Twisted: Drawn Series, #3

By M.A. Stone

What do you do when your girlfriends keep kicking you out and calling you a freak? Matt Gable is used to being the outsider in every situation. His family is the most dysfunctional he’s ever met. His mother tried to kill him when he was younger and the girl he talks to online, won’t even tell him her name. All he wants is to work at the tattoo shop he loves, get closer to his father and find “the one”. Is that so hard to ask for?

Mary Amanda aka Mandy has raised her nephew Levi ever since she was 18, working sometimes three jobs to support them, while her older brother was in jail. She moved closer to her brother and is working at Insatiable Ink and Cycles. Levi is now almost fourteen and wants to live with his dad, her brother, also known as Chainsaw, the VP for the Diablo Demons. With an “empty” nest looming, her brother decides she needs to date. The only problem is, there are two men she is attracted to and she can’t choose. Maybe she can have them both??

Beau Drawn has returned home to the family he neglected so many years ago. Controlled, driven and very self-assured, coming home has brought him to his knees. He was running from his past and didn’t know how empty his life was without his crazy family. Now all he wants to do is get closer to his father and his siblings, but on his terms. While re-discovering the family that he left ,he didn’t plan on falling for the one girl he’s not sure he can ever have.

WARNING: Contains mature sexual scenes including M/F/M scenes and sensitive sexual topics. Not recommended for those under the age of 18. 

• Language: English
• Publisher: M.A. Stone
• Release date: Dec 29, 2016
• ISBN: 9781386779391

Book preview

Twisted: A Drawn Series Novel

By. M. A. Stone

"You may wonder if the stars are fire,

You may wonder if the sun moves across the sky.

You may wonder if the truth is a liar,

But never wonder if I love."

Hamlet ~ William Shakespeare

Prologue- Beau

––––––––

"Round and round the circle...put the penny there...one step...two step...tickle under there!" My mom sang to me as she tickled me under my arm. I giggled and squirmed away from her, rubbing at the palm of my hand where her fingers had been. She laughed her tinkling laugh and pulled me into a hug. Her long blonde hair tickled my arm and she smelled like oranges.

I love you, Fish, she said as she kissed my head. She sighed and I felt all warm inside. She touched my face.

Love you too, Mama, I replied, looking up into her blue eyes that looked just like mine. The sun was shining behind her and it caught her blonde hair. I reached up and grabbed a strand of it, which made her laugh.

You are my favorite eight year old, you know that? she said to me with a smile.

But what about Axel and Bleu, Mama? I asked. She smiled again.

They are my favorite five-year-olds, she replied.

And I’m your Fish? I asked. She nodded and squeezed me again.

Yes, Beau, you are my Angel Fish, she replied as she held me in her arms tight and warm.

Jolting up off my bed, I put a hand to my heaving chest and ran a hand through my hair. I punched my pillow angrily and cursed under my breath. I knew right then and there I wasn’t going back to sleep and it made my frustration grow. Then my pager went off. I slid it off my dresser toward me and saw that it was the hospital. I had never been more relieved to be called into work.

Thank all the fucks in the world, I muttered as I leaned back. I grabbed my cell phone and called the hospital, telling them I’d be there as soon as I could. I looked at all the boxes in my living room. Two days and I was moving back home. Back to Jasper Falls. Back to where my family still lived. How long was I going to be able to avoid them? I walked to the bathroom, climbed in the shower and turned on the spray. I cleaned myself off, got dressed and was out the door with my keys in my hand.

I climbed into my car and smiled to myself. Family? Heh, they were all the way across the country, where I wanted them to be. Friends, just a few really. Okay, one. And his mama. My car, she was my baby. A sweet ride, yes. Carolina was a midnight blue Audi A-5 and tonight her top was down and we were cruising to the hospital. The air was heavy and settled against my bare skin as we skirted the highway. I retrieved my card from the visor and scanned into the employee parking lot. Quickly finding a space, I grabbed my messenger bag and my lab coat. I rushed into the hospital to see my patient, who was crowning, according to the message on my pager. I was met with Tabetha in the locker room. She was the chief of obstetrics and someone I’d been trying to avoid for a solid week. She stood in front of me in her white lab coat, stethoscope around her neck and nothing else. She was in her late thirties, with long black hair and a tight, toned body from spending her off time at the gym. I knew this because I’d been fucking her for the past six months. Until she tried to trap me with a pregnancy scare. She practically purred like a cat in heat as she stood before me and I held back from rolling my eyes like a teenager.

"I have a delivery, Dr. Thompson. I can’t do this with you right now. Especially not right now," I said in a clipped voice. She shook her head and ran a long finger down the front of my polo shirt, making my stomach clench. She had no idea how much I loathed her after what she did. I watched her fingers and shook my head.

There isn’t a delivery, is there? I asked, my anger rising. She smiled coyly and shook her head. I grabbed her wrist as she attempted to unbutton my shirt and looked into her brown eyes with all the dislike I could muster, which wasn’t hard. She disgusted me.

"I’m not doing this with you. We’re nothing to one another. I don’t appreciate being lied to. And I certainly don’t appreciate conniving women and their machinations on my future, Tabetha," I spat out. She frowned, trying to look cute. She succeeded in looking ridiculous. Leaning forward, she tried to kiss me. I grabbed her shoulders and pushed her against the wall. Tabetha’s eyes widened and then a slow smile spread across her lips. Time she was brought down a peg or two. I yanked open her lab coat and stared down at her surgically enhanced breasts. Tabetha smiled again but my expression caused that smile to disappear. She’d never seen this side of me. I’d tried to be a different man with her, but she was going to see the real me. Grabbing her breasts, I squeezed them hard, pinching her nipples between my thumbs and index fingers. Tabetha yelped, looking at me with fear and a little bit of lust in her eyes. Game on, Tabetha. She opened her mouth to say something, her eyes once again filled with arrogance and superiority.

"Don’t fucking talk, don’t say a word or I’ll gag you. Do you understand, Tabetha?" I asked, spitting out her name like it was a curse word. She nodded slowly, unease in her eyes. Pressing my body against hers, I fought with myself. Do I turn her on and walk away or push her all the way, to her very limits? Part of me wanted to break her and make her fall on her knees before me. It had nothing to do with being dominant and everything to do with repaying her cruelty and manipulation with some of my own. I wanted to hurt her because she’d done it to me. She was panting and whimpering and I snapped out of my reverie to look at her. Cupping a breast in my palm, I pinched the nipple hard and she made a noise in her throat. Despite my disgust, my dick was hard and I knew that I couldn’t sink to her level. I couldn’t be cruel, but I could get off. Reaching down, I parted her soaked pussy and dipped a finger inside. She was fucking soaking, even though I’d scared her. Putting my hand on her throat to hold her back, I rubbed her clit with the pad of my thumb. Her hips moved with the motion of my finger and when she moaned, I pinched her clit hard.

"One fucking sound, I warned you. You’re such a fucking slut, soaking my fingers...moaning like a goddamned whore. You don’t get to cum until I tell you, do you understand?" I hissed against her cheek. Tabetha’s breath hitched and she nodded. Squeezing her clit once more between my index finger and thumb, I let my hold on her throat loosen as I yanked down my scrub pants and boxer briefs. Fisting my erection in my hand, I stroked it up and down, switching out hands so that I could cover my shaft in her wetness. Reaching into my messenger bag, I pulled out a condom.

Rub your fucking pussy while I put this condom on, I told her sternly. She nodded and I watched as her long, manicured fingers stroked her clit, soft and hesitant.

"Come on, Tabetha, do it like I was. I know you fucking liked it that way," I said, making her flinch. She nodded again and started to pinch and rub her swollen clit, parting her glistening lips with each stroke. I slid the condom on my dick, stroking it a bit after. Facing her, I pushed her hand to the side and pressed her up against the locker once more. Staring into her face, I made sure to wipe all emotion off mine.

I’m going to fuck you here and now. Not a fucking word or sound comes out of that mouth. Do you understand? I asked. She nodded.

Good, I said, more to myself than to her. Grabbing her left leg, I wrapped it around my waist as I positioned myself at her greedy entrance. Hard and fast, making her lipsticked mouth fall open, I lunged into her hot, wet slit. Again and again, I pounded into her, making the lockers creak. The sound of flesh slapping flesh filled the small room. I stilled for a moment and, smiling, grabbed her. I spun her around so her back was to me.

Bend over and grab the bench, I told her, referring to the wooden benches that sat between the lockers. She nodded and did so, her tight ass in the air. Grabbing her hips, I slid my dick home quick and fast, making her jerk forward. Tabetha tightened her grip on the bench as I rammed into her repeatedly. Her pussy was warm and wet, which would be enough to make me cum. I wrapped her long hair around my fist and jerked her head back as I railed into her over and over like I was angry and trying to fuck all the hate and pain away. Feeling the familiar tightening in my lower back, I knew I was going to cum hard. I deepened my thrusts and I was surprised she wasn’t crying out. Her pussy clenched around my dick and I was done for. With a loud groan, I spilled into her and slowed my thrusts. Her pussy tight around me now, I slid in and out a few more times then stopped. She looked back at me, her eyes confused and wary. With a smirk, I smacked her ass and pulled out. Tying up the used condom, I tossed it into a metal wastebasket next to me. Sitting up, she brushed her hair out of her face, as her chest rose and fell rapidly.  Tugging up my scrub pants, I tied the laces at the waist. I looked down at her and shook my head. She went to say something, apparently thinking I was playing a game. She looked broken and opened her mouth to speak. I held up my hand to stop her from speaking, something I couldn’t bear right now. I was still angry and I needed to get the hell away from her.

Thanks, I said tersely and walked out of the locker room. So much for working two weeks before I moved. I was done with this place and its plastic people. Time to go see the family.

Chapter One –Beau Drawn

Ever since I’d returned to Jasper Falls, it was the same routine. I’d go to work at Jasper Falls General, the same hospital my mom had worked at. Then after my shift, I’d grab something quick to eat or drink a pre-workout shake. Then it was either go to the gym or hit the streets for a run. The gym near the hospital was nice and big, with tons of equipment, but there were days that I preferred to run. Hell, I’d been running ever since the day I’d turned 18; the day I ran away from Jasper Falls. And I don’t mean the kind that required sneakers.

Usually I’d run the trails of the state park near my apartment, but one night I’d decided to run near the river. Squat little townhouses with huge bay windows,bordered the waterfront. The windows were oversized and covered the second floor of the building. All but one had their curtains drawn tight. It was that one that caught my attention. I thought it was odd that someone was so trusting, to just leave their curtains open, letting the world in. I told myself that the next time I was out for a run, I had to look in. I had to see who lived with such reckless abandon. Rules were key in my life and I was always curious to meet people who lived opposite that philosophy. Whomever lived there, they didn’t seem to mind if the whole city could see into their living room. So the next time I ran that way, I looked again and I can say that I definitely wasn’t disappointed. A tall woman was standing in the middle of the room, earbuds in her ears, wearing tiny black shorts and an orange tank top. She was dancing and singing, head thrown back, eyes closed. She was so sexy, not like the plastic women I’d been surrounded by in California. Curly blonde hair that reached to her shoulders and pale skin. She was curvy with thick thighs and an ample chest. And even though she couldn’t dance for shit, the expression on her face fascinated me. She was so relaxed and happy. I stopped running and just looked up at her, my chest heaving as I caught my breath. I couldn’t help myself as I watched her wiggle and shake. Like one of those idiots in those stupid music videos, I stood underneath her window, the back of my shirt stuck to me from sweat, looking up at her like a creeper. If she opened her eyes and looked down, she would see me there looking up at her. She would see me staring at her plump, heart-shaped ass and thick thighs. This woman was perfect. The thing is, I hated skinny women. Wait, hate is a strong word. Let me rephrase that, I could fuck skinny girls, but I preferred women with curves: tits, ass, and thick, strong thighs. This mystery woman fit that perfectly. Shaking my head to clear my immature teenaged thoughts, I laughed to myself.

"Dude, take a picture," said a young, male voice. I turned to see a tall, scrawny, teenaged boy with spiky blonde hair leaning against the building that I was currently looking up into. He was smoking a cigarette and he eyed me with a furious expression on his face. We stared at one another, unblinking for a few minutes.

Excuse me? I asked, my voice cold and distant. He snorted and shook his head as his blue eyes flashed.

Don’t use your ‘big boy’ voice on me, Yankee, he replied, the southern twang now evident in his voice. He wasn’t someone who was going to be easily intimidated and he probably knew her.

––––––––

"Whatever. Aren’t you a little young to be smoking?" I asked as I pointed to the lit cigarette between his fingers. He frowned and crossed his arms over his chest. He was wearing a black hooded sweatshirt and artfully distressed jeans.

"Aren’t you a little old to be staring up into people’s windows?" he shot back.

I bit back a smile. Maybe. But no one ever died from looking into someone’s window...cigarettes on the other hand...., I replied.

His brow furrowed. "Keep looking at her and you can be the first Peepin’ Tom casualty," he growled.

I laughed at that. The kid had balls. "Why? Is she your girlfriend?" I asked.

He made a disgusted sound. "No! She’s my aunt," he spat out. That was a different story altogether.

Really? I asked brightly. He nodded, giving me a suspicious look. I held up my hands in surrender. Listen, I have a sister. I didn’t mean anything by looking. I happen to jog by here every night and I just happened to notice she was dancing, I replied, my voice even.

His frown disappeared. He pushed off the wall and sighed in frustration, running a hand through his blonde hair. I told her to close the damn curtains at night. She won’t listen. She likes the view, he muttered before turning and going inside.  I watched him leave and then looked up at the window. She had stopped dancing and was staring down at me, one hand on her hip. She was frowning a bit. I waved before turning and running back home.

When I got back to my apartment that night, I called my friend Dori. Back in California, she worked as a paralegal, while she went to college part time. After leaving Jasper Falls, I’d stayed with her family in Sacramento. Her brother, Kevin, and I had met in an online gaming chat room our senior year of high school. We were both shit talkers as teenagers and we became best friends. Kevin was like a brother to me and I could talk to him about anything. Dori and I had a similar relationship. When I called, Kevin answered and told me that Dori was on a date. Kevin was a psychiatrist for a rehab facility and kept odd hours. I told him what’d happened with my coworker, Tabetha, before I left and then the one I saw in the window tonight. Kevin was quiet for a bit, weighing all of his words carefully. Typical Kevin.

"Beau, is there anything that you love about women? Wait, let me back up...is there anything you like about women?" Kevin asked.

Drumming my fingers on my knee, I thought for a second. Kevin sighed into the phone, making me sigh in frustration. I knew my time was up. Love? Kev, that’s a tough one,man. You know there are only five women that I love, I replied in a clipped voice.

And they are? he asked impatiently. I laughed softly.

Bleu, my mom, my Aunt Almeida, my Gran and, of course, your sister, I replied.

He chuckled. Family doesn’t count when we talk about women, dude, he replied.

I rolled my eyes. A move like that would’ve earned me a whack in the head from his mom. "Okay fine. Things I love about women....things I love about women? Can I get back to you on this one?" I asked.

This time, he actually groaned in frustration. "No! Answer the question, asshole. Stop playing around with your stoic, hands-off, super control shit. You’re a fucking control freak! I know you like to be dominant in the bedroom, but I’m not one of your Barbie doll fuck buddies, so knock it off," he said evenly, but with anger in his voice,despite the cursing.

Fine! I love the way they smell. I love how they’re vulnerable when they’re asleep. All of their preconceived ideas and sterotypes are gone and they just lie there like angels, I admitted.

Okay. Anything else? he asked, his voice sounding a bit over eager. I was starting to feeling like my best friend was psychoanazlyzing me and I decided to give him a bit more than he bargained for, the asshole.

Yeah. I especially like it when they’re down on their knees, sucking on my balls and stroking my dick, while I have them blindfolded, I replied.

He coughed and then choked on the other end. I decided to continue, a smile playing on my lips. Served him right for using psychiatrist shit on me. I wasn’t his case study. I love it when they lower their drenched pussies onto my lips,their hands are tied behind their backs and all they can do is ride my tongue. I love it when they cum and I love it when they leave. And Kevin, I really love it when they’re silent and don’t say a fucking word, I bit the last part out with acid in my voice.

Kevin was silent on the other end. You are one fucked up dude, he replied.

I laughed, but there was no joy in it. "You have no fucking idea," I replied.

He cleared his throat and then coughed. So... you stared up in the window like a pervert? he asked as he changed the subject.

I ran a hand through my sweaty hair and sighed into the phone, grateful for the change. More like a creeper, but, yeah, afraid so, I replied.

He laughed. What happened? he teased and then laughed again.

I sat down on my sofa and put my feet up on my glass coffee table. Every damn night, I run by her house, I replied.

Yeah, you said that earlier. Why was tonight different? he asked.

––––––––

Sighing, I ran a hand over my head. Apparently, she lives there with her teenaged nephew, you know the one who caught me peeping? He told me where to go and accused me of being a pervert, I told him. Kevin chuckled, which the morphed into full-on laughter so loud, that I’d had to pull my phone away from my ear. I honestly didn’t think it was that funny. You done? Enjoying yourself? I asked, a little more than irritated.

He laughed again. "Not hardly. Man, I would’ve given anything to have seen that kid tell you off! Look on the bright side, at least you didn’t have your dick out, watching her," he said dryly.

I laughed loudly at that visual. "The kid would’ve needed therapy if he saw that," I replied evenly.

He laughed into the phone. Damn straight he would’ve. Something that small, he joked.

"Why do you have to talk shit about my dick?" I said, feeling a grin stretch across my face.

You got any black people in that town? he asked abruptly. Kevin was a five foot seven black man who bore an eerie resemblance to Tyrese Gibson, but with a voice like John Coffee from the Green Mile.

Yes, we do. Why? Are you planning on moving here, Dr. Kevin? I asked.

He chuckled. You never know where I’ll turn up, Beau, he said. I shook my head and smiled, knowing the truth in that statement. Have you talked to your family since that night at the hospital? he asked.

I ran a hand through my hair and let out my breath. Yeah, I guess, I replied.

"What do you mean, you guess? Have you actually sat down and had a conversation with them? Told them why you left and all that horseshit?" he asked.

"No, Kevin. I’m not good with feelings and being open, it only leads to someone being the vulnerable one and that makes it easier for people to walk all over you. And besides, who says they’ll even listen?" I asked.

He groaned on his end of the phone and I geared myself for another lecture from him. Kevin was good at giving lectures and liked to hear himself talk. If he ever got married, his poor wife would lose every argument. She’d either fall asleep or she just wouldn’t be able to take listening to him drone on and on. You need someone to come up there and kick some sense into your ass, he snapped.

Are you offering? Because I remember someone trying that once and getting his ass handed to him, I shot back.

Whatever, he muttered. And then he hung up. For fucks sake! He always did that shit, hanging up when someone was still talking to him. It drove me nuts! Plugging my phone into the charger, I sat back on the couch. Grabbing the remote control, I switched on the TV and looked for something to watch.

"Round and round the circle...put the penny there...one step...two step...tickle under there!" My mom sang to me as she tickled me under my arm. Giggling, I squirmed away from her, rubbing at the palm of my hand where her fingers had been. Running down the sidewalk, I looked back to see her running after me, her long blonde hair fanning out behind her like a golden curtain; the sunlight catching it.

Wait for me, Fish. Mama is an old lady, she teased, her musical laugh reaching my ears. Giggling again, I ran faster and then tripped over a crack in the sidewalk. Sharp, crisscrossed pain hit my left knee and I sat down, tears already forming in my eyes. I felt my mom and then smelled her. Mama has you, Fish. Mama always has you, she soothed as she took me in her arms. Resting my head against her chest, I whimpered softly as she took care of me.

I woke up on the couch, in the dark. Rubbing at my eyes, I swore I could still smell my mom’s perfume in the room. My chest ached; I missed her so much. Standing up, I grabbed my car keys. There were only three people in this world who knew what I was going through and were close enough that I could talk to them. I wasn’t expecting some Hallmark moment, but it was worth a shot. Shutting my apartment door, I walked down the stairs to my car and climbed inside. It was time to go talk to my family. Or at least one member of my family.

Pulling up to my brother Axel’s house, I wondered what in the hell had possessed me to drive there. I was surprised to see, that for ten o’clock at night, the lights were all on and there were a few cars in front. I pulled in behind a black truck and killed the engine on my car. Shutting the door quietly, I walked up the driveway. Shouting was heard from inside and I considered getting back into my car and going home. I really wasn’t in the mood for a crowd of people. Not tonight.

"Motherfucker! Are you serious??? I heard a deep voice yell. Walking quickly, I knocked on the door. The door was flung open and I could hear music playing inside, but not anything that I recognized. Matt, my older half-brother, stood there. He had a red bandanna on his head and looked at me for a minute, his dark blue eyes studying me. He was insanely tall, like 6’7 and he raised an eyebrow while he looked down at me.

You coming in or are you going to stand there and eye fuck me? he asked with a grin in his insanely deep voice. Axel peeked over his shoulder and smiled. Axel was about six foot and he was wearing a Spiderman ski hat. I started to reconsider coming to this house, it looked like a circus.

Matt, stop being a dick and let him in, replied Axel. I smiled to Axel in thanks while pushing past Matt. Shutting the door behind me, Matt took a seat at Axel’s dining room table, laptop in front of him. There were drawings and paperwork all over the table, along with romance novels. Wait, romance novels?? Axel cleared his throat and I looked at my younger brother. You want something to drink? asked Axel.

I nodded. Water? I asked. Axel nodded and walked off toward the kitchen.

Stop looking so nervous and sit down, mumbled Matt, even though his back was to me.

I took a chair next to him and he nodded in acknowledgment. "I’m not nervous. This whole situation is... bizarre. Axel is wearing a kids’ ski hat, there are romance novels all over the table. And I don’t do well with describing my feelings or anything like that," I responded.

Matt looked at me and his eyes reminded me of someone, someone who, to this day, scared the shit out of me. "Yeah, I know," he replied, as if he was reading my mind.

"Know what?" I asked. I needed to stop being so defensive! I ran a hand through my hair in frustration.

"My eyes. I look like her," he replied.

My mouth went dry. Your mom, right? I asked, my voice soft.

He nodded, his lips a thin line, a grim expression on his face. "Yeah, that’s who we’re both thinking of. But Beau, she wasn’t my mom. She was just some unhinged psycho who gave birth to me," he spat out.

I nodded in understanding.  Matt turned his gaze back to his laptop. What’re you doing? I asked.

He smiled and shook his head ruefully. Looking for a date, he replied honestly. I laughed.

Axel came back with my Coke and handed it to me. He sat on the other side of Matt and studied me. Why are you here? asked Axel. Matt snorted and shook his head. Axel’s manners hadn’t improved in all the years I’d been gone, that’s for sure.

"Axel Harrison Drawn, hush your mouth and mind your damn manners!" called a scratchy but loud female voice. I looked behind me, as a tall woman with a pure white beehive hairdo, came barreling into the dining room. She was wearing a pink bathrobe and her hair was completely wrapped in toilet paper. I’d recognize that hairdo anywhere.

Gran? I muttered with a chuckle as I stood up.

Gran smiled as she looked up at me before grabbing me and pulling me against her ample chest. The woman still smelled like sugar cookies. "Fish!" she whispered. She hugged me tight and nearly took all the breath out of me.

Fish? asked Axel and Matt in unison.

Gran let me go, looked at me briefly and then pushed me into my seat. Hands on her hips, she focused her gaze on my brothers. "You," she said pointing to Axel, "You’re wearing on my last nerve, Axel Drawn. First, that drawer of sin in your room, then you letting that baby wear short pants to school when she had perfectly good slacks that I made her! And now, you’re being rude to your older brother! Axel’s face turned red and Matt chuckled. Matt quickly turned his laugh into a cough when Gran turned her gaze on him. You aren’t one to laugh either, mister," she told Matt.

He nodded solemnly. Yes...yes, ma’am, he mumbled.

"I have missed you, boy," she whispered fiercely, hugging me so tight she nearly took my breath away. Pulling back. She cupped my face with one of her rough hands, smiling.

I missed you too, Gran, I replied, wanting to say more to her, but not wanting to break down in front of her and my brothers.

Gran frowned and whacked me upside the head. Hard. Then why in the name of Marlon Brando did you up and leave? No letter? No nothing! If I wasn’t close to ninety, Beau Aaron Drawn, I’d make you get a switch and I’d tan your hide! she yelled. Axel and Matt grinned and covered their mouths with their hands quickly.

Yes...yes, ma’am. I’m sorry? I replied. She nodded and left the room, hands still on her hips. That woman was still as formidable as she was when I was a child.

Welcome home, brother, laughed Axel with a shake of his head.

So I take it she lives here? I asked.

Axel nodded. Yeah, she watches my daughter, Harley, when I have to work nights. And, she was kicked out of a bunch of nursing homes, so Dad brought her here, he replied.

I sipped my Coke and didn’t say anything for a minute. "Wait, did you say she was kicked out of nursing homes? I asked. Axel nodded slowly and grinned. Kicked out for what?" I asked.

Matt snickered. Hmmm, let’s see...sexual harassment, assault, theft, bodily harm to a nurse, rattled off Matt. Axel sighed and ran a hand over his head.

Seriously? I asked, still pretty shocked at what they were telling me about my great-grandmother.

Yeah, seriously. She’s a pistol. Hey, why did she call you Fish? asked Matt. Axel smiled sadly.

It was a nickname my mom gave me when I was a baby. Gran used to call our Mom, Angel Fish. And it got passed onto me, I explained.

What was yours, Axel? asked Matt. Axel blushed and I smiled remembering what our mother called him.

Pigeon, he mumbled.

Matt raised an eyebrow. "Say what?" asked Matt with a laugh.

Axel frowned and crossed his arms over his chest. She called me Pigeon, alright? he spat. I laughed, the pain in my chest easing up a bit.

Uh why? asked Matt, looking at Axel out of the corner of his eye.

When he’d cry, he sounded like a cooing pigeon, I said, remembering it all of a sudden.

Axel smiled at me in understanding. What was Bleu’s? Do you remember? asked Axel.

I took another sip of my Coke and thought for a second. Bleubell. She called her that, especially when Bleu was having a tantrum, I replied. Axel nodded.

Bleu? A tantrum? asked a shocked Matt. Axel and I both nodded.

Oh yeah. She was a real neat freak and would flip out when Axel would go in her room. He would purposely move stuff just to see if she noticed, I replied with a laugh, remembering all the crazy stuff Axel would do to get her all riled up. Matt shook his head and removed his bandanna. He had long black, curly hair that reached to his chin. Scratching his head, he looked down to his laptop. I nodded my head in Matt’s direction. He’s looking for a date? I asked Axel.

He nodded grimly. "You would think a stud like him, wouldn’t have a problem, right? Well, our brother here has very specific tastes," said Axel, rolling his eyes dramatically. Matt flipped him off and then went back to typing.

Care to define your specific tastes, Matt? I asked.

Matt sighed and faced us. "Seeing as how you chatty bitches aren’t going to leave the subject alone, I’ll explain. I want a different kind of relationship," explained Matt. I nodded. I respected his privacy.

Axel obviously didn’t. You want one chick and another dude! he yelled throwing his hands in the air. I spit Coke out on the table and Matt shielded his laptop. Axel bounced on his heels, hyper as hell. What? asked Axel, as I shot a frown his way. Axel grabbed a napkin and mopped up the soda from the table top.

You should probably warn someone before you say shocking shit like that, muttered Matt.

I wiped off my mouth with a napkin from the holder in the middle of the table. You’re gay? I asked.

Matt groaned and dropped his head in his hands. No, Beau. See, Axel, our retarded brother, who I think was dropped on his head numerous times, explained it wrong, said Matt. Axel sat back down and leaned back in his chair, glaring at Matt.

"I, want a relationship with a guy and a girl, yes. But no, I’m not gay. I want a relationship where the gentleman and I, in question, share the woman. Often at the same time," he explained.

Like a polyamorous relationship? I asked.

He nodded. "Yes and no. We would be fucking her, not one another," he replied.

Honestly, that doesn’t sound half bad, I replied.

Matt grinned and Axel’s jaw dropped. "Seriously? You’re down with that shit?" screeched Axel.

If he only knew the things that turned me on and interested me. "Axel, all I said was that it doesn’t sound half bad. You are seriously high strung for a man approaching twenty-five," I replied.

Axel frowned, shook his head and stood up. I have to go check on Harley. I’ll be right back, he murmured as he walked upstairs.

Matt grinned. "Okay, Beau, he’s gone. Why’d you really come here tonight?" he asked as he closed his laptop and spun to face me.

What do you mean? I asked, attempting to evade the question entirely.

Matt shook his head and tapped the table with his fingers. "Listen, I’m neither blind nor stupid. I’ve been involved in this family for a minute or two and I know how this feels. You know, to belong to a family. But the thing is, you avoided them, for years. Then moved back home, right. But, you weren’t busting down anyone’s door to get all Walton family with them again. So honestly, what’s the deal, Beau?" he asked, his voice low and serious. Matt didn’t mess around.

Wow, you seriously go straight to the point, don’t you? I remarked.

I don’t beat around the bush, Beau. I don’t have time to. So, be straight with me, he said.

Nodding, I took a deep breath. "I’m all about control, Matt. I have to have control. Believe me, I didn’t want to leave. I had to. But now, this all feels surreal. Like it’s all going to explode any minute and then it’ll all be wrong again. Does that make sense?" I ask.

He nodded. Of course it does. Listen, I have an appointment, but we should talk soon. I think you and I, we’re more alike than you realize, he said.

Matt picked up his laptop and slid it into his messenger bag. Tell Axel I said goodbye, he said as he patted me on the shoulder and headed out the front door.

Sitting there alone, I felt like a jackass. I couldn’t even explain to Matt why I’d left. It’d kill him and probably destroy my entire family.

My head snapped up as Axel walked back into the room, carrying my sleepy niece. Harley was curled against his chest, her thumb in her mouth. She looked up when she saw me. Who dat? she asked in her husky baby voice.

Axel sat down in the chair and rubbed her back over the fabric of her brightly colored pajamas. That’s your Uncle Beau, he said softly. Axel may look like a pierced Peter Pan, but he was different when he had his daughter in his arms.

She smiled at me, dimples showing at the corners of her mouth. Looking up at Axel, she sighed. Do Daddy, she whispered.

He nodded, smiled and kissed her cheek. Re-positioning her, he leaned her back against his chest and Harley held out a chubby fist. Opening her fist, he took his index finger and made a circular motion with it into the palm of her hand. Round and round the circle...put the penny there...one step, two step...tickle under there! he sang softly as he tiptoed his fingers up her arm and tickled her close to her armpit. Harley squealed and laughed loudly.

My heart ached and I must’ve made a sound because Axel looked up.