Undone

By Arya True

This is no fairytale.

She has struggled her entire life to meet harsh standards birthed from her mother's sin. The weight of perfection has become so comfortable she does not even realize that she is carrying it. That is, until he reaches out his hands and asks to help her put down the burden. Could she walk a new path with him

• Language: English
• Publisher: Arya True
• Release date: Aug 11, 2022
• ISBN: 9781088060872

Book preview

Chapter 1

So Unlikely

~Alilia~

---

A bullet brought him to me.

It was the end of my shift at Mt. Sinai Community Hospital, and I was headed toward the glass double doors that would take me to the parking lot. Before I could get there, a team of EMTs came rushing through them. I flattened myself against a wall, trying not to be trampled. As the team rushed past me, a bloody hand reached out and grabbed the bottom of my uniform shirt. I saw arm muscles flex as the strong hand clamped down tighter on my shirt. I found myself running to keep up with the EMTs so that my shirt wouldn’t be completely ripped off of me. While running, I caught a glimpse of the patient, a handsome brown face twisted in anguish.

Get out of the way!

You’re in the way!

EMTs yelled at me as I ran along with them.

I can’t! He has my uniform! I screamed back at them.

The EMT in front of me, fed up with being slowed down, reached behind to pry the bloody hand from my shirt.

Let go! he hollered at the patient. Then he turned his frustration to me. And you, damn it, get out of our way!

All it took was one hard, frustration-fueled shove, and I flew backward into a cart and landed hard on my behind. The EMT’s shove steered the patient’s gurney too far to the right. I looked up just in time to see the team of EMTs and the patient collide with Dr. Nance. The doctor fell to the floor, trying to figure out what had just hit him.

My friend Bree and another nurse rushed over and helped me to my feet. When I stood, I felt a cold chill tickle my midriff. Looking down I realized that most of the front of my shirt had been ripped off. Bree covered me with her body asking me if I was okay.

I was just trying to go home, I answered.

After changing into a clean uniform top, all I wanted to do was get as far away from the hospital as possible and sleep off the episode that had just occurred. Of course, fate wouldn’t have it that way. Because I was an employee, there was endless paperwork I had to complete before leaving. Because of the bloody hand that had snatched me along for the ride, I had to have tests run. Because all the doctors and nurses were preoccupied with patients, I waited an eternity in between tests and examinations. After six hours of being confined to an emptied employee lounge room, fatigue turned into irritation. I grabbed my purse and headed for the back exit door.

On my way down the hallway, I heard Head Nurse Mills call out to me.

Alilia, hold on a second! Let me see you before you leave. The soles of her rubber shoes squeaked as she rushed behind me.

My attitude was three seconds from going haywire. Lord knows I wanted to keep walking straight out the door. But Nurse Mills, Ms. Janice as I called her, had been like a second mother to me since I’d started at Sinai over a year ago. From my first day, she’d taken me under her wing, and I had the benefit of learning the ropes from the best.

Respect slowed my pace and turned me around. Miss Janice pulled me close to her tall thin frame in an embrace and planted a kiss on my forehead as we continued walking

I’m all right. I’m just tired, I assured her. Very, very tired.

I’m glad you’re all right, Sugar Lily.

I stopped walking and looked up into her face. The only time she ever called me Sugar Lily was when she wanted me to cover a shift for her.

Fifteen minutes tops. She let her words rush out.

You know I love you, but I can’t stay today. My attitude was now two seconds from going haywire.

It’s not to cover a shift, she said while guiding me back in the direction I’d just come from. We have a gunshot victim, one shot to the shoulder, and I want to offer him the Horizon Program. I think he’s a good candidate.

Why would I have to be there for this? I asked, attitude hanging on by a thread.

Because he’s a young man, and I think you’ll do better at reeling him in. She appealed.

Ms. Janice and her husband Byron, a retired police officer, had started the Horizon Program three years ago. It was geared toward mentoring young men toward finding their way to positive lifestyles. At the hospital, we treated a lot of shooting victims who were often caught up in illegal or deadly habits. Most Horizon participants were Sinai patients first. But lately, young men had been declining to sign up. Ms. Janice was looking for a new marketing perspective, me.

I caved. He gets a ten-minute explanation, and then I pass him to you.

That’s all I need. She smiled.

I passed my purse to Ms. Janice while she gave me his chart and opened his room door for me. I pulled together all the energy I had and approached his bed. He was resting on his back with his head turned facing the wall to the right of him.

Hello, I’m Nurse Parks. I was wondering if I could have a moment of your time. I stopped a few feet away from his bed and waited on his response.

You’re already taking up time. Though his voice was hoarse, the rude tone was not lost on me. He didn’t even turn to see who he was speaking to.

My irritation spiked. You got somewhere to be? I wished I could take the words back as soon as I’d spoken them.

He slowly turned his head toward me, and I braced myself to be kicked out of his room. When I looked into his face, my knees went slack, and I had to struggle to keep standing. My Horizon recruit was the same patient who had practically snatched my shirt off hours earlier. I saw recognition register in his eyes too. For an awkward moment, I stood there lost for words. Eventually, my professionalism kicked in, and I gave it a softer try.

Look, I know it’s been a long, hard day for you, I spoke even softer than my normal tone reserved for patients. Trust me, I’ve had a long day myself. I just want to tell you about a program that you might benefit from. I’m not here to ask you for details of what happened. I’m a nurse, not a police officer. I’m here to offer you help.

He continued to lie on his back but shifted his eyes to the ceiling. I’m listening.

I breathed a sigh of relief and pulled a chair next to his bed. The program is called Horizons. It’s for young men who are looking for a change. You know, maybe they want to get away from certain habits, maybe they want to change the direction of their life because they are fathers now, and sometimes, they just know it’s time for them to do something different but they need guidance to find that something.

He was silent, and so I went on.

It doesn’t cost any money to be in the program. Job preparation, counseling, housing, school assistance, and legal help are all available if you want it. I’ve seen Horizon turn a lot of lives around. There will be men from the community helping you every step of the way without judgment. All you have to do is make good choices and not land in my hospital with a bullet in you again. I ended with a joke as a peace offering.

I saw a slight dimple crease his left cheek as he grinned.

What do you think? This sound like something you’d be interested in? I asked.

It was you that I grabbed earlier, huh? he asks.

Yes.

I wasn’t trying to grab you, but I do apologize. He turned his face away from me to his right when he spoke.

I had to close the Horizon deal with him, so I decided to let it go. Really, it’s okay. You want me to sign you up for Horizon?

What did you say your name was again? He ignored another question.

Alilia Parks, I answered.

"Do you even know my name?" he quizzed me as he turned to face me again.

I’d been so caught off guard by Ms. Janice that I hadn’t asked. I started to open his chart to glance at his name but his hand came down on the chart before I could open it all the way.

I know you can look it up. I just wanted to know if you knew it, he said before sliding his hand off the chart back onto his bed.

What I do know is I want to help you. I flipped the chart open and found his name. So, what do you say Jared Coz?

He mumbled something I couldn’t hear clearly.

I’m sorry. I couldn’t hear you. Can you repeat that for me?

I said I’ll take the help, he spoke louder and clearer.

I knew that wasn’t what he’d said before but I accepted his answer. Good. You made the right choice. I stood and slid the chair back to where it belonged. I’ll be back with Nurse Mills, and she’ll get the rest of your information.

I was closing his chart when I looked down and saw Dr. Nance’s name on his chart. Dr. Nance treated you?

Nah, I think his name was Dr. Suarez or something like that. Why?

I looked up at him and saw him searching my face, probably trying to figure out why my brow was creased with concern. I quickly relaxed. Oh, just asking.

There something I need to know, Miss Helpful?

You are in good hands with Dr. Suarez.

The other guy must be new, Jared assumed.

No, he just has a thing for CoJack, I mumbled, not really expecting Jared to hear or understand hospital jargon for the mixture of cocaine and Jack Daniels that kept a lot of doctors going through long shifts.

Hmm. He chuckled. That’s interesting. I’ll pass on the coke, but I could use some Jack right now.

I pointed a figure in his direction. No, Mr. Coz. You just gave all of that up, I reminded him.

He smiled at me. In spite of myself, I smiled back.

What the hell was wrong with me? I found myself thinking about Jared Coz on my drive home, intoxicated by his cocoa skin, thick eyebrows, and kissable lips. I could still see his six-foot-seven, well-built frame dominating his too-small hospital bed. Even in that circumstance, his masculinity had shined through. Then there was his smile. He had the whitest teeth I’d ever seen when he’d flashed that smile at me.

I shook my head to rid myself of thoughts of him. I had been single for almost two years. I needed male companionship. Even so, Jared couldn’t be it. After all, he was a gunshot victim, regardless of how minor it’d been. Who knew what he had going on in his life? He seemed charming enough, but I had a feeling that bullet had found him for a specific reason.

I released a deep sigh and prepared myself for my mother and grandmother. After my mother had been diagnosed with multiple sclerosis three years ago, her health had steadily declined. Two years ago, she and my grandmother decided it was time for me to put my life on hold to be the dutiful daughter and granddaughter they thought I should be. Neither would leave the house they had shared for twenty-four years. As expected, I sold most of my furniture, packed up what was left, terminated the lease on my apartment, and went home.

If you could call it that.

After almost two years of living under my mother and grandmother’s watchful eyes, I was searching for a way out, regretting ever moving back in the first place. No man I brought home was worthy of sitting in their living room. So I stopped bringing them home. If I stayed out too late, I was doing something that was unladylike. To avoid judgment, I went straight home after work. I nursed people back to health all day at work and then went home to care for a mother who would only allow me to call her by her first name, Tonda, and a grandmother who treated me as the hired help instead of her blood relation.

I parked my car in the driveway and made my way to the front door. I saw the curtains on the front window sway as I turned my key in the lock.

You’re late, Tonda greeted me, standing next to the window she’d just peeked out of.

I had a long day, I answered flatly and continued to my bedroom.

That’s how you greet your mother? my grandmother questioned me.

All I said was that I had a long day. I just need to sleep before I have to go back to the hospital in the morning. I stepped into my room and closed the door behind me.

Less than one minute after I collapsed into my bed, shoes and uniform still on, I heard my door creak open again. I made no move to turn around and see which one of them it was. I kept my eyes closed, not caring about the judgment being cast behind me.

Did you forget? my grandmother finally asked.

My stomach did a quick flip-flop. I’d completely forgotten I was supposed to be home at five thirty to take them to mid-week Bible study at church. I awaited the tongue-lashing that was about to come. But nothing came.

I had an incident at work, I explained. We had a patient come in and he—

We let you stay here paying next to nothing. My grandmother cut me off and spoke to me in a tone that made me feel like a child. We use our small checks to pay the bills. All we ask in return is that you be here to help us with the things we can’t do on our own.

I felt a ton of guilt being thrown in my direction.

We took care of you as best as we could. Do you know how hard it is for two women in this world? Huh? Especially trying to raise up a young lady and teach you Christian ways! Now that we’re getting up in age you treat us like burdens. Even after all that we’ve done for you, you still don’t appreciate us.

She was waiting on me to respond, and I knew what she wanted me to say. I didn’t want to say anything to her. I’d had the day from hell while she’d sat at home waiting on me to do for her what she could do on her own. I couldn’t believe she was blaming me for not taking them to church when there was a church van that picked up our next-door neighbor twice a week for the same church services they went to. They insisted on me being their personal chauffeur. Furthermore, I paid a lot more than next to nothing for household expenses. I was buying groceries, paying phone bills, and often paying all the rent when they gave all their checks to the church to help fund special projects.

My grandmother’s presence loomed in my doorway, waiting to hear what she wanted.

I’m sorry. I relented so she would go away.

I heard the soft padding of her footsteps as she walked away and left my door open. I got up and closed it. When I climbed back into bed, a pang of hunger struck. I realized that I hadn’t had anything to eat for dinner. I sank deeper underneath my covers, forgoing dinner. I was too exhausted to digest anything other than anger anyway.

---

~Jared~

---

The next morning, I snatched off all the tubes the nurses and doctors had taped to me. They’d pulled the bullet out and stitched me up. Every few hours, a nurse would come in to tell me how great I was doing. If that was how they felt, I concluded there was no real reason for me to spend another day in the hospital. If anything, all I would need was some pain medication I could pick up from anywhere. When the stitches healed, I could clip those myself.

I believe I was born with a high tolerance for pain. One bullet couldn’t put me out of commission. What that bullet had done was solidify my decision to move forward with my plans to keep investing and walk away from gambling with my life. I’d started working corners at fourteen, taking care of myself, my mother and father with money earned by feeding addiction that destroyed families. As those that brought me into the game were sentenced to decades or death, I moved up the ranks. I couldn’t see how reckless I was then. My focus was on helping my mother pay bills where my father consistently fell short. His money went to liquor and bailing him out the trouble the liquor got him into. . No, I wasn’t paying taxes, but my life and soul were taxed every time I closed a sale or passed a kilo.

I took the bullet that was meant for Todd, my best friend. We grew up together along with Chris. The three of us hustled together. They were my brothers in every way but blood. Todd would have done the same for me. Though we were now headed in different directions, we would always share the past. We were all a permanent part of each other’s lives.

I saw the car roll to a stop across the street from where we were standing. I saw the gun aimed at Todd and instinct moved me to jump in front of him. We both fell to the cement. He hadn’t been hit, but I took one to the shoulder on the way down. There was a lot of blood, but I refused to go to the hospital, knowing I’d have to answer questions. When I started fading in and out of consciousness, Todd called for help. After all, no one wants to lose a brother.

I knew I had lost a lot of blood. I was so weak I could barely keep my eyes open. My mind was racing though. I went back and forth between wanting to let go and wanting to fight to live. Letting go won. I was tired of carrying the weight of all the families I contributed to breaking apart. I was tired of the worry and heartbreak I saw in my own family.

On the way into the hospital, I’d reached out to grab one of the EMTs to tell him to let me go. My thought was that if I could somehow slow them down, they would let me out. Instead, I’d grabbed a nurse. When she looked down at me, I saw the panic on her face. At that moment, I became more aware of my heartbeat than ever before. It was racing to match the worry on her face.

When she came into my room later, I felt better. She had her hair pulled back in a plain ponytail, but her face . . . her face was beautiful. She had big brown eyes, a petite nose, full lips, and clear, brown skin that I could tell hadn’t been touched up with cosmetics.

She was special. There was a reason my hand had found her and not the EMT when I was trying to die. Later, I find out that the doctor I would have been assigned had been run over when the EMTs turned too hard after trying to right their course that she’d thrown them off. She saved me from the unsteady hand of a cocaine-fogged doctor. She’d given me a second chance at a life I had been ready to throw away.

I entertained the thought of pursuing her but quickly dismissed it. She seemed like a proper girl, maybe raised in the church. She wouldn’t take time out for me. So instead of searching for her before I walked out of the hospital, I grabbed my cell phone and called Todd. I knew he had revenge on his mind, but I didn’t want it on my account.

---

~Alilia~

---

Fed up with home, I started asking for extra hours at work. Until I figured out a way to move out of the house without being disowned by the only two family members I had, I needed to minimize my contact with them. In the meantime, they’d understand if I pulled extra hours as long as I prepared three meals a week, cleaned the house, and chauffeured them to a few doctor appointments and church. So I found myself working triple-time: double shifts at work and a third shift as homemaker in my after-work hours. Before I knew it, nearly a week had passed since I’d met Jared. I was busy but thoughts of how he was doing would randomly break through.

I was enjoying my time at work, though. At least there I did things I wanted to do for people who were appreciative. I came to realize that the only time I smiled was at work. Furthermore, I had Ms. Janice there providing the maternal warmth that my mother would not or could not. I wasn’t sure which.

I had been at work for hours when I finally found a moment of downtime to chat with my friend, Bree. She’d been at Sinai almost three years. She was my complete opposite, outspoken and short-tempered, but we’d connected immediately.

I can’t believe you’re here on your birthday. You should be off preparing to party, she said.

Please, I’m just a year older. Nothing to make a big deal about. Besides, you know I’m not a party person.

You’ve been here a lot lately. Bree frowned. You’re here when I come in, and you’re still here when I leave. When do you have time to sleep, girl?

I don’t! I joked.

I hope you have time to eat? I heard a deep baritone behind me.

I turned around to see Jared. Standing, he towered above me, and I had to take a moment to steady myself. He looked even better than he had a week ago, standing there in a crisp, white button-down and dark jeans. I took note of his fresh haircut and the meticulous trim of his sideburns and connected goatee.

Huh? was all I could force out of my mouth. I heard Bree giggling behind me.

I asked if you had time to eat. Can I take you to lunch, Miss Helpful? Then he went and did it. He smiled at me. It’ll be my birthday gift to you.

I, umm... I immediately felt a sting of embarrassment wash over me after twisting my words. I cleared my throat. What I meant was, I need to finish my shift.

No, I’ll cover for you, Bree chimed in. You need to eat something before you pass out in here. Go ahead, we’re not that busy anyway.

I looked from her to Jared. He pulled a bouquet of red and yellow tulips, my favorite flower, from behind his back. I smiled and took a step toward him to accept my flowers. I faltered for a moment when I saw the glimmer from the diamonds in his watch. A reminder of what had most likely brought him to the emergency room a week ago.

Is that a yes? he asked.

I guess I have to eat, right? I agreed and passed my flowers to Bree to put behind the nurse’s hub with her.

We walked side by side to the exit in silence. My palms were sweaty. I wiped them on my scrubs and tried to grasp the realization that I was having lunch with the sexiest man I’d ever seen. I needed to relax so I wouldn’t scramble my words throughout lunch. It was going to be hard. This close to him, I could smell the scent of his cologne, and it was intoxicating.

I didn’t think I would see you again, I said, trying to break the ice.

I had to apologize for . . . you know. And I wanted to say thank you for trying to help me out with the program.

That’s my job. I help people, I answered. Miss helpful, right?

Is that all? You were just doing your job? he questioned me, a slight grin on his face.

That’s right. Even with patients that rip my scrubs. It was my turn to grin.

Hey, I’m trying to make up for that. He laughed.

We were crossing the street to the parking garage when I saw the sign for Chaz Ristorante a block away. It felt like ages since I’d been there. They had the best rigatoni martino I’d ever tasted. Excitement must have registered in my face.

You want to go there? Jared asked.

They have the best Italian food. Have you eaten there before?

No, but there’s a first time for everything, right? he answered and led the way to the restaurant.

Jared opened the door to the restaurant for me. Though he said he’d never been there before, he walked in as if he owned the restaurant. I admired his confidence as we were led me to a quiet booth in the back.

This cool? he asked.

Yeah, this is good.

A waitress strolled over to welcome us and provide us with menus. She took our drink orders and left us to scan the menu.

I glanced to make sure they still had the rigatoni martino on the menu and closed it once I saw that they did.

I think I’m going to have the lasagna, Jared said.

Good choice. That’s my second favorite dish here.

The waitress came back with our drinks and a basket of bread. She took our orders, promising to have our food out shortly.

How long is your lunch break, anyway? Jared asked as he took a piece of bread.

I get an hour, but I usually don’t take all of it, I answered.

You’re a good girl. I could tell that the moment I saw you, he said.

Why? Because of the way I look? I asked. You know it’s not good to judge a book by its cover, I said, thinking about my first impression of him and biting down on my tongue

You’ve got this innocence about you. He looked up and met my eyes with his own. I like it.

I could feel the heat rise to my brown cheeks. I dipped my head, flattered by his admission.

Right there, that’s what I’m talking about. He referred to my blush.

Thank you, I guess? It had been forever since I’d been on a date, and it was showing.

He was mistaking nerves for virtue.

We ate bread and sipped our drinks until the waitress brought our orders to the table. Jared took one bite of his lasagna and nodded his approval. I watched him chew and took note of how soft his lips looked. Even found myself wanting to kiss them.

This is pretty good, Jared said as he cut another piece of lasagna.

Yeah, I told you Chaz is a great spot for Italian.

I could hit this spot a couple of times a week. He continued to take hearty bites of his food.

You should, I gave him a welcoming smile.

Is that an invitation for more lunch dates?

Maybe, I teased, surprising myself.

We made small talk and shared a few laughs between bites. After we finished our lunch, Jared paid the bill and tip. I wasn’t ready to go back to work. I was grateful when Jared offered to take a walk-through the park to fill what was left of my lunch hour.

So tell me how Horizons is going for you, I asked as we started a trail in the park.

I only met with the group once. Everyone was real cool, but I don’t know if it’s a group that I would normally choose, Jared answered.

That was the point in you joining. To meet new people, do new things, I reminded him.

I know, Miss Helpful.

You really can call me Alilia.

All right, Alilia. That’s a pretty name, he complimented.

Thanks. Do you think that you will go to another meeting?

It’s possible. I don’t know. I prefer to keep my circle small. He stroked his goatee and look away.

Well, I’m flattered that you asked me to lunch. Tell me more about you.

Well, despite how we met, I’m easygoing. I just focus on taking care of my home and my parents. No kids yet. I’m really trying to build up my business.

What is your business? I pressed him.

I make investments. Mostly real estate.

Was it an investment that put that bullet in you?

No, it was a person that put that bullet in me. His answer was sharp. Listen, when I met you, I felt a connection. You’re gorgeous. Something about you makes me want to get to know you better, beyond what you look like. It took me a week to make my way back up to the hospital because I knew you were a good girl, and you probably wouldn’t give me a second thought. I figured I’d give it a shot anyway. I had to at least try. Since you’re here, I’m guessing you had some interest too. I’m looking for someone to share my time with, and I just want to get to know you better. Am I asking too much?

I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have some reservations, I answered.

Would you take a chance and get to know me? he asked. I mean, I want you to know who I really am—not just what you pieced together from one day. I want to know you outside of the hospital. I’m not a bad guy.

I can take that chance. If knowing him came with too many risks, then I could let go later.

Jared felt different from the other guys I’d dated. He had an edge to him that intrigued me. I found myself enjoying his company and feeling a strong sense of safety in the presence of his masculinity. He wasn’t the church boys my grandmother and my mother, Tonda had encouraged me to date. Nor was he like any of the other guys I’d chosen with no real interest other than to occupy myself. The curiosity and attraction I felt toward Jared was natural, easy.

You a Bible-thumper too? he asked with a smile.

I used to go to church, if that’s what you’re implying.

I knew it. He laughed. You don’t go anymore?

Not since I started at the hospital. My shifts are so crazy sometimes. Between that and taking care of things at home, I don’t really have a whole lot of extra time on my hands.

Oh, who’s at home? Jared leaned in. He didn’t blink at all as he waited to hear my answer.

I bit down on my tongue, cursing myself for even bringing up home. I help my mom and grandmother out some.

You live with them? One of his brows rose just a little.

Yeah. I moved back about two years ago. I looked up at him to see his reaction. He seemed unaffected.

Three generations in one house? That must be interesting.

You don’t know the half of it. I rolled my eyes.

He laughed as we crossed the street and headed back toward the hospital.

Did you enjoy lunch, Birthday Girl? he asked.

Anything beats hospital food, I joked.

Whoa, you know how to crush a brother. He placed a hand over his heart, faking hurt feelings.

No, I really did enjoy myself, I admitted. You’re pretty good company, even though you’re still something of a mystery man. We just spent an hour together, and I still don’t know much about you.

That’s why you should let me take you on a real date, he said as he moved in closer to me. Do you have to work tomorrow?

Until seven.

So we can do a late dinner.

That sounds good to me. I tried to answer calmly, but my stomach was doing somersaults. I gave him my number to store on his cell phone.

All right, Li. I’ll call you tomorrow. Thanks for having lunch with me.

Before I could recover from the sound of my shortened name rolling off his tongue, he leaned in and planted a gentle kiss on my forehead.

Happy Birthday.

Thank you, I said as he walked away.

My steps were a little bit lighter as I walked back into the hospital. I was almost to the nurse’s hub before I realized I was smiling. Smiling because I could still smell his cologne. I could still feel his lips.

Someone had a good lunch! Bree teased as she handed me my tulips from behind the counter. Take these. I’m tired of people asking me about them.

Actually, I had a great lunch! I said as I took my flowers.

Just be careful, Alilia. She folded her arms across her chest.

I know, Bree. He’s got me feeling some kind of way, though, I confessed.

Every woman wants to catch that feeling, she said.

I’d already decided I didn’t want to just catch the feeling; I wanted to own it.

Chapter 2

Just Stay

~Jared~

---

It’s about time I get some good news from you! I spoke to Tony on the other end of my phone.

Yeah, JC. I told you this was all about timing. The next few houses should be sold within the month. Don’t worry about ’em, Tony assured me.

For the past few months, I’d been working with Tony, a contractor, to flip houses that had been foreclosed. I put up the money to purchase the houses. Tony went to the auctions and closed the deals. He’d put his crew to work restoring the homes so we could resell them and turn nice profits. I’d heard that some real estate agents hated our type of business. All I knew was that it beat the hustle I’d had for the past twelve years.

Finally, I was seeing profits roll in from the investments in the homes. I felt good about my choice, more secure in my financial future. With the slow start on my new path, I’d been tempted to step in on a few bets. I was glad profit had started emerging before I began taking steps backward.

I hung up with Tony as I turned into my parents’ driveway, parking behind my pop’s old Impala. I needed to make my weekly stop to check on them and drop off whatever money they needed. Neither of them worked. They hadn’t needed to after I started bringing in significant cash. They’d accepted my money shamefully at first. Now, it was expected.

When I walked into the house, I found them sitting in the living room. I gave my pop a quick pound and gave my mother a kiss on the cheek.

What’s up with you two? I asked before sitting on the sofa

Just watching a little television before I dip out to pick up some of the good water, Pop said, laughing at his own joke.

My mom shot him a look of disgust. That good water is going to be the death of you. The doctor told you to slow down on that liquor. Your liver can’t take much more.

What can I say? It keeps me on the good foot! Pop let out another round of laughter.

Come on, Pop. If the doctor said to ease up on it then you need to. I felt a familiar frustration rising in me. I was tired of being the son that had to parent his father.

Oh, I’m all right. Don’t listen to your mama. She takes anything those doctors say to be the truth. Nobody has the final verdict on me but God. My pop battled back. His chin was jutted upward in defiance and he looked me directly in the eyes. He was daring me to challenge him.

Determined to keep my good mood afloat, I decided to keep my visit short. I pulled an envelope from my pocket and placed it on the coffee table. It felt like that had been my routine forever. Say a quick hello, leave the money on the table, and dash for the door. It’d been the same amount for the past years but always more than enough.

My mother knew that me leaving the money on the table meant I was about to leave. I hadn’t lived with my parents in more than eight years. As a kid, I couldn’t wait to get out of their house and away from their constant fighting over my Pops’ girlfriends and good water. As soon as I could, I left and later upgraded to my house. I had been looking for peace that I couldn’t get with them.

If you don’t need anything else, I’m going to head out. Besides, I’m blocking you in, Pops. I stood, preparing to leave.

Todd’s mother, Sarah, told me you got shot, Mom blurted out.

There it was. Another blow I had been hoping to avoid. I sat back down on the sofa, knowing she wanted an explanation. There was no need for me to tell you. I wasn’t seriously hurt.

You were shot, Jared! I shouldn’t have to find out about my only child being shot by his best friend’s mother! Tears shone in her eyes.

Don’t worry, Ma. Things are changing for the better.

I watched her eyes shift from me to the money on the table, a clear reminder of what she was truly worried about.

Well, what are we supposed to do around here for money, Jared? Her voice rose a few octaves, laced with panic.

My pops looked on in silence, willing to postpone his trip for the good water to hear this conversation.

I’ll still bring your money by. You’ll be taken care of Ma.

They both relaxed in their seats a little easier after hearing that. I stood to leave again.

I gotta go, I said.

What? You got a hot date? Pops joked.

Actually, I do. I smiled thinking about Alilia.

I hope it’s not that Jamie girl, my mom said. She was so uncouth. I don’t know what you were thinking about when you took up with her.

No, Ma. This is someone else. I left Jamie alone a while ago.

Good. At least you leave one alone before you start in on another. She shot my pop another pointed look.

All right, I’m gone. If you need me before next week, call me on my cell. I slipped out of the door before anything else could be said.

Once I was back behind the wheel of my truck, I hit audio on my dash and let my music blast in an attempt to revive my mood. My pops hadn’t been the greatest husband to my mom, so I understood her dislike for him. But my mom hadn’t been all that supportive of my dad’s music, which led to his resentment toward her. I didn’t understand why they chose to stay in the same house together with all the dislike and resentment crowding the place.

---

~Alilia~

---

At the end of my shift, I pulled my purse from my locker and checked my phone. I had three voicemails. Excitement coursed through me at the possibility that they were from Jared. One was from him and the other two were from home. The first was from Tonda, explaining she wanted me to pick up her prescription on my way home. The second was Jared calling to confirm our date. The third was from my grandmother wanting to know where I’d put her gray sweater after washing it.

I was sure to pick up Tonda’s prescription on my way home. While driving, I’d also thought up a good story for my grandmother about her sweater. I didn’t want to tell her the truth. It had shrunk to the size of a doll’s shirt in the dryer. It was a white lie, but it would save me having to listen to her ramble on about it.

When I walked through the door, I placed Tonda’s prescription on the dinner table where I was sure she’d find it. I proceeded to my bedroom where I proceeded to call Jared back.

What’s up, Li? I thought you were going to stand me up for a second.

Of course not. I smiled at the sound of his baritone over the phone. He sounded happy. Just give me a little time to get ready. I just got in from work.

No problem, he assured me. Is an hour enough time?

I can make it happen in an hour.

I gave him my address, and he promised to be at my door in sixty minutes. I made a mental note to be ready in fifty minutes so I could be waiting at the door when he arrived. I didn’t want to risk Tonda or my grandmother answering. They’d give him an interrogation that would run him off in a hurry. I preferred that he stay awhile.

I hung up and opened my closet. It had been forever since I’d been on a date, and I had no clue what to wear. I wanted to call Bree and ask for some guidance, but I didn’t have enough time for the tangents that she was sure to go off on.

My eyes went straight to a black sweater-dress I’d bought but never worn. It hugged my curves in ways I was sure Tonda would disapprove of. With her always standing guard near the front door, I could never see a way to make it out of the house without her seeing me. Besides, I hadn’t really had anywhere to wear it until now.

I snatched it from the hanger in the closet and spread it out on my bed, reminding myself that I was a grown woman. I could wear whatever I wanted to wear. This was the perfect dress for the occasion. I’d deal with Tonda another day.

I showered, oiling my skin afterward. I loved the sheen the oil left on my brown skin. I was proud of my curves and never regretted showing them off. I slipped my dress on over my undergarments and stepped back to look at myself in my mirror. I grabbed my ankh earrings