now short - flying in the cold wind.

She closed her eyes and raised her open hand in a failed attempt to protect herself from the wind.

She raised the hood. She ran to the car, passing through the flash of a yellowish focal lamp of a lamppost under the rain, feeling the bulky drops wet her coat behind her and the cold freeze her fingers.

She got into the car, and only then she felt the vibration of her cell phone. She answered.

• • •

"BUT... WHAT ARE YOU... what are you talking about? No!

You... you can’t do this to me! Ever! "

She parked slowly, feeling the small amount of strength she had left drain from her.

Anxiety engulfed her as she opened the door quickly, wishing her feet were out of the way so she could run freely until she got to where she wanted to be. The room he was in.

Small fragments of tears were already accumulating in the corners of her eyes, mixed with raindrops, becoming larger. A lightning flashed in the dark sky, where only a few stars could be seen, most of them covered by night clouds that prevented the view of the vastness.

Alice got out of the car and ran into the building. The little time she spent exposed to the rain was enough to get soaked,

• 5 •

Beyond The Night Cold - Divan Braga her clothes and hair wet. The void throughout the building allowed more speed.

When she reached the room, she saw him. Tears appearing and sliding down her face. Only then he hung up, watching her silently. A long silence emerged, with pauses in the young woman's sobs:

You can't do that...

A lock of hair came loose and slid to the forehead, covering part of the eyes.

She ran quickly until she reached him, at the other side of the wide compartment.

They embraced.

She closed her eyes tightly, with the face wet, clinging to that body, and pressed him hard.

You can't do that! Her voice was drowned out by the young man's thick coat. You can’t leave me here! Ever!

There was a moment of silence until Alice looked up very slowly, to see him standing still.

You can't... she repeated, squeezing him even more.

She felt something touch on her chin. It was his hand, which raised it slowly.

You'll be fine.

No! You know I'll never be okay! The arms wrapped around him made her want to squeeze. - Don't do it! I would never forget. - She tried to calm down, although it was difficult.

The impossible had happened. Or it was about to happen.

A dark future seemed to involve the sad girl, which could lead to days of insomnia, days of crying, pain, suffering.

Please... Taking a deep breath, she raised her wet face to watch him.

• 6 •

Beyond The Night Cold - Divan Braga He was motionless, expressionless, empty, without compassion, without fear, without hate, without love for her, without showing a single point of any feeling that existed in the entire universe. His black eyes watching the rain outside.

For the first time in the space of time that they had been together, since the moment they had met, she couldn't stop him.

She had lost all power over the young man, and, listening to the rain outside, she felt it all even more.

She could remember:

Can I try to guess what it is? He asked.

Sure, Alice said.

He waited half a second for his first guess:

Is it a necktie?

It is a necktie.

They laughed. He hugged her.

And now they were both there, alone. Alice crying, he expressionless.

Have you thought about how I'll be if you do this?

Yes. But the joy must be with the majority. Everyone will be happy, and only one person sad.

They no longer embraced.

A person who should have the same value as everyone else together.

No monster should be live. Or next to someone, or even too close to someone. I should have died, Alice.

What do you mean?

She saw his empty smile.

You'll be fine. He turned to the window, seeing the thick rain. But I? I'm a monster.

• 7 •

Beyond The Night Cold - Divan Braga

• 8 •

Beyond The Night Cold - Divan Braga CHAPTER ONE

(SEVEN MONTHS BEFORE)

THE BLUE SEEMED TO have more color that morning, as if the whole city were covered by a semitransparent layer of fog. The roads looked very well paved, at least in that part of the city. The sky was clear and exhibited its beauty above the houses in movement. Just a perfect and inspiring day to start anew.

It was only 8:00 in the morning. Alice was on the road, being able to feel the wind blowing in her face, her long hair flying as she heard the magnificent sound of Frank O’Hara at a considerable volume. She was hoping she’d have good luck.

Yes, she hoped. And she would have. At best.

She hummed a part of the song, and then saw the city far away, in the size of a dot. Period? Not in that case.

The cell phone rang as she approached the first traffic light.

Calm down..., she whispered to whoever was calling, while slowing down.

She answered.

Alice speaking.

• 9 •

Beyond The Night Cold - Divan Braga

Hey! How are you? The voice sounded a little tired.

Maybe even a little off-key.

...Boris?

The one and only.

Damn it. Anyone but Boris.

Wow, I'm sorry, I didn't recognize your voice. There is a lot of noise around here.

Hey, no problem.

She leaned over, just enough to get a look at the traffic light. Still red.

So, how are you? He asked.

Uh... I... I'm fine. How about you?

I'm great!

Cool!, she tried to demonstrates some interest, but she wasn't good at that. At all.

The coincidence would be extraordinarily great if Boris were calling just for calling. He was going to mention it. He sure would. And just when she thought about it, as if by magic, he mentioned, in his off-key voice:

So... Harry told me you'll come to New York.

She closed her eyes in disapproval. Hating herself for being bad at lying - what, in her case, was an extraordinarily huge irony.

Yes. Well, actually...

Someone honked behind her. A bald, mustachioed man, according to the rearview mirror.

She checked the traffic light once again. Green.

Boris, I have to go. I'll...

Wait, what were you saying?

...call you later. Maybe even today, because I'll...

Wait!

• 10 •

Beyond The Night Cold - Divan Braga

...get a little busy.

Alright, but what were you going to say?

She hesitated. The mustachioed little man honked his horn five more times, impatient.

I'm already in New York. And she hung up.

She thought of backing up and ruining the hood of the angry little man behind her. But instead, she swallowed her impatience and made her way to Arthur Avenue.

• • •

Boris would surely try to get in touch with her later, what would be a tragedy, at least for her. She certainly shouldn't have told him that she had already arrived. She should have lied. Yes, she should have said she was still in Baltimore