At Her Back: (Cuando La Virgen Me Dio La Espalda)

By Fanny Mayahuel-Thomas

At Her Back (Cuando La Virgen Me Dio La Espalda) is an autobiographical book about the resilience of the human spirit. The story is told through the eyes of Fanny as a child. The many difficult moments that she experienced would make her question spirituality and religion.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Page Publishing, Inc.
• Release date: Nov 17, 2020
• ISBN: 9781643346939

Book preview

cover.jpg

At Her Back

(Cuando La Virgen Me Dio La Espalda)

Fanny Mayahuel-Thomas

Copyright © 2020 Fanny Mayahuel-Thomas

All rights reserved

First Edition

PAGE PUBLISHING, INC.

Conneaut Lake, PA

First originally published by Page Publishing 2020

ISBN 978-1-64334-699-1 (pbk)

ISBN 978-1-64334-693-9 (digital)

Printed in the United States of America

Tabla de contenido

My Religious Beliefs

Our First Home

Under the Stairs

Hope, Neglect, and Trauma

Black and White

Her Kisses, Happiness, and School

The Lock

The Infamy

My Paternal Grandmother

His Tactic

The Last Supper and a Renewed Hope

In the Devil’s Shadow

The Bribe and Hate

Tickle Games

My Fault

Goodbyes

This work is dedicated to Mack, Darian, and Evan. Thank you for inspiring me to be a better person every day; you have my deepest gratitude, love, and respect.

Introduction

I wrote this book to bring attention to some of the injustices that I suffered as a child. Abuse leaves the victim with scars that last a lifetime. However, the legal system has limits pertaining to when a crime of this nature can be reported. I tried to bring the abuser to justice in the United States, where I was told that I had to go to the country in which the crime had been committed. I then traveled to Mexico with the sole purpose of accusing him and bringing him to justice, only to be dismissed and told that the statute of limitations had passed. The experience of recounting the abuse three times to the authorities with no vindication left me revictimized. There was no justice for me, only the hope that I would learn to become a whole person someday.

I have intentionally left my siblings names out of the story in case they ever want to tell their own story. I love and respect them immensely.

I want you to know that the abuse you suffer is not your fault and you will not be small and unprotected always. There comes a day when things change and the tables turn. And on that day, you know you have survived.

Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that.

Martin Luther King Jr.

It’s as if I am underwater. Everything is blurry, and the sounds are muffled. My heart beats fast, and there is a deep pit in my stomach. The warmth of the sun hits my face, and I awake to a group of boys that are screaming and pushing at me; my fear helps me walk fast, and I keep my face up. I climb into the back of the truck as they keep screaming obscenities. One of the boys picks up a rock. I don’t understand why the anger? Why the hate? Is it because we are leaving and they are staying? I begin to cry. The rocks begin to hit the truck, and one of the rocks hits my forehead; my tears baptize my blood between my fingers. In the distance, my eyes get fixed upon her home, her space, her prison. As we leave, there is a deep sadness that overtakes me. Even though I feel everything that has happened is not my fault, it has happened without her knowing, and yet it saddens me to know that I will not see her face again. On my way home, I won’t be passing by her telling her that I am okay and to please watch over my brothers and sisters and to watch over