Conversations with People Who Hate Me: 12 Things I Learned from Talking to Internet Strangers
By Dylan Marron
4/5
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About this ebook
“Dylan Marron is like a modern Mister Rogers for the digital age.” —Jason Sudeikis
From the host of the award-winning, critically acclaimed podcast Conversations with People Who Hate Me comes a thought-provoking, witty, and inspirational exploration of difficult conversations and how to navigate them.
Dylan Marron’s work has racked up millions of views and worldwide support. From his acclaimed Every Single Word video series highlighting the lack of diversity in Hollywood to his web series Sitting in Bathrooms with Trans People, Marron has explored some of today’s biggest social issues.
Yet, according to some strangers on the internet, Marron is a “moron,” a “beta male,” and a “talentless hack.” Rather than running from this online vitriol, Marron began a social experiment in which he invited his detractors to chat with him on the phone—and those conversations revealed surprising and fascinating insights.
Now, Marron retraces his journey through a project that connects adversarial strangers in a time of unprecedented division. After years of production and dozens of phone calls, he shares what he’s learned about having difficult conversations and how having them can help close the ever-growing distance between us.
Charmingly candid and refreshingly hopeful, Conversations with People Who Hate Me will serve as both a guide to anyone partaking in difficult conversations and a permission slip for those who dare to believe that connection is possible.
Dylan Marron
Dylan Marron is the host and creator of the critically acclaimed podcast Conversations with People Who Hate Me, a social experiment that connects adversarial internet strangers through phone calls. He wrote on the third season of the Emmy Award–winning hit television series Ted Lasso. Dylan hosted and produced the six-part audio documentary The Redemption of Jar Jar Binks. Conversations with People Who Hate Me was selected as a Podcast Pick by USA TODAY and The Guardian, named “the timeliest podcast” by Fast Company, won a Webby Award, and was the subject of Dylan’s 2018 TED Talk, “Empathy Is Not Endorsement.” He lives in Brooklyn, New York, with his husband, Todd.
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Reviews for Conversations with People Who Hate Me
14 ratings1 review
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Dylan Morran has a podcast, also called Conversations with People Who Hate Me, which started off as him having friendly, respectful one-on-one conversations with people who left him nasty comments online, and has since branched out to him moderating similar conversations between other people. Listening to it is always an interesting experience, because before every episode I'm always sort of instinctively bracing myself for the kind of stressed-out awfulness I tend to feel in the presence of serious conflict (particularly conflict about the kind of big, important issues the podcast usually addresses). But then, something amazing happens: almost always, I finish the episode feeling uplifted and with some of my faith in humanity restored.In this book, Dylan talks a little bit about the origins and evolution of the podcast and the experience of making it, which I found interesting, especially the realization that the seemingly effortless compassion and equanimity I perceive from him on the podcast actually rest on top of plenty of self-doubt and insecurity and the same reflexive inclination towards wanting to score points off your interlocutor rather than actually engage with them that I think a lot of us have. Which is kind of nice to realize, honestly. Hey, if he can do it despite all that, then maybe the rest of us can do it, too, right?Mostly, though, this book is about him sharing the things he's learned or realized through the process of making the podcast and talking to all these different people, many of whom he profoundly disagrees with. And his conclusions, while they're expressed in some fairly simple ways, are deeply insightful and really get at the heart of so many of the fundamental problems of our social media age. They're also incredibly helpful when it comes to sorting out my own conflicted thoughts and feelings about how to deal with all those people who are Wrong, Wrong, OMG So Wrong They're Part of Everything That's Wrong with the World Today, Aaaargh. In particular, his oft-repeated mantra that "empathy is not endorsement" may well be one of the most useful and comforting things I have ever heard anyone say.I'll note that you don't have to have listened to the podcast to appreciate the book, and I'd recommend it whether you have or not.