Horses Whispering: Finding Ourselves in the Company of Equus

By Ph. D. Mary Shealy R. N.

Horses Whispering emphasizes the unique bond between horses and people, suggesting that every hair on the horse is a biofeedback signal that the horse is responding to connectedness wit

• Language: English
• Publisher: BookTrail Publishing
• Release date: Mar 17, 2021
• ISBN: 9781637671139

Ph. D. Mary Shealy R. N.

Mary-Charlotte B. Shealy is the founder of the Success-Centered Riding and Training program, which has helped scores of adults enhance their lifelong dream of horseback riding. In addition, she developed the champion Appaloosa horses for which Brindabella Farms is known. She was also active in creating the preschool program that became a model for the state of Wisconsin and was active in creating the Missouri Equine Council.

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Copyright © 2021 Mary-Charlotte Shealy, R.N., Ph.D.

Paperback: 978-1-63767-112-2

eBook: 978-1-63767-113-9

Library of Congress Control Number: 2021903922

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law.

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Foreword by C. Norman Shealy

The most important event of my life was meeting and marrying Mary- Charlotte (Chardy) Bayles Shealy. For 52 years she was the light of my existence. Her lifelong love, long before we met, was animals. In fact my engagement gift to her was a 50 gallon aquarium, stocked with colorful fish. The first few years of our marriage we lived in cities, mostly in apartments. After the birth of our third child and daughter, we moved to LaCrosse, Wisconsin, with the express desire that we would be able to live on a farm and at least have the ability to do horseback riding.

Shortly after our arrival in LaCrosse in the summer of 1966, Chardy met Lois Heyerdahl and began dressage training. On our anniversary, June 13, 1967, I went horseback riding with her and that fall we went on a hunt. Having not ridden since age 12, I was, of course, on a Western saddle, jumping over 4 foot fences on a wonderful Appaloosa mare provided by Lois. One such experience taught me that I needed training on an English saddle. Six lessons with Lois and I never went back to a Western saddle. Like most men, I fit the saddle well and although I have never been an expert, I rode well and as an often as my busy career allowed. By 1968, Chardy needed her own horse for dressage. We were fortunate to get for her birthday an Appaloosa horse, Shadrick.

Shadrick was the beginning of our love of horses with color, the Appaloosa. In the fall of 1969, we moved to a 565 acre farm in the coulees outside LaCrosse and soon had acquired all too many horses. We named the farm Brindabella Farms, for a favorite picnic spot from our year in Australia. That November I wrote to Al Vermeer, the artist of Priscilla’s Pop, a wonderful cartoon, in which Priscilla always wanted a pony. I started with something like Yes, Priscilla, there is a Santa Claus. And I offered her an opportunity to visit Brindabella Farms anytime she liked. In the spring we named a filly BBF’s Priscilla. Al and Joie Vermeer visited for a gala celebration and we gave them another foal to take back to California. Over the next couple of years, Al did several cartoons with Priscilla visiting Brindabella Farms. He even did one with his visit to my barber.

Our next major development was the purchase of Illusion, a red leopard Appaloosa stallion, who for two years was the Grand Champion of the Wisconsin-Minnesota Appaloosa Club. His lineage became part of our foundation Appaloosa stock.

Then it was time for Illusion’s foal. We had a national contest to name her. The name chosen was BBF’s Chimera. For that occasion, I invited Jim Brolin to come for the celebration, at which the woman who had named Chimera was given another foal. With these two nationally advertised events and some showing of our horses at various horse shows, and the addition of Siri Spaniard, a champion stallion from Arizona, Chardy soon was managing 64 outstanding Appaloosa horses.

In 1982, when taxes in Wisconsin got as bad as winters, we moved to Missouri, to a 256 acre farm 14 miles north of Springfield, and cut our herd to 42 horses. The breeding of show quality Appaloosas continued until the mid 90’s. Meanwhile, Chardy had the idea that there was a need for a program for adults who had never ridden but wanted to start or for adults who had had a traumatic event and needed help getting back into riding. Chardy had met Barbara Joyce, and the two started a partnership, Success-Centered Riding and Training, SCRT ™. Intensive programs were developed for one to five students who came for 5 to 12 days of intensive training. Chardy also became active in helping develop the Missouri Equine Council and was herself trained in Sally Swift’s Centered Riding® program. She served on the board of that organization and was active in writing articles, doing the SCRT workshops and managing Brindabella Farms.

I never tired of watching Chardy’s skill and intuitive expertise in working with students and in training. She could be leading a horse on which sat a rider. Chardy could tell how the student was sitting and whether moving in sync with the horse or not! My favorite Chardy quote was Every hair on the horse is like a feedback antenna. Her rapport with the horses was complete. Although she was herself an outstanding horse whisperer, her concept was that the horses were whispering to us! This is her story.

Through the years, we have experienced a number of wonderful trainers. The final one was Shanna Nelson, who also has been with Chardy the longest. Shanna has polished the book and done all the illustrations. Without her finishing it, it could never have been completed.

Even though the SCRT program is no longer available, the information provided here is so valuable that I encourage instructors and riders to continue to benefit and build upon the legacy created! There is a great need for the wisdom found herein.

C. Norman Shealy, M.D., Ph.D.

Barbara Joyce Foreword

My resume wound up on Chardy’s desk in 1987. Neither of us knew how it got there but it was meant to be. Things happen for a reason, Chardy taught me that. And if you are open to it, there is generally a plan; you just have to listen.

I started training horses for Chardy at Brindabella Farms but it wasn’t long before we began team teaching in what would become the SCRT workshops. Using a curriculum and format designed by Chardy, the Success-Centered Riding and Training program targeted the needs of the adult rider. Unaware at the time, I soon learned that the adult rider tends to have issues that are often overlooked by the average riding instructor. Adults come to the lesson with a much larger agenda than younger students. Fear is commonly a big factor for mature riders. Time constraints and responsibilities can slow down their progress and physical limitations such as lack of fitness and old injuries have a significant effect on an adult’s confidence when riding. Many adults have had to forego riding for a period of time and, when finally having the chance to return to it, find themselves disconcerted as their coordination and mental focus has changed. Their ability to jump on and go has been altered.

Through life experiences, adults have learned to process material differently than their younger counterparts. It becomes harder to think in a linear fashion when one has learned to multi-task at a variety of levels. Memory functions differently and mind to body connections are slower. In general, the passion adults bring to the riding experience can be quickly met with frustration and disappointment unless there is consideration given to their needs. And that is where Chardy fit in. It was evident to her that a customized program suited to the novice adult rider was a necessity. She tailored the SCRT workshop agenda to address these requirements.

Chardy is gone now and I miss her. She gave my life a direction and a purpose that was unforeseen before I met her. Like many other people who have been fortunate enough to work with Chardy, I have a plan. I learned to listen. I now specialize in working with adults and their horses. And Chardy and I still team teach. Her objectivity, creativeness and insight add light to every lesson I have.

HORSES WHISPERING is a treasure of Chardy’s observations and experiences while teaching the SCRT workshops. It is a lifetime of study and reflection that Chardy has so generously shared with us. I guarantee you will benefit as a rider, instructor, as a trainer and as a person. And I know you will benefit from getting to know Chardy.

Barbara Joyce

Shanna Nelson Foreword

I  first met Mary-Charlotte Chardy Shealy while a freshman in college. I had been looking for a summer job and, through a rather remarkable set of coincidences, ended up being at just the right time and place to apply at Brindabella Farms. My interview with Chardy was nontraditional, to say the least, and I was quite unfamiliar with her insistence on doing body work prior to tacking up the horse I was to ride. She insisted that I, too, limber up before mounting, and before she turned me loose in the arena to take the horse through its paces, she led him around with me in the saddle, asking me to focus on the rhythm of both his stride and my breath.

Even after I had been working for her for some time, Chardy would still, on occasion, turn out to the arena where I rode for an impromptu lesson. She’d adjust my feet in the stirrups, perhaps, or have me pick up two-point, or even simply ask me to reach behind and lay my hands on the horse’s hips to feel the energy and motion contained within, in the hopes that I could in turn free up my own body and move more gracefully with the horse. And though it pained my teenage pride to admit it—I was young and talented and in need of no instruction, after all!—even then my body was sore from misuse, poor posture, and lack of appropriate conditioning, and the simple exercises that Chardy gave me to use always helped alleviate the pain and stiffness I didn’t even know I had.

I realize now, in retrospect, what an absolute boon Chardy’s program was to the adult riding crowd. she was gifted with patience and a keen ability to explain concepts. coupled with her knowledge of physical fitness, no doubt assisted by her career in nursing, Chardy’s intuitive understanding of horses and riders made her the ideal teacher for all those dealing with the unique concerns of adult riders.

Through her SCRT workshops (and by listening to the whispering of horses), Chardy amassed a lifetime of knowledge about adult rider instruction and the spiritual connection between equus and human that can drive the latter to great personal betterment and understanding. This book was to be her definitive work. Unfortunately, she departed this world before she had a chance to complete it. I was given the task of editing and compiling the fragments as she left them. There was much left unsaid, but I did not feel that I could do the subject justice in the way she would have tackled it with her own unique insight. Thus, Horses Whispering remains incomplete. still, its pages have much to offer to the riding instructor who has hit a roadblock in his or her teaching, or perhaps to the timid adult first beginning a relationship with horses and needing a boost in this strange new world. nearly anyone involved with horses, however, could glean something useful from this book. For, as chardy would say, as we venture onward bound with equus, we venture inward bound on our journey of self-discovery!

Shanna Nelson

ONWARD BOUND

EQUUS: Partner and metaphor in a journey of self-fulfillment

INTRODUCTION

For whatever we are longing, the kind horse strives to fill the void.

Equus: horses, ponies, donkeys, zebras… and dare not forget the mule! Partnered with humans for thousands of years, equines have generated enough stories and memories to title every star in the universe. Is there a person who cannot recall at least one equus-connected tale? For some, one tale is one too many, yet for countless others there is a longing to connect with equus in some meaningful way, to become horsepeople . Relatively few people are lucky enough (recognizing that there are those who would say stupid enough) to live closely with equus. today, however, horses, ponies, donkeys, zebras, and mules are more accessible to more people as friend, partner, teacher and therapist than perhaps ever before. a remarkably growing share of those seeking these relationships are adults, people who may have ridden as children and who then took other journeys, people who have only dreamed of riding or of simply being close to a horse, and people who have sought (or been prescribed) a therapeutic riding relationship of some kind. For many, their journey with equus is transforming, an adventure of self-discovery and personal empowerment.

Connie¹ understands. her journey with equus began hopelessly. her beloved horse, knickers, consistently ran away with her when she rode him, but never when her friends rode him. From Carson City, Kansas (where everybody rides, she declared forlornly), Connie was in her early thirties, regretting a divorce, and fearful of other failures. In a moment of dejection and frustration, she had signed up for a two week long intense riding workshop for adults 1000 miles from home. a welcomed escape, she admitted later. Connie jotted on her registration form, I want to become a more confident rider. What this gentle, anxious veterinary assistant did not say was that her lifelong poor self-image had driven her even to have facial plastic surgery as a teenager in a vain attempt to feel better about herself.

On a sunny May day, Connie arrived for the riding workshop weary from the trip, and as usual feeling at a low ebb emotionally. From the first day, five riders worked progressively with five horses and two instructors; the course was physically, mentally and emotionally demanding. Connie’s personal struggles were further draining her energies. on the morning of the third day, she leaped off the horse she was riding mid-lesson, sobbing uncontrollably, and marched out of the arena, declaring that she was going back to Kansas.

One of the riding instructors strode after her, grabbed her by the arm and insisted, you are not leaving until you have looked after your horse! who was by then standing dejectedly in the arena exactly where his rider had abandoned him. overwhelmed with emotion, Connie returned passively to the arena, standing quietly with her horse until the session was finished. she acknowledged later that the instructor’s intervention had "hit me like a thunderbolt. I had this immediate image of knickers running away. he was running away for me! I was devastated, exhausted, yet strangely relieved. I could see now that I had spent my life running from the shadow of my earliest memories, my parents’ declaring that I was ‘ugly.’ Meeting privately with the instructor after the arena incident, Connie tearfully agreed to honor the agreement I made with myself" and complete the two week workshop. she ricocheted between competing emotions: a struggling seedling of growing self-confidence and a looming fear of the returning darkness from which she would run.

As Connie became physically stronger over the two weeks, she was helpfully distracted by the volume of equine-related knowledge and skills she was absorbing. she completed the workshop victorious and sparkling, yet shadowed by a lingering remnant of anxiety: Would knickers run away with her again? happily, he did not. In fact, Connie’s journey with equus, begun so painfully, continued joyfully at home, the transformation taking root and rewarding Connie personally and professionally. For so it is: onward bound in our partnership with equus, this earthly survivor reflects our soul’s authenticity. The picture is not always to our liking, yet the teacher is receptive to our making improvements!

In July of 1986, five adult riders gathered for two weeks at a small conference center at a horse farm on a rolling green prairie in southwest Missouri’s Ozarks for the inaugural success-centered Riding/training Workshop (SCRTM). They had come to sharpen their riding skills and hone their horse sense, fellow adventurers converging on uncharted territory. as in all workshops since, these adults came from near and far, each with a unique personal story. Though they had never met before, they shared a hunger for know-how and an eagerness to succeed. equus, they soon learned, was to take them on a journey of self-discovery, of personal possibilities. Success could be transforming. Equus would be doing a lot of whispering!

Ellie was a sturdy west coast factory worker and housewife. She had a wry sense of humor that during the two weeks would lighten the dark moments of riders’ stretching their bodies to an unfamiliar maximum. Ken, a house builder from Tennessee, had three horses, but claimed, I don’t have a clue about riding, and not much more about taking care of the horses. Sylvia was a physician in her forties from Georgia. She was intrigued with hot horses (they’re pretty), and acknowledged that she was too afraid to ride her hyper three year old mare. Sylvia had always wanted to ride, but did not have much time to learn because of her demanding career. She was hoping that in two weeks she could master the skills she would need.

Hope, in fact, is the powerful incentive that has often carried the day for adult riders as they mobilize reluctant joints and surge forward on a wave of enthusiasm, if little else. The fourth rider, Louise, was from the east coast, also in her forties. She was the most experienced equestrian of the five, but she had had two scary falls from one of her horses recently. While she was not seriously hurt, she felt that something is lacking about my riding skills. She was also a confirmed smoker. The fifth rider, Ginny, introduced herself frankly: I want to ride better and I am terrified of falling off. She was also significantly overweight and bothered by the heat. Ginny was a full time dispatcher for a Midwest trucking company. Her job was largely sedentary; in summer her office and home were air conditioned. She lamented that the riding arena is not!

As I gazed around the lecture room at this group of hopeful individuals, listening to their introductions while they entrusted their well being and dreams to our judgment, I wondered if I was out of my mind to pursue my own dream: offering intense, brief workshops to introduce adults to riding or to help them improve and update their skills. While listening to the wish list of the assembled group, I noticed their mostly out-of-shape bodies and heard their desire to progress quickly. To my grateful astonishment, I was soon to learn that the hope, motivation and goals wrapped up in an enthusiasm for equus can power an extraordinary, enduring engine of transformation, often not only in riding. Our riding process is often intimately entwined with our life attitudes and our conversations with our equine partners. Equus is remorselessly candid!

In conjuring up the SCRT program, I had gone out on a twig, so to speak. I could find no models for these workshops in the United States or Europe, yet I sensed that the already developing adult market was about to explode, partly because of women’s growing economic independence. Why had others in the industry not risen to meet the need? One noted coach/ trainer explained at the time that adults were unappealing and frustrating students because they could not give him their undivided time, and were too distracted with non-horse-related responsibilities. Many instructors expressed frank wariness of teaching beginning or returning adult riders; their experience had largely centered on teaching children.

This viewpoint was affirmed by Jeff, an acquaintance, who asked to visit during one of the first two-week SCRT Intensives. A respected and amiable riding instructor and trainer from a nearby community, Jeff wanted to see how things are going. He stood quietly by the arena as we worked through the morning riding session. As he got ready to depart later, Jeff acknowledged why he had come.

A couple of years back, I thought I would like to do this kind of thing as a weekend clinic. I knew there were lots of adults who wanted to learn to ride. The first clinic I did was the last. He looked down, seemingly apologetic. A father, a new rider, brought his 13 year old boy so that they could ride together, he explained. At one point on the first day, I corrected the young man, and he burst into tears. Honest to God, I had never seen a kid cry like that. I didn’t know what to do. So, I said to myself, ‘This is your last clinic.’ And it was. I knew I was in over my head. Watching today, I know I made the right decision.

I related immediately to the discomfort of his bewilderment. Years before, as a nurse, I was leading a quiet relaxation exercise with a group of adult patients in a clinic. Suddenly one of them began sobbing loudly and uncontrollably. I too felt panicked. Fortunately, there was a psychologist nearby to help me out, and to teach me what to do in the future. In fact, my experiences during the first and subsequent SCRT workshops convinced me that I was onto a challenge for which I had unwittingly been preparing professionally for years in a variety of ways. What I had simplistically envisioned as an intense workshop to teach adults to ride, or to reintroduce them to riding after a long absence, or to help them smooth out the glitches and move off the plateaus that were standing in the way of their riding progress has in fact provided for many a turning point in their lives. The process of their deepening partnership with equus has often significantly shaped and colored their personal goals, revised the tempo and tenor of their professional activities and relationships, and yes, markedly influenced their future adventures with horses.

Riding a horse is both simple and enormously complex. Wrapping the most intimate parts of ourselves around the horse can evoke powerful feelings in both rider and horse. The riding partnership not uncommonly confronts or even surprises the rider with emotional and physical challenges that have long stood in the way of their realizing their desires not simply while riding, but in other of life’s domains. Equus becomes the metaphor for the rider’s human partners, both personal and professional. How this partnership evolves can have a significant impact on a rider’s human relationships and personal goals whether they continue riding or not. Happily, the challenge that partnering with a horse presents often quickly becomes the welcomed pathway to new and useful discoveries on several levels. Riders notice that they are overcoming and moving forward past what had seemed in their lives heretofore to be insurmountable hurdles, confusing choices, or a frightening vast abyss without a bridge.

Over the years, the SCRT riders have contributed ideas, equipment and teaching tools that have enriched the program for those following them. Most importantly, they have offered themselves, their life journeys, their yearnings, their frustrations, their comedies, in fact, a mosaic of personal gifts that have added great depth and breadth in countless ways to what we can offer as teachers. These are now being shared with other riding instructors who come to learn as well.

The most common challenge for the majority of riders is simply scheduling time for concentrated work amid their often hectic careers. Some prefer the privacy and convenience of an intense workshop where they can work alone with an instructor for several days. Others choose a longer, small-group experience. The need common to all of these adult riders is to learn why, what, how, and when, to know that absolutes are rarer than choices, to acknowledge that choices can sometimes be bewildering, to understand equus and themselves, to improve their physical conditioning in a way that will enhance their riding progress, and to feel permitted to honor their common sense, intuition and creativity. Perhaps most challenging of all to most adult riders is to become reacquainted with their own bodies, to be