Lessons from My Father: 77 Mini Life Lessons from Dear Old Dad and Historical Fathers

By Allan G. Hedberg Ph.D.

Life isnt easy, and dealing with its challenges, setbacks, and pitfalls can drain us of energy. Even so, finding hope in the midst of it all is not only possible, but necessary.

Youll find short messages of encouragement and inspiration in Lessons from My Father, a compilation of seventy-seven, faith-based life lessons from clinical psychologist Dr. Allan G. Hedberg. Combining his more than forty years experience in helping people with their needs, Hedberg helps you face your problems and guides you in your personal enrichment.

Through the eyes of famous and everyday fathers, as well as our Heavenly Father, each thought-provoking meditation provides areas for growing and maturing as a believer in Christ. Hedberg teaches the value of self-acceptance, the importance of encouragement, the intimacy of relationships, the process of caring, and the unfolding of an active and vital faith. His vital life lessons include building self-esteem, learning self-control, developing social skills, improving interpersonal relationships, and many more.

Spend a few minutes each day with Lessons from My Father for messages of hope and inspiration.

• Language: English
• Publisher: WestBow Press
• Release date: Dec 15, 2015
• ISBN: 9781490898186

Allan G. Hedberg Ph.D.

Dr. Allan G. Hedberg is a clinical psychologist and maintains a private practice in Fresno, California. He received his doctorate in 1969 from Queen’s University, Kingston, Ontario. Hedberg is the founding principal of Avante Health, a managed care health insurance company. He and his wife, Bernice, live in Fresno and have three children.

Book preview

Lessons from My

Father

77 Mini Life Lessons from Dear Old Dad and Historical Fathers

ALLAN G. HEDBERG, PH.D.

44085.png

Copyright © 2015 Allan G. Hedberg, Ph.D.

Compiled and edited by Allan G. Hedberg

Cover design: Janet S. Rutherford

Inside Design: Rob Carey

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

Scripture quotations have been taken from the New International Version® unless otherwise indicated.

Scripture quotations are from The King James Version of the Bible also known as the Authorized Version.

Scripture taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®. Copyright© 1973, 1978, 1984 Biblica. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation®, copyright© 1996, 2004. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations are taken from the Good News Translation® in Today’s English Version – Second Edition Copyright© 1992 by American Bible Society. Used by permission.

Scripture quotations are taken from the Holman Christian Standard Bible® copyright 1999, 2000, 2002, 2003 by Holman Bible Publishers. Used by permission. Holman Christian Standard Bible®, Holman CSB® is federally registered trademarks of Holman Bible Publishers.

WestBow Press

A Division of Thomas Nelson & Zondervan

1663 Liberty Drive

Bloomington, IN 47403

www.westbowpress.com

1 [phone]

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

ISBN: 978-1-4908-9817-9 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4908-9819-3 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-4908-9818-6 (e)

WestBow Press rev. date: 12/09/2015

CONTENTS

DEDICATION

PREFACE

CHAPTER 1: LESSONS ON BUILDING SELF-ESTEEM

1. You Can Succeed And Don’t Let Anyone Say You Can’t

2. Always Remember Who You Are, Where You Are And What You Represent

3. Every Man Puts On His Trousers The Same Way, One Leg At A Time

4. Don’t Let Anyone Tear You Down

5. You Weigh Just As Many Ounces To The Pound As She Does

6. Don’t Get Too Deep In The Hole

7. Who I Am Is What You Get

8. You’re The Man

9. Semper Fidelis

10. Stupid Is As Stupid Does

11. A Day’s Pay For A Day’s Work

12. Thumbs Up

13. Go Out And Do Your Chores; You Will Feel Better.

CHAPTER 2: LESSONS ON IMPROVING INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS

1. Don’t Let Anyone Take Your Peace Away

2. Misery Loves Company

3. What You Create With Your Hands You Erase With Your Feet

4. Good Kids Become Good Friends And Have Good Friends

5. You Cannot Reason With Somebody Who Is Unreasonable

6. Don’t Be Tafatt

7. You Don’t Get Harpooned Unless You Are Spouting

8. You Catch More Bees With Honey Than With Vinegar

9. Give And Live

10. Excuses Are Like Armpits, Everybody Has Two And They Always Stink

11. You Knew The Baby Needed A Diaper Change Before You Sat Down

12. Two Wrongs Don’t Make A Right

13. Don’t Run Up The Stairs And Don’t Run Down People

14. There Is No Such Thing As Bad Weather, Just Inappropriate Clothing

15. You Can Lead A Horse To Water, But You Can’t Make Him Drink

16. If They Are Going To Lie, Let Them Lie

17. If You Lie, You Are A Thief, If You Are A Thief, You Are A Liar

18. If They Hit You First, Hit Them Back

19. If They Jump Off The Bridge, Don’t You Jump Too

20. It Is Not What You Said, But How You Said It

CHAPTER 3: LESSONS ON LIVING WISELY AND WELL

1. Keep Your Ax Sharpened

2. Nothing Good Happens After Midnight

3. Taking Out The Trash Brings In The Respect

4. Curiosity Killed The Cat

5. Personal Growth Comes From Getting Up One More Time Than You Fall Down

6. Don’t Make Any Decisions At Night When You Are Tired; It Is Easier In The Morning When Your Mind Is Fresh

7. If You Can’t Work And Talk At The Same Time, Stop Talking

8. Poor People Have Money; Rich People Have Money And Problems.

9. There Is Nothing Worse Than A Lazy Man

10. No Home Should Be Run By A Two Year Old

11. Do What Your Mama Says

12. Thoroughness

13. Let’s Roll

14. You Will Never Know Until You Try

15. Give Me Something Of Thee And Something For Me

16. Keep Your Nose Clean

17. Money Is The Root Of All Evil

CHAPTER 4: LESSONS ON SEEING THE FUTURE IN PERSPECTIVE

1. When The Storms Of Life Come, It Is Too Late To Learn How To Swim

2. Rain Will Happen, But The Sun Will Always Shine Again

3. The Walk Of A Mile Starts With The First Step

4. Embrace The Journey

5. Truth Is An Absolute, The Rest Of Life Will Fall Together

6. Embrace The Unknown Future

7. What If…?

8. This Too Shall Pass

9. Childhood Is Preparation For Old Age

10. We Win Or Lose By The Way We Choose

11. Follow God…God Leads And We Follow

CHAPTER 5: LESSONS IN LIFE FROM OUR FOREFATHERS AND WORLD LEADERS

1. You Can Either Make A Mark With Your Life… Or You Can Make A Blur

2. You Never Know What Tomorrow Will Bring; The Trick Is To Be Ready When It Comes

3. Don’t Be Interesting, Be Interested

4. What Lies Behind You And What Lies Before You Pale In Significance When Compared To What Lies Within You

5. When The Wheat Is High Enough, Nobody Sees The Fences

6. England Expects That Every Man Will Do His Duty

7. Believe In Something Bigger Than Yourself

8. Miracles Don’t Happen Overnight, Sometimes They Take An Entire Weekend

9. A Little Science Estranges A Man From God; A Lot Of Science Brings Him Back

10. Determine Never To Stop Until You Have Come To The End And Achieved Your Purpose

11. Keep On Swinging

12. Do Not Forget The Customer Because Nothing Else Matters

13. He Who Says It, Does It

14. Unless You Love Your Work, You Won’t Find Balance

15. We Are All Servants In The Best Sense Of The Word

16. Go Forth And Preach The Gospel, And If Necessary Use Words

POSTSCRIPT

HOW BEST TO USE THIS BOOK

DEDICATION

Dedicated to all my patients in therapy for their ongoing personal growth and improvement.

A special thanks goes to all the patients who willingly shared with me their father’s mottos and their personal story. All names and a few of the details have been changed to protect their identity.

Kudos also goes to my office staff, Bernice, Gina and Kathy, who gave an extra effort to bring this devotional book to market.

Special recognition go to George Bragg, PhD, who invited me to write devotions for his weekly devotional blog with an online reading of approximately 2,000 people. His website is known as Journey Christian Fellowship, www.journeychristianfellowship.

TOUCHPOINT

Your statutes are my delight; they are my counselors.

(Psalm 119:24)

PREFACE

Devotional and instructional reading brings growth in one’s Christian faith and lifestyle. Devotional reading is one of the disciplines for those believers that desire to mature in their Christian faith and walk. Through devotional reading we have fellowship with the Lord himself and learn to live and walk the Christian life more fully.

Devotional reading is more than casual reading or enjoyment; it is part of the process of learning to personally experience who God is, who my neighbor is, and how I impact others by my daily walk.

Devotional reading is a good way to learn to live the Christian life before others and personally gain from the experiences of others……from our fathers, to be sure. From a systematic reading of Lessons from my Father, we learn the value of self acceptance, the importance of encouragement, the intimacy of relationships, the process of caring, and the unfolding of an active and vital faith.

Devotional reading is a daily experience for the growing and maturing Believer. Lessons from my Father was written to assist you in your personal growth experience and walk with the Lord. Your family, friends, neighbors, colleagues, vendors, competitors, customers, clients, pew sitters, teachers, employers and business associates, to name a few, will all benefit from the impact these devotional readings will have on you. I pray that this devotional, Lessons from my Father, will help you have a worldwide impact on others for the cause of Christ

In summary, devotional reading is to be inspirational, motivational, informational, and impactful. An old proverb put it this way, Write down the advice of him who loves you, though you like it not at the present. May you find such an experience as you read Lessons from my Fathers as a personal resource and spiritual guide book.

Allan G. Hedberg, Ph.D.

Clinical Psychologist

Fresno, California

CHAPTER 1

"…you shall teach them…talk of them…

when you walk by the way…"

Deuteronomy 6:7(KJV)

LESSONS ON BUILDING SELF-ESTEEM

Lessons in self-esteem are important to read and meditate upon, especially at times of discouragement and self-depreciation. As you read devotionals from this section, let God use the underlying message of the various devotionals to give you behavior-changing thoughts to mediate upon throughout the day. Read with a hope and purpose so you will gain confidence and achieve clear thinking. Learn how to take action steps to focus on the real value of God, faith, yourself, and those important to you. Make today’s devotional reading a confidence-building moment. Do whatever you can to share the message with others so they will have a life-changing experience likewise.

YOU CAN SUCCEED AND DON’T LET ANYONE

SAY YOU CAN’T

In everything he (David) did he had great success,

because the Lord was with him.

I Samuel 18:14

Jessica’s parents were both full time working parents. Her father was an executive with a major insurance company. While he was very active in his business and worked long hours, he also maintained an active involvement in her life, for which she has been very thankful. As Jessica and I talked during her therapy sessions, she recalled many occasions playing dolls and games with her father on the floor. He often took her along with him on some of his business calls. She valued these times with him. They helped her develop a special relationship with him even into her adult years. It was these special occasions together with him that left her with a fond and warm memory of her father after his untimely death, just one year earlier to our conversation.

In therapy, as we were processing her grief over the loss of her father, I asked her to reflect on the influence of her father on her life. She readily recalled the phrase that he frequently repeated, You can succeed and don’t let anyone say you can’t. He stated it so many times that it became her own motto for her life.

While she never forgot the motto, unfortunately she did neglect to recall it at very important times in her life when she was undergoing a high degree of stress; most recently in her employment situation with her supervisor. She stated how her supervisor was a very demanding, demeaning and belittling person. She stated that she began to doubt herself when she was around him. Self doubt became a chronic battle for her.

As her therapy continued, I encouraged her to reclaim the motto of her father and apply it to the work situation in which she found herself. We practiced using it and applying it to various stressful situations in the workplace. Over the course of her therapy, the motto was frequently recalled. It served her well as a basis for her emotional recovery. She soon felt increased confidence, strength, determination and independence.

As she based her reliance on God’s presence in her life she ultimately grew in wisdom and maturity. She became a leader in her office just as David experienced in his encounters with Saul (I Samuel 18:14). Indeed, the Lord was with David, and he soon became a servant leader of a thousand men. Even Saul took close notice of David’s exemplary living and leadership style thereafter.

EXPERIENCING GOD

Lord, there are times when I get discouraged and doubt myself. There are times when the comments of other people lead me astray and create within me a sense of inadequacy and personal weakness. Today, I seek your help by asking for your presence in my