Syzygy: Eschatos Diagram Novel

By Monty St John

The Eschatos Diagram. A vast diorama of stars, cut by the edge of life and death, where reality crawls and twists into imagination, and doors yawn open to other worlds. A complex puzzle of esoteric technology, linking a multiverse of worlds.

Earth is only one realm in the Eschatos Diagram. And Br

• Language: English
• Publisher: Sultrani LLC
• Release date: Jul 22, 2022
• ISBN: 9798985651249

Book preview

1

The world melted.

I could not control the scream that ripped out of my throat as reality sloughed away like candle wax. It puddled over me, constraining me in place, burning me in ways I could barely comprehend. Then, a mighty force came from somewhere, smashing me free of its clinging grip.

I opened my eyes to receive another slap from Howie. It rocked my head back and brought tears to my eyes. I desperately waved at him to stop before he delivered another. Immerlin's and Howie's voices blurred into one, and I had a hard time picking them apart. As I stared around confused, reality rippled, something that had happened just before the world around me melted.

Fear, a feeling I thought lost since the alien Shodan rearranged my insides, surged, burning in my veins. Howie jumped back, and through the blurry, underwater-like scene that fell over my eyes, I could see his face twitching with astonishment or fear. A flailing limb slipped through the laptop near me, somehow not upended from my flailing. Behind the fear, I realized that I had lost control of my shape, which scared me even more. Thankfully, Immerlin reached me through the limb embedded in the laptop.

Immerlin said, Bret, calm down! You have to get back in control.

I realized he was right intellectually, but emotionally I was lost in a storm that I could not navigate. Then, finally, I felt Immerlin's touch become more substantial, and a greater sense of presence joined me. It became the shield I needed, and between the two of us, we persuaded my body back into its proper shape.

Thankfully, Immerlin had the presence of mind to talk to Howie while we did, so he wasn't continuing to freak out while we worked on putting me back into one piece. So finally, after a long couple of hours that I wanted to bury and forget forever, we completed the reshaping, and I was back.

Howie and I huddled around my kitchen counter while Immerlin joined us on a monitor. The sound of the water in the electric tea kettle boiling was magical, and it made putting aside the chaos I had made of the room easier. Finally, it finished, and I poured the water over the tea. None of us spoke but waited as the tea steeped. Finally, Howie, the bravest of us all, looked up from where he had his head in his hands and spoke first.

We can't continue to do this. I can take you waking up screaming or fighting, but seeing you like that … I can't do it. It's too hard on me to watch.

I let out a laugh that sounded like a horse neighing while Immerlin sighed. I still hadn't stopped shaking from the experience. I wrapped my hands around the steaming teacup while Immerlin answered him.

Immerlin said, It's no easier for me to watch than you, Howard. Yet, however painful this experience, Bret has to learn to control this power.

Howie, he said reflexively. I've told you repeatedly to call me Howie.

Fine, Immerlin said. Howie. Like I've stated repeatedly, Bret has to take control of this power, or he will be in danger.

Howie snorted before sipping his tea. From the twist of Howie's lips, I could tell that he didn't love it any more than he did previously, but we were out of his favorite coffee. Forgive me if I am less trusting than Bret, and I can't believe in your wizard's intuition as much as he does.

I let out another braying laugh before looking up at Howie. I must have looked ghastly since I could see his face twitch slightly.

It didn't surprise me. I hadn't truly slept in days. Even by my poor measurement, the amount of sleep I had gotten in the last few weeks was too little. Don't pick on Immerlin too much, Howie. It's not just his intuition and you know it.

Howie scoffed and sipped more tea. Immerlin used the pause to speak. Howard … Howie. I must admit, I find using your nickname very difficult to say. However, I'll do my best to try, so please be lenient if I forget. Howie, to reiterate the obvious, Bret and I have filled you in about the Eschatos Diagram. Bret is connected to it, whether he wants to be or not. It was the origin of Bret’s past world travel when he slept. Only Bret didn't know that consciously. The battle, however, with the alien Shodan brought that to light, but sadly it also seems to have damaged it. The destruction it caused was not the only damage to the Eschatos Diagram, either, come to find out. Sometime in Bret's past, the Eschatos Diagram was damaged significantly, though who did so or how they inflicted the damage is unknown. So, while we defeated the alien Shodan, fixing the damage it did was critical since it caused enough destruction to destabilize the entire framework. Luckily, with a little cannibalizing and use of the Providence that Bret has, stabilizing and fixing it has been possible.

Howie sneered, an expression I did not often see directed at me, or in this case, Immerlin. You are conveniently leaving out the fact that he gained this … liquid Fortune you call Providence from a magical flower that he got from a creepy voice that we have no idea is friend or foe.

I swallowed the tea I had, thankful I could taste it, given the alien Shodan had killed off my sense of taste earlier. Then, wearily, I looked at Howie and said, Okay. Let's stop digging at each other. Yes, touching the flower was risky. I admitted it then, and I'll say it again now. It was not intentional, and I've said that repeatedly.

Howie waved his hand wildly, eyes flashing. That makes it worse! Do you not see that?

I closed my eyes, took a deep breath, and said, I do see it. I genuinely do, Howie. I don't know what to say or do to convince you that I know it's safe. Think of it like a penny you find on the side of the road. Someone must have owned that coin and dropped it, but—

Howie sliced the air with a hand. Stop. Just stop. I don't want to hear your pathetic penny by the road story again, bud. Come on! Be reasonable. Even if I agree that you own that power now, this repeated attempt to enter the worlds you sense in the Eschatos Diagram is bad. Very bad. Each time you have either come back bleeding blood or with these alien bugs inside you. Which is another topic you keep evading as well. What is your plan to handle them? Or is that something else you will let get out of control before you manage them?

I was hurt and pissed at his words. I knew Howie was as scared. I was too. That he was flailing out of anger and lacking any suitable action to take, still, he was trampling on my feelings.

Back off. I'm not ignoring anything, and you know it. The crap state of my body affects me. It sucks, and I'm working on an answer. The answer, or at least some of it, is in the Eschatos Diagram. That, however, seems to affect a hell of a lot more people than just me. If I've learned nothing more these last few weeks, bleeding blood and more, is the instability in the Eschatos Diagram is harming the worlds I see within it. An entire giant section of it is about to fall off! That's hundreds if not more worlds that might burn and melt like the hell I just walked into a little bit ago. How can I ignore that? Should I turn my back on this when I can see it and think I can help?

Since when have you been a do-gooder who gives a shit about the state of anything? Howie retorted.

I'm not, I shot back.

Howie couldn't help but ask, Then why do this? It's killing you.

I finished my tea and shoved the cup at him aggressively in the air. You know exactly why. There is a good chance I'm responsible for the harm done to those worlds. You know it too. You are just scared. Like I am. It's hard doing this, especially when you poke your head into a world that is quite literally falling apart around you.

Then stop, Howie said stubbornly.

Fine, I said, pouring more tea.

Immerlin said nothing but Howie could help but be suspicious. Bull. Bud, no way I will believe you are just going to give in like that. Don't go behind my back either. No damn way. Don’t think I am not going to know you are trying to do this behind my back when each time it damn well falls apart.

I shook my head. I knew Immerlin was waiting for me to explain, and Howie needed more information to trust me. No, I mean it. If nothing else, this mess of failures has proven that I can't help those worlds in the Eschatos Diagram that the alien Shodan and I cannibalized. Not by jumping into them, at least.

Immerlin finally spoke. What's your plan, Bret? Like Howard, I don't see you giving up.

I'm not, I said, cursing when I burned my tongue on the too-hot tea. It's time to change the approach. I've managed to repair the damaged anchors that connect me to the Eschatos Diagram. Better yet, the adjustments you suggested I make to the island on the ocean of Providence did exactly what was predicted: it automatically started circulating Providence to repair the Eschatos Diagram and the anchor points. Part of the reason we landed on the idea of jumping into those worlds within the damaged part of the Eschatos Diagram was our analysis indicated that worlds became more stable the more I Flashed into them. The Eschatos Diagram is the most stable in the areas around the worlds I had previously touched, especially those that I spent a good amount of time in a Flash. How could I not at least try with that knowledge in hand? Still, those worlds are too dangerous. The last couple of jumps have shown me that. Thankfully, repairing everything has provided me with the luxury of choice. Can you imagine how horrible the situation would be if that weren't the case?

All of us shuddered. Even Immerlin flickered his screen to reflect his take on the situation. His state of being was another landmine that needed addressing. After being sucked into the computer a few weeks ago, not much had changed except for our slow acceptance. Thankfully, Howie hadn't brought that up yet. Still, I suspected it was a matter of time before his mind moved to it.

We drank tea for a little bit, everyone calming down from the previous outburst of emotions before Immerlin finally spoke. I have another item that I think we should talk about since we are pondering the topic of the Eschatos Diagram.

I stared at my empty teacup forlornly and said, Do you mean the increase in Providence not linked to the flower?

Yes. Previously we theorized that the Eschatos Diagram exists not just for you but for everyone. Too many people, like you, have slipped into other worlds when they sleep. They dream, but those dreams are of alien worlds that they traverse the void to find. As you have repaired the Eschatos Diagram, this has changed for you. I think it might be changing for others, as well.

Howie sat back down from refilling the electric kettle. Wrapping a thick hand around his cup, he tapped it gently. Then, he asked, Immerlin, are you thinking that the new Fortune, Providence, or whatever we are calling it right now, is linked to other people like Bret?

Immerlin's voice changed, and I could tell he was smoking again. I should have known when he blanked out the monitor. He knew it bothered me on some level. I almost started railing against him but gave up instead. It was an old argument that I knew I wouldn't win, so why bother? So instead, I gave a thumbs up to show my plus one of the question that Howie had posed.

Yes and no. Yes, I think the others are contributing. I think, somehow, using the Eschatos Diagram requires the payment of a toll or a price. I don't believe this is a conscious action by the other dreamers. I think it happens automatically. So, yes, I think some of the Providence comes from them. But equally, I don't think they are the sole reason for the increase. We know there are people we could reasonably see as aliens to our world who are likely using the Eschatos Diagram. The voice you described, the one that gifted the flower, is an alien creature that knew of the Eschatos Diagram. The people it murdered at Inverse Voices are also candidates. The alien Shodan. And I suspect Mr. Tyche of knowing of the Eschatos Diagram and using it. The Office Killer group, while painted as a terrorist and mercenary organization, is also connected by proxy. I suspect these and others we do not know of have access to and use the Eschatos Diagram. That they also are contributors to the Providence that Bret is gathering. However, unlike the dreamers, I think they know and pay this tax. I have nothing to base this on, just my intuition. Which is why I'm worried on so many levels.

Howie poured the tea. I could tell he wanted coffee, but it hadn't arrived yet. It made me think a bit about the Eschatos Diagram, energy flows, and what I knew about it. Meanwhile, as I pondered the topic, Immerlin and Howie went back and forth about the viability of aliens paying a tax to use the Eschatos Diagram. Finally, the thought wouldn't stay unspoken, and I interrupted the two of them.

Is that why the doors are open?

Howie looked at me in askance while Immerlin blinked back on the monitor, pipe in mouth as I suspected. I looked at him sideways, which he ignored, gesturing for me to explain instead. I took a sip of tea to keep them in suspense on purpose but didn't make them wait long.

I have no idea what normal might be. Who the hell would? Maybe the aliens? Whatever. All I know is that the Eschatos Diagram has a lot of open doors to other worlds. Some of those worlds are dead, some are not, but regardless, each open door has a cost. In the beginning, I didn't understand — remember when we fought with the alien Shodan, and I said I felt like I was paying something, an energy I could sense was there but didn't recognize, and I felt hollowed out from spending it? I didn't know then that I was using Providence to walk the Eschatos Diagram and access the worlds within it. We figured that out later, just like we figured out that each open door had a cost. Now, I wonder if those open doors represent the other dreamers' worlds. In my head, lining up the imagery, it matches what I know about some of those places that I have touched. But it's not a few worlds we are talking about here. It's a lot. Hundreds, at least. I wish there were a master switch of sorts. Part of me thinks it would be wise to close them. I would not wish anyone to dream of the world melting around them, especially those with no idea or sense of control over going.

I sloshed a bit of tea from a sudden onset of trembling as what just happened flashed in front of my eyes. Howie patted me on the arm while Immerlin didn't say anything. As I calmed down, I could see Immerlin had some spark of inspiration from the way he was biting hard on his pipe. Whatever caught his attention must have pulled him completely in since he blinked out and didn't answer my calls to bring him back. Howie and I both looked at each other and laughed. It helped relieve the stress. Plus, it wasn't the first time Immerlin had blanked out on us. We were all getting used to the changes from merging Immerlin's personality with the virtual assistant.

After a few shared moments lampooning some of the goofs that had happened since then, Howie finally got back to the sore topic. Listen, bud. I know you feel compelled to do this, and I won't argue with you. But, still, if only for my sake, back off going into worlds for a few days as a pause. I know it's asking a lot, but my heart can't take seeing you in that state right now.

I looked at Howie and nodded. Even I was feeling thin and wiped out doing this. I promise to back off for a few days, but I won't set it aside.

Howie snorted, pushing his lukewarm tea aside with a look of disgust. I know you well, bud, so don't worry. I need a breather, that's all. Plus, we need to talk about finances. You have to decide whether you are going to do some work or take a different path.

Grunting, I said, You mean work or use the assets Alice left, right?

On the nose, as always, Howie said.

I didn't feel much like working. While I had a call or two that I needed to return due to personal connections, working while handling this puzzle was not on my mind. After some internal wrangling, I finally looked up at Howie and said, Do it. See if we can finagle at least six months or more of freedom to work on this. If not, I have some patent rights that I could barter to find some money. Worse case, I can look for a juicy contract and try to buy some time.

Howie nodded and left.

I focused on my tea, wondering what right move to make. It wasn't so much a good move versus a wrong move to make, but not even knowing the outcome of the action to decide. Closing the doors made sense to me. Stabilizing the worlds next to the fragile part of the Eschatos Diagram did too. I just didn't know which one to tackle first.

2

I promised Howie a break and meant it.

The first day was easy. I had a lot of housekeeping to do.

The second day was a lot harder.

The troubles around the Eschatos Diagram itched at the back of my brain and made it hard to focus. Howie watched me like a hawk, however, not leaving the house. That made it challenging even to pretend to do something else with his eyes always on me. Eventually, on the evening of day two, I broke.

I couldn't do it anymore.

I had to do something.

Reminding myself not to do anything stupid, I used the time I would usually sleep to drop inside and work on those troubles that wouldn't go away. Knowing that going straight to the Eschatos Diagram was too much of a temptation, I went to the island floating on the ocean of Fortune inside me instead.

Immerlin called it Providence, but I preferred Luck or Fortune. Still, to cut down on the confusion, we had agreed on Providence.

The once small lake had expanded massively in the last couple of weeks since I had touched the flower — both from the one-time Providence provided by the flower and the much lesser but consistent streams of Providence. Immerlin and I both figured that Providence came from other users of the Eschatos Diagram and had tried to trace them to the source to find out. It hadn't led anywhere in most cases. Finally, after a lot of dead ends, I found one or two of the more significant streams trailed back to open doors in the Eschatos Diagram. The discovery helped support the idea that interactions with the Eschatos Diagram were the source and the Providence was a tax of sorts. Why I happened to be the recipient wasn't clear, though Immerlin hypothesized that perhaps that meant I was in a particular position of control.

It made me laugh. I loved the idea but couldn't see it yet.

We also tossed around the reason Providence existed as a fluid. While I got Immerlin's explanation, it still made me wonder why it took that form. Nothing we knew between us helped answer that question, so it got filed with others in the growing pile of unanswered things to figure out.

The nice part of partial digitization is those alien parts of me don't need rest. The other parts of me did, though the alien Shodan had made sure to convert most of my critical systems. That meant even though I was going without sleep, I could still function for quite a long time. Not too long, though. I still needed proper rest, or I would suffer.

Immerlin and I had deliberated how the alien parts of me found the energy to function. From the nanites to the gray haze of alien cells that replaced my flesh, they found energy from somewhere. We experimented, of course, to try and figure it out. The research wasn't very conclusive, but still, we learned a thing or two. First, they seemed to gather energy from some interaction that we couldn't measure but thought linked to gravity or magnetism. Part of that thought was rooted in the MRI explosion that happened when it took over for a while. Some pondering was how the nanites acted outside of my body inside the server. Regardless of how they worked alone, where that alien flesh met mine, it took energy from both sides if I made a change. That's why I got highly fatigued if I changed the alien parts of me that connected to my flesh, like when I exploded my arm to show Howie.

Thinking about the alien parts of my body annoyed me, and I shrugged off the thoughts to enjoy my walk on the island. Looking at the beautiful scenery, I thought back to something Immerlin's teacher would say all the time. He liked to preach, often about useless things — at least from my perspective — one thing he said that stuck with me was finding the moment and staying in it. I didn't get it then, and I'm not sure I comprehended it now. Still, I took it to let go of all the thoughts and worries cluttering my mind. To sink into the present and not think of the past and the future. Hah! Easier said than done, that's for sure. I tried, though, and let my feet travel where they wanted, without trying to guide them. I got into a rhythm with the wind, pollen, and flowers, letting it take me where it willed.

I found it soothing.

If I had a wish, it would be to see the Eschatos Diagram. While the island was beautiful and lighted with colors of the entire rainbow, the sky above was dark and unremarkable.

I found it sad and lonely.

In response to my thoughts, the land built up under me, each step I took rising higher as a hill and then a mountain built under my feet. While the sky did not light with stars like my heart willed, I could just make out the edges of the Eschatos Diagram in the far distance. Seeing it startled me and broke the trance that gripped me. Looking around, I realized that I had changed the island, raising a tall mountain, and I stood on its peak.

Before my eyes, the grand majesty of the flora crawled up the sides of the mountain, decorating it streamers of color. It was wondrous to watch, and I almost made another mountain before restraining myself.

While fun to do, I knew nothing was without cost and found what I expected when I came down the mountain and went to the edge of the island. By my eye, the level of the sea of Providence was significantly lower than it was when I entered. Fashioning a mountain to see the Eschatos Diagram was excellent, but I used Providence in the process. I couldn't help but wince, visualizing the tongue lashing I would receive from Immerlin when I told him. Yet, looking back at the view of the new mountain, part of me didn't care. I had always wanted to craft worlds with my hands. Playing with this was like getting your heart's desire. Regardless, I didn't want to create some patchwork mess.

Stifling the urge to build more, I left instead, choosing to wake up.

Opening my eyes, I found that only a few hours had passed. Thankfully, the process of going to sleep and waking up had been one of the first things I fixed.

Leaving my pallet, I checked on Immerlin, who ignored me after saying he was fine. He was working on a thought and wanted some peace. Howie was asleep, so I left him alone. That left me to my own devices. Knowing I needed something else to focus on to stay away from the temptation of working on the Eschatos Diagram, I fired up a computer and opened some design software. If I wanted to do it right, I needed to plan out some things.

Humming, I toyed with the software, crafting a clone of the current island, and started playing, adding, and subtracting as thoughts struck me.

I lost track of time, having fun, not paying attention to anything until Howie's voice sounded out behind me. That looks like shit, you know.

I turned into the scent of coffee. Traced the scent to look up at a smug Howie. He was looking over my shoulder at the clutter of architecture I had built on the screen. Looking at the ugly mess I had created, I couldn't help but agree with him. Yeah, not my best effort. I can't find a way to put in all the things I want and make it balanced or not look ugly.

Howie laughed, enjoying his coffee as he shook his head at the monstrosity I created. You never did have a good sense of the aesthetic. I'm not sure how you thought having a collision of Xanxia and modern buildings like that would ever make sense. Anyway, you couldn't sleep last night?

Looking at what I had made, I had to agree with him. Howie was always better at engineering and design games. I also nodded to answer his question, turning my eyes back to the messy map.

Howie asked, Is that your island? The one in your head?

I should have been paying attention, but I wasn't and mumbled an affirmative to his question and started clicking, moving things all over to try and make it look better. Howie figured out he didn't have my attention, so he clamped down on my shoulder. The hard squeeze did the trick, and I looked away from the screen to gaze up at him. Unfortunately, his expression was flat and hard to read.

He put down his coffee. His eyes were murky, showing his struggle between helpless acceptance and annoyance. Finally, he shook his head and said, I guess two days is a pretty good track record. Although I gotta admit, I expected you to renege on the first day.

I couldn't help but wince and protest. No, Howie, damn it, I didn't do anything with the Eschatos Diagram.

He snorted and let me go, picking up his coffee and walking away to the kitchen. I looked up at the ceiling for a second and then got out of my chair and followed him. He had the tea kettle filled and on by the time I got there.

Howie started talking while he fired up another cup of coffee.

I didn't ask you not to mess with the Eschatos Diagram. On the contrary, I asked for a break from the whole thing for a little bit.

I couldn't help but mutter, I was only working on what I thought the island should look like … its mine, anyway.

Howie laughed. You sound like a petulant five-year-old.

I flipped him off and