Dark Valleys and Sunlit Mountains

By A.J Lennox

Dark Valleys and Sunlit Mountains chronicles one couple's journey through numerous and diverse medical challenges encountered during the latter portion of a 31-year marriage. They took great pleasure in each other's company, extended families, friends; off-shore and domestic travel, summer cabin and boating. The marriage was good for both.

Significant changes to her husband's diet following their 1982 marriage, improved his overall health status considerably. His decades-long history of petit mal seizures was well monitored and treated with prescription drugs, adjusted appropriately by board certified neurologists.

Neither anticipated the events beginning with a seizure incident in May 2007, continuing into 2013. Life became one supreme medical challenge after another, each different; each with its own specific dark valley. Periods with minimal hope, no diagnosis, medical miracles or answers found. He recuperated from each (until 2013), slowly regaining strength, mobility and well-being. Each sunlit mountain recovery experience was savored. Plans commenced for more travel.

A 2009 successful lliostomy procedure mitigated Gl bleeds, but left Ted unwilling to live, despite medical assurances. No carcinoma was present, but refusing to eat, he came home to die; the darkest valley of all. With no medical training, she became the sole 24(1 critical patient caregiver. Pray without ceasing, with thanksgiving, became the watchword.

These trials served to greatly strengthen the wife's life-long trust and faith in God's promises. She discovered a depth of faith heretofore unknown, experienced or even thought possible; learning to trust on an entirely new plane, finding God's comforting peace amidst the depths of human despair. Promises of God's unfailing presence in our lives, never to leave or forsake us; to provide our every need sustained her.

In late April 2010 Ted quietly declared for the first time, "It just came to me, looking out the window. I do believe in God."

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: May 1, 2014
• ISBN: 9781496906403

A.J Lennox

A J. Lennox was divorced, a paralegal, struggling to support herself and young son when she met Ted; they wed in 1982. Marriage two for her; and fifth for Ted, widowed two years prior by cancer. She had escaped a first marriage after twenty years of virtually unending blame; mental and emotional abuse and repeated threats of institutionalization or death. Poverty and a new name were chosen over sticking it out, despite deeply-held religious restraints. Ted provided not only a safe and secure home environment for herself and son but introduced her to an entirely new aspect life. With him she found love on a totally new plane: acceptance as a worthwhile and intelligent person, communication and sharing, mutual respect, support and encouragement of her many artistic endeavors and accomplishments, personal and financial security. Life was to be enjoyed, not merely survived. This was a totally new element in her life, and for the first time in her life she truly felt valued as a person. Ted shared his underlying medical issue of petit-mal seizure activity prior to their marriage, and had experienced some in the months prior. His were quite mild, commonly referred to as absence seizures, with unidentified causation, and appropriate medication. He worked in the finance industry, they had a summer cabin with boating; a normal life. Seizure incidents were incidental minor hick­ ups. Ted was the person on whom A J. could rely and lean on for emotional strength and stability. He was her rock. His medical condition shifted in May 2007 with a seizure-caused vehicle wreck. Congestive heart failure, by-pass procedure, gastro-intestinal bleeding, and numerous surgical procedures ensued. Gradually roles shifted from her relying on him, to his relying on her. Their journey and the role shifting is the topic of her book.

Book preview

26029.png

AuthorHouse™ LLC

1663 Liberty Drive

Bloomington, IN 47403

www.authorhouse.com

Phone: [phone]

© 2014 A. J. Lennox. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

Published by AuthorHouse 04/30/2014

ISBN: 978-1-4969-0641-0 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4969-0640-3 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2014907528

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Scripture quotations marked KJV are from the Holy Bible,

King James Version (Authorized Version). First published in 1611.

Quoted from the KJV Classic Reference Bible,

Copyright © 1983 by The Zondervan Corporation.

CONTENTS

In Appreciation:

Preface

2007 through 2013

2007 Wreck Beginning of Ted’s Medical Adventures

2008 By-pass Surgery/Arrest/Recovery/Rehab

2009 Iliostomy Procedure and…

Later and 2011 plus

A Darker Valley 2012 and 2013

Endnotes

IN APPRECIATION:

T o all those who encouraged the considerable effort involved in the process of actually putting Ted’s experiences of 2007, 2008 and 2009, along with his chronic medical conditions into written form. Reducing years of medical challenges to actual words, sentences and paragraphs proved an arduous task; re-living the events in detail frequently overwhelmed. From that struggle and pain however, came tremendous calm and peace.

A very special thanks to the men and women congregants at a 2010 Union Gospel Mission Christmas service. I was there to provide (only) piano accompaniment for group carol singing. The scheduled speaker failed to appear, and I was asked to fill in with ‘just a little talk’. What to say? Not a clue. A brief prayer for guidance and that God supply the right words for this setting was answered in a most unexpected way. The theme I was given was Ted, still recuperating. So clearly given I virtually heard the words. A short synopsis of Ted’s numerous medical problems and crises resulted; that clearly none of us is exempt from life’s difficulties. Our past or present station in life does not matter. God truly loves us and is with us, regardless of our circumstances. This quite brief recap of God’s promises, faithfulness, guidance, physical and spiritual healing that had resulted in Ted’s acknowledgment of God and coming to faith was organized and placed in my thoughts. God put appropriate words in my mind to proclaim His love and care for all regardless of whom or where we are and the circumstances we encounter. The warm and gracious response was utterly overwhelming. The countless hugs and words of thanks received helped me more than I could possibly have helped them.

Gratitude to friends and family members who maintained communication, relayed medical and health updates, and stood by with sincere offers and willingness to interrupt their lives on numerous occasions to assist in person. I only hope each can accept that those offers did so much to sustain during bleakest of times, just knowing I could call on them. Their telephone calls and mostly their prayers are so appreciated.

To our terrific neighbors who fed cats, watered and mowed the yard, turned on lights, took in papers, mail and kept watch on the house—the myriad of ‘little things’ that make such a huge difference when we lack sufficient time and energy. I can never thank them enough.

PREFACE

T his account of one man’s medical, emotional and spiritual journey begins in May 2007 and concludes in May of 2013. Presentation by spouse/caregiver is intentionally somewhat straightforward and pragmatic. Timeline of events is accurate and reflects very little input from the individual who underwent and endured the many quite traumatic experiences. He did not verbalize his personal thoughts, concerns, fears or emotions experienced during or after any major medical crises or during numerous recuperative periods. Only verbal outbursts before and following some surgical procedures, while still severely influenced by pain, anesthetics and various prescription drugs provided any evidence of his personal internal struggles.

We cannot control many events in our lives, but we do each have control as to our responses and the manner in which we cope with uncertainties, crises and frequently terrifying experiences.

At no time during each of our earthly lives are we provided any guarantee of an easy beautifully blissful and trouble-free journey.

No belief system, faith, creed, cult, religion, ritual, dogma, tenet or canon exists that insulates us from the human earthly experience. Each life—journey is unique. Each has its own trials, troubles and tribulations along with joys, successes and blessings.

Whatever comes our way, God has given us His promise to love us, guide and comfort us, and never abandon us to travel alone in darkness or in light.

He has said, Be still, and know that I am God; Lo, I am with you, always; Be not afraid. I have come that you may have abundant life and that your joy may be full.

Our part is to remember those promises, live by them and trust Him; a vital element in each earthly journey, regardless of our roles at a given time.

This man’s acknowledgment and acceptance of his personal faith in God’s promises was evidenced by a simple statement made in April of 2010, at which time he was becoming quite ambulatory. He slowly walked down a hall in his home, stood in the doorway, and said very quietly, It just came to me, looking out the window, I do believe in God.

Following is Ted’s Story

2007 THROUGH 2013

A ll incidents described in the following text are true and occurred as set forth. Names of individuals, entities and locations have been altered to protect the privacy of those still living, residing, engaged in businesses and/or professional activities in the actual geographic area.

2007

WRECK

BEGINNING OF TED’S MEDICAL ADVENTURES

O nly a single voice mail message was blinking… push the play message button and… "This is Deputy Michaels. Message is for A. J. Lennox. Mr. McPherson has been involved in a single-vehicle incident and is being transported to Mercy General Hospital Emergency for treatment. He is conscious, communicating and responding appropriately. Initial on-site evaluation does not indicate serious or life-threatening injury. Please contact me at (cell number) for additional details. Thank you . "

The shoe had dropped. Teddy had seized while driving. During the nearly 25 years of our relationship, despite regular monitoring by neurologists, appropriate medications, and careful vigilance relative to diet, rest patterns and stress mitigation, he had seized while driving. The single-vehicle reference was a plus. He had injured only himself, no one else.

May 22nd of 2007 was an absolutely splendid day. Snow, ice and chilling winds were long since gone; with warm sunshine and spring rains bringing flowers into bloom. I had reluctantly climbed to the 5th floor and back to work following lunch with daughter Joanna and Ross. So tempting was a walk along the river path and share pithy observations with an emerging marmot as to possible impact on his rocky den from rising waters. But, no—back to desk and documents.

That Ted was reported to be conscious, responsive and transported to ER was alarming. However he could clearly be heard over the deputy, loudly and colorfully protesting transport of any sort to any hospital, for any reason at any time.

No, I don’t need any hospital—no doctors. I’m standing up and not bleeding. Call my wife—she’ll pick me up. I just need to get home and call the insurance company. No, I don’t have a #@%*@%# cell phone.

Actually that was reassuring. Anyone extracted from a crashed vehicle and able to verbally protest at that volume in such colorful vocabulary was not critically injured. He was hurt, certainly, but quite conscious and fully able to communicate. His demands were firmly over-ruled by the EMTs and deputy.

Ted’s history of seizure episodes had spanned some four decades, monitored and treated by certified neurologists; no cause had been identified, as is quite to be expected. Causation remains a medical mystery. Retirement from more than 35 years in finance company management had lowered perceived stress levels. He enjoyed a part-time Special Assets Officer position with a long-established firm, setting his own hours. This also enabled him to keep tabs on and feed several cats populating an alley near the office. They maintained the entire area mouse free. No rodent was ever seen in that office building despite at-desk lunches and crumbs.

His current neurologist had treated Ted for nearly 20 years, adjusting prescriptions and dosages as appropriate; he also had neurological history from two other (also Board Certified) professionals at his disposal. None of the professionals treating him over the years deemed it necessary or appropriate to totally eliminate his driving. Consistent advice was for faithful adherence to medication dosages, regular monitoring, diet and rest patterns and of course, to notify immediately of any incident(s) experienced. At no time was any restriction placed on vehicle operation. Ted drove on less traveled streets, stayed off the Interstate and avoided heavy traffic periods. In addition, he just did not like to drive (whereas I do) and he generally was the passenger. That had worked.

So much for all the precautions. This incident had occurred mid-day. He had eaten a well-balanced breakfast and taken morning medications. No known stress factor was evident, he was adhering to his normal schedule of activity, and a mere 3 miles from home.

Back in my office that May 22nd afternoon, computer was shut down, phone back on v-mail, corporate client contract files shoved into somewhat appropriate storage, and note left—will call ASAP. Off to Mercy General at a dead run, heart pounding. A disjointed, hasty and theologically inapt prayer for Ted’s health and safety, wisdom of ER personnel, serenity and clear thought processes (for me as well), together with sincere if brief thanks for angel wings that had surrounded Ted. Slight calming.

Return call to the Deputy en route from parking lot to ER was brief with arrangement to connect later. He was busy, and so was I. He did appreciate confirmation of his original message being received; chuckled over Ted’s adamant demands to be taken home, not transported to any hospital by anyone. At least we didn’t need to cuff him; he finally got onto the gurney.

The Emergency Room counter staff was expecting me, and it was not difficult to locate Ted installed in a curtained cubicle, ER nurses and a staff physician in attendance. An IV drip had been started, pressure cuff and blood oxygen monitors activated, together with heart monitor. He truly appeared more embarrassed than injured, apologizing for interrupting my work schedule—again. Numerous GI bleed incidents, seizure incidents, unforeseen emergency stent procedure had been some of the interruptions over the years. Life has a way of doing that.

Examination continued and chest x-rays ordered. Bruising evident over his entire torso continued to spread as time passed. There were no apparent head injuries, obvious broken bones, nor did he complain of or admit to neck or back pain. His knuckles were scraped; oozing slightly, due to impact with the airbags. Washing his hands and applying a little salve was the only immediate treatment needed there. Otherwise, he appeared to be in relatively good shape—considering he attempted driving through a concrete block building complex. He was quite intent upon getting out of the ER.

Initial blood test results were well within acceptable range with exception of the Tegretol® (seizure control prescription), which was extremely high. Neither of us had any awareness an overly high reading for that particular drug was even a possibility. Ted was absolutely faithful in following all dosage instructions. In consultations with neurologists over several years no hint of any possible adverse reaction to a high level of the drug had ever been mentioned. Was that a contributing factor? Perhaps, or not. Concern had consistently been that dosage could be low and therefore insufficient to control seizure onset.

No remedies have yet been discovered, nor reliable causation of seizure onset been definitively identified by researchers and/or physicians over centuries. Recent surgical advances have proven effective in some very specific and limited types of activity; none was applicable in Ted’s case. At least epileptics are no longer consigned to mental asylums due to incidents, grand mal or petit. Until this date, his seizure episodes had not evoked major concern from any primary care physicians or neurologists over decades. Take appropriate medications in prescribed dosages, mitigate stress, maintain regular nutrition, rest and normal habits being the course to follow.

I had witnessed numerous incidents, which had occurred sporadically, but followed a somewhat predictable pattern. At onset he stared off into space, upper body stiff, fists clenched and on occasion shaking slightly. Anything in his hands, newspaper pages, sweet rolls, doughnuts, whatever, was crushed—reduced to shreds or crumbs. A non-communicative and unresponsive period followed. Subsequently, he relaxed and reestablished awareness of his surroundings. He generally responded appropriately to questions after a few minutes, with no memory of the ‘gap’. There was brief puzzlement over wrinkled pages and/or lap covered in crumbs. That normal and usual result; coined the medical reference in lay terms as absence seizures. Historically such occurrences were followed by headache. Unfortunately, late morning of May 22nd he happened to be driving, hands gripping the wheel, prepared for a left turn, not smushing a doughnut.

The absolutely fortunate element in this event was location, location, location. He was traveling on a multi-lane, one-way by-pass, approaching a largely vacated shopping mall on weed-infested bare land. He apparently went into seizure some two blocks short of that turn. Those turn directions from brain to nerves and muscles had already been transmitted. When his body stiffened with foot (now) firmly planted on the accelerator, clenched fists gripping the wheel, the little Nissan pick-up shot left, bounced over a side street, and spun in the weeds, impacted one of two 4" diameter rusty sign posts, changed course north, to an abrupt stop against the south wall of an empty building. The engine continued to run, in gear, rear wheels spinning, finally stalling, still in gear.

No other vehicles were involved, and only Ted was injured. We are so very blessed. In different circumstances this could very easily have been a major multi-vehicle accident resulting in numerous severe injuries if not fatalities.

Speaking with Deputy Michaels the next day after reviewing a fax copy of his Incident Report, he expressed appreciation and amazement that Ted’s travels off the by-pass were confined to vacant area. The other damage block on the incident report contained only: slight scratch on weathered concrete wall surface, no value. When I viewed the site later the tracks of Ted’s journey were clearly visible; the point of impact marked by a small oil spill on the scuffed dirt. Just which scratch on the weathered concrete block wall was made by Ted’s truck? Impossible to determine.

The Official Incident Report did not contain any notation of guardian angel squadrons having been observed in the vicinity that day—they must have stayed out of sight of the Deputy and EMT responders. Most thoughtful of their Commanding Officer. No indication at that time foretold how often over the next months and years they would be present, unseen, and how truly grateful I would be for that presence.

Following review of all tests, including blood work, x-rays and EKG back in the ER on May 22nd it was time to address whether he would be discharged or admitted for observation. Ted had been all for just getting the hell out of here and the quicker the better. He hadn’t wanted to be there in the first place. Now somewhat later he was not quite as determined and slightly more willing to consider medical opinion having some validity. His primary care physician had been notified and saw him as soon as possible following afternoon office appointments. From ER reports, she clearly understood he would still there.

My response to the query of leaving or being admitted was immediate: "He is going to stay for observation at least one night." That was far and away preferable to getting him home only to need an emergency return trip. Innumerable ‘midnight-hour’ trips to Emergency had been made over the years at onset of sudden and as yet indeterminate gastro-intestinal bleeding. Those ‘runs’ had been made in his little pick-up, which essentially did not now exist. Unknown was if Ted could even get into my little Miata now, much less ride in any comfort. At present it constituted our sole transportation option, but he wasn’t thinking of that just yet.

Reluctance to being admitted had lessened considerably as the adrenalin level dropped. He became increasingly aware of bruises, aches, pains, and the stiffness that began to set in. So, off we went up to a room in the Tower section of the hospital. There had been prior admits due to the bleed situations, with usual outcome his being tested for various possible (but still undetermined) diagnosis, transfused, monitored, observed, and discharged within a couple days. This was a new circumstance.

He was cleaned up a bit more with skinned knuckles tended to again, settled into bed with pain medication taking effect, and tv remote at hand. His dinner was ordered, and evening approached.

His primary care physician, Dr. Emily While arrived and test results were again reviewed. She definitely wanted him to remain at least one night and chart a course of treatment the following day. Initial physical therapy would begin, along with further evaluation. We both knew he would be a very stiff and sore boy by morning, even though he wouldn’t admit it. His regular evening meds, including the Tegretol® were sent up from Pharmacy, and it was time for me to get home, feed cats and update our concerned neighbors as to his adventures. They knew he had been in an accident, but