Strangled By Life, Saved By Death

By Charles D. McPhail

Was our daughter a real heavenly angel living amongst us? Did you know that a large percentage of marriages will end in divorce after losing a child? This story is about my Christian family and our journey through the hardships of life. The loss of our home, cars, career, and our precious ten-year old daughter, Elizabeth. We share our story on coming to know Jesus, how we dealt with issues in our faith, and how we persevered after being tested to the core. We explore our past from seeing shadows and ghosts to having the devil himself at the foot of my bed. I will take you through the pain of losing a child, and the different stages of grief, from day one to eleven years later (from all three perspectives: mother, father, and sibling). Find out what saved my marriage and who saved my life. My hopes are that this will plant seeds about our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, and may heal and even save souls, while making God proud. If you or someone you know is having difficult times, please read this book, as it may help cope with some of the pain. Thank you for investing your time into my life.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Page Publishing, Inc.
• Release date: Oct 22, 2019
• ISBN: 9781645440376

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Strangled By Life, Saved By Death

Charles D. McPhail

Copyright © 2019 Charles McPhail

All rights reserved

First Edition

PAGE PUBLISHING, INC.

New York, NY

First originally published by Page Publishing, Inc. 2019

ISBN 978-1-64544-038-3 (Paperback)

ISBN 978-1-64544-037-6 (Digital)

All scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the Holy Bible: The Full Life Study Bible-King James Version

Copyright © 1992 by Life Publishers International

All rights reserved.

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means- electronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, or any other- except for brief quotations in printed reviews, without the prior permission of the publisher.

Printed in the United States of America

Table of Contents

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 1

Finding Jesus

My wife, Andrea Marie, and I met through a mutual friend back when we were only thirteen years old. However, we went to different high schools because I lived a few cities over, but I was always over at my grandma’s house, which was a few blocks from Marie. We always stayed in touch until we began to date seriously at the age of fifteen. Then we spent every waking hour we could together, as we were young and in love.

We had a lot in common. For instance, when she was a young child, her parents divorced, and her father decided to start a new life in California. Then about the same age, my mother and new stepfather left for California with my brother and sisters, only to leave me behind to be raised by my dad and grandma. I will never forget the day my mom left, as I vividly remember running after the taxi crying for it to stop. So it’s safe to say, we both had some abandonment issues while growing up. To be teenagers and not seeing our parents, you can imagine we stuck to each other like glue, and that seemed to give us that amazing bond that a couple needs to last a lifetime. We started dating again and never looked back, as we just celebrated our twenty-third year wedding anniversary this past June. Don’t get me wrong, looking back on how young we actually were and now currently having a son who is seventeen, we were just babies.¹

Nonetheless we knew what we wanted in life and nothing was going to stop us. While all our friends in high school were at parties, we would hang out at her house. Most of the time we would be watching her younger brothers while her parents went out for the night. We would sit around and discuss how many kids we wanted and how we would raise them. We were a couple of weird kids! I even remember one Thanksgiving, my future in-laws went up north except for Marie. So we decided to have our own little Thanksgiving dinner. We were about sixteen at the time. I remember that we went to the store and bought a couple of Cornish hens in place of the turkey, and before you know it, we had our very first holiday dinner together. Again, weird kids. I don’t want to paint fairy-tale views of our relationship as it was not perfect. We most certainly went through many of the same situations and issues every young couple would go through. We attended different high schools, and being so young, meant it was not always easy to see each other, besides weekends, special occasions, and holidays. But somehow we made it work. We made light of it by using our parents telephones. Maybe being apart during the week gave us a chance to miss each other. We, however, talked every night and to the point my father would yell at me to wrap it up because I had been on the phone for an hour. Two lovebirds, I know at this point you’re either thinking, They are so sweet or They make me sick, and I would say there is a good chance they’re both right. However we were two different types of people. I was the captain of the football team and team’s MVP, while Marie was the shy girl who barely made eye contact with people. However, even though we were different in that particular way, we liked the same things, had the same sense of humor, and enjoyed many of the same things in life.²

My father loved Marie. He just didn’t like the fact that I tied myself down like I did. I remember my dad saying, You shouldn’t be tied down to a girlfriend at such a young age. There are lots of amazing girls out there, and you have plenty of time to have a serious girlfriend, you should be out with your friends getting into trouble. He again had no issues or problems with Marie. He loved her. They bonded during my football games. My dad was always really good about making sure I had a Christmas or Valentine’s gift for her, and many times he would pay for it too. He was great with my girlfriend, and I understood he just wanted me to enjoy school, school parties, and other events. I remember telling him once, Why would I let something go that is everything I wanted, just to have to look for that same special person later, especially when the person is already right here? I am proud to say that we are stronger today than any time in our thirty-year relationship. Pretty great accomplishment, I would say. Along the way we sure endured plenty of low moments in life, as we had lost a child, homes, cars, careers, and almost my wife and best friend. Somehow through all these trials and tribulations, the one thing that did not leave my side and the one thing no man could rip from me was my faith in Christ. Faith, along with my son, Riley, are the only things that keep me plowing forward during these difficult trials in our life.

You know what I am talking about, because none of us go through life unscathed, as there will be constant trials and tribulations coming at you at all times and all throughout your life. It will come many times in many forms, and at times it seems like it’s coming from all different directions as your life spirals out of control. Welcome to the devil’s playground, a.k.a. planet Earth, so buckle up because the devil will aim to destroy your mind, body, and soul. I am going to take you through our personal journey and also open up and share some strange things that had happened throughout our Lives.³

We have endured everything from ghosts, shadows, voices, angelic visions, and personal experience of losing a child and how it tore our family apart and how we are coping eleven years later. This book is also to show how God is with you every step of your existence, so know even in your darkest of moments, he is by your side. You can’t ask for a better partner in life. You can lose everything you own, but no man can ever take control of your soul or your personal relationship with God.

By accepting Christ as your Lord and Savior, it will allow you to bypass death and be granted eternal life. The main reason for writing this was because I want you to keep your faith and remain faithful during your darkest of times. We all go through some serious, lonely times, and you deserve God’s love even when you think you don’t. Through Christ, you are my sisters and brothers, and even though I may not know you personally, I want to say, I love you.

Marie Came to Know Jesus

Marie came to know Jesus before I did. When she was about twenty years old, she had a very intense dream about the end of the world. This nightmare was so severe it woke her out of a dead sleep. That caused many tears, and in her scared state of shock, she ran to her parents with loads of questions about the Bible, as she felt an overwhelming hunger to learn more. It was from that day she learned about Christ, and with the help from her mom and stepfather, she surrendered herself to Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior.

Charles Came to Know Jesus

I had accepted Christ a few years after Marie. I had always believed in God, but being raised in a home with no Bible present, I didn’t have much knowledge about Christianity. But, after witnessing the positivity in Marie, I knew that I wanted to experience that too. ⁴

So, one day, our puppy that we had gotten together, a mutt, which we named Scruffy, became violently ill. The veterinarian came in and told us Scruffy had parvo and that she only had a 10% chance of making it through the night. They later placed Scruffy on an intravenous line and then told us to say our goodbyes as they really felt she wouldn’t survive the night. I remember later that evening, Marie saw that I was upset about the situation, and she simply told me to pray about things. That night for the first time I reached out to God asking for help. Marie and I knelt down in my grandmother’s living room and prayed. The very next morning, the veterinarian called and said, Scruffy is running around and ready to come home. What a miracle! Please don’t think that if my dog would not have been saved that night, I would not be a Christian today. However, it did open my eyes to Anything is possible, and if anything is possible, then God being real is possible. That’s when I started to thirst