Deadly Little Secret

By Sierra Dean

After a rescue mission in South America resulted in Secret McQueen accidentally becoming a werewolf again, she is forced to navigate the New York City supernatural world in a way she never has before. She's been a vampire/werewolf hybrid. She's been a human. Now she's something both brand new and totally familiar.

As she adjusts to what her change means for her husband Desmond and the pack, a rogue group of wolves is on the rise, and their leader is hell-bent on making a move on the throne. To make matters worse, he wants Secret's death to kick-start the revolution.

While she deals with werewolf drama in one hand, marriage counseling with two husbands in the other, she's going to need to learn to juggle, because Holden and the vampire Tribunal need her help as well. It seems Calliope, the immortal innkeeper to baby vampires of the East Coast, has vanished without a trace, and Secret will need to dip her toe back into fairy politics and promises if she's going to solve that otherworldly mystery.

And she thought moving back to New York would make her life easier.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Bryant Street Publishing
• Release date: Jan 31, 2023
• ISBN: 9781094451619

Sierra Dean

Sierra Dean is the kind of adult who forgot she was supposed to grow up. She spends most of her days making up stories, and most of her evenings watching baseball or playing video games. She lives in Winnipeg, Canada with two temperamental cats and one sweet tempered dog. When not building new worlds, she can be found making cupcakes and checking Twitter.

Book preview

Chapter One

When I signed up for couples therapy, I had assumed I would only be going with one husband.

What I hadn’t anticipated was spending one hour every week with my previously deceased first husband, Lucas, and my always alive current husband, Desmond.

Things had gotten confusing when Lucas came back from the dead.

They got more confusing when he accidentally bit me and turned me into a werewolf.

You know how some people say it’s a long story? Well, ours was an epic for the ages.

I sat between Lucas and Desmond, each of us in our own designated black leather chair. Across from us was Dr. Peggy Simmons, who had previously been just Desmond’s and my marriage counselor. I was glad she was accustomed to the weirdness of werewolf culture, but even for the pack, this was pretty out there.

Dr. Peggy kept a vanilla candle burning in her office, which was an unusual choice for someone who spent time with supernatural beings on a regular basis. Now that I’d been bitten, I could smell the vanilla more powerfully than in my human days, and it was so sweet I was starting to get a headache.

In all fairness, the headache might have been from the situation rather than the scent, though.

Secret, you look uncomfortable, Dr. Peggy said.

You are a keen observer of the human condition, Dr. Peggy. My arms were crossed tightly over my chest and my knee was bouncing a mile a minute.

Dr. Peggy looked up from her leather folio, her pen going still on the notepad. I had a long-standing urge to know all the things she wrote about me, but I was sure it was mostly what is that poor man doing with this woman?

I asked myself that from time to time as well.

Secret, we’ve talked about this. I know the situation is difficult, but if you don’t participate, we can’t make any headway.

"I’m here, aren’t I?"

A step in the right direction, certainly.

Only took adding the extra husband to get her to show up, Desmond said. It was a barbed comment, but he was smirking. There were plenty of things about this situation that made him angry, but I don’t think he was bothered by Lucas’s presence. He and Lucas had been best friends since birth, and once upon a time they even had adjusted to the notion of sharing a soul mate.

But no one had expected me to be married to both of them.

Lucas had been unusually quiet since we arrived, his chin perched on one folded hand as he leaned away from both Desmond and me, as if physical distance could save him from having to interact with us. Unfortunately for Lucas, he was over six feet tall and looked like Thor, so it was hard to ignore him.

Desmond, have you and Lucas spoken about what happened in Peru? During our last session you both expressed an interest in hashing that out privately without Secret’s involvement. Were you able to have that time together?

No. The smile faded from Desmond’s face, and suddenly we were back in deadly serious mode.

From a completely selfish point of view, I wanted to be the focus of the conversation. It was me, after all, who had been turned into a werewolf against my will. I’d spent the first twenty-five years of my life as a vampire-werewolf hybrid, and managed to rid myself of both conditions, letting me live a nice, normal human life with no shapeshifting and no desire to drink blood.

Unfortunately for me, I was a carrier of the lycanthrope gene, which meant one bite and, well…furry once more.

Still, I understood the betrayal Desmond felt. He had been trying to coax me into allowing him to turn me back into a werewolf for over a year. He was the king of the Eastern werewolves, and having a human for a queen put me and the whole pack at risk. He just wanted to know I was safe, but I had resisted.

And now here we were, and I was a werewolf, but my first husband had been the one to bite me.

Hence: therapy.

Do you think you’re avoiding that conversation intentionally? This was directed at Lucas.

Intentionally? No.

So, it’s a subconscious urge to avoid conflict then.

Wouldn’t you agree almost everyone has a subconscious urge to avoid conflict? he asked her.

That made Dr. Peggy smile. I suppose that’s true, Lucas.

In my purse, my phone let out an audible bzz-bzz notification alert. Politely, all four of us pretended not to hear it. Then a moment later it began to ring. Because of my job and the severity of the work I dealt with at the FBI, turning my phone off or even on silent really wasn’t an option. I had to be available twenty-four-seven.

Dr. Peggy did not agree.

Secret, we’ve had this conversation.

And yet, Dolly Parton’s 9 to 5 was crooning through the leather walls of my purse, as if Miss Dolly herself was commanding me to answer. What a way to make a living, indeed.

I can’t help it.

You can, and you shouldn’t shift blame onto others.

I sighed and pulled my phone out of my bag. With Lucas and Desmond flanking me so closely, there was no way to avoid them seeing the caller ID. Unfortunately it wasn’t my unit leader Tyler Nowakowski calling, though I’d have given anything for that to be the case right about now.

Instead, Holden Chancery’s name and photo flashed on the screen.

Desmond sat back in his chair and propped his foot up on his knee. He smiled, but there was no warmth in it. We’re probably going to need an extra session next week.

Chapter Two

Iexcused myself from the room, leaving my husbands alone with our therapist so I could take a phone call from my former vampire lover. The lover part was former, not the vampire. As far as I knew I was the only person who had ever successfully shed their vampirism.

Holden, I answered, my tone cold.

Holden and I were still on good terms, in spite of how crushing our breakup had been. For a long time, I’d been torn between him and Desmond, each part of the monster in me finding its match in one of them. It had ultimately been Desmond I had chosen, and I knew the choice was right, but Holden would always be a part of my life.

I’d even let him kill me.

Yes, it is evident to me how much therapy I need, thank you.

Because I’d been one of the vampire Tribunal, a position that could only be relinquished by death, Holden had been able to claim my seat after I was no longer a vampire. This meant he was now one of the most powerful vampires on the East Coast, and while he didn’t lord that power over me, he often forgot that I no longer worked for the Tribunal.

I’d been their lackey, a bounty hunter who was at their beck and call. I hadn’t been that in a very long time, but Holden, and the Tribunal’s leader, Sig, tended to forget I wasn’t a DoorDash driver for vampire problem solving.

Secret, you’ve been avoiding me.

Yes, yes I have.

I specifically sent someone to you two weeks ago to tell you we needed to speak, and I’ve been waiting, and yet…

"It’s almost like I don’t respond well to people sending me minion telegrams. Almost like if you wanted something from me, you should have come yourself."

You know how busy I am.

I scoffed. Holden, you’re immortal. It would have taken you about fifteen minutes to come to my apartment and say, ‘Hey, Secret, I need a favor if you don’t mind.’

He was quiet for a long moment, so I spoke again. It’s almost like you forget that I’ve been where you are, and even when I was a Tribunal leader, I still managed to find time to stop a handful of near-apocalypse situations, rescue my dad, kill my mom, do my own grocery shopping. You know, typical girl boss things.

You didn’t buy groceries when you were with the Tribunal, he said finally.

The blood didn’t deliver itself, Holden.

He made a small sound that might have been a laugh, but it was gone so quickly he might have been clearing his throat.

Secret, we need your help.

We? So, this isn’t just a Holden call for help, it’s the whole lot of you? My tone was borderline sarcastic and went fully one hundred percent sarcasm when I said, Even Juan Carlos?

Now, I’ve had a few enemies in my time. The kind of people who, if we were all human, you could point to and say, That person most likely had something to do with her death. I’d had a long run of pissing off the wrong monsters, and as a result, there were a lot of folks who hated me.

Most of them were dead now.

Juan Carlos hated me as much, if not more, than every single one of those enemies. The third member of the Tribunal, he had relished giving me assignments that should have meant my certain death, and the only thing that had kept him from killing me himself was that Sig, the Tribunal’s leader, was, uh…very fond of me.

I still wasn’t sure if Sig’s fondness for me was romantic, or if he thought of me the way I thought of my cat, Rio, but he’d always gone out of his way to show me favoritism, even when it was to my detriment. Sig’s feelings for me, whatever they were, had put me in harm’s way more often than they’d protected me.

And Juan Carlos hated me because of it. It had taken me years to understand why, only to finally realize one day it was Juan Carlos’s own love for Sig, and the jealousy it created, that caused him to lash out at anyone else Sig cared for.

He saw me as beneath Sig’s notice, and it made him crazy that I was such a favorite.

Can we not do this right now? Holden asked. I wouldn’t call you if it wasn’t important.

Since I was also being an asshole for missing my therapy session, I didn’t push it any further. What do you need me for so badly?

I’d really rather do this in person.

I think you should just tell me, and then I’ll decide if I’m going to help you or not.

Again, he sighed. I have this effect on people who love me.

Calliope is missing.

My heart skipped a beat, and after a moment I had to take a seat in one of Dr. Peggy’s waiting room chairs. Are you sure?

Calliope wasn’t exactly the kind of woman—or perhaps being was more accurate—who could easily be traced by checking in on her at an apartment or calling her up on the phone. Cal was a half-fairy/half-god, which was about as unique as my former mishmash of half-vampire/half-werewolf. I’m not sure if that’s why she and I had gotten along so well, but I know she treated me with more love and tenderness in my early years in the city than just about anyone else I’d known.

Cal worked alongside the Tribunal to help them ease the transition for newbie vampires. She got blood for the baby vamps so there was no need to rely on blood banks and the vampires wouldn’t turn on unsuspecting humans at the height of their frenzied desire for a meal. That kept a lot of family members alive, and also used to sweep the vampire secret safely under the rug.

Even though humans knew about vampires now, services like those Cal offered went a long way toward protecting the vampire image with the public. Fewer attacks meant more trust. As much trust as humans could have in vampires, anyway.

The reason I asked Holden if he was sure Cal was missing was because she lived in an alternate dimension hidden inside a Starbucks near my old apartment.

Yes, a giant otherworld mansion that defied the laws of physics, and all you had to do was walk through the door of a Starbucks with a sense of urgency and need. No, a need for a good, strong espresso wouldn’t do it. Humans couldn’t get in by mistake. It was a gate meant only for vampires and other supernatural creatures.

But not werewolves.

I hadn’t seen Cal or her mansion in years. Not for lack of desire—I missed her terribly—but she was a creature who existed outside the tethers of normal time. She might miss me, but for a truly immortal being, five years’ absence was a blink of the eye.

As a human, I couldn’t cross into her world. Plus, I’d been living in Los Angeles for the past five years, only having returned to New York permanently after the Peru incident. And now? Well, I was a werewolf again, which made me lupus non grata in her home.

Cal didn’t hate werewolves like the vampires did, but our dual nature disagreed with the passage between one world and the next. It could wreak havoc on even the strongest alpha and force them into a shift with no full moon in sight.

She’d explained how it worked to me once, but to be totally honest we’d been in a life-or-death scenario and all I’d heard was this might be bad for Desmond. He’d managed it okay but had admitted afterwards he was in no great hurry to repeat the process.

Holden’s reply brought me back to the conversation at hand. We haven’t had any contact with her in almost three weeks. No one can get through into the lobby anymore. Regular deliveries continued for about a week, but those have now ceased, and as you can imagine we’re getting concerned.

I knew Cal wasn’t their only resource for blood, but she was a pretty major one.

No indication that she was planning to go anywhere? Who was the last person she talked to?

A young warden, Peregrine, who had taken in a new vampire a few weeks ago. He paused for a beat, waiting for me to make fun of the name. I didn’t tend to scoff at other weird names, considering my own ridiculous moniker, but under normal circumstances I might have given Peregrine a snort. As it was, I was too busy worrying about Cal to come back with any snark. If you would like to speak with her, I can arrange that.

Well now you’re just assuming I’m going to help you, I shot back.

Secret, Calliope is missing. One of the strongest, oldest, most powerful beings you’ve ever met has disappeared without a trace. I assume you’re going to help us, yes.

I rested my face in my open palm and let out a long sigh.

Holden, I’ve got a lot of personal shit going on right now.

When has that ever stopped you?

Chapter Three

Ihung up with Holden, promising him I would make my way to the Tribunal headquarters once I was finished with my current predicament: my marriage counseling.

But here I was causing even more trouble than before. As I sat between my two husbands—admittedly where my focus should be, because yikes, what a mess—I was thinking about Cal. Dr. Peggy’s voice had become a muffled background sound, like the teacher in a Charlie Brown cartoon.

Her voice lilted in a question, and suddenly I was brought back to the here and now.

Secret, are you paying attention? Dr. Peggy asked.

No, I admitted.

Lucas let out a groan of exasperation, and for the first time since we’d been in group therapy, he snapped. You have to be kidding me. We’re here, together, in this embarrassing and awkward situation, where I have to continue to say how sorry I am for messing up, and Desmond acts like it was some unforgivable offense, when really he’s just mad I bit you instead of him, and you’re getting distracted because of a phone call from your ex-boyfriend?

I stared at him, my breath caught in my throat.

Well, at least he admitted he’s not all that sorry about biting her, Desmond said to the doctor.

The watch on Dr. Peggy’s wrist made a small chime.

That’s all we have time for today. She sounded almost relieved. But I would like to see you all back here again on Friday. I think we have quite a bit more to discuss.

I’ll say, I replied quietly, wanting anything other than to get into what Lucas had just said.

Before I knew it, we were out on the sidewalk and the crush of pedestrian traffic made it difficult for us to get into anything relating to Lucas’s outburst in Dr. Peggy’s office. Desmond’s expression was cold, and he was looking anywhere but at Lucas. I really didn’t want to have to tell them I needed to leave to see Holden, but I did have to go. I wasn’t sure what we were dealing with, but with Cal missing, I wanted to figure out what was going on.

Instead of letting all this simmer to the point of explosion, I grabbed them both by the wrist and hauled them into a nearby alley, stepping out of the way of those walking by and giving us some pretense of privacy.

Unfortunately, the alley also smelled of the garbage from the falafel restaurant next door, and it had been an unusually hot day for fall.

Enough. I have work to do still, and I know you guys want to hash this out like normal adults, but we’re not getting anywhere up there. Lucas, you bit me and I’m a werewolf now. Fuck you.

It was an accident, he protested.

I mean, was it though? You were always possessive and a bit shitty about the werewolf stuff when we were together. You marked me as yours even though you knew Desmond and I were also bonded. You tricked me into marrying you in a werewolf ceremony I didn’t understand. I think you might believe biting me in Peru was an accident, but surely you can appreciate why I, and especially Desmond, would have a hard time believing you.

Lucas stared at us both with open-mouthed surprise, like he hadn’t been expecting to get called out on his actions. That was the thing about Lucas. He rarely believed that the things he did were wrong, which made it difficult to convince him he was responsible for the fallout of those actions.

When he’d been the King of the Eastern packs, before he died, everything he did was with the mindset of what was best for the pack. It didn’t matter whose trust he betrayed or who he hurt, as long as it either protected or benefited his pack.

It made him an incredible king but an absolutely terrible husband.

I swear it wasn’t intentional. We were in the heat of the battle. I was trying to protect you.

I know, Lucas. I know. But I think if you’re being honest with yourself, and with us, part of you is glad you did it.

Lucas looked from me to Desmond. "Well, didn’t you spend years trying to convince her to become a wolf again?"

Desmond massaged the bridge of his nose and let out an exhausted sigh. "That was supposed to be her choice though. She wanted to be human, a normal human, for a while, and sure, I didn’t like the danger she was constantly putting herself in, but I wasn’t going to force her to take on the change against her will."

"And if I’d made the decision for myself, I’d have let Desmond be the one to bite me, and I think you know that," I said finally. There was no anger in my tone anymore. I was just tired of having this fight, tired of Lucas not admitting to his part in this. I was tired.

The stink of the back alley was lurid, almost colorful with my new werewolf senses. I wanted to wrap this up so we could all get on with our evening.

I’m sorry, Lucas said at last, and this time he didn’t follow it up with justifications or excuses. "I really am. I know my being back has been difficult for everyone, and I didn’t want to add more to that by causing this new friction. It was an accident, but you’re right. I’m not sorry Secret is a werewolf again. It means the pack will accept her more willingly, and that in turn is going to make it easier for Desmond to lead."

I wanted to remind him I was, by blood, a princess of the Southern wolf packs, and whether or not I’d been turned, my title should grant me a certain amount of respect from the other wolves. Not to mention my hard-earned status as pack protector, from the dozens of times I’d helped the Eastern wolves even before I was married to one.

I bit my tongue. When it all came down to it, he was right. The pack would respect me more now that I was truly one of them. Which led me to my next point. I turned towards Desmond. And you.

Me?

"Can you admit that in spite of it being Lucas who bit me, you are