A Gangster & a Baller: A Tale of 2 Big Homies

By Tyrone Pierson

A Gangster & A Baller (A Tale Of 2 Big Homies) is the powerful conclusion to the Platinum Dreams trilogy. It includes the screenplay, the official soundtrack, & the 3rd episode from Tyrone Piersons new Atlanta based sitcom Son Of Superman.
When Tyreal North gets out of prison, he hopes to STAY out of prison, & sell his television show. In search of a better life, he moves to Atlanta, & ends up meeting two big homies. One of them is a Gangster from California, & the other one is a Baller from Minneapolis. The Baller doesnt want him associating with the Gangster, & the Gangster doesnt want him socializing with the Baller. Eventually, Tyreal realizes the Baller represents God in his life, & the Gangster represents the devil in his life. And theyre competing for his soul.
After Tyreal starts a secret society for Alpha Males, he meets a Alpha Feminist, who appears to be the dream wife from hell. With one foot in the church, & the other foot in the street, Tyreal works in the day, & hustles at night, until hes able to secure his dream job at Turner Broadcasting System. The Baller is happy for him, but the Gangster attempts to sabotage his victory. When it builds up to a spiritual showdown between good & evil, there are multiple casualties, but Tyreal is able to come out victorious.
A Gangster & A Baller surgically interlocks the lives of a Angel, a Demon, a Super Hero, a War Hero, & a Drug War Survivor , as it professionally articulates how far a man must go to bulletproof his Dreams & survive spiritual warfare. From near-death experiences & conspiracy theories, to gang activity & paranormal activity, this is unequivocally one of the most awesome success stories ever written!!

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Jul 24, 2015
• ISBN: 9781504923859

Tyrone Pierson

Tyrone Pierson is a ultra-educated, inner-city Super Hero, who lives in Atlanta, Georgia. He has been thru hell & back, but it just made him a better man, a better writer, & a better leader. Mr. Pierson is also an accredited motivational speaker, community activist, & business owner.

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© 2015 Tyrone Pierson. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

Published by AuthorHouse 07/23/2015

ISBN: 978-1-5049-2386-6 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-5049-2385-9 (e)

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models,

and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

TABLE OF CONTENTS

Chapter 1- Apocalyptic Nightmare

Chapter 2- Released From Prison

Chapter 3- Back In The Hood

Chapter 4- Property Damage

Chapter 5- The Mall Of America

Chapter 6- Speed Dating

Chapter 7- Return Of A Soldier

Chapter 8- Breach Of Security

Chapter 9- The After Party

Chapter 10- The Friendship Killer

Chapter 11- The Alpha Feminist

Chapter 12- The Race-Card Player

Chapter 13- Transaction With A Drug Lord

Chapter 14- Monumental Newsbreak

Chapter 15- War Hero Sex

Chapter 16- Kissing Cousins

Chapter 17- Suspicious Behavior

Chapter 18- The Snowstorm Murders

Chapter 19- Addicted To The High Life

Chapter 20- Heartbreak Café

Chapter 21- Girls Just Wanna Have Fun

Chapter 22- A Major Collapse

Chapter 23- The Pool Party

Chapter 24- The Heart Attack

Chapter 25- Last Day Of Freedom

Chapter 26- The Speedy Trial

Chapter 27- Time To Relocate

Chapter 28- No Such Thing As Coincidence

Chapter 29- The Break-Up

Chapter 30- False Imprisonment

Chapter 31- Welcome To Atlanta

Chapter 32- The Air Force Shootout

Chapter 33- The Prey Hunting The Predator

Chapter 34- The Baller From Church

Chapter 35- The Gangster From Cali

Chapter 36- Snoman’s Party

Chapter 37- Escape From Reality

Chapter 38- Alpha Male v.s. Alpha Feminist

Chapter 39- Fight Game Initiation

Chapter 40- The Top Guns

Chapter 41- The Alpha Club

Chapter 42- The Trap House

Chapter 43- You Can’t Hustle A Hustler

Chapter 44- Good Pimp, Bad Pimp

Chapter 45- Side Effects Of The Struggle

Chapter 46- Bully Killer Diplomacy

Chapter 47- Grown Man Diplomacy

Chapter 48- From Tragedy To Triumph

Chapter 49- Grocery Store Gangsterism

Chapter 50- The Follow-Up Visit

Chapter 51- You Get No Stripes Off Me

Chapter 52- The Lenox Mall

Chapter 53- The Speed Demon

Chapter 54- Business Management

Chapter 55- A Veteran Cockblocker

Chapter 56- Blame It On The Alcohol

Chapter 57- The Origin Of Jaron’s Racism

Chapter 58- The Steakhouse

Chapter 59- Predatory Nature

Chapter 60- Alpha Male Society

Chapter 61- 1st Lady

Chapter 62- Game For A Lame

Chapter 63- That Aint Even Playerish

Chapter 64- Dinner With Big Homies

Chapter 65- The Burglary

Chapter 66- Apologetic Seduction

Chapter 67- The Deal Breaker

Chapter 68- Freeloader Syndrome

Chapter 69- The Voicemail

Chapter 70- Self-Inflicted Injury

Chapter 71- A Productive Conversation

Chapter 72- The Dope Game Chronicles

Chapter 73- The Wake-Up Call

Chapter 74- A Hummer & A Homicide

Chapter 75- A Gangster Ass Barbecue

Chapter 76- Undercover Boss

Chapter 77- Drama At The Bat Cave

Chapter 78- Thunderstorm Sex

Chapter 79- Breakfast At Church

Chapter 80- Working For Stripes

Chapter 81- Sister Talk

Chapter 82- Fired On The Spot

Chapter 83- The Homies In Prison

Chapter 84- Triple Shooting

Chapter 85- The Perfect Vacation

Chapter 86- Family Reunion

Chapter 87- The Alpha Code

Chapter 88- Power Outage

Chapter 89- Paranormal Activity

Chapter 90- Hot Tub Club

Chapter 91- Working With A Hangover

Chapter 92- The Exit Sign

Chapter 93- Overintoxicated Mistake

Chapter 94- Miliana’s Birthday

Chapter 95- Code Blue

Chapter 96- Full Disclosure

Chapter 97- Multiple Orgasms

Chapter 98- Cocaine Anonymous

Chapter 99- The Revenge Murders

Chapter 100- When The Gunsmoke Clears

Chapter 101- Special Operation

Chapter 102- Conspiracy Theory

Chapter 103- War Stories

Chapter 104- Alpha Policy

Chapter 105- The Stakeout

Chapter 106- Home For The Holidays

Chapter 107- Christmas Eve Smoke Out

Chapter 108- All I Want For Christmas

Chapter 109- Time To Say Goodbye

Chapter 110- Unsolved Mystery

Chapter 111- The Wild Card Job

Chapter 112- A Dream Come True

Chapter 113- Satanic Ceremony

Chapter 114- The Hostages

Chapter 115- The Spiritual Showdown

Chapter 116- The Freedom Fighters

Chapter 117- The Victory Dinner

Chapter 118- Mission Accomplished

Chapter 119- Bracing For The Storm

Chapter 120- A Blessing From Above

Chapter 121- The Tables Have Turned

Chapter 122- Fatherly Advice

Chapter 123- Sisterly Advice

Chapter 124- The Audition Of A Lifetime

Chapter 125- The Conference Room

Chapter 126- The X-Ray Results

Chapter 127- A Surprise Visit

Chapter 128- The Houseguest

Chapter 129- Armageddon

Chapter 130- The Road To Redemption

Chapter 131- Grown Man Shit

Chapter 132- Super Hero’s Never Die

A Gangster & A Baller

(The Official Motion Picture Soundtrack)

Song/Artist

Gangsters & Ballers- (By Tyreal North)

The Homewood- (By Platinum Knight, feat. Tyreal North)

Welcome To My World- (By Platinum Knight, feat. Tyreal North)

Stay In School- (By Platinum Knight)

Minneapolis Pride- (By Knight Rider)

Even Church Girls Go Bad- (By Platinum Knight, feat. Tyreal North)

Miss Minnesota- (By Tyreal North)

Cougar Of The Year- (By Tyreal North, feat. Platinum Knight)

Animal Magnetism- (By Tyreal North)

Death Before Slavery- (By Trayshawn Rider)

Your Honor- (By Platinum Knight)

Time Runnin’ Out- (By Trayshawn Rider)

Good v.s. Evil- (By Tyreal North)

The Alpha Male- (By Tyreal North, feat. Platinum & Trayshawn)

Hater Proof- (By Tyreal North)

Son Of Superman

Road Trip To Miami

(Part 1)

Scene Breakdown

Son Of Superman – About The Show

(Tyroy’s House)

(Tyroy’s House)

(Tyroy’s House)

(The Trap)

(The Carter)

(Vanessa’s House)

(The R.V.)

(Tyroy’s House)

(Welfare Burger)

(Tyroy’s House)

(The R.V.)

(The R.V.)

(The Gas Station)

(The R.V.)

A Gangster & A Baller

(A Tale Of 2 Big Homies)

Chapter 1

Apocalyptic Nightmare

At a gun shop in Los Angeles, CA, it’s just another ordinary day in the world of gun trafficking. The Apocalypse is a family owned gun store, run by Ryan Right Wing McCloskey, & his two sons Matthew & Bradley. Ryan’s daughter Kelly works there Monday thru Friday, but since today is Saturday, she’s off spending time with her husband at a bed & breakfast in Beverly Hills. So today, it’s just the guys. Matthew & Bradley are assisting customers interested in purchasing pistols & shotguns, while Ryan is at the cash register running a customer’s credit card. When it’s approved, Ryan puts the receipt in the bag, along with the box containing a 9mm Berretta.

Ryan- There you go, you’re all set. Thank you for doing business with us.

Dave- Have a good one.

David Harris walks out of the gun store excited about surprising his son with a Berretta for his 21st birthday. He has no idea that there’s a hurricane of gunfire coming his way, just over a mile away. Back inside The Apocalypse, Brad McCloskey uses his key to unlock a glass case, so he can retrieve a .40 caliber Ruger for a customer. Before he hands it to the man, he pulls the slide back & examines it to make sure it’s not loaded, then he hands it to the customer. The customer looks at the price tag. $439.99. Since he is a straw buyer, buying this gun to resell on the street for a profit, he’s calculating how much he’ll have to sell it for once he puts his fee on it.

Straw Buyer- Does this come with an extended clip?

Brad- No sir. It comes with 2 ten round magazines. We don’t sell any extended mags, but you could probably find some online, or at a gun show. Or maybe even a pawn shop.

As the straw buyer looks over the Ruger, that hurricane of gunfire blows through the front door, causing him to aim the empty firearm at the front door, just off reflex. Ten men, all dressed in red, & wearing ski masks, come barging into the gun shop holding automatic weapons. They don’t waste any time, or allow anyone inside to run or pull their own weapon. It’s apparent that this was no random invasion. When the straw buyer realizes that his gun isn’t loaded, & their guns more than likely are, he drops the Ruger on the floor by his feet & puts his hands up. Judging by the speed & fluency of their entrance, they had this all planned out long before they carried it out. Each gunman immediately rushes into his quadrant with his gun pointed at anything deemed hostile. The 1st two gunmen run toward Ryan at the register, the 3rd & 4th gunmen run toward Matthew behind the closest counter to the door, then the 5th & 6th gunmen through the door, run straight to Brad behind the back counter. The 7th & 8th gunmen order the customers to get on the floor & put their hands behind their backs so they can be handcuffed. The 9th gunman locks the door, turns the Open sign around so it reads Closed, & then he stands post next to the door & plays the look out. And then there’s the 10th gunman. Gardena. Armed with a Heckler & Koch MP-5, he assumes command as the General. As the brains behind the operation, Gardena knows that the only person who should be talking right now, is him. Anybody that breaks protocol, won’t make it out alive. He specifically recruited the pawns for this mission, so if anything goes wrong, he won’t have to worry about losing any of his Lieutenants or Sergeants. Although each & every one of the lil’ homies he hand picked are qualified, each & every one of them is dispensable. He can easily replace them with the next generation of soldiers trying to earn stripes for the gang. Ryan McCloskey is even more terrified than his sons & customers, because he’s had nightmares about this longer than they’ve been alive. The main thing, is for him not to panic. In times like this, the rule of thumb is, give the man with the gun whatever he wants.

Ryan- Just take what you want. Nobody’s gunna try to stop you. Can I help you?

Gardena- Yeah, you can shut the fuck up, & give me the keys.

Ryan- Which keys?

Gardena- I want all the glass cases unlocked, & I want all the shotguns & assault rifles unlocked.

Ryan- Okay. Do you want me to unlock ’em for you.

Gardena- No, you can sit’cho ass down somewhere. And don’t move. Don’t speak unless I tell you to speak. Ya got that?

Ryan- Got it. (Gives Gardena the keys)

Gardena- Anybody try ta be a hero, you gunna be a dead hero.

Once they have the employees & customers subdued, they walk outside & open the back of the U-Haul moving truck. They start grabbing blankets & bringing them back inside the gun shop until the back of the truck is empty. Once they have the blankets spread out on the floor, they are able to load guns on them, wrap them up, & set the blanket to the side so they can load the next blanket. As soon as they come out with the 1st blanket, there’s a good chance somebody will see them & report it. So the plan is to load all the blankets, & then carry them back to the U-Haul truck all at once. The lookout posted at the door keeps checking his stop watch, so every time one minute goes by, he let’s his gang know. Since this heist is time-sensitive, it’s important for them to know how they’re doing for time. Especially since it’s broad daylight, & customers from the surrounding businesses are observing them walk in & out the gun store with ski masks on. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out what they’re up to. Once all the large caliber handguns are loaded into the truck, they start packing up & moving out the shotguns & machine guns. Once that’s taken care of, the only thing they want now are the assault rifles & boxes of ammunition. The AK-47’s & AR-15’s are so big, they can only take about 9 or 10 of them in each trip. And it’s taking longer for the assault rifles, because Gardena has instructed them to load a dozen 30-round banana clips before they walk out with the choppers. If something goes wrong, he knows they’ll be the weapons of choice for war with the LAPD. Once they have 12 banana clips loaded, they’re ready to start carrying out the 9 blankets. When they’re loading the 8th blanket, with the 2nd shipment of assault rifles, things take a turn for the worst. One of the gangsters looks up, & sees a police car speeding into the parking lot.

Damu- Look Blood, there go the po-po.

The other gangsters outside see the squad car. The look out posted at the door sees the police car & tells Gardena, who is inside preparing to transport the last blanket to the truck. Gardena doesn’t say anything, he just casually grabs the MP-5 he came in with, & walks up to look out the door. When he sees there’s only one squad car, he doesn’t even hesitate to make his move. He runs outside, straight up to the cop car, & opens fire. Spraying bullets thru the windshield. Once he starts shooting, two more of the gangsters realize it’s their cue, so they run up on the police car & start airing it out. Ultimately killing the 2 officers inside before they even got a shot off. The cop car keeps rolling out of control until it crashes into a parked car. Now that their cover is blown, they know they need to abort the mission & get gone. Fast. You can hear police sirens in the distance as the driver jumps into the driver seat of the U-Haul, & one of the gangsters hops into the passenger seat, eager to flee the scene. While the rest of the gangsters are inside the gun shop getting ready to load the last shipment of assault rifles into the truck, two more police cars come speeding into the parking lot. Luckily for the gangsters, the 12 fully loaded banana clips are in the blanket with the AK-47’s. They set the blanket down & start inserting clips into the rifles. Gardena & 4 of his soldiers cock the AK’s, walk out the front door, & run up on the police cars, shooting 7.62x39mm bullets thru each of the squad cars. The other 3 gangsters inside the gun store carry the last blanket to the back of the U-Haul truck & dump everything into the back. Then they start loading all of the assault rifles with banana clips, while their homies hold off the police. Just that fast, 3 more police cars have pulled up to the scene. When they see the condition of the other officers, they don’t pull up into the parking lot. They immediately call for back up, get out of their car, & use it as a protective shield. With guns drawn, they begin returning fire with handguns, unaware that the people they are firing at have high powered assault rifles. Gardena & his soldiers start running up on the officers hiding behind their patrol cars. Now the officers realize what they are up against, & pray for help. Their only hope is for their back up to arrive in time. Unfortunately, Gardena has been prepping his team for this same scenario for weeks, so this exercise is nothing more to them than a video game that they’ve been playing over & over in their mind. There’s no way they’re interested in making this a long, drawn out firefight with the LAPD. So their only intention is to get this over with as quickly as possible, before every cop in the city shows up. They know the officers are on the other side, so they don’t want their footsteps to be heard, so they run up on the cop cars shooting. One of the gangsters drops to the ground so he can see underneath the cop car. He sees one of the officers crouched down on the other side, so he shoots beneath the car & hits the officer in his leg. Back at the U-Haul, the driver cranks up the engine & drives off in the direction of the 3 remaining police cars. While everybody in the vicinity is running for cover, the 3 gangsters in the back of the U-Haul have the rest of the assault rifles loaded with 30-round banana clips. They jump out & assist their friends. Four of the gangsters go right, & three of the gangsters follow Gardena to the left. When the four gangsters run around to shoot at the officers hiding on the other side, it creates a diversion for the other four gangsters. The officers hear where the shots are coming from, & direct their attention that way, unaware that Gardena & 3 more gangsters are coming from behind to kill them. Once all of the officers are bleeding to death, & no longer a threat, the gangsters run to the waiting U-Haul truck & jump into the back. Gardena shuts the door & makes sure it’s locked, while one of the gangsters bangs on the wall behind the drivers seat. When the driver hears the banging, he speeds off. Using the Garmin navigation, he’s able to get to the nearest freeway, & follow the turn by turn directions all the way to the destination. In 22 minutes, they arrive at a warehouse, where they are able to take their time & unload the country’s biggest firepower heist of the new millennium. American Gangster by Twista starts to play.

Chapter 2

Released From Prison

In Rush City, Minnesota, Tyreal North is finally experiencing the happiest day of his life. He’s being released from prison after a 6 year sentence. And not only is this his release date, it’s his expiration date. So he truly is a free man. No parole. No probation. Just freedom. As he’s leaving his cell, & walking past the other cells en route to the c.o. desk up front, he knows that this is the moment he’s been dreaming about for the last 72 months. At Rush City Correctional Facility, some of the inmates are locked in their cell, looking thru the glass window in their cell door, shouting at him to get out there & do it big for them. He just throws up two peace signs for them as he keeps it moving towards his freedom. But on his way out, his victory lap is ruined by another inmate, who also happens to be leaving. The swamper is crying, & begging him not to leave.

Luscious- Don’t leave me! Please, I love you!

Titus- I love you too, boo.

Luscious- Then don’t leave me. I need you. I’m nothing without you.

Titus- Yes you are, don’t say that. I gotta go though, I got my family waiting for me.

Luscious- I need you to hold me, & kiss me like you’ll never see me again.

They hug & kiss. At this point, Tyreal is thoroughly disgusted.

Tyreal- Aint that a bitch. These dudes is sweet as bear meat. Hold on Adam & Steve. Aint nobody try’n ta see all that.

C.O.- Hey, lovebirds, that’s enough! Mr. Shannon, do you wanna go home or not?!

Titus thinks to himself while Luscious waits for his response.

Titus- No, I’m staying.

C.O.- What?

Tyreal- What?

Titus- I’m staying with my man.

Luscious- I knew you were my soul mate.

They hug & kiss again.

Luscious- I love you so much. I’m gunna toss your salad every night, baby.

Tyreal- (shakes his head) Ya’ll need ta get the fuck on somewhere, wit that ol’ San Fran shit.

One of the inmates from the house crew walks up to Tyreal to say good-bye.

Baby Chat- Alright Cuzzo, see cool out there. And make sho’ you stay out there.

Tyreal- You know I will.

Baby Chat- Watch yo’ back. That ho ass nigga Emanuel back in seg woof’n about he’s gunna come see you. He’s mad cuz you put him out there.

Tyreal- Man, I don’t care if that nigga mad. He need to be mad at himself.

Baby Chat- What he mad fo’?

Tyreal- Cuz before I got locked up, I was work’n at a temp job downtown, & I saw his juvenile file. I saw it in black & white… back when he was 13, he used to stick his thumb in his little nephew’s asshole.

Baby Chat- Is you serious?

Tyreal- I swear ta God on my life. So fuck that nigga. He can run up if he want to. He’ll lose his whole spinal cord fuckin’ wit me.

C.O.- North, you wanna go home or not?!

Tyreal- What’chu mean go home or not? I’m expirate’n.

C.O.- So, that doesn’t mean anything.

Tyreal- Naw, it does mean somethin’. It means I’m goin’ home regardless. And it aint shit you funna do to stop me.

C.O.- State law says we can keep you here until midnight.

Tyreal- And state law also says I can tell you ta go eat a dick, you fagot ass bitch. Anyway the fuck it go, I’m gettin’ up outta here. And I’m ’bout ta go slay giants.

Tyreal is handcuffed & led into the back of a DOC prisoner transport van. The officer gets into the driver seat & waits for his partner to climb into the passenger seat. The driver turns on the radio, & Tyreal hears some white folks singing You Can Go Your Own Way. He can’t help but think about the irony of hearing this particular song at the exact time he’s being let out of prison. Even though it was a 2 hour drive from Rush City to Minneapolis, Tyreal hardly even noticed. He’s just focused on everything he has to do today, & everything he wants to do with his life in the next couple years. He knows what all he has to do, now he just needs to get out here & make it happen. He was able to get his hair cut at the prison barbershop inside the gym yesterday, so at least he looks halfway presentable. The prison transport drops him off downtown. Now he just needs to find out where the Greyhound station is. He knows it’s around here somewhere, so he stops somebody & gets directions. Tyreal had $84.81 on his books, so they gave it to him in cash. When he gets to the Greyhound station, he spends $84 to purchase a one-way ticket to Atlanta, GA, which is scheduled to depart in 3 weeks from today. So now he just needs to survive until then. But for right now, he just needs to get a ride, so he uses a woman’s cell phone to call his cousin Jerome. Twenty minutes later, Jerome pulls up in a Yukon Denali, listening to Look What I Got by Playaz Circle. Tyreal hops in the passenger seat, & sees Jerome is on the phone talking to his baby’s mom Kenya. Jerome still acknowledges Tyreal. He has the phone in his left hand, so he’s able to shake Tyreal’s hand with his right hand.

Jerome- What’s up my nig?

Tyreal- What up wit it, man. I’m ready ta go get it.

Jerome- (talking to Kenya) Naw, I’m talk’n to my cousin… Tyreal… Yeah, he’s out. He say he ready ta go get it, so we’ll see.

Jerome pulls back into traffic, headed for the North side.

Jerome- (talking to Kenya) I know all that, but why you keep write’n checks when you aint got enough in the bank to cover it? You know they gunna charge you every time one of your checks bounce… naw, I said I’m a give you some money after I dump this next ounce.

Tyreal- Damn ‘Rome, you real reckless wit the talk’n over the phone. You better be careful wit that shit.

Chapter 3

Back In The Hood

Jerome takes Tyreal back to his new house. He’s renting a 3 bedroom house in the Jordan neighborhood of North Minneapolis. Jerome just wants to grab some money out the stash before he takes Tyreal to see his dad.

Tyreal- Now I just gotta get a job. They put me out here with nothin’.

Jerome- Don’t even worry about it.

Tyreal- How I’m not gunna worry about it? I’m 27 years old, & I don’t have a dollar to my name.

Jerome- Cuz I got’chu cousin.

Tyreal- You got me how?

Jerome goes into his closet & pulls out the box for his Timberland boots. When he takes the lid off, Tyreal sees he has 18 ounces of crack cocaine in it.

Tyreal- Damn… you aint even been bullshittin’ out here.

Jerome- I told you.

Tyreal- Yeah, but you didn’t tell me you was doin’ it like I was doin’ it. What’s that, like a half chirp?

Jerome- Yup. And that’s not even include’n all the money I got put up. So what’s up, you need a starter kit?

Tyreal- I kinda do… I need one, but I can’t.

Jerome- Why not?

Tyreal- I’m so hot right now, I can’t even move like I wanna move. The State got me under a microscope. And I’m try’n to stay outta jail & do it right.

Jerome- What’chu gunna do then? Cuz you gotta do somethin’.

Tyreal- When I was in there, I wrote the 1st five seasons of my own sitcom. So I wanna do somethin’ wit that.

Jerome- That’s cool, but that’s more of a long-term goal. You gunna need somethin’ to put some money in your pocket now. You just said you 27, & you got how much money to your name?

Tyreal- (shakes his head) .81 cents.

Jerome- Right. But whatever you do, you gotta be careful out here. You remember how wild the North side was when you left. Now it’s even worse. Everything’s worse. Nigga’s is worse. These bitches is worse. The police is worse. And you got them hurricane Katrina victims cause’n problems. Doin’ dumb shit.

Tyreal- Still? I’m start’n to think it wasn’t even about the hurricane. Them nigga’s stay on bullshit, just cuz they like bein’ on bullshit.

Jerome- But it’s lame nigga’s like that everywhere. They don’t care about nobody else’s life, cuz they don’t care about they own life. They’ll kill you over a pack of squares.

Tyreal- (shakes his head) That’s the shit that almost got ’em wiped off the map in the 1st place. And they still don’t get the picture. I heard after Katrina, when they had people in the Superdome, nigga’s was in there rape’n women in the dark.

Jerome- Yeah.

Tyreal- I don’t even honor that fuck shit. These nigga’s need ta get real.

Jerome- It’s some of them N.O. nigga’s a few houses down. They just moved in about 2 weeks ago… But that’s alright. We ready for any of these nigga’s that think they wanna run up in here.

Jerome pulls out a AR-15 from under the bed, then he cocks it.

Jerome- Hold that fo’ me.

Tyreal- Aw naw, I’m good.

Jerome- Just for a second.

Tyreal- Naw, I’m good.

Jerome- Aw nigga… you done did you a lil’ 6 years, & now you afraid to touch a lil’ firepower?

Tyreal- Hell yeah.

Rome laughs & sets the A-R down on the bed.

Tyreal- I aint even gunna lie.

Jerome- That’s right, you aint gotta lie ta kick it.

Jerome picks up the two pistols on the dresser.

Tyreal- You damn right I don’t. The 1st time I put in work, you was still in 2nd grade.

Jerome- I know, I’m just say’n. Don’t get scared now. (Holding a pistol in each hand) These thangs right here might save yo’ life someday.

Tyreal- If it comes down to that, that’s somethin’ totally different. But until then, I’m a be doin’ everything I can to stay outta jail.

Jerome- I feel you. I aint try’n ta go to jail either. But I’ll get outta jail before I’ll get out the grave. The police just did a sweep, & got 98 guns off the street last month.

Tyreal- I don’t even do shit ta make people wanna kill me.

Jerome- You can get killed just cuz you wit the intended target. These young nigga’s a kill you just ta get a name off you.

Tyreal- That aint nothin’ new. What else is new?

Jerome- These people got this thing called Shot Spotter all over the hood.

Tyreal- What’s that?

Jerome- It’s called Shot Spotter technology. Any time there’s gunshots, this electronic system detects it, & alerts the police where the shots are come’n from. So the police can get there right away.

They hear the doorbell, so Jerome walks out into the living room. He looks thru the peephole in the door, & sees his cousin Mia. When he opens the door, he sees Mia has been crying, so he lets her in.

Jerome- What’s wrong?

Mia- I just got put out of my apartment.

Jerome- For what?

Mia- Because I lost my job, & I couldn’t afford to pay the rent. I got behind a couple months. I just came home, & all my stuff was out on the front lawn. They put an eviction notice on the door. Now I’m homeless. Me & Regina don’t have anywhere to live.

Jerome- Why can’t you stay wit your mom?

Mia- Because, she disowned me.

Jerome- Aunt Pam aint funna disown you.

Mia- Yes she did.

Jerome- Where’s Regina?

Mia- She’s in the car.

Jerome- You mean to tell me, outta all them friends you got, won’t none of ’em let’chu stay wit ’em?

Mia- I already asked everybody I’m comfortable bringing my daughter around.

Jerome- So where you gunna live?

Mia- Can I stay here? Just for awhile?

Jerome- Naw. (shaking his head) I don’t think that’s a good idea.

Mia- Why not?

Jerome- Mia, you know I love you, but that’s why I don’t want’chu to stay here wit Regina. You know about the illegal activity I’m into… & you still don’t even know the half of it.

Mia- I know, but I don’t have anywhere else I can go. I don’t have anybody else I can count on.

Jerome- (thinks about it) Alright… but’chu puttin’ me in a fucked up position. I don’t want’chu to stay here… but I can’t turn you away if you & Regina won’t have anywhere to sleep. I don’t even have enough beds for everybody.

Mia- Don’t you have 3 bedrooms?

Jerome- Yeah. But I only have one extra bed. I don’t be have’n a gang of people sleep’n over here. I just need one extra bed in case I have a guest come over.

Mia- Who else is living here?

Jerome- Tyreal just got out, & he’s gunna need the room wit the bed.

Mia- Tyreal’s out? Where’s he at?

Jerome- He’s in the bedroom. Tyreal!

Tyreal walks into the living room & sees Mia.

Tyreal- What’s up Mia?

Mia- (smiles) Hey ‘Real. (She walks up & hugs him) It’s good to see you again. I’m glad you’re back.

Tyreal- Me too.

Jerome- ‘Real, Mia doesn’t have anywhere to live, so her & Regina need to stay here for a little while. Is it okay if her & Regina get the room wit the bed?

Tyreal- I aint trippin’. I’ll sleep on the couch. I’m just happy to be out. I’d sleep on the floor if I had to. It’s just temporarily anyway.

Mia- (smiles) Thanks ‘Real. (she hugs Tyreal again)

Chapter 4

Property Damage

While Tyreal was incarcerated, his property was being stored in his mom’s basement, but when she moved to Atlanta, his dad came & moved everything into a storage locker. So now Tyreal needs to get his property back. Jerome gives him a ride to his dad’s house in Northeast Minneapolis, so he can get the key to the storage locker. Words can’t even describe how happy Tyroy North is to see his son again. And Tyreal is just as happy to see his dad. Before he went to prison, he used to come hang out with his dad every Sunday. While he was in prison, they talked on the phone every Sunday for the last 6 years. And all they talked about was how their week was, & how good it’s going to feel the first time they can talk face to face again.

Tyreal- So what’s goin’ on wit’chu Dad?

Tyroy- Nothin’ too major, just trying to enjoy my time off before I go back to work. I told you how the Ford plant has been talking about shutting down.

Tyreal- Yeah.

Tyroy- They just recently downsized. So they offered the employees a settlement package, or the opportunity to stay on with some stipulations.

Tyreal- What kinda stipulations?

Tyroy- Reduced hours… & a small salary reduction.

Tyreal- Which one are you gunna go wit?

Tyroy- I chose to stay on. Because at my age, there’s not really much more I can do to make that amount of money. But I’ll just have to adjust to them cutting back my hours, & my pay. I could work for a couple months straight, but then I could be off for 2 or 3 weeks. Without pay. Right now I’m off for 3 weeks.

Tyreal- Damn, why they doin’ that?

Tyroy- They say this truck we’re making, the Ford Ranger, they say it’s not selling like they want it too.

Tyreal- If it’s not doin’ the numbers they want, common sense should tell ’em to stop make’n ’em, & come with somethin’ better. They need to bring the Ford Bronco back. I don’t know why they stopped make’n them. I used to love them back in high school.

Tyroy- They know that, but they’re just trying to outsource & send the jobs overseas so they can make more money.

Tyreal- That doesn’t even make sense. I mean, it makes sense from a financial aspect, but how is they gunna take jobs from American’s, & then expect American’s to keep supporting their product?

Tyroy- I know, but it’s all about the bottom line for these people.

Tyreal- That’s why GM needed that federal bailout money, cuz people aren’t shoppin’ wit ’em like they used to. Cuz they greedy. Then they wonder why people not spend’n wit ’em no more.

Tyroy- I know, but what can you do, ya know? What’s up Rome? How have you been? I haven’t seen you in awhile.

Jerome- I’m good. I can’t even complain. I’m eat’n good.

Tyroy- How’s your mom been? Last I heard, she was still working at the hospital.

Jerome- Yeah, she’s still there. She’s talking about moving to Phoenix with Serena.

Tyroy- Oh yeah? Serena’s out?

Jerome- Yeah, she got out early. She was supposed to do 15 years, but Obama gave her a pardon, so she got out after 10.

Tyroy- That’s amazing. I never knew the true story behind her goin’ to prison, I just heard bits & pieces. Wasn’t it something about her & her boyfriend?

Jerome- Yeah, when she was 18, she was mess’n wit the son of this big time drug dealer. And when the son went down, the fed’s took her down with him. They said they had her on tape setting up drug deals for him. They offered to drop the charges if she agreed to testify on her guy, but she wouldn’t do it. So they gave her 15 years in the fed.

Tyroy- That’s rare to find a girl that would take a bullet like that. You just don’t see that kind of loyalty anymore. So what’s she up to now?

Jerome- She’s doin’ good. She’s in her 2nd year of law school down in Phoenix.

Tyroy- Is that right? My other son Tyrell is about to move to Phoenix next month. Him & his girlfriend are going down there to start a real estate company. I guess it’s a growing city, so it’s good for the real estate business right now.

Jerome- Yeah, Serena says she likes it out there. But it’s just so hot out there.

Tyroy- I could imagine. Tyreal, have you talked to ‘Rell lately?

Tyreal- It’s been some months.

Tyroy- You should get in touch with him. He said he might have some work for you. You could do some appraisal work or somethin’ for him down there.

Tyreal- Alright, I’m a see what’s up wit ‘im. Cuz I sho’ need some money. I was ravenous before, but I aint know shit about bein’ hungry, until I hit rock bottom. And the longer I had to stay there, the hungrier I became. I’m so hungry for this shit now, I’ll step on my own mom just to get my own sitcom. Which reminds me, I need those notebooks I was send’n you. I need to type ’em up & get ’em copyrighted.

Tyroy- Okay. I still got everything you sent me. It’s downstairs.

Tyreal- I need to get the key to the storage, so I can get all my shit too. I’m so tired of wear’n these prison clothes, & these ol’ janky ass shoes. I can’t wait to put on my gear. So I can get back out here stunt’n.

When they get to the Public Storage, Tyreal opens up the storage locker, & it’s virtually empty. Someone stole everything but his oldest pair of tennis shoes & his Nike Sharks football cleats.

Tyreal- Man, what the fuck?! Where the fuck all my shit at?!

They walk inside & Jerome picks up the shoes with his left hand, & then he picks up the football cleats with his right hand so he can examine them.

Jerome- At least they didn’t just leave you wit the football cleats. Tyreal- ‘Rome, man this aint the time. I aint try’n to hear nuttin’ about no jokes right now.

Tyreal & Jerome are in the Public Storage office, talking to the manager.

Tyreal- Ya’ll better find out who stole my shit! I want everything back, or I’m sue’n the shit out ya’ll!

Storage Manager- Do you have any way to prove what all is missing?

Tyreal- Yeah, my Dad put all of my property in here last year.

Storage Manager- Do you have any receipts?

Tyreal- No, I aint got no receipts for that shit. It’s been so long since I bought that. I been in prison 6 years, I don’t know where no receipts is at, man!

Storage Manager- (laughs) Well then we’re not worried about you suing us. You have no proof. The locker wasn’t broken into, & the lock wasn’t tampered with. For all we know, one of your family members came in & removed your stuff. You need to go talk to whoever had the key.

Tyreal- I aint goin’ for that. My family know better than ta steal from me.

Chapter 5

The Mall Of America

Tyreal needs to buy some new clothes & shoes, so Jerome is on his way to the Mall of America in Bloomington, MN. While doing 80 mph on 35W South, Jerome is smoking a blunt. He can see that Tyreal is still seething over losing his property, so he offers the blunt to Tyreal, but Tyreal passes on it.

Jerome- Here man, you need to hit this weed. This will help you calm down.

Tyreal- I don’t need to calm down. I need to be sharp right now. I gotta find out who took my shit.

Jerome- Unless your dad took it, we’ll probably never find out who took it.

Tyreal- I know my dad aint take it.

Jerome- Alright, well then that shit’s just gone. You gunna have to charge that shit to the game, & start over. You start’n your life over, so I guess you gotta start your property over from scratch too. But it’s just material shit. All that stuff can be replaced. Now you’ll just end up gettin’ better shit than you had before.

Tyreal- What’chu was say’n about a starter kit?

Jerome- What’chu need?

Tyreal- I just need a couple yams, & a couple custo’s.

Jerome- Alright. I got that for you. I’ll front’chu a ounce, & I’ll throw you another ounce, just on the strength. And you can get my cell phone. Cuz I was funna get me a new one anyway.

Tyreal- I appreciate it. That’s all I need. I gotta hustle back. Just until I get back what I lost.

Jerome- Just be careful out here. You already said the State is watch’n you. And you already know the street is watch’n you.

Tyreal- I know what I’m doin’ lil’ cousin.

Jerome- Alright. You just got out. I don’t want’chu goin’ right back.

Tyreal- I aint funna go through that shit no more.

Jerome- Weren’t you supposed to go to boot camp? What happened to that?

Tyreal- I did go to boot camp.

Jerome- What happened?

Tyreal- I got kicked out. Them people had me fucked up. I aint funna let nobody talk to me like that. Especially not no cracker.

Jerome- How long did you make it?

Tyreal- About… 8 hours.

Jerome- You got kicked out the 1st day?

Tyreal- They kicked me out the 1st day. I woulda been out a year & a half ago if I woulda finished it. But I said fuck that. Send me back to population. I’d rather do my time.

Jerome- I don’t blame you. I don’t like people talk’n crazy to me either. You already pissed off cuz you locked up. The last thing you need is somebody try’n to kick you when you’re down… So what’chu need out here?

Tyreal- I need clothes. And some kicks.

Jerome- How much you think you’ll need?

Tyreal- Shit, just let me hold like, $350. That should be good for now. When I start gettin’ some money, I’m a come back & burn this bitch down. But for right now, I just need a couple ‘fits. And some shoes. I feel ridiculous come’n up in here wit these state issues on. I’m goin’ straight to Foot Locker.

Inside the Foot Locker at Mall of America, Tyreal finds a pair of blue & silver AirMax ‘95’s he likes. Jerome pulls out $2,135 from his pocket. He counts out $350 & hands it to Tyreal.

Tyreal- Alright, good look’n out.

As soon as Tyreal pays for the shoes, he immediately puts them on & throws the state issue prison shoes into the trash can. As they are walking out the shoe store, a white guy & his girlfriend are walking past. The young girl is staring at Tyreal as the couple walks by. Tyreal feels a little boost of swag now that he has some nice shoes on for the 1st time in years. Even though he still has on a blue button up prison shirt & blue jeans, he’s ready to start hollering at girls. They’re walking down a 1st floor hallway, when they see a cute hostess at the entrance to an Italian restaurant. So Tyreal decides to try his luck, knowing full well he has nothing to lose.

Tyreal- What’s up, how you doin’?

Laura- I’m fine. (smiles)

Tyreal- Good. I’m glad to hear that.

Laura- Do you guys need a table?

Tyreal- Naw, we funna eat somewhere else. But I just thought you looked nice so… I was not funna go the rest of the day without let’n you know that.

Laura- (smiles) Thank you. But you guys should eat here. They have really good food.

Tyreal- Alright, I’m a make a deal wit’chu. We’ll eat here, if you take a break & come join us.

Laura- (smiles) I can’t. That’s not what they pay me for.

Tyreal- Alright, well how about… you give me your number, & we can come have dinner here one day when you don’t have to work?

Laura- I have a boyfriend.

Tyreal- So. He can come too. I want him to know exactly what he has to look forward to if he ever takes you for granted.

Laura- I don’t think he would like that.

The manager walks up to be nosey.

Manager- Do you gentleman need a table?

Tyreal- Naw, we don’t need no table. We was just pass’n by, & we stopped to compliment Laura on her customer service skills. Ya’ll need to give her a raise. Or make her employee of the month or somethin’.

Manager- If you’re not eating here, then you need to let Laura get back to work. We don’t need you here scaring off our customers.

Tyreal- Whatever dude. Alright Laura, I’m a holler at’chu. Make sure you have a good day for me.

Laura- Okay.

Tyreal & Jerome continue walking down the hallway.

Jerome- Old dude was on some hater shit.

Tyreal- I know, but I aint even trippin’. I’m a be back to see what’s up wit ‘er. I’m lumberjackin’ every time I see her.

Jerome- I don’t even know why they put her up front if they don’t want nobody talk’n to her.

Tyreal sees a cute brown skin girl walking in front of them, so he approaches her from behind, & walks up so he’s right next to her.

Tyreal- Ay, what’s up, can I talk to you real quick?

Tyreal must have scared the girl, because she jumps like he pulled out a gun on her.

Tyreal- Damn, what’chu gettin’ scared for? (laughs) You act’n like I pulled out a banger on you.

Macy- Because, you just came out of nowhere on me.

Tyreal- (laughs) My bad. I didn’t mean to startle you. Next time I’ll try to come out of somewhere or… somethin’. I don’t know… but I just wanted to see if I could get’cher number, so I can call you sometime.

Macy- I don’t have a phone.

Tyreal- Aw… Okay, well I’ll give you my number, so when you get a phone, you can hit me up. Alright?

Macy- Okay.

Tyreal reaches inside his Foot Locker bag & gets the receipt so he can write his number on it for her. They walk over to a kiosk, so he can borrow a pen. While he’s writing his number down for Macy, they hear the ring tone from a cell phone. Tyreal doesn’t know if it’s his cell phone, because he just got it from Jerome, & he’s not sure if it’s one of Jerome’s ring tones. When he checks his phone, he sees that no one is calling him, but he can still hear the ring tone. Then he realizes it’s coming from Macy’s purse.

Tyreal- So you aint got a phone, huh?

Tyreal & Jerome start to walk away.

Tyreal- If you aint wanna gimmie your number, that’s all you had ta say. I woulda respected it more if you woulda just kept it real.

Jerome- You’re gunna have to get used to that type shit. These girls aint funna keep it real wit nobody. I got 7 girls I’m fuck’n wit, & can’t none of ’em keep it real two days in a row. That’s why I only fuck wit ’em 1 day out the week.

Tyreal laughs. Then he sees a cute caramel complexion girl, so he walks up to her & taps her on her shoulder. But before he can say hi, she freaks out & sprays him with mace. Luckily, his reflexes allowed him to move his face out the way in time.

Tyreal- Man, what the fuck is wrong wit’chu?! If you that paranoid, you need to keep yo’ scared ass in the house!

After that incident, Tyreal is ready to go home. But he still needs to go get a couple outfits, so they go to Marshalls so he can buy some Polo shirts, white t’s, blue jeans, & some navy blue Dickies pants. After that, they’re on they’re way back to Nordstroms so they can get to the parking lot. When they’re approaching Nordstroms, they hear somebody shouting nearby. It’s Emmanuel Ruliford.

Emmanuel- Tyreal!

Tyreal looks around & sees Emmanuel about 50 feet away, standing with his girlfriend.

Tyreal- Look at this bitch nigga.

Tyreal & Jerome wait for Emmanuel & his girlfriend to walk up to them. Emmanuel sounded like he had some hostility in his voice, so they want to see what he wants.

Emmanuel- We need to talk. (upset)

Tyreal- Naw, you need ta keep your thumb outta little boys’ booty holes.

Emmanuel- What?

Tamara- What?

Tyreal- Just what I said, homegirl. You better watch who you deal’n wit out here. You out here think’n you look’n cute & shit, walk’n around the mall wit a mutha fuck’n child molester.

Emmanuel- You got me fucked up. (angry)

Jerome- Hold on nigga. You better fall back, before you fall down.

Tyreal- Fa real. I got’chu just right. You better calm that shit down. You can tell that ho whatever, but I know what’s up.

Tamara gets upset & walks off.

Emmanuel- Where you goin’?!

Tamara doesn’t even respond or look back, she just keeps walking away.

Emmanuel- Alright Tyreal, I bet I’m come’n to see you. (walks off after Tamara)

Tyreal- Yeah alright… Chester. I’m on Vincent Block. (Throws up the hand sign for Vincent Block) I aint goin’ nowhere.

As soon as Tyreal & Jerome try to walk into Nordstroms, 4 Bloomington police officers surround them.

Mall Officer- Where are you guys headed?

Jerome- Why is you worried about where we goin’?

Mall Officer- Don’t get smart. This is serious. I asked you where you’re going.

Jerome- We funna go holler at’cher daughter. Me & my cousin funna run one.

Mall Officer- No, I don’t think so. You’re about to leave.

Tyreal- What’chu mean we about to leave?

Mall Officer- One of the store managers called us & told us you guys were bothering one of his employees.

Tyreal- What is you talk’n about? We aint bother’n nobody.

Mall Officer- Well, he said you guys are stalking one of his female employees. So we’re here to escort you out of the mall.

Tyreal- 1st of all, we was on our way out anyway, so don’t think you kick’n us out. And 2nd of all, aint nobody stalk’n that girl. She was the hostess at the front of the restaurant. She was damn near out in the hallway. We didn’t even have to go in the restaurant. I just talked to her for 60 seconds, & old dude came out hate’n on me. Then we left.

Mall Officer- He said you were harassing her, & you’re not allowed to come back. If you go back there to talk to her, we’re going to arrest you for trespassing.

Tyreal- (makes a confused face) Trespassing? Man, whatever. You aint even gotta worry about all that. That girl is not that hot. It aint even that serious.

Chapter 6

Speed Dating

Jerome & Tyreal are driving back to North Minneapolis. The music is so loud, they can’t hear Tyreal’s new cell phone ringing. Tyreal notices someone is calling him because the phone is illuminating from the cup holder. He sees someone named Natalie is calling, so he tells Jerome, & Jerome picks up the phone & answers it.

Jerome- What up? (turns the music down)

Natalie- Hey ‘Rome, how would you like to do me a favor.

Jerome- What’chu need?

Natalie- I’ve been organizing this speed dating event downtown at the Marriot, & we had some people that couldn’t make it. Now we have a disparity issue.

Jerome- What’chu mean?

Natalie- There’s a lot of women, but not enough men. So we’re trying to bring in about 9 or 10 more guys to even out the gender ratio.

Jerome- What’chu need me to do?

Natalie- I just need you to come by & meet some women. It’ll only take about 2 hours. Are you available tonight?

Jerome- Yeah, if it’s only for a couple hours. Can my cousin come?

Natalie- If it’s a guy.

Jerome- Yeah, it’s my cousin Tyreal.

Natalie- Sure. The more the merrier.

Jerome- When does it start?

Natalie- In about a hour.

Jerome- Alright, I’ll be