Connie: One Woman’s Triumph over Abuse

By Terri M. Sanders

Connie Hinton manages to free herself from a dangerous situation. She escapes an abusive marriage to a volatile, and increasingly dangerous man, who is becoming more and more unbalanced. She manages to rebuild her life in a new town, making new friends and finding relevancy, love and trust even as her ex-husband, Evan, is descending deeper into madness. Evan is hateful and angry. Evan is set on teaching Connie a lesson that no one in that town will soon forget!

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Jul 14, 2020
• ISBN: 9781984587848

Terri M. Sanders

Terri Sanders was born and raised in the Dallas/Fort Worth area. After a 26 year career as a police dispatcher, Terri is quietly retired. She continues to reside in Texas along with her husband and two cats, and continues to write fiction that inspires her. This is her second novel. 'Joe and the Agenda' was released April, 24, 2019.

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Copyright © 2020 by Terri M. Sanders.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to any actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.

Rev. date: 07/14/2020

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Contents

Preface

1 The Early Years

2 From Bad to Worse

3 The Final Split

4 Becoming Centered

5 Tommy

6 Sandy

7 Missy

8 The Intruder

9 Luke

10 Thanks to God and Debbie!

11 A Change of Heart

12 The Boutique

13 The House

14 The Date

15 Mysterious Ways

16 The Second Encounter

17 Hero

18 Easy Saturday!

19 A Laid Back Dinner

20 Arlington

21 Turkey Day!

22 Dismal Christmas

23 Every Effort

24 Oscar and Felix

25 A Sudden Coldness!

26 The Party Pooper

27 Life After Evan

To Jake, for restoring my faith in love.

Preface

Ephesians 5:24

Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

I believe this bible verse is widely misused to remind women of their place in the household ruled by abusive husbands. Physical, mental and emotional abuse are completely destructive to moral and self esteem.

However, we don’t hear the next verse discussed, nearly as often.

Ephesians 5:25

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her.

It is my belief that if more men took this verse to heart as God meant it, Ephesians 5:24 would rarely be an issue. I believe that there is a part of every woman that longs to be cherished as this verse suggests. It is by God’s design.

It is my hope that those who suffer at the hands of abusers draw inspiration from this book to seek guidance and develop self esteem.

Holy Bible, New International Version, NIV, 2011

Thanks to Malcom Ollie Mal Couch Jr. and his insightful teaching of the bible that made it all so very clear for me, and so many others!

Thanks to my sister, Missy, who had the courage to leave and giving me inspiration for this book.

Thanks to God for giving me strength and confidence.

1

THE EARLY YEARS

Connie Hinton recognized the irritated look on her husband, Evan’s handsome face, and she knew she was in for another painful argument with him. She sat on the edge of a big flat rock and enjoyed the breeze for a few moments, and braced herself.

Why are you even here? Evan started in. Connie had to think about that. It was nice today. The sunlight played across the water like liquid glitter, and the temperature was definitely on the warm side. It would be in the mid nineties by 2:00 PM. That was okay for Quitman, Texas. She could handle the mid nineties in the shade. 108 in mid-August, though, with no breeze, was a bit too much for Connie to take, but then she never did enjoy the heat of the Texas summers as much as Evan did.

I’m here, because you’re here, Evan, and I want to be with you. Is that so bad? She asked.

She watched his face as he considered his response. He was sitting in full sun. No shade for him, at all. His tanned skin was taut and rippled with muscles across his chest and upper arms. The sweat that ran down his arms left streaks in dust and motor oil, smudged around the tattoos on his arms. He had a wolf on the right forearm and an eagle on the left forearm, with his wings spread.

Evan was the only man she had ever known that actually used a bleach product on his hair. Rather than a mix of natural sun streaked blonde, and light brown shades, his hair was a bright yellow shade of blonde that was really a bit too light and much too bright for him. He was half Caddo Indian and half Irish on his father’s side. His skin tone was not really flattered by that hair color but she had never said so.

Give me a break, Connie, please! He gave her a heavy sigh and an exasperated look.

It seemed strange to Connie that although she had been married to this man for 12 years now, she spent a lot of time daydreaming about him, as if one day he might actually be hers.

He was quite a handsome man, at 5’11, 200 pounds, with big expressive hazel eyes, and a mustache. He was in good shape, and kept his body in good condition, working out and jogging.

Evan once had an attractive smile, but more and more all Connie saw was an evil angry tight grin or angry grimace. He was quite volatile, more and more unpredictable, and more aggressive with each passing day.

Are you saying you don’t want me around? I was hoping you and I could have a quiet day, together, tomorrow. Do we have to have your friends over? Connie asked.

He continued to work on the boat motor. His big green eyes were intent on the task at hand, and his face was full of determination.

I’m not cancelling the party tomorrow, Connie. In fact, I was hoping you would go to your sister’s house tomorrow. Your presence is an embarrassment to me, Evan replied, never looking up from the repair he was attempting on the motor.

What a thing to say to your wife! Connie replied, looking downtrodden and disappointed.

You haven’t been a real wife to me in some time, Connie. If you were, you would have lost that weight by now! Evan barked back at her.

The correct weight for a 5’7 woman is between 137-154 pounds, Evan. I weigh 140!" Connie replied.

Well, you look tired. You look like a tired old pig! Evan replied.

You look okay from here down to here. He demonstrated with one hand at the top of his head and the second hand just below the breast area.

Just okay, mind you, nothing spectacular! he said. He shook his head at her and turned his attention back to the boat motor.

His words always cut like a knife and he seemed to take pleasure in it. The more Connie tried to be pleasant, the more Evan seemed to tear her down. She felt like crying, but she was determined not to give him the satisfaction. Connie pinned her hair up with a barrette, to get it off her neck.

You look stupid with your hair like that, Evan was quick to point out.

Connie had heard enough!

Well, I guess that makes us about even, then, she replied.

What the hell is that supposed to mean? His eyes were big and centered on her now, obviously perturbed.

I mean that fake yellow color makes you look like you’re wearing a toupee. It looks stupid. It doesn’t go with your coloring or your complexion. It just looks fake! Connie finally admitted.

Evan raised his eyebrows at her; his eyes were wide and angry. She had seen that look before, usually just before he punched her. He rolled his eyes.

Connie, it’s always better to be thought a fool, than to open your mouth and prove the point, Evan replied. His attention was once again on the boat motor. Why don’t you get the hell out of here so I can get this motor fixed? he shouted.

I wonder if he will ever buy another boat motor. I can imagine him out here in the heat working on that same 70 hp motor, long after the company goes out of business, and parts were not so easy to find. What a concept to actually be able to fish, instead of repairing that motor every time they went fishing.

Connie knew she had angered Evan, and decided to go back to the trailer and read, before he really lost his temper and became violent. She stood up, stretched, and turned to start the trek back up the rocky trail to their small single wide trailer Evan purchased for their lake lot. It wasn’t fancy, but the trailer was neat, modern and comfortable. It beat shelling out money for a hotel, and served the couple well on many weekends.

If Connie could have seen the hate filled look in Evan’s eyes at that moment she most likely would have run, but her back was to him.

She wasn’t moving fast enough to suit Evan. She leaned over to pick up her tumbler of tea, and a wrench hit the back of her head as she stood up. It startled her and threw her off balance. He threw it just hard enough to cause a good size goose egg knot on her head and it bled a bit.

It gave her a fantastic headache, but the worst part was that she pitched forward and fell face-first on the rock she had been sitting on. It bruised her cheek, busted her lip, and knocked a tiny chip from the top edge on the backside of one of her bottom front teeth.

Get the hell out of here! Evan shouted.

Connie quietly complied, and climbed the trail slowly, back to the trailer.

The cool air hit her in the face when she opened the door to the trailer. They ran the air conditioning non-stop in the summer, when they were there.

Connie looked up to see her winning bass hanging on the wall, and smiled to herself. Lake Fork yielded some mighty large record big mouth bass. Connie actually won a tournament on this lake last spring. She came in to weigh-in with 4 fish, although it was only the largest 3 that counted. Evan spent a good deal of time working on that same boat motor while she caught the 2 largest fish that won her the $1500.00 top prize. Evan managed to get the motor started, and got them back to weigh-in just before the weigh-in closed. The total for her 3 fish was 12 pounds, 2 ounces. She looked at Evan with a satisfied smile.

He had complained that he didn’t want her along.

You’re just gonna want to go back to shore and pee every 30 minutes, and be a pain in the ass, while I’m trying to fish! Evan complained.

Of course if the boat hadn’t stalled out by the dam, she would not have been in a position to catch the winning fish. More than likely, if Evan had been fishing instead of working on the boat motor, he might have won the tournament, instead. He was more knowledgeable and skilled at catching fish than she was, by far.

Nevertheless, she had won that tournament, and she enjoyed her moment, especially since she was the only woman in the tournament. She had very few proud moments, it seemed.

A picture was taken of her holding the check, for the local paper. Connie could have easily done without the picture. It brought on another round of disgusted glances and derogatory comments from Evan, causing her to wonder once again how they got to this point.

It wasn’t always this way. She almost wished they had never married. Things were good when they were dating. He had actually told her that he thought she was too good for him a couple of weeks prior to their wedding, and that had upset her. She didn’t want him to feel that way. She would have preferred that their marriage be a partnership in every sense of the word.

To her surprise, however, she didn’t have to be concerned about it. He had made the decision already and it wasn’t to be a partnership.

On their honeymoon, he let loose a barrage of insults, before they even unpacked their bags in the hotel room, about how fat and unattractive she was. Connie was shocked and hurt.

I did not deceive you, Evan! she shouted.

In fact, I don’t recall that you have ever expressed any discontent at all! Connie added.

She didn’t expect this. He had never behaved this way towards her, ever!

She thought maybe she should have bitten the bullet and bought the strapless gown she found on sale that looked so good on her. She compromised and opted for the simpler dress, so they would have more spending cash in California. One dress was strapless and a bit more garnished, but both were nice.

The main factor driving her decision was that this was to be a quick wedding before a justice of the peace, a quick exchange of vows. There was to be no big party, and nothing fancy. In fact, given this scenario, the dress she did choose to purchase, was a bit too fancy for the venue.

To Evan, however, the gown she chose may have been unflattering enough that it would leave an unforgettable ugly image in his mind. That’s crazy! She thought to herself. That dress was quite pretty, and looked nice on her.

She recalled that as they were exchanging their vows, was the first time she noticed it…that disapproving glance of his. She could think of no other reason for his disapproval but she had begun to suspect, even that early in the marriage that Evan may have some mental and emotional problems, causing his erratic behavior.

She found herself in the restroom of the hotel room, that evening, looking at herself in the mirror.

What did I get myself into? Connie wondered. Her parents had spent a good deal of money on this honeymoon trip for them to Anaheim, California, and Disneyland.

She was nineteen years old, 5’7, and 140 pounds. She was a bit top heavy, with thick shoulder length brown hair and big brown eyes, with a bit of gold flecks. She had a nice clear complexion and she loved to laugh. She was compassionate, perceptive and loving.

She had been told by other men that she was pretty. She was not a gorgeous model, but she knew better than to believe that she was ugly. She fought back the tears.

It was their wedding night. Why couldn’t he show a little affection? It wouldn’t hurt him to at least smile! Connie thought. She was determined to enjoy this trip, in spite of Evan’s sudden change of behavior. She had never been to California. The weather was perfect. It was September 4th. It was 85 degrees and everything in Anaheim was gorgeous.

Although she was quite hurt, and strongly considered repacking her bags and going back to Texas to file for an annulment, she was determined to enjoy this trip. She bit her tongue, and decided to deal with this later. She dried her eyes and walked back into the room, settled in a big fluffy side chair at the foot of the bed and tilted her head back. She didn’t intend to sleep but Evan was shaking her awake a couple of hours later.

Let’s go get a steak! he said, referring to the nice steakhouse and bar next door to the hotel they were staying at. Connie found it incredible that he was actually smiling now, like nothing had ever happened.

Connie decided to let the argument slide to the back burner, for now. She did not want to spend the next week fighting, hundreds of miles away from her family and friends, with no moral support.

Years later, she would look at the photo that she kept in her billfold that was taken at Disneyland the day after she married Evan. It was a picture of her standing next to a dwarf. He was one of many costumed characters strolling around the grounds at Disneyland, greeting patrons. Connie suspected he was supposed to be one of the dwarves from the ‘Snow White’ tale. The dwarf had his arm around her shoulder. Photographs generally put 15-20 pounds on anyone, yet she looked pretty, and quite slim in this picture. She managed a smile for the camera.

It would be the first of many such photographs, with a forced smile, because she was so hopeful she would see more of the Evan she was so much in love with. The Evan she had dated that was always smiling. The hurt and bruised emotions, as traumatic as they were, didn’t seem nearly so bad the next morning. She learned to swallow her pride and shrug it off to avoid discontent, always hoping things would improve, and sometimes they did, but it was always short lived, and usually followed by physical abuse. Sometimes the old Evan would surface and he was kind and gentle. She loved being with him, but she realized that she was seeing less and less of the old Evan as the months turned to years.

Connie would cry her heart out, but only when she was alone. Instinctively, she knew never to show Evan how much he hurt her with his cruel words, and erratic actions.

She went through the motions. She went to work, putting in a lot of hours. She came home, cooked, cleaned, and she read a lot of books. She and Evan shared a home in Arlington Texas, about 5 miles from her family, so she was able to spent a lot of time with her family. She worked on arts and crafts, with her mother and sister and it helped her to get her mind off her predicament with Evan, if only for a while. She was willing to accept and minimize the verbal, mental and increasing physical abuse. It set the stage for a cycle that would continue for years, never improving.

Deep down inside, though, she knew better. She knew things weren’t as they should be. She kept the picture of herself with the dwarf in her billfold as a constant reminder to herself of how things actually were, and then there was how Evan tried to convince her that things were.

There was a big difference in the two.

She tried not to think about how alone she felt.

2

FROM BAD TO WORSE

Connie never had friends over. She didn’t trust Evan not to humiliate her in front of everyone so she played it safe and never had anyone over at all, other than family, occasionally. Evan was a heavy drinker and had a constant party going with all the neighbors.

Connie longed to be close to him, but whenever she would try and show him even casual affection, he would push her away.

Eventually, he started sleeping more on the couch, because Connie couldn’t stand the smell of the alcohol on his sour breath when he was drunk, and she would move in the middle of the night to the couch. One night, Evan slapped her two or three times and threw her to the ground demanding to know why she wasn’t in bed and she finally admitted to him that she hated that smell of alcohol on his breath and that was why she moved.

He pulled her up off the ground by her hair and demanded she go back to bed, and she lay there, quietly crying while he slept facing away from her.

There were several times that she tried to fix herself up and set a romantic mood, to no avail. She made the mistake of thinking she could coax the old Evan out again. The last time she made an attempt with candlelight and provocative clothing, he had actually laughed at her.

Humiliated, she decided it was a lost cause, and so they settled into a routine of having sex only when Evan initiated it. When they did have sex, it was great, but at the end of the day, Connie ended up feeling like she was someone that Evan turned to only out of desperate need, and not out of love.

She had lost 25 pounds and Evan had complained that she was gaining even more weight and he was embarrassed to be seen with her. A year had passed and she gained 15 pounds back and Evan sent her two dozen roses.

She couldn’t figure him out. His reasoning made no sense. She was starting to realize that although she had lost some weight overall, and struggled with it, Evan seemed to be using that issue to control what she ate and when she ate it. She worked so many hours, however, that he could only control her eating when she was at home, and that frustrated him.

Then suddenly, without warning, the old Evan would surface and he would insist on taking her out to