Phoenix
By Seema Jha
()
About this ebook
Seema Jha
Seema Jha is a prolific novelist who lives in Boston, Lincolnshire, UK with her husband and their son.
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Phoenix - Seema Jha
© 2021 Seema Jha. All rights reserved.
No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or
transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.
Published by AuthorHouse 04/20/2021
ISBN: 978-1-6655-8847-8 (sc)
ISBN: 978-1-6655-8846-1 (e)
Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models,
and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.
Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.
Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or
links contained in this book may have changed since publication and
may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those
of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher,
and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.
CONTENTS
Acknowledgements
Disclaimer
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Chapter 35
Dedicated to:
my father-in-law, Professor
Shankar Kumar Jha
and
my mother-in-law, Mrs Durga Devi
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
Thanks to my son Suyash Jha,
my late father, Professor Surya Kant Mishra,
my late mother, Mrs Shail Bala Mishra,
my late father-in-law, Professor
Shankar Kumar Jha,
my mother-in-law, Mrs Durga Jha,
my sister, Sushma Jha,
her late husband, Prabhakar Jha,
my brother, Sunil Mishra,
his wife, Ranjana Mishra,
my brother, Anil Mishra,
his wife, Priyanka Mishra, and
my sisters-in-law, Anu, Rupamji
and Poonam Didi,
Hiraji, Lal and Mohanjee, my brothers-
in-law for their encouragement.
A special thanks to my lovely neighbour
Sara Whitby for typing my
entire manuscript.
How can I not mention my neighbour,
Sara’s husband, Bob Baker for his
constant encouragement.
Last but not least my husband,
Dr Mithilesh Kumar Jha.
DISCLAIMER
All the characters are a product of my imagination. Inspiration might have been taken from life.
CHAPTER 1
You’re very direct, aren’t you,
Dolly gazed at the man before her. Fairly tall with broad shoulders and a good physique, his dishevelled hair gave him the look of an artist. There was something about the eyes which appeared extremely trustworthy. A thin nose, thin upper and slightly thicker lower lip sort of completed the picture. She looked at his thin eyebrows. He had just raised the left one.
I suppose I am,
Ram gazed at the girl before him. Soft, shimmering hair, large lovely eyes, a nose thin at the upper end, just a tad thicker at the lower end, the shape, a reverse of an upturned nose, a thin upper lip, a slightly thicker lower lip, pink, thick well shaped eyebrows. Flawless teeth. Breathtakingly beautiful without an iota of a doubt. Ram felt a little cross with himself. He had been scrutinising every part of her, which was both wrong and came under the label of bad manners surely. Assessing a girl’s looks in so much detail appeared in bad taste somehow. Yet he had done precisely that. In his defence he had fallen in love with her not merely for her exterior attributes but her inner kindness, politeness and most of all, her obvious fascination with him. Her constant gaze in his direction indicated as much in no uncertain measure.
I’m not exactly a dictionary, you know. What am I supposed to say,
she had lowered her gaze perhaps pondering over his question. He understood her dilemma. It was not one of those queries one could answer without a certain amount of hesitation. More so because they were almost strangers. A situation he would do his best to change.
It’s a simple enough question,
he gave her what he considered his piercing stare. Although one never really knew, she could have seen his glance as a hawkish glare. What one thought one looked like was totally different from what others thought one looked like.
It is, perhaps,
she was being evasive. That was hardly surprising. She was not yet at ease with him. That would take ages. If he was totally honest with himself, he wasn’t too comfortable with her himself. He would be soon but it hadn’t happened yet. After all, it was, in a manner of speaking, their first proper meeting. It was silly to expect miracles.
So why agonise with the answer,
he gave her a smile of encouragement. He did not want to give up that easily. Her face had creased momentarily. It was possible she thought he was too obstinate. Maybe he was. But in order to make progress of some sort, he did need to be perhaps slightly pushy. Then again, maybe not. He couldn’t quite decide.
It’s very abstract, this sort of thing. Difficult to provide a clear-cut answer.
At least she was still willing to talk. That was a good sign. She did have the option of getting up and leaving abruptly. She did not however make that choice. What was he to make of that. It did exhibit interest of some kind.
I guess you’re right but I’m still waiting,
he realised he was slouching and sat erect. He arched his eyebrows wondering if she was tiring of him already. How weird one’s brain was. One moment it told him she found him utterly fascinating, the other, it declared she found him downright awful.
Why don’t you define it yourself. You seem to be quite an expert,
he stiffened somewhat. It did appear as though he was annoying her. It was hard to tell. Her tiny smile reassured him. It was no doubt her attempt at humour.
Was that sarcasm. I hope not,
he spoke hesitantly. There was no expression on her face whatsoever. Once more, he felt a little unsure of himself. He was talking too much. She no doubt had had enough.
It wasn’t,
she appeared a bit self-conscious. Again, a good sign. If she didn’t care what he thought of her, she would not be trying to grip his attention with that little shake of her head that made her hair move to one side. So far, so good.
It’s the quick beating of my heart when you enter a room. It is the world coming to a stop when you smile at me. It is music that plays in my head every time you gaze at me. That’s love, I suppose,
she had a solemn look on her countenance. Maybe she had felt it was a bit much. Too mushy perhaps. By laying his feelings bare, had he overdone it. Some people got scared of the expression of too much emotion. Maybe she was one of them.
I guess it must be,
she appeared to be teasing him, not giving anything away. Concealing her thoughts, so to speak. Well, if it amused her, then who was he to stop her. And from what he had been told, men were from Mars and women from Venus. Maybe it was the girl’s way of making him more besotted than he already was. Not that that was possible.
When one says such a thing, one is looking for a reciprocation. You failed to provide it. Am I to assume then that you feel nothing. If so, I’m wounded deeply. I don’t quite know what else to say,
he tried to look sad although deep down he wasn’t. The fact that she had been more than willing to speak to him for as long as she had done, told its own story. She clearly liked him to some degree.
What do you think. I would very much like to know. Do you perceive in me something that gives an indication of this scary emotion, love. Tell me that,
her face was rather grave. Maybe it was just a front. A harmless act perhaps to make him restless. If so, it was working.
Why is that word frightening for you. As for noticing something in you that is a clear manifestation of love, I’m afraid I haven’t. I sincerely hope it isn’t that horrid thing, friendship. There’s my dirty word. That’s what you’re going to say next. We are pals, worse still, I think of you as a brother. I swear I’ll seriously contemplate suicide if that should turn out to be the case. Rest assured I’ll take my own life.
A bit of emotional blackmail couldn’t hurt. And in any case, all was fair in love and war. Or so he had been told. She lowered her gaze perhaps thinking about what he had said.
You’ve been listening to too many songs. Giving your life for someone ain’t easy, you know,
she sounded amused. She fixed her eyes on his face. Maybe she had heard the same sort of stuff from another admirer, worse still, a string of admirers. With a personality like hers, she could take her pick. Perhaps a beard would hasten matters. Maybe not. A stubble perhaps. He did not quite know.
You would be surprised. I intend to do precisely that.
She wasn’t taking him seriously. It would teach her a lesson when she was forced to look at his body with his wrist cut, blood oozing out. Dead as a dodo he would be, and she would be sorry.
You do exaggerate.
She tilted her head to one side, and played with a strand of her hair. Her eyes were downcast. He wondered if she was doing that to appear even more beautiful than she already was. It occurred to him that perhaps joining his hands together in a sophisticated sort of manner would make him appear more desirable. Why hesitate.
Perhaps. But you get my drift. I would do almost anything for you.
He was excited by the fact that her lovely eyes lingered on his face with a dream-like expression. Perhaps he was the dream she was seeing, her eyes wide awake. He was getting full of himself. He had to stop thinking those ridiculous thoughts.
For your cleaner’s daughter. What will society say,
she was giving him a scrutinising look. He realised his response was important to her. Exceedingly so. He would not disappoint her. That much was certain. It was as if their whole future together, if indeed there would be one, hinged on what he was about to say.
Let it shout from the rooftops that it’s all wrong. I don’t really care.
Her face appeared to have relaxed somewhat. Her lips quivered a little and turned into a tiny smile.
You say that now. If and when it all gets serious, you’ll change your tune,
she didn’t appear convinced. She was truly ravishing. Yet he could sense her insecurity. She couldn’t be blamed for the way her mind was working. By a financial yardstick, she was in a low class. That much could not be denied. Most so-called high class guys steered clear of such girls. That was a fact.
Am I to take that as a yes. In a roundabout sort of way, you’re admitting you do love me. At least, that is the conclusion I shall jump to, whether you approve or not,
he leaned forward and gave her the full thrust of what he considered his romantic glare. One never really knew. She may have seen his so-called amorous look as a creepy one. It was also possible that that sort of behaviour might frighten her.
I used the word ‘if’ too,
she did seem to like his company. She had not once looked at her watch, something she would have done if she had been tiring of his presence. So far it all looked positive.
I can read between the lines. The word ‘if’ didn’t mean anything really. The word ‘when’ however means a lot. Believe you me. I will never change. Be it my tune or my emotions. For me, love happens only once in a lifetime,
he looked at her in a gentle sort of way. A physical desire was trying to raise its head. He squashed it. He hardly knew her. To attempt anything of that nature could be disastrous. This was neither the time nor the place.
You have selective hearing, I suppose. You hear the words convenient to you and totally ignore the others. The ‘if’ I used means just as much as the ‘when’. I know this sounds like a cliché but there are many hurdles in our path. You know that as well as I do. Why pretend otherwise.
She met his gaze in a defiant sort of manner. There had been a tiny smile on her face as she had begun speaking but gradually she had started to look rather grave. The course of love never ran smooth. Who were they to complain.
If you knew me well enough, you would be aware that I don’t believe in a sham. Whatever I feel is out there,
he didn’t know if she would believe him. He looked at her face. No expression whatsoever.
Your sincere eyes will convince me even if your words don’t. There is an honesty in them I have seldom seen,
she appeared to be gauging his eyes and he felt a little self-conscious. Perhaps she thought men didn’t blush but he felt he might be doing precisely that at that moment.
That’s a step in the right direction, no doubt. I’m glad my eyes meet with your approval. Soon I’m sure the whole of me will. Dazzled by my devilishly handsome looks, you’ll soon surrender into my arms announcing your love in no uncertain manner. It’s only a matter of time. I can wait.
He couldn’t help thinking that that shy moment of his had passed rather fast. Which was just as well. Girls didn’t want a shy bloke. At least, most didn’t. Thank God he wasn’t one.
I don’t know about the devilishly handsome bit but I can say without doubt that you are terribly conceited,
she