More Amusing Musings by the Lady Rev

By Carol R. Hermann

The Rev. Dr. Carol Hermann has been a Presbyterian minister for some thirty years and is now retired. She had been serving small churches in the south central area of Wisconsin. While she loves preaching, she also loves working with children and visiting shut-ins. Because of the many experiences she has had in her work, she started writing a column for a local newspaper. She often used those experiences as a sort of parable to make a point about our Christian faith. Many of those experiences have been shared in her sermons. Other ministers are invited to use them in their preaching, as well. Some of these experiences draw on our sense of humor, and some are far more serious, but they are all written in a way that will bring joy and love into someone’s life.
This book is dedicated in memory of her daughter, Becky, who gave her much encouragement in the writing of this book. It is hoped that this book will connect people closer to God.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: May 28, 2021
• ISBN: 9781664177697

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Copyright © 2021 by Carol R. Hermann.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to any actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

New Revised Standard Version Bible, copyright © 1989 the Division of Christian Education of the National Council of the Churches of Christ in the United States of America. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.

Rev. date: 05/27/2021

Xlibris

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CONTENTS

AMUSING MUSINGS FROM THE CHILDREN

Outward and Inward Appearances

Up In A Tree

Count Your Many Blessings

I Am The Church, You Are The Church

It’s Not Fair!

A Special Story

Who’s God?

A Change Of Heart

Who Owns The Church?

The Real Thing

For What Shall We Pray?

That Healing Touch

Lift Someone’s Burden

Keep Praying

Not So Amusing

Older Than God

Judge Not

OTHER AMUSING MUSINGS

A Helping Hand

An Embarrassing Moment

Unity in the Faith

That All Important Fork

The Real Stuff

Keeping in Touch

The 23rd Psalm

A Talking Donkey

Real Flowers

Are You Ready?

In The Eyes of the Beholder

Plant Some Seeds

No Steeples Needed!

A Place Of Security

A Good Fish Story

Fear No Evil

An Interesting Finding in Alaska

Always Give Thanks

A New Way of Seeing

Paying Those Dues

No ‘I’ In Team

Rumble Strips We Need

Thank God for Everything

MORE FROM THE CHILDREN

Amen!

A Cherry on Top

Let The Children Come to Me

Remember Who You Are

Wonderful Advice

Prophet or Profit?

Getting Rid of Pests

The Ten Commandments

Fishing for the Big Fish

Gifts for God

Brushing Up on the Teachings of Jesus

A FLOWER GIRL’S WORK

Think on These Things

Getting Fed

Sharing the Love of Jesus

A Time for Everything

The Surprise Inside

THE LORD’S SUPPER

The Broken Bread

No Communion Bread

Pouring the Wine

MORE AMUSING MUSINGS

A Home for the Sparrows and Swallows

David and the Giants

Amazing Love

Keeping the Leftovers

Those Golden Years

Lampstands or Churches?

I See the Moon

A Lesson from Lost Glasses

Choices, Choices, Choices

Shiphrah and Puah

The Most Important Thing

Messengers of Love

Defining A Christian

Unexpected Joy

History Can’t Be Changed

A Place of Security

A Wonderful Story

Great Stories

A Party to Remember

Neighbors

Oh God

Some Things Change

Descended Into Hell

Those Twelve Disciples

Time for A Timeout

A Parrot Story

Another Parrot Story

Knowing the Driver

A Sunday School Lesson

Knowing the Shepherd

Actions Speak Louder than Words

Amazing Grace

MUSINGS FOR OTHER TIMES OF THE CHURCH YEAR

St. Patrick’s Day

King Forevermore

Calling All Saints

A Lenten Oxymoron

Donkeys and Crosses

All Kinds of Saints

Giving Thanks for those Blessings

MUSINGS FOR THE CHRISTMAS SEASON

Keeping Christ In Christmas

Surprise Christmas Message

A Baby is Born in Bethlehem

Look at the Stars and Wonder

The Best Gift of All

MUSINGS FOR THE EASTER SEASON

A New Identification

Easter’s Arrival

Coverup Uncovered

Resurrection Eggs

An Old Legend

AMUSING MUSINGS FROM THE CHILDREN

OUTWARD AND INWARD APPEARANCES

A young mother popped in a biblical video for her toddler to watch while she went to another part of the house to do the laundry. The video was about Creation.

When she returned to her son, she was shocked to see that he had removed all of his clothes. As he stood there naked in front of the TV, she quickly asked him why he had taken off all of his clothes, and he replied, I, Adam.

Children like to pretend. At Halloween time, they will often pretend they are someone that they wish they could be. For example, at Halloween time, there will be ballerinas and clowns and also some football players. It is all pretend. That little boy only wanted to pretend that he was Adam.

The truth of the matter is that God doesn’t look on the outside, but rather, God looks on the inside and knows everything there is to know about us. Pretending is not necessary.

Remember that when a new king was to be selected, God told Samuel that God looks on the heart. God said: …for the LORD does not see as mortals see; they look on the outward appearance, but the LORD looks on the heart. We don’t need to be Adam, or a ballerina, or anything else, because God looks on our heart. So what is in your heart today?

Will God be pleased with that which is in our hearts?

UP IN A TREE

We once had a huge red maple tree beside our house. Our grand kids loved that tree. For them, the tree was a challenge, and whenever they came to visit, immediately they would rush out to climb the tree. There was a perpetual chair situated under one branch so that the younger ones could blimb on the chair to get up to the first branch. It was not unusual to see the grandkids sitting or standing at various places in that tree.

One time, eight year old Sarah, who was very competitive, managed to climb to the very top of that red maple tree. As she stood there, at the top of the tree, so proud of herself, who should come along but her Uncle Dan, who immediately, in his gruff policeman voice said, Sarah, you come down, and you come down right now. There was fear in his heart when he saw her at the top of the tree, and there was fear in her heart when she heard his gruff voice. Needless to say, she did come right down, never to climb to the top of that tree again—that we know of. But the one thing she learned for sure from that whole incident was that her Uncle Dan loved her and only wanted her to be safe.

Zacchaeus found himself in a similar situation. He had climbed a tree to have a better view of Jesus, who was passing by. It was Jesus, who ordered Zacchaeus to come down from the tree. Jesus loved Zacchaeus and wanted to go to his house. It was because of this, that Zacchaeus learned about the love of Jesus for him. Hopefully, we won’t need to climb a tree to learn about the love of Jesus, for that love is with us at all times in our lives.

COUNT YOUR MANY BLESSINGS

Everyone has a bad day now and then. One little girl said that it was a bad day for her when no one wanted to play with her and when she had nothing to do. For her, feeling alone made it a bad day. For some of us, it is a bad day when things don’t go as planned, and for those folks who have experienced horrible weather disasters, we know that everything seems to be bad.

When my mother had a bad day, she would say that she must have done something very displeasing to God, and that she was being punished for her actions. Many people believe that God punishes us for our sins. That is the theology of the Old Testament. In it, people believed that God would punish them for their sins.

However, when hurricanes strike, or other natural disasters strike, there are many people, both good and bad, who suffer. The good suffer with the bad. So let’s not blame God for those bad days we have.

The question is: what do we do when everything goes wrong and nothing goes right? One woman said that she takes out pictures of her grandkids and that makes her feel better. A church sign says: Don’t let the burdens of today erase the blessings of yesterday.

As that old hymn goes: Count your many blessings, name them one by one. Count your many blessings, see what God has done. God is right there beside us every step of the way. So when everything goes wrong and nothing goes right, God is with us. Jesus came to assure us that we are loved, no matter what. You see, God loves us all the time. All the time, God loves us and will never leave us all alone.

I AM THE CHURCH, YOU ARE THE CHURCH

The children in the choir had just learned the song, I am the church, you are the church, we are the church together. They also had learned motions to do as they sang the song. When they sang, I am the church, they would point at themselves. When they sang,