A Flatlander Finds Adventure in Maine: Mis-Adventures in the Great Pine Tree State

By Steve Hood

A city slicker and family move to the wilds of Maine. A fun-filled, and funny, adventure down memory lane, laced with that wry Yankee humor, amusing incidents, laugh out loud guffaws, and head-scratchers like, how on earth did he manage to do that? Tickles the funny bone, at the same time, may create a desire in the reader to immediately move to Maine, or at the very least, visit ASAP!

• Language: English
• Publisher: Steve Hood
• Release date: Nov 4, 2020
• ISBN: 9798201679736

Book preview

A FLATLANDER FINDS ADVENTURE IN MAINE

ADVENTURES, (MISADVENTURES) IN THE GREAT PINE TREE STATE

STEVE HOOD

CONTENTS

Introduction

City Boy Moves To The Wilds Of Down East Maine

Of Airlines And Odd-looking Cows

Bankin’ The House

Livin’ Off The Land

The Boating Incident

When Nature Calls

You Mean They Actually Eat Those Giant Bugs?

Goin’ To Camp

Close Encounters Of The Outhouse Kind

Guess Who’s Coming To Dinner?

Searching For Miss Sue

The Road To Riches

Yes, The Flatlander Was Fooled Again

The Great American Pie Heist

About the Author

INTRODUCTION

The story is based on actual events. Although the personalities and incidents may be embellished, even exaggerated, they are mostly true. It's about how a flatlander residing in Florida fumbled and bumbled his way through the Pine Tree State.

What inspired the story was a trip my beloved made to her home state of Maine in the Summer of 2018. It was intended to be a relatively short visit, or so I understood. A short vacation to her former hometown in Maine. She usually stays about three weeks, but before I knew it, several weeks had passed, and I became concerned. She had planned to return home on a specific date and well, she didn't. I made inquiries, but no one seemed to know exactly where she was. It was tough tracking her down because she was on the road traveling a great deal, and her cell phone did not work well. Actually, it worked; she just rarely turned it on.

That's when I knew I had to drive up from Florida to find her. Before I proceed with this story, I should probably provide some history to my readers. All eleven of them, assuming some of my loyal family members decide to see what I'm up to these days.

There was a time when I lived in the great state of Maine. It was a very long time ago. So long ago the world was still flat. Like everyone, this part of my story begins at my birth. I was born in Massachusetts to transplanted Mainers, and soon after my birth, they decided to move to Connecticut. It's not that I wanted to move, but I didn’t have much say as an infant. I know, Connecticut isn't Maine, but I'm getting to that.

Speaking of my birth, legend has it the doctor, instead of slapping my bottom, slapped my face. But then, I probably deserved it. Without further ado, let’s get to the