Fearfully and Wonderfully Made

By Tina Marie

Taking God and Christianity seriously.

In a culture where there are few if any absolutes, this book encourages you, the reader, to face your demons, understand your own story, and embrace the incredible gift of grace. The author takes a deep dive into her own identity and shares the many ways the tapestry of her life has been influenced by

• Language: English
• Publisher: Trilogy Christian Publishing
• Release date: Nov 28, 2022
• ISBN: 9798887381503

Tina Marie

Tina Marie is a mother of twin girls, Brittany and Abbey who are now in college. She was the owner of her own interior design firm for 22 years and now retired. Tina Marie told stories about Isabella when her girls were six years old on their road trips. Her girls were fascinated with Isabella's character and all she did. She decided to put the stories she told her girls in a book so other children could learn about Isabella and the fun things she does and learn at the age of five. Her girls still remember the stories she told, now they can read them to their children.

Book preview

Acknowledgments

So many wonderful people helped me with this intense process. Mentioning their names on this page will never come close to expressing my gratitude for their time, energy, feedback, and support. The first guy to read my rough draft, Travis; wow, did you have to peel through a mess to see the story! Thank you! My husband, Jim, who has had to put up with me throughout the entire process, you are awesome! Tina’s friendship is a gift from God. She was involved in this endeavor before it became a thing. Then to Jen, Susie, Marv, Linda, Marcia, Karla, Lynette, and Terry, I simply say how very blessed I am to have such incredible friends. Your input has meant more than I’m sure you know.

Table of Contents

Foreword

Introduction

Chapter 1

Memories, Recollections, and Tall Tales

Chapter 2

It’s Not about Me

Chapter 3

An Only Child with Four Brothers and Sisters

Chapter 4

I’m Not a Robot

Chapter 5

Here Come the Kids

Chapter 6

When Will I Ever Learn

Chapter 7

Music Therapy

Chapter 8

Looking for Demons in All the Wrong Places

Chapter 9

How Quickly Things Can Change

Chapter 10

Grandparents, or the Lack Thereof

Chapter 11

Me and My Friend Marvin

Chapter 12

They All Moved On

Chapter 13

Lonely Living

Chapter 14

Playmates

Chapter 15

Junior Executive

Chapter 16

Change of Plans

Chapter 17

The Caring Chameleon—Angel Mode

Chapter 18

The Perfect Storm (During Ages 16–25)

Chapter 19

You’re Hired (18–25)

Chapter 20

Just Keep Praying

Chapter 21

Step of Faith

Chapter 22

Mom’s Twelve-Year Health Decline

Chapter 23

Why April

Chapter 24

Operating in the Black

Chapter 25

My One Regret

Chapter 26

Madly in Like (32–35 Years Old)

Chapter 27

29 Months as a Displaced Worker

Chapter 28

It’s Just Too Much

Chapter 29

They’re Finally Hiring!

Chapter 30

Online Shopping

Chapter 31

The Perfect Proposal

Chapter 32

Some Secrets Are Fun

Chapter 33

Keeping It Light

Chapter 34

He Never Gave Up

Chapter 35

Last Ditch Effort

Chapter 36

My Final Chapter, So I Thought

Chapter 37

But Wait, There’s More

Postscript

Foreword

It has been such a privilege to share in the pages of this book, from its mere twinkle in the eye of Tina Marie to the unfolding of print on paper. I remember being asked by Tina Marie, during a very tumultuous time in her life (as you will discover as you read), if she could become a counseling client of mine. Because we were in a small group together from church, and ethics as they are, I instead suggested, Let’s get together as friends over coffee. And so, we did.

Over the next many years, during these conversations over coffee, we’ve often joked about how her life needed to be a novel or movie. And so it is! Tina Marie so bravely and eloquently invites you into the pages of her experiences—the pain, sorrow, and joys. Her story is interwoven with scriptures that have been her comfort, guide, and passion. This book is a perfect reflection of what it means to live a life on a mission. Of how to allow God to use the ordinary and extraordinary, the very best and imperfection of humanity, all to reveal His goodness, and to glorify His redemptive work in our lives, if we allow Him.

Tina Marie’s desire to bring glory to God and share the Good News of Christ is evident in her life’s story. I invite you to open these pages and enter into a story that you and I can relate to—disappointments, sorrows, triumphs, redemption, and joy in the journey. May you be inspired and encouraged as you do!

—Tina W. MA, LPC

Introduction

I am so glad that I took the opportunity to give my life to Jesus at the tender age of five years old. If I hadn’t, I can only speculate that I would have been dead long ago and would have lived a horrible, miserable life up until my last day.

My sin nature, the nature humans inherit right from the beginning, is prone to revenge. Had I fed that nature rather than the new nature given to me at the time of my justification through Christ, I believe I would have made some very dangerous decisions.

So, what is this book about? It’s simply my life story as I remember it.

Why do I tell it? To hopefully let somebody who may need to know that as believers in Christ, Christians, followers of Christ (whatever you call it), there’s a good chance we won’t figure it all out on this side of heaven, and that’s okay.

I tell it to encourage somebody to follow Jesus and let you know that if there’s a time when you go off on your own path, He continues to offer a way back to Him. Take it!

I also want to mention that every person in this book is portrayed in glimpses. People are complex creatures. My interactions with them, whether long-term or brief, do not enable me to convey the whole of their personality or character. I can only share what effect they had on me in the time that I spent with them.

Thank you for allowing me to share my story with you!

—Tina Marie

Chapter 1

Memories, Recollections, and Tall Tales

To accurately convey the entirety of any person’s life story, we mustn’t assume birth is the beginning.

When recalling the past, one must mentally weave in and out through the mess of memories, pulling them apart like a ball of rubber bands. Some of those memories aren’t even our own; they can be stories heard repeatedly throughout the years, creating a complete picture and introducing additional characters into our historical paradigm. Whether it’s a beloved family pet that placed her thirteen newborn pups into the lap of my oldest brother, hinting for help in freeing them from their amniotic sacs, or a neighbor who once exhibited an act of extreme generosity, those characters and events are part of my own story despite them taking place before I was born. Each character within the intertwined recollections is defined by these interjections, despite how brief.

Another thing I’ve noticed about memories is that, given time, they morph, possibly due to a more mature perspective of a recalled event.

For instance, soon after my eldest brother died, his wife, Penny, told me that she would always be a part of my life and that no man would ever come between her and me. Of course, in my mind’s eye, I see the hot embers glowing as the fire in the fireplace has almost burned out, the Yahtzee game spread out next to us on the carpet, and the delightful fact that I was up past my ten-year-old bedtime. The significance of this memory goes hand in hand with the simple fact that by the time I was two, my brother Michael and his wife, Penny, had become more like pseudo-parents to me than siblings. Their home provided a safe place. I spent more time with them than anyone else. Penny taught me elemental lessons such as the alphabet and the Jesus Loves Me song. She also strongly pointed out that one should never say out loud that the heavier model in J. C. Penney’s catalog looks a lot like her mom. Michael taught me how to tie my shoes and how to properly drink from a glass soda-pop bottle, along with many other valuable life lessons.

Less than one year after she had made that promise, Penny married a man who forbade her from having any contact with our family. I remember that moment clearly, too. I saw my mom cry for the second time as Penny delivered the news in such a matter-of-fact tone. I felt that feeling again, that stunned, stuck-in-my-footsteps feeling, when my dad’s rage was in full force. I felt it too the moment I saw Michael lying in the dimly lit hospital room with drops of blood on his face and on the white sheets disheveled around him. I hate that feeling!

Now that I am older and have experienced more of what life has to offer, I try to remember her circumstances through the mental filter of a mature woman. In doing so, I have come to somewhat justify her decision by realizing that she was not the old person that ten-year-old girl idolized. Penny had abruptly become a single mother, just twenty-five years old. She was a young woman who had been completely dependent on her high school sweetheart husband since the tender age of seventeen and then was suddenly alone. I sort of get it, a little bit, but I still wish that her choice wouldn’t have left me, a little girl, feeling abandoned.

Before I go any further, I need to take a moment to state my reason for putting to paper my life story. For anyone attempting to unravel their own ball of memories, recollections, and tall tales, it can be beneficial to write them down. So, taking my own advice, I did, but in doing so, I found that I really want to exalt my Savior and tell others of His faithfulness. I’ve read some of the events and details of people’s lives as recorded in the Bible, and I know through my own experiences that God’s reasons for allowing certain things to happen are sometimes immediately evident, and other times, it takes a minute to recognize what God is doing. There is also the possibility that, like the people of faith highlighted in the Book of Hebrews Chapter 11, we may never have the blessing of seeing the outcome of His promise manifested in our lifetime. It might be that the generations to follow will benefit from our faith shown through an act of obedience.

So, in addition to its personal psychological benefits, my sincere desire in writing is that somehow my story, or the messiness on the back of the tapestry of my life, will encourage you to go deeper in your relationship with God. I pray that you will know that you are not defined by anything other than what the truth in God’s Word says about you.

Chapter 2

It’s Not about Me

As for an event that took a minute to see what God was doing, a situation comes to mind that took place during the recession of 2008, when I had been so desperate for employment, being one of the many people from the automotive industry still labeled as a displaced worker, I finally was hired as a manufacturing production supervisor in a factory that made soup. During the first hour of the first day at my brand-new job, I received a phone call from a man I had previously worked for. He had called to offer me a job, the position I had been hoping to get for the past two years. I was stunned! Here I was, standing in my office full of nerves on my first day, trying to absorb everything I was being taught, and I finally got the call. I thought, God, why are You doing this? This isn’t good timing. I thought Your timing was perfect. While thinking about how I was going to handle the situation, I gratefully accepted the position and told him I was in the middle of something and would have to call him later in the evening to work out the details. The details, oh boy. How do I handle this with the righteousness of Christ? When the work day was done, I sat down with my new boss and explained the situation. He was a lot more understanding than I anticipated as I graciously resigned from my position after one whole