War/Peace - Part II: Princess of America

By Clarissa Daisy Huntsman

Following the nuclear attack on Sydney at the end of 2011, the political climate in the United States becomes very heated.

Kim Jong-un is responsible for the attack and now it is Barack Obama's intent to retaliate and hit North Korea where it hurts.

Unfortunately this would spell the start of World War III - a nuclear war.

In the political shadows, somewhere in southern Utah, near the border with Nevada, live a peculiar Honeybee/Mormon/Hippie community - bizarre but peaceful. And one member happens to be an adopted daughter of Jon Huntsman Junior.

So the election campaigning begins, and we find Obama pitted against Huntsman. Obama wants a third world war, Huntsman wants peace.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Tablo Publishing
• Release date: Apr 6, 2021
• ISBN: 9781649696625

Book preview

Episode One: Waiting On*

Waiting On The World to Change - John Mayer (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oBIxScJ5rlY&ob=av3e)

******

INT. LONE STAR RESTAURANT (POSSIBLY IN SALT LAKE CITY) - BAG ROOM - NIGHT

(CASSIE, CLARISSA, CLARE)

THE FIRST IMAGE WE SEE IS OF THE LATE CASSIE, CLARISSA'S SISTER. CLARISSA IS WATCHING FOOTAGE OF CASSIE ON HER iPHONE.

CASSIE (OLD FOOTAGE)

This is great. I'm here sis. Sydney Football Stadium. It's amazing.

WE SEE THE STADIUM. IT'S FULL OF PEOPLE. EMINEM IS ABOUT TO TAKE THE STAGE. HE'S ON THE SYDNEY LEG OF HIS 2011 TOUR.

CASSIE (OF)

As you can see I'm right behind the security fence. I got such a good view of him. Dad's gonna wanna watch this.

FINALLY WE SEE CLARISSA, HOLDING THE iPHONE. A TEAR IS ROLLING DOWN HER CHEEK. SHE HAS HER EARPHONES IN AND IS WEARING A HOODIE. THE HOOD COVERS HER EARS, A STYLE REMINISCENT OF CASSIE IN THE MUSIC VIDEO ME & U [1.] OR ETHAN HUNT IN THE FINAL SCENE OF "MISSION IMPOSSIBLE - GHOST PROTOCOL [2.].

CLARE ENTERS THE ROOM

CLARE

Your mission, should you choose to accept it . . .

CLARISSA WIPES A TEAR AWAY IN SUCH A MANNER IT APPEARS AS THOUGH SHE IS SCRATCHING HER FACE. SHE REMOVES HER EARPHONES AND LOOKS UP.

CLARE

. . . is to make food. Come on Ethan Hunt, we got work to do.

CLARISSA SMILES

CLARISSA

You lot are so lost without me.

CLARISSA AND CLARE EXIT THE ROOM.

******

Nemec, A. [Writer], Appelbaum, J. [Writer], Bird, B. [Director], & Cruise, T. [Actor]. (2011). Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol. Hollywood, California: Paramount Pictures.

Me & U - Cassie (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2qgKIaxiPLY&ob=av2e)

******

INT. LONE STAR RESTAURANT - KITCHEN - NIGHT

(CLARISSA, CLARE, MATT, DYLAN, JESSICA)

CLARISSA WALKS BRISKLY TO THE FOOD PREPARATION COUNTER. THERE IS LOTS OF BANGING AND SHOUTING. ALL THE WORKERS IN THE KITCHEN ARE BUSY; TO THE LEFT OF CLARISSA DYLAN IS WASHING DISHES IN THE DISH AREA, TO THE RIGHT MATT IS SPRINKLING CHEDDAR ONTO A PLATE FULL OF CHIPS. ABOVE HER HEAD A NEW ORDER IS BEING PRINTED.

CLARISSA RIPS THE PIECE OF PAPER FROM THE SMALL PRINTER.

A DING SOUNDS.

CLARISSA

Matt, grab the cheese bread for me from the oven. But first chuck two schnitzels into the basket. We got two steak sandwiches, two parms, and a Caesar salad. So we're gonna need two burger buns in the oven too.

CLARISSA PASSES THE SLIP OF PAPER TO CLARE. CLARISSA LIFTS A LARGE CIRCULAR PLATE FROM THE HIGH SHELF IN FRONT OF HER AND TROTS TO THE FRONT OF THE KITCHEN. SHE PICKS UP SOME LETTUCE AND PUTS IT ON THE PLATE.

AGAIN A SLIP OF PAPER EMERGES FROM THE PRINTER. CLARISSA TAKES THE PLATE OF LETTUCE BACK TO HER BENCH AND THEN RETRIEVES THE SLIP.

MATT RETURNS WITH THE CHEESE BREAD.

CLARISSA

Once you've cut that, I need two regs, and some chips dropped.

MATT

Yep.

CLARISSA TURNS AROUND AND REMOVES A LARGE PLATEFUL OF CHIPS FROM A HIGH OVEN. SHE HOLDS IT FROM BELOW IN THE MIDDLE WITH THE TIPS OF FOUR FINGERS AND RETRIEVES A LARGE PLATE FROM THE HIGH SHELF WITH HER OTHER HAND BEFORE PLACING THE PLATE OF HOT CHIPS ONTO THIS SECOND ONE AND BOTH ONTO THE MAIN COUNTER.

CLARISSA

Runners!

JESSICA - A WAITRESS - WALKS IN.

JESSICA

You won't believe what the customers are talking about out there? We got some liberals at one side of the restaurant and some conservatives on the other side. I'm expecting a massive food fight any minute now.

CLARISSA

Good. Then it's not gonna matter if the chips get cold.

JESSICA

Which means I get to have a drink while you continue to cook.

CLARISSA

Nice try. You're taking these out. And while you're out there, tell 'em you're a liberal conservative [1.] [2.]; don't take sides whatever you do.

DYLAN

What if the conservatives hear liberal before she gets a chance to finish?

JESSICA

The chips are sides.

CLARISSA

Ha ha.

JESSICA TAKES THE PLATES OF CHIPS AWAY.

CLARISSA LOOKS UP AT THE CLOCK.

CLARISSA

It's nine. That's my shift. Clare - you got Matt for the night.

DYLAN

That's me too.

CLARE

Matt, you're on dish.

CLARISSA

Bye guys.

CLARE

Bye.

DYLAN

See ya.

MATT

See ya.

CLARISSA WAVES BYE AND THEN REMOVES HER APRON. AS SHE WALKS TO THE FRONT OF THE HOUSE SHE PLACES THE HOOD BACK OVER HER HEAD.

******

Weber, C. R., & Federico, C. M. (2011). [Abstract]. Moral Foundations and Heterogeneity in Ideological Preferences. Unpublished Manuscript, Louisiana State University and University of Minnesota, America. Retrieved through personal correspondence with Christopher Federico 24th November, 2011.

Weber, C. R., & Federico, C. M. (2011). [p. 25,

2]. Moral Foundations and Heterogeneity in Ideological Preferences. Unpublished Manuscript, Louisiana State University and University of Minnesota, America. Retrieved through personal correspondence with Christopher Federico 24th November, 2011.

******

INT. BATHROOM OF CLUB - NIGHT

(CLARISSA, EMILY)

THE GIRLS ARE AT A CLUB SOMEWHERE IN SALT LAKE CITY. THIS IS THE FIRST TIME WE SEE EMILY. SHE IS A CLOSE FRIEND OF CLARISSA. THEY ARE BOTH APPLYING MAKE-UP AND GAZING INTO THE MIRROR. CLARISSA STARTS TO FUMBLE THROUGH HER PURSE.

CLARISSA

Em, do you have any mints?

EMILY

Probably. You know we don't need them. They should be locking our breath in pretty little droplets.

CLARISSA

Not if I eat anchovies.

EMILY

What is it with you and anchovies?

CLARISSA

You know I can't resist umami [1.]. Anchovies have it [1.], and that intoxicating taste. Soon as I see them on a menu at a bar I just gotta order them. Plus they're high in omega-3 [2.]. I've had anchovies in almost every country I've been to. I still wonder why the manager at Lone Star doesn't wanna add them to the Caesar Salad. I told her I'll cover the cost.

EMILY

Still don't get why you work there. You don't need the money.

CLARISSA

Maybe I like it. People are great, atmosphere's great, the interactions are art [3.]. Same reason we come here. And I'm never gonna lose touch with ordinary people and live in a silly little bubble like dad.

EMILY

I know. I know. But if you did then I'd be in the bubble with you, right?

CLARISSA

You'll always be in my bubble.

CLARISSA PECKS EMILY ON THE CHEEKS.

CLARISSA

Mess your hair. We don't wanna look like a million bucks . . . or too clean [4.].

EMILY SMILES. SHE RUNS SOME FINGERS THROUGH HER HAIR, AND THEN CLARISSA'S. THEY LEAVE THE BATHROOM HAND IN HAND.

******

Hirsch, M. L. (2011). Yum's the word. Psychology Today, 44 (4), 46-47.

Henrich, S. (2011). The fat chronicles. [Fish fanatics]. Psychology Today, 44 (4), 48.

Sehgal, T. [Artist], & Simonini, R. [Writer] (2011). Immaterial guy. Psychology Today, 44 (4), 30-31.

Ryerson, N. (2011). Virtuous reality. Psychology Today, 44 (4), 44. [Now that's 4play. Lol.]

******

INT. NIGHTCLUB - NIGHT

(CLARISSA, EMILY, MATTHEW)

CLARISSA AND EMILY SIT AT A TABLE ON THE HIGH LEVEL IN A SPLIT LEVEL CLUB. THEY HAVE A CLEAR VIEW OF THE DANCE FLOOR AND THE BAR. THEY BOTH SIP ON BACARDIS.

[1.]

CLARISSA

More guys than girls. You know that they're short 163 million females in Asia? - that's the entire female population of the States [2.].

EMILY

What? Why?

CLARISSA

Sex selection [2.]. Parents choosing sons over daughters. What it means is that there are a lot of lonely guys in Asia. Fortunately things are a little different here in America; parents want daughters [2.]. And if women outnumber men in the States then that's a fine argument for polygyny, but if you look at the situation from a global perspective then this is an argument just as firm for polyandry. Dad doesn't get that.

EMILY

Your dad's in favor of polygamy?

CLARISSA

Polygyny. But not publicly. Obviously.

EMILY

Oh. Right.

CLARISSA

Guy. Nine o'clock.

EMILY TURNS HER HEAD LEFT. A GUY SITS AT THE BAR. HE TWIRLS HIS FINGER IN WHAT LOOKS LIKE MARTINI. EVERY NOW AND THEN HE LOOKS UP AND SURVEYS THE DANCE FLOOR. HE TAPS HIS KNEE BUT APPEARS TO HAVE MISPLACED THE BEAT, AND EVERY TIME HE GAZES AT THE BAR IT'S AS THOUGH HE'S SEARCHING HARD FOR IT. HE APPEARS NERVOUS.

[3.]

CLARISSA

Try and get his attention. Poor guy. He looks so lost.

EMILY

Sure. But I ain't helping strays all night.

CLARISSA

Just until he's fit enough for us to release him back into the wild.

CLARISSA SMILES. EMILY LAUGHS.

CLARISSA

He's looking. Now. Wink. Wave.

EMILY FOLLOWS SUIT. THEY EACH WINK AND WAVE AT THE GUY. THE GUY GRINS. HE NERVOUSLY APPROACHES THE TWO GIRLS. EVERY STEP HE TAKES APPEARS REHEARSED, PLANNED, QUITE CONTRIVED. HIS GAZE HITS THE GROUND LIKE TORRENTIAL RAIN BUT EVERY NOW AND THEN ITS CUTE SHADOW BRUSHES THE SILKY CHEEKS OF CLARISSA AND EMILY.

MATTHEW

Um . . . is this seat taken? I don't mean to be rude, I was just wondering if . . .

CLARISSA

. . . you could sit down?

EMILY

We winked at you, and waved at you.

MATTHEW

Me?

CLARISSA

Yes. Silly. Come on.

CLARISSA OFFERS MATTHEW HER HAND.

CLARISSA

I'm Clarissa, and this is my friend Emily. You are?

MATTHEW SHAKES CLARISSA'S HAND AND TAKES A SEAT.

MATTHEW

Um . . . Matthew.

CLARISSA

Matthew. I work with a guy named Matt. Common name. What brings you here Matthew?

MATTHEW

Travelling.

EMILY

You're not from around here?

MATTHEW

I'm from Florida. I'm having a look at out of state universities.

CLARISSA

You do have the internet don't you?

MATTHEW

Well, yeah. But I wanted to travel.

EMILY

So you could find bars where you can sit and stir Martinis huh, Bond?

CLARISSA EASILY READS THE SLIGHT DISCOMFORT ON MATTHEW'S FACE. TO HIM REJECTION'S A WIND AND DISTANCE IS A COMFY COAT.

CLARISSA

Ignore her. What she means to say is; She would like you to touch her breasts the way you did that Martini.

EMILY

Clarissa!

MATTHEW LAUGHS. HE LOOKS DOWN AT THE TABLE.

CLARISSA

What do you study?

MATTHEW

Just Arts. Thinking of Philosophy. I like creative writing a lot.

EMILY

No need for a pen. Just take film, take pics, or record voice. Even right here, right now; this is something you can write . . . like, not even about, you could just write down every word we say.

MATTHEW

That's true.

CLARISSA

What type of creative writing. Comedy, drama?

MATTHEW

I guess drama.

EMILY

Comedy's the way to go; Two and a Half Men, Seinfeld, South Park . . .

[4.]

MATTHEW

I love those shows. But I can't write that well. I wanna write the script for a show like Skins one day but . . .

CLARISSA

But you need inspiration.

MATTHEW

Well, I was gonna say that I'm not good enough but . . .

CLARISSA PUTS A FINGER TO MATTHEW'S LIPS

CLARISSA

Write.

MATTHEW REACHES INTO HIS POCKET. EMILY GRABS HIS ARM, SHAKING HER HEAD.

CLARISSA

No Matthew. Setting the scene right here in this club, and without prescribing us any illegal acts, write us. Write this scene.

MATTHEW

Are you . . . serious? Really?

CLARISSA AND EMILY NOD.

MATTHEW

I guess . . . like . . . I would touch your cheek.

CLARISSA TAKES MATTHEW'S HAND AND PLACES IT AGAINST HER CHEEK.

MATTHEW

Even though we have never seen one another before I'm drawn into this triangle as though the bond between two good friends is contagious . . .

CLARISSA LEANS TOWARD MATTHEW. MATTHEW TAKES A DEEP BREATH.

EMILY

Don't lose your breath now, Matthew. You're controlling the speed.

MATTHEW

The . . . their lips touch.

CLARISSA TOUCHES MATTHEW'S LIPS WITH HERS. MATTHEW'S SILENT, SO THE SCENE REMAINS STATIC . . . 10 SECONDS . . . 20. THEN MATTHEW TOUCHES CLARISSA'S CHEEK AGAIN.

EMILY

You're not narrating that touch.

MATTHEW REMOVES HIS LIPS FROM CLARISSA'S AND SMILES. CLARISSA SHRUGS.

CLARISSA

Short story.

MATTHEW

I'm sorry. It's silly.

CLARISSA

Not the kiss I hope.

MATTHEW

No. My writing.

CLARISSA

But you're writing with your body and your body's just fine. So are your lips. Guess you are a Bond.

MATTHEW

Thanks.

EMILY

Can I write something?

MATTHEW

Of course.

EMILY GRABS MATTHEW'S ARM AND PULLS HIM TOWARD HER. THEN SHE TOO PRESSES HER LIPS AGAINST HIS.

CLARISSA

Ok, Matthew. Feel the testosterone now?

MATTHEW

Ha ha. Um . . . yeah.

CLARISSA

Good, coz we gotta go. But we need you to promise us you'll ask some of these beautiful girls if you can buy them a drink . . .

CLARISSA POINTS AT THE BAR. THEN SHE AND EMILY STAND.

CLARISSA

Ok?

MATTHEW

Yeah. Uh . . . It was nice meeting you. Um . . . are you on Facebook?

CLARISSA STEPS AWAY FROM THE TABLE.

CLARISSA

No. Because my dad might be President one day. But maybe then. Bye.

CLARISSA AND EMILY HURRY OFF. MATTHEW REMAINS AT THE TABLE, SPEECHLESS. HE EXHALES.

******

Like I Love You - Justin Timberlake, Clipse, and Pharrell Williams (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FQ3slUz7Jo8&ob=av2e)

Hvistendahl, M. (2011). Unnatural selection. Psychology Today, 44 (4), 80-87.

Yeah - Usher, Lil Jon, and Ludacris (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AyIX_Pn7Ij0)

We Made You – Eminem and Dina Rae (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RSdKmX2BH7o&ob=av2e)

McGarr, E. (2007). Anchovy power! Those yucky little fish could save your life. Columbia News Service (Online). Retrieved January 4, 2011 from http://jscms.jrn.columbia.edu/.../mcgarr-eatyouranchovies...

******

EXT. SALT LAKE STREETS - NIGHT

(CLARISSA, EMILY)

CLARISSA AND EMILY HAVE LEFT THE CLUB. THEY ARE WALKING DOWN A BUSY MAIN STREET, BRIGHTLY LIT AND PACKED WITH PEOPLE. THE NIGHT LIFE IS LOUD AND LIVELY.

EMILY

That was amazing Clarissa.

CLARISSA

Yeah. That guy's gonna remember that kiss for the rest of his life. But I'm thinking I should maybe cool it on the Presidential speak.

EMILY

Why? You never told the guy your dad's name.

CLARISSA

I feel like if I'm not careful I'm gonna lose all this. Just one damn reporter and I'll be in the public eye. Then I'll have to kiss goodbye my job at Lone Star, and this night life. But . . .

CLARISSA TILTS HER HEAD BACK AND STARES UP AT THE SKY. THEN SHE BRINGS IT DOWN SO THAT HER GAZE PENETRATES THE HAZE OF EXCITEMENT ONCE AGAIN.

CLARISSA

Sometimes I so just wanna find some reporter and totally fuck him just to see what happens.

EMILY

If he's cute that's fine by me.

CLARISSA

But then I'll be put under house arrest, cut off from everyone [5.] [6.] [7.]; probably even you. And no matter how good my dad's place is it's no substitute for these streets [5.] [6.] [7.].

EMILY

But you'll be the next Lindsey Lohan.

CLARISSA

But then my dad won't be the next president.

EMILY

You really have that much influence?

CLARISSA

No. But the media does. And if I do something sleazy then they're bound to make sure it reflects badly on dad. Spin. Just like the advertisers telling us what we gotta buy to be happy. Fact is, though, Americans are getting more and more depressed [1.] [2.] [3.]. We don't know what we want so we buy whatever they tell us to and forget about our communities, experiences, relationships and all that [8.] [9.]. I would seriously hate to be locked away in a lonely mansion. I need to go out and know I can get that chemical rush [4.] again and again.

EMILY

Which is why you and I gotta find guys we can fall in love with for the night . . . but try not to mention who you are.

CLARISSA SMILES.

CLARISSA

I can try. But it's hard not to blurt it out.

EMILY

Well, either you keep it a secret or you'll find yourself stuck in a nuclear family, no way out.

CLARISSA STOPS WALKING. SHE BOWS HER HEAD.

EMILY

Clarissa!

CLARISSA WIPES AN EYE. SHE TAKES A DEEP BREATH.

EMILY

Clarissa! Are you ok?

CLARISSA LOOKS AT EMILY. HER GAZE SPEAKS A THOUSAND WORDS. AND THEY ECHO OFF THE SALT WATER DROPLETS THAT REST IN HER EYES.

CLARISSA

Um . . . sorry. Don't mention nuclear please.

EMILY

Oh. Cassie. Clarissa, I'm so sorry.

CLARISSA TAKES ANOTHER DEEP BREATH. SHE LOOKS AROUND.

CLARISSA

Pick a club, any club.

EMILY POINTS TO THE ONE RIGHT IN FRONT OF THEM AND THEN THEY BOTH WALK TOWARD IT.

*****

Sandler, L. (2011). [As Andrew Oswald, who studies the intersection of economics and happiness at the University of Warwick, in Britain, states, The U.S.A. has, in aggregate, apparently become more miserable over the last quarter of a century."]. The American nightmare. Psychology Today, 44 (2), 70-77.

Eyunni, A. (2011). [Abstract]. On the Determinants of Happiness. Social Science Research Network. Retrieved January 6, 2011 from http://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cfm?abstract_id=1889222

Oswald, A. (2006, January 19). [p. 1]. The Hippies Were Right all Along about Happiness. Financial Times (Online). Retrieved January 6, 2011 from http://www.andrewoswald.com/docs/fthappinessjan96.pdfSandler, L. (2011). [Here we look to that incredible emotional rush when you've just fallen in love, which we know physiologically doesn't stay that way--it can't, says sociologist Linda Waite, who studies marriage at the University of Chicago.]. The American nightmare. Psychology Today, 44 (2), 70-77.

Carlin, F. (2011). [Now that Americans have their dream homes, many are setting up substitute institutions in the living room--and taking on the roles of preacher, teacher, and boss. There are many reasons we're increasingly home-centric, among them an overarching sense that Americans, being Americans, want the freedom to educate and support themselves and their children in the way they see fit, not the way that supposed authority figures would have it. But a possible consequence is that all of this insular socializing puts even more pressure on families, cutting them off from the diversity and connectedness of the proverbial village.]. Stay-at-home nation: Is public life moving indoors? Psychology Today, 44 (2), 74.

Sandler, L. (2011). [Add to that, he [Andres Duany] says, the loss of authentic connections that comes from the distinctly American notion of homeownership that plays a key part in fulfilling the dream: you purchase a private realm--your home--to replace a public sphere that no longer exists.]. The American nightmare. Psychology Today, 44 (2), 70-77.

Duany, A., Plater-Zyberk, E., & Speck, J. (2010). [Blurb]. Suburban Nation: The Rise of Sprawl and the Decline of the American Dream (2nd Ed.). New York, America: Farrar, Straus and Giroux. Blurb retrieved January 6, 2011 from http://books.google.com.au/books?id=aBNu7zLlcRcC&dq=Suburban+Nation:+The+Rise+of+Sprawl+and+the+Decline+of+the+American+Dream+%E2%80%9D&hl=en&sa=X&ei=XWQGT5LBAemImQXRnpzwBw&ved=0CDEQ6AEwAA

Sandler, L. (2011). [The more people focus on a materialistic pathway to happiness, the less happy they tend to be, and the less happy they make others, he [Tim Kasser] says.]. The American nightmare. Psychology Today, 44 (2), 70-77.

Kasser, T., & Ryan, R. M. (1993). [Abstract]. A dark side of the American dream: Correlates of financial success as a central life aspiration. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 65 (2), 410-422. doi: 10.1037/0022-3514.65.2.410 Retrieved January 6, 2011 from http://psycnet.apa.org/journals/psp/65/2/410/

Chemical Rush - Brian McFadden (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PnrSosAHlrY)

Numb - Linkin Park (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kXYiU_JCYtU&ob=av2n)

Sandler, L. (2011). The American nightmare. Psychology Today, 44 (2), 70-77.

******

INT. NIGHTCLUB - NIGHT

(CLARISSA, EMILY)

EMILY'S AT THE BAR. CLARISSA IS RIGHT BEHIND HER. THE CLUB IS CROWDED, THE NOISE DEAFENING AND ATMOSPHERE ELECTRIC. AND, IN AN EFFORT TO MAKE SPARKS FLY CLARISSA SIGNALS HER CHOICE OF LIQUID TO EMILY: SHE DRAWS A HALF SUN IN THE AIR WITH HER FOREFINGER. EMILY TURNS TO THE BARMAN.

EMILY

. . . and a Tequila Sunrise thanks.

THE BARMAN PREPARES A TEQUILA SUNRISE. CLARISSA SCANS THE CLUB GROUND. SO DO WE. AS USUAL THERE EXISTS A STAGE, A DANCE FLOOR, A BAR AND AN ELEVATED EATING AREA. UNLIKE THE LAST CLUB THERE ARE MORE FEMALES THAN MALES HERE. THE LIGHTING IS DIM AND STROBES DOT AND DASH THE SKY CONTINUALLY LIKE EXCLAMATION POINTS THAT CAN'T BE IGNORED. THE CONTAGION OF EXCITEMENT DEFINITELY FILLS THE AIR.

CLARISSA

Yeah! I'm loving this place!

EMILY TAKES THE TWO DRINKS FROM THE BAR. SHE HANDS ONE TO CLARISSA.

EMILY

Introductions!

THE TWO MAKE THEIR WAY TOWARD THE CLOSEST TABLE.

CLARISSA

What?

EMILY

Introductions. Let's say we're in the public eye, and we're the stars of a new reality TV show. How do you introduce yourself? What do you say to the camera? Or to me? And what do I say? And what do we wear? What do we drink?

CLARISSA

You said reality?

EMILY

Yeah.

CLARISSA

Then the answers are already in our hands, on our bodies, and jumping from our lips.

EMILY

But it's the first time I've had this drink. I don't know if it's my favorite yet, or even if I like it.

EMILY STARES AT THE GLASS. CLARISSA GLANCES AT HER WATCH.

CLARISSA

12 o'clock!

EMILY

He better be hot this time.

CLARISSA

Not a direction. It's 12 already. I got an early shift tomorrow.

EMILY

What time?

CLARISSA

9.

EMILY

Which gives us nine hours to drink, to wander over to the dance floor and to find a guy or two.

CLARISSA PICKS UP HER PHONE. SHE STARES AT THE SCREEN. SHE SMILES.

CLARISSA

Wanna go to New York?

EMILY

What?

CLARISSA READS ALOUD THE MESSAGE ON HER PHONE.

CLARISSA

Hi, my little angel. Just letting you know that I'll be in New York for the next three days. The flights are on me if you and Emily would like to visit. I miss you very much. We can spend some time together in between my speeches. I'll be speaking about . . .

CLARISSA TURNS THE PHONE OVER. SHE REMOVES THE BACK COVER.

EMILY

Is the battery flat?

CLARISSA REMOVES THE BATTERY AND THEN THE SIM CARD. SHE PUTS THE SIM CARD IN HER POCKET.

EMILY

Clarissa?

CLARISSA PLACES THE BATTERY BACK INTO THE PHONE, THEN CLIPS THE COVER INTO PLACE LIKE THE SMALL GADGET IS SOME KIND OF IKEA BMW FRESH OFF THE PRODUCTION LINE.

CLARISSA

Oh no. I seem to have lost my phone.

CLARISSA TOSSES THE PHONE ONTO AN EMPTY TABLE SEVERAL METRES AWAY.

EMILY

Clarissa; how'd the message end? New York would be great but aren't you meant be going back to University of Utah soon?

CLARISSA

Speech on foreign affairs. I don't know if I really wanna go. It's up to you Emily. Tell you what; if we wanna prepare for this imaginary reality show you were talking about then we'll have to sample everything from the bar - so we know our favorite drinks.

CLARISSA DOWNS HER TEQUILA SUNRISE.

EMILY

Ha. Clarissa!

CLARISSA STANDS UP. SHE PLACES A HAND ON EMILY'S SHOULDER.

Come on Em; let's purchase some more poison.

EMILY

Your call.

EMILY DOWNS HER DRINK AND STANDS UP ALSO.

EMILY

Does this mean we're not sleeping tonight?

CLARISSA

You bet.

THEY RETURN TO THE BAR.

******

My Culture – 1 Giant Leap, Maxi Jazz, and Robbie Williams (http://www.dailymotion.com/.../xbzb7_1-giant-leap-my...)

My Culture – 1 Giant Leap, Maxi Jazz, and Robbie Williams (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J05X-vtB_X4)

We Are All Made Of Stars – Moby (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xAh6fk0KD1c&ob=av3e)

******

INT. NIGHTCLUB - LATER NIGHT

(CLARISSA, EMILY, CITIZEN 1, CITIZEN 2)

CLARISSA IS TIPSY. SHE TILTS HER HEAD TO THE LEFT AND WE SEE THE CLUB SCENE STUMBLE. IT ALMOST TRIPS.

CLARISSA

Emily - I don't don't like straight tequila. I don't like it because it makes my head tilt and I don't mind my head tilting but only when I tell it to . . . I don't want these slimy tequila tics in my head tellin' it how to hang.

EMILY

And I don't like vodka vermin.

CLARISSA

I don't like spin. I get dizzy.

EMILY

I'm gonna spin like a politician. Wanna dance?

CLARISSA

Girl . . . you . . . cannot even . . . stand and I'm so . . . off my head I'll be dancing like a poli . . .

EMILY

Like Boris Yeltsin.

CITIZEN 1

Yeah, so we just gonna sit back and watch as they fly more planes into our buildings?! Look son, that plane hit the Empire State dead on! What a shot. Which tower do you think they'll sink next?

THE CAMERA PANS TO THE BAR AND CAPTURES TWO MEN, HEAVILY INTOXICATED.

CITIZEN 2

No no no! Why don't we fuckin' sit back and watch countries get bombed!? Look son, it's bye bye Iraq! Bye bye Afghanistan!

CITIZEN 1

Oh ok! So we let them all in!? Fuckin' open country! Bring all your n**** friends and t****heads and we'll all drink cocktails as we plan the next attack! Fuck it, we already got ourselves a n**** president!

CITIZEN 2

Obama's more American than you'll ever be, you fuckin' f*****! He's bringin' our troops back home, instead of leaving 'em there to rot.

THE FIRST GUY STANDS. HE KICKS HIS STOOL TO THE GROUND.

CITIZEN 1

Don't you ever tell me I'm not American! I'm born and bred Texan. My parents are from Texas, my grandparents, their parents, their parents. Where the fuck are you from you fuckin' ape!?

THE SECOND MAN STANDS.

CITIZEN 2

From right here in Utah for your information. And my son is in Afghanistan right now fighting for our beautiful country. And I'll exclude you from that our if you don't mind.

CITIZEN 1

Oh I very much mind!

THE FIRST GUY PICKS UP A BOTTLE. HE CRACKS IT ON THE BAR. HE POINTS IT AT THE SECOND GUY.

CLARISSA

Em, tell the DJ I want Everybody (Backstreet's Back)!

EMILY

Clarissa! What are you doing?

CLARISSA

You know.

CLARISSA WINKS. THE CAMERA'S SO SHY IT DOESN'T KNOW WHERE TO LOOK. A SECURITY GUARD RUNS TOWARD THE MAN WITH THE BOTTLE. CLARISSA HOPS ONTO THE STAGE. EMILY RUSHES OVER TO THE DJ. THE SECOND MAN TAKES TWO OR THREE STEPS BACK. THE CAMERA'S SPINNING BUT WHEN IT COMES TO A STOP ITS GAZE IS ON CLARISSA AND CLARISSA'S ON STAGE NEXT TO A POLE.

A GUY HANDS CLARISSA A MICROPHONE. AND ALREADY SOME CURIOUS HEADS ARE TURNING. THE MUSIC STARTS. CLARISSA SINGS, WRAPS HER LEGS AROUND THE POLE, AND THEN PLANTS THEM BACK ON THE GROUND LIKE THEY'RE ELASTIC BANDS.

CLARISSA WINKS - THIS TIME AT THE AUDIENCE. SHE BEGINS TO SING THE BACKSTREET BOYS' EVERYBODY (BACKSTREET'S BACK) REPLACING ANY PLURAL PRONOUNS WITH SINGULAR I'S, HIGHLIGHTING HERSELF, HER DANCING, HER SINGING, HER BODY. CHATTER BUILDS UP; EXCITED CHATTER. IMMEDIATELY THE MAN DROPS THE BOTTLE. HE RAISES HIS HANDS. AND EVEN THOUGH WE CAN'T HEAR HIM WE CAN TELL HE'S PLEADING WITH SECURITY TO LET HIM STAY. SECONDS LATER HE AND THE SECOND GUY ARE SHAKING HANDS, PATTING EACH OTHER ON THE BACK, AND DOING EVERYTHING SHORT OF KISSING. CLARISSA HOPS OFF THE STAGE BUT CONTINUES TO SING. SHE STROLLS ELOQUENTLY THROUGH THE CROWD, HIDING HER DRUNKENNESS WELL BEHIND THIS VEIL OF SMOOTH STROLLING AND SINGING.

THE CROWD CHEERS.

THE CAMERA FINDS EMILY AND SITS ON HER TABLE, STARING AT HER BEAUTIFUL FACE AND WAITING FOR HER TO SAY SOMETHING. YOU COULD MISTAKE THE SOUND OF CLAPPING FOR THE TAPPING OF THIS CAMERAS FIGURATIVE FEET.

EMILY

This is why we need a female president.

******

Mosh - Eminem (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ox0Q4YIdnGI)

Everybody (Backstreet's Back) - Backstreet Boys (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6M6samPEMpM)

It's Goin' Down – X-Ecutioners, Mike Shinoda, and Mr. Hahn (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PcRKsu5H97E)

Sherman, J. (2011). Zoom. Psychology Today, 44 (2), 52-53.

Bartz, A. (2011). The I's have it. Psychology Today, 44 (4), 11.

McCarthy, L. [Writer], Shilton, G. M. [Director], Priestley, J. [Actor], & Novick, J. [Actress] (1996, November 6). The Things We Do for Love: Beverly Hills, 90210. [Television series]. Los Angeles, California: Fox Broadcasting Company. [Liberal/Conservative].

******

EXT. UTAHN STREETS - NIGHT

CLARISSA IS ON THE PHONE - EMILY'S - TO HER BOSS AT LONE STAR. EMILY WALKS ALONGSIDE HER. THE STREETS ARE A LITTLE LESS CROWDED THAN EARLIER IN THE NIGHT.

CLARISSA

Yeah, I know it's 4 in the morning but your phone was on and you answered and it's me so I know your happy. . . . Yeah. Plus I'm a little wasted so I'm being silly. But look - something has suddenly come up and I need to go to NY for a few days. I wanted to give you five hours notice before my next shift. . . . Really? That's cool? Thanks so much Clare. It won't be too busy anyway, ay? . . . Yeah. Goodnight.

EMILY

I can't believe you rang your boss! At this time of night. What did she say?

CLARISSA

I'm fired.

EMILY

What!?

CLARISSA

Just kidding. It's all good. Everyone in the kitchen is oddly happy lately. Could be because I hide my paycheck in various unusual places. Everyone seems to keep finding money in the strangest of spots. I'll admit that putting a fifty in the oven may not have been a smart idea. Now it's practically the size of a 50 cent coin. I could just put it all in the tip jar but then people will know it's me.

EMILY LAUGHS.

EMILY

How much have you hidden? Wait . . . Wouldn't the fifty have caught fire?

CLARISSA

Oh yeah . . . it was an Australian fifty. I've hidden hundreds of dollars . . . mostly American.

EMILY

Girl, you are so crazy.

CLARISSA

But that's why you love me.

EMILY

Yep. So we're off to New York. You serious? How soon?

CLARISSA

Soon as. Maybe today. Say . . . 10. How's that? You gotta pick your pocket.

EMILY

Huh?

CLARISSA

Pick what you wanna put in your pocket. See . . .

CLARISSA TAKES A SILVER CARD OUT OF HER POCKET.

CLARISSA

Here's my Globe card [1.]. Got almost 10 grand on it. I think that's the limit. It's all we need. And our passports and whatever else we can fit into our pockets.

EMILY

I need perfume . . . and . . . um . . . make-up . . . that's all, I think.

CLARISSA

I just need a phone with internet. Yours'll do . . . until I find a better one in NY. Are there any stores still open now?

EMILY

I . . .

EMILY LOOKS AROUND

EMILY

. . . don't know.

THE CAMERA GOES LOOKING FOR AN OPEN STORE. IT SCAMPERS ALONG THE FOOTPATH, PEERING INTO WINDOWS ONE BY ONE.

CLARISSA

A 24/7! Let's go.

THEY WALK TOWARD A STORE . . . THE NAME STILL A BLUR . . .

******

I Ain't Thru – Keyshia Cole and Nicki Minaj (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jdLAvOMHpqo)

Miami To Ibiza – Swedish House Mafia and Tinie Tempah (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LCH1AsUydSc)

Cash Passport Globe (http://www.cashpassport.com/1/en/Globe/FAQ/)

******

OPTIONAL SCENE

EXT. UTAHN STREETS - NIGHT

EMILY AND CLARISSA SPIN AROUND BEFORE THEY REACH THE STORE, AND THEN PRESS THEIR BACKS AGAINST A NAKED WALL. CLARISSA BENDS ONE LEG, PRESSES HER FOOT TO THE WALL AND WAITS LIKE A SEAGULL FOR EMILY TO PULL A FEW BRIGHT PINK PILLS [1.] [2.] FROM HER POCKET.

CLARISSA

Sweet.

EMILY GIGGLES. SHE HANDS CLARISSA THE PILLS. CLARISSA TOSSES THEM INTO HER MOUTH.

EMILY

One girl. One.

CLARISSA POKES OUT HER TONGUE. TWO PINK PILLS DOT THE RED MUSCLES; SMALL BRIGHT PINK POLKA DOTS. EMILY SMILES, AND RETRIEVES ONE WITH A NEAT LICK, A FINE BRUSH STROKE. THEY EACH SWALLOW. THE CAMERA APPEARS TO SHRUG, THEN GLANCES ONCE MORE AT THE STOREFRONT. STILL THE NAME IS A BLUR.

THEY WALK INSIDE.

******

Bartz, A. (2011). Bitter pills. Psychology Today, 44 (2), 17.

Srivastava, R. K., & More, A. T. (2010). [Abstract]. Some aesthetic considerations for over the-counter (OTC) pharmaceutical products. International Journal of Biotechnology, 11 (3), 267-283. Retrieved January 10, 2012 from http://inderscience.metapress.com/content/14417k1234k5v811/

Smith, S. [Director], Rehem, S. [Director], Elsley, B. [Creator], & Brittain, J. [Creator] (2011). Skins: North America. 172 Drury lane, London: Company Television Limited.

 Pillmatic – Gym Class Heroes (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W2L6RrwuOV4)

OR

Bartz, A. (2011). Wising up to dummy pills. Psychology Today, 44 (2), 39.

Kaptchuk, T. J., Friedlander, E., Kelley, J. M., Sanchez, M. N., Kokkotou1, E., Singer, J. P., Kowalczykowski1, M., Miller, F. G., Kirsch, I., & Lembo1, A. J. (2010). [Background; Conclusion]. Placebos without Deception: A Randomized Controlled Trial in Irritable Bowel Syndrome. PLoS ONE, 5(12), e15591. doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0015591 Retrieved January 10, 2012 from http://www.plosone.org/.../info%3Adoi%2F10.1371%2Fjournal...

******

INT. STORE - NIGHT

(CLARISSA, EMILY, MIKAYLA)

CLARISSA IS ON THE PHONE TO A BOYFRIEND. EMILY IS BROWSING.

CLARISSA

Tony, how are you? . . . I woke you? You mean you ain't partying? C'mon dude. . . . Well, we're heading to NY to trace dad's campaign trail and - like - we'll be needing a guy to fuck if we get bored [1.] [2.]. . . . Yes, all expenses paid. You in? . . . Where are you now? . . . New Jersey. That's easy. Could you meet us at JFK midday? . . . Sweet. Oh - get some sleep, yeah? . . . Love you. So does Em.

EMILY

I'm ditchin' him if we find someone hotter.

THE STORE OWNER APPROACHES THE GIRLS FROM BEHIND, SMILING.

MIKAYLA

Ladies, could I please see some ID?

CLARISSA

What? But this is a clothes store. You don't spray the garments with alcohol do you?

MIKAYLA

Trust me, you'll wanna show me your ID . . . if you are who I think you are.

CLARISSA

I don't like to show my ID to strangers unless it's absolutely necessary. We just need some new clothes.

EMILY

Who is it you think she is?

MIKAYLA

Are you a daughter of Jon Huntsman?

EMILY SHRUGS.

EMILY

Looks like your cover's blown, Clarissa.

CLARISSA PULLS HER ID FROM A POCKET. SHE FLASHES IT AT MIKAYLA.

MIKAYLA EXTENDS A HAND.

MIKAYLA

My name's Mikayla.

CLARISSA SHAKES HER HAND, SO DOES EMILY. THEN CLARISSA SWEEPS HER GAZE ACROSS THE STORE.

MIKAYLA

Don't worry, we're alone.

CLARISSA

I'm Clarissa. This is my friend Emily. You know my dad?

MIKAYLA

I'm helping fund his campaign [3.] [4.]. We all are - the staff. He's asked us to look out for you girls. Follow me. I have some things to show you.

MIKAYLA LEADS THE WAY DOWN SOME STAIRS INTO SOME KIND OF BASEMENT.

CLARISSA STOPS, BARELY HALFWAY DOWN.

CLARISSA

Wait a second. Your turn to show us some ID. My dad would have given you his campaign card. Probably a gold one too.

MIKAYLA

Oh. So sorry. Here . . .

MIKAYLA PULLS A GOLD CARD FROM HER POCKET AND SHOWS IT TO THE GIRLS.

CLARISSA

Thanks.

THEY ALL CONTINUE DOWN THE STAIRS.

MIKAYLA

You girls are heading to New York, huh?

CLARISSA

That's right.

MIKAYLA

When are you leaving?

CLARISSA

We don't plan. We just arrive at the airport and get the next flight. We could get a private plane if we wanted but I don't think we need it yet . . . so long as people like you don't go telling everyone who we are. Ha ha.

MIKAYLA

No no. Certainly not. We respect your privacy.

CLARISSA

Thanks.

MIKAYLA

You girls are gonna love this. These bras are state-of-the-art and totally stunning. They're part of an opera wardrobe. 100 per cent water soluble [5.]. They look like butterfly wings.

MIKAYLA LIFTS A SMALL BRA FROM A BENCH.

CLARISSA

Wow! That's beautiful. Can I . . .?

MIKAYLA

Go ahead. Be careful though. They're so delicate - like fabric glass.

CLARISSA

Fabric diamond. Wow - this feels good.

MIKAYLA

You won't find these on display upstairs - or in any store for that matter. They cost us way too much. And if just one person gets their sweaty palms on them . . . yours are clean, right?

CLARISSA

The bra's still visible so I'm guessing my palms aren't too bad. I love how thin this is.

CLARISSA LETS HER HANDS DRIFT FROM THE UNDERSIDE OF THE BRA AND CAPTURES IT AS IT SETTLES AGAIN ON HER PALMS.

CLARISSA

Feather thin. And what's that say . . .?

MIKAYLA

Oh - that's just our store's logo . . .

CLARISSA

Oh, I see . . .

EMILY

But if it dissolves in water then you won't be showing it off for long . . .

I NOD.

CLARISSA

And can I fold this? . . . maybe place it in a waterproof, resealable plastic bag that I can fit in my pocket . . .?

MIKAYLA

A small plastic cylinder. You can roll it up and place it in one, like it's a poster.

CLARISSA

And I'm a poster girl. I'll take it. One for Emily also.

EMILY

Clarissa! Are you sure?

CLARISSA

Trust me.

MIKAYLA

Take photos, girls. Maybe we'll get some posters made up for the store. Now, another thing. You need perfume, right?

MIKAYLA WALKS OVER TO A CUPBOARD. ON IT SIT AROUND TWENTY SMALL GLASS BOTTLES.

MIKAYLA

Heard of oestradiol [6.] [7.]? That's the active ingredient in this perfume. Scientifically proven to enhance the attractiveness of your smell. Of course, all you really need to do is mention your name and guys are all over you . . .

CLARISSA

Well, yeah. We're actually not looking for perfume right now. But I'm loving the bras. Do you have anything else made out of this material?

MIKAYLA

No. Unfortunately not.

CLARISSA

That's cool. I'll be sure to drop in again next time I'm here. We'll just take the two bras.

MIKAYLA

Certainly. I won't waste your time then. Right back up the stairs, girls.

CLARISSA AND EMILY MAKE THEIR WAY BACK TO THE GROUND FLOOR.

EMILY

Bras that dissolve in water?

CLARISSA

Yeah! Do you see the potential?

MIKAYLA

Here are the cylinders they were delivered to us in.

MIKAYLA HANDS BOTH CLARISSA AND EMILY A PLASTIC CYLINDER. SHE WALKS OVER TO THE CASHIER.

MIKAYLA

That's $200. Will that be cash or credit?

CLARISSA

Neither. VISA.

CLARISSA PASSES MIKAYLA HER GLOBE CARD.

CLARISSA

Don't you know anything about how people like myself carry cash?

MIKAYLA

Now I do. Nice card. Sign here please.

MIKAYLA SLIDES A SLIP OF PAPER TOWARD CLARISSA.

CLARISSA

I prefer to type in my pin.

MIKAYLA

Certainly. Yep.

CLARISSA TYPES IN THE FOUR DIGIT PIN AND THEN NODS. THE RECEIPT PRINTS AND MIKAYLA PASSES IT TO CLARISSA.

MIKAYLA

Enjoy the trip girls. Say hi to your dad for me, Clarissa.

CLARISSA

You bet. All the best.

THE GIRLS LEAVE THE STORE.

******

Hooper, R. (2011). They have friends with benefits... New Scientist, 212 (2842), 6-7.

Gomes, C. M., & Boesch, C. (2011). [Abstract]. Reciprocity and trades in wild West African chimpanzees. Behavioral Ecology and Sociobiology, 65 (11), 2183-2196. doi: 10.1007/s00265-011-1227-x Retrieved January 10, 2011 from http://www.springerlink.com/content/b571247151351141/

Martinez-Carter, K. (2011). In the Red, White, and Blue: Political involvement boosts bottom lines. Psychology Today, 44 (2), 12.

Lux, S., Crook, T. R., & Woehr, D. J. (2011). [Abstract]. Mixing Business With Politics: A Meta-Analysis of the Antecedents and Outcomes of Corporate Political Activity. Journal of Management, 37 (1), 223-247. doi: 10.1177/0149206310392233 Retrieved January 10, 2012 from http://jom.sagepub.com/content/37/1/223.short

Storey, H. [Artist], & O'Callaghan, T. [Writer] (2011). Fashioning the future. New Scientist, 212 (2842), 50-51.

Hamzelou, J. (2011). The wax and wane of the sexual brain. New Scientist, 212 (2842), 12.

Christensen, A., Dewing, P., & Micevych, P. (2011). [Abstract: Complicated, but essentially this just highlights the importance of oestradiol/estradiol]. Membrane-Initiated Estradiol Signaling Induces Spinogenesis Required for Female Sexual Receptivity. The Journal of Neuroscience, 31 (48), 17583-17589. doi: 10.1523/JNEUROSCI.3030-11.2011. Retrieved January 10, 2011 from http://www.jneurosci.org/content/31/48/17583.short

I'm On – Trae The Truth, MDMA, Lupe Fiasco, Big Boi, Wale, and Wiz Khalifa (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qX8erLf0jTM&feature=g-logo...) [I used to have dark nights now it’s bright lights/Daytime bus pass, now it’s night flights/Had a poor man swag now it’s priced right/Always wanted a piece of the pie, now it’s sliced right - Trae The Truth].

Whenever, Wherever – Shakira (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=weRHyjj34ZE&ob=av3e)

You Need Me, I Don't Need You – Ed Sheeran, Wretch 32, and Devlin (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZXvzzTICvJs&feature=relmfu)

******

OPTIONAL SCENE

EXT. UTAHN STREETS - NIGHT

(CLARISSA, EMILY, MIKAYLA, GUARD)

CLARISSA PULLS A BRA – A NORMAL ONE, ALL SCREWED UP, LOOKING LIKE A SCRUNCHY – FROM HER LEFT POCKET. SHE NUDGES EMILY.

CLARISSA

Whoa! I am sooooo out of it . . . this swam into my pocket like it's liquid or something . . .

EMILY

Liquid doesn't swim, silly. You mean; like it's a squid.

CLARISSA

How much does squid cost?

EMILY

I . . . don't know.

MIKAYLA

Oi! You girls! Get back here now! Security! She stole a bra!

GUARD

Ladies! Stop right there.

CLARISSA NODS TO EMILY.

CLARISSA

Run!

THEY EACH TAKE OFF DOWN THE BUSY STREET, DARTING IN BETWEEN PEOPLE. AFTER TEN OR TWENTY STRIDES THEY'RE WELL CLEAR OF THE GUARD: A BRA COULDN'T BE WORTH MUCH MORE THAN A FEW METRES OF GROUND . . . ESPECIALLY FOR A FAT GUARD. AFTER ALL, IT'S ONLY A FOOT LONG.

CLARISSA STARTS TO LAUGH. SO DOES EMILY.

CLARISSA

Why did I just steal a bra?

EMILY

Beats me.

CLARISSA

Damn pink pills.

******

Keep It On A Low – Dot Rotten (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0FBoBYWm-zk&feature=relmfu)

Make The World Go Round – Nas, Chris Brown, The Game (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u2de0RBcqiE&feature=related)

Dance With Me Tonight – Olly Murs (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F3EG4olrFjY&feature=related)

******

EXT. STATE STREET - NIGHT

(CLARISSA, EMILY)

CLARISSA AND EMILY ARE WALKING DOWN STATE STREET IN SALT LAKE CITY. CLARISSA HAS A JOINT IN HER HAND. SHE PASSES IT TO EMILY.

EMILY

City Cab, UTE Cab, or Yellow Cab [1.]?

EMILY PLACES THE JOINT BETWEEN HER LIPS.

CLARISSA

And spend the next half hour with a strange male cab driver? I don't think so. Bus stop's right here. We'll get the 453 [2.].

EMILY BLOWS SOME HASH HOLES INTO THE AIR. SHE PUTS HER PHONE AWAY AND WALKS SLOWLY TOWARD THE BUS STOP SIGN LIKE IT'S SOME KIND OF FLAG POLE LEFT BEHIND BY MEMBERS OF A STRANGE, FOREIGN NATION.

EMILY

Will they let us on? We're as high as where we're headed.

CLARISSA TAPS A SMALL SHEET OF PAPER THAT'S STRAPPED TO THE POLE WITH STICKY TAPE.

CLARISSA

They better. The next one's in five minutes at 5:51 and if we miss that we gotta wait until the pm . . . if we don't move . . . but we'll move. All we gotta do is follow Temple Street to the airport. We ain't too many squares away. This city's as gridded as NY.

EMILY

But your silly small mind can't comprehend the scale. Remember when you said it would take half an hour tops to walk down Manhattan, last time we were there? You said it was just a small grid. It's one of the largest cities in the world!

CLARISSA TWIRLS AROUND THE POLE [3.].

CLARISSA

Sometimes I like to square dance. Never know who you might meet. But since it's night we're soooo getting the bus. Probably a whole heap of international students from UU rushin' to the airport.

EMILY

You're just gonna try and chat to random people aren't you? [4.]

CLARISSA

Watch me. Hide the weed! The bus is coming.

WE HEAR THE BUS. WE SEE EMILY HASTILY TOSS THE JOINT AND THEN PUSH THE REMAINING WEED DEEPER INTO HER POCKET. THE BUS ROLLS UP THE ROAD LIKE A FINGERS ROLL UP SOME DOPE IN A PAPER NOTE - SMOOTHLY SO AS NOT TO TEAR A HOLE IN THE BLISSFUL NIGHT. THE SCENE ROLLS UP ALSO.

******

Cabs in Utah; City Cab – 801-363-5550; UTE Cab – 801-359-7788; Yellow Cab – 801-521-2100

Buses in Utah: Utah Transit Authority - 801-287-4636 (http://www.utabus.com/) Route 453 (http://www.rideuta.com/ridinguta/routes/schedule.aspx...) [5:51am bus from 600 South and State Street. Arrives at airport at 6:17am].

Whelpley, J. [Writer], Brinckerhoff, B. [Director], & Kendall, K. [Actress] (1996, September 4). A Mate for Life: Beverly Hills, 90210. [Television series]. Los Angeles, California: Fox Broadcasting Company. [Exotic dancer].

Selby, E. A. (2011). [Breaking free]. The help that harms. Psychology Today, 44 (5), 57-58.

Let's Roll - Yelawolf and Kid Rock (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WjF4eOnjCLE&ob=av2e)

Young, Wild and Free - Snoop Dogg, Wiz Khalifa, and Bruno Mars (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wa5B22KAkEk)

Single - Yo Gotti (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sReikbwRZDo)

******

EXT. BUS 453 [2.] - NIGHT

(CLARISSA, EMILY, BUS DRIVER, ROBYN, BUS GIRL, BUS GUY)

CLARISSA SMILES AT THE BUS DRIVER.

CLARISSA

Hi. Could we please have two singles to go to the airport?

EMILY

Preferably young and handsome.

CLARISSA

Shut up Emily. Pay no attention to her, driver; she's high.

EMILY

Clarissa!

BUS DRIVER

That's $4.50, girls. And try not to light up on the bus. I wouldn't feel right kicking you two off the bus so early in the morning.

EMILY

All good. Her dad's a millionaire. We'd just get a cab.

CLARISSA

Emily!

CLARISSA HANDS THE DRIVER A TWENTY.

BUS DRIVER

Do you have anything smaller?

CLARISSA PATS THE GUY ON THE SHOULDER AND RIPS THE TICKETS FROM THE MACHINE.

CLARISSA

Keep the change buddy.

CLARISSA AND EMILY WALK DOWN THE AISLE.

BUS DRIVER

Fair enough. But no gettin' trippy on the trip.

CLARISSA

Hear that Em?

EMILY

Yes.

EMILY STICKS HER TONGUE OUT AT CLARISSA.

THE CAMERA SCANS THE SEATS. THE BUS IS RATHER FULL FOR FIVE IN THE MORNING, ALBEIT WE'RE SEEING IN SIX. AND SEVERAL SEXY BODIES SIT UP BACK.

CLARISSA

Hey people! Anyone heading to NY? JFK? We're with the NYPD. We're on the hunt for a suspected drug trafficker.

BUS DRIVER

They're two intoxicated Utah teens. Don't listen to them . . . unless you're as bored as I am.

A YOUNG GIRL IN THE BACK SEAT PUTS UP HER HAND.

ROBYN

I am Sweden returning. But first New York.

CLARISSA

Brilliant.

CLARISSA AND EMILY TAKE A SEAT JUST IN FRONT OF THE GIRL.

CLARISSA

What's your name?

ROBYN

Robyn.

CLARISSA

Hi Robyn. I'm Clarissa. This is Emily. Were you studying at the University of Utah?

ROBYN

Yar. Exchange. Physics.

CLARISSA

No way. That's cool. I'm doing Psych. Did you like it?

ROBYN

Very nice experience. I do not want to go.

EMILY

Aww. Doesn't matter. You'll love New York. Have you been there before?

ROBYN

No. I can't wait.

EMILY

What plane are you getting?

ROBYN REMOVES A TICKET FROM HER HELLO KITTY [3.] KNAPSACK.

ROBYN

Um . . . US 12 [1.]. Leaves at 5 past 7 [1.].

CLARISSA

Nice. Sounds great. We're getting that too. You wouldn't have the number for the airport would you?

ROBYN

No . . . sorry.

EMILY

Try 8015752945. It's the liaison officer. Should be well connected, right?

EMILY TOSSES CLARISSA THE PHONE.

CLARISSA DIALS THE DIGITS, SMILES AND FIDGETS WITH THE CELL 'TIL IT'S FIGURATIVELY SEALED TO HER EAR, LIKE SHE'S JUST SOLD SOMETHING SPECIAL. SHE RAISES HER BROWS AT EMILY AND THEN BEGINS TO SPEAK.

CLARISSA

Hello, how are you? . . . I'm excellent. Thanks. Just wondering if I could talk to someone about booking a flight? Sorry, couldn't find the right number. . . . Yep . . . Hi. . . . I'm so good. Thanks. I was wondering if I could get 2 seats on the US 12 flight [1.] that departs for JFK at 5 past 7? . . . Oh, that's fine, I'll pay double. That's four times coz I'm getting two tickets. The name's Clarissa Huntsman by the way. My daddy's expecting me in New York to watch him give a speech. He'll be pleased to see me when I get there. Still need to tell him what plane I'm catching and how quickly I made the booking. Sorry, what was your name? . . . Katy. . . . That's excellent. Thank you. . . . I'd rather not give out my VISA number over the phone, is it ok if I pay on arrival? I should be there in about 15 minutes. . . . Thank you. Can I ask for Katy? . . . Fantastic. See you soon.

CLARISSA TOSSES THE PHONE BACK TO EMILY.

EMILY

You got tickets?

CLARISSA

We got tickets. Too easy.

ROBYN

You two will be on same flight? That is nice.

CLARISSA

That's right. And we'll be your Lonely Planet [5.] guide the whole ride and flight if you like.

EMILY

Yeah. We looove New York. Anything you wanna know we can tell you. We're pretty V.I.P. in the city.

CLARISSA

We're V.I.P. whenever and wherever we wanna be. But yeah - we well know NY.

EMILY

What's your perfume Robyn? It's beautiful, like musky fruit. Is it from Sweden?

CLARISSA

Ha ha. I'm picturing a pretty pink fruit salad now . . . and cherry lips, lots of lips.

ROBYN

No. It is not from Sweden. But it is popular there. It is Hello Kitty Eau de Parfum spray [4.].

ROBYN HOLDS UP THE BOTTLE. IT'S TINY; TRAVEL SIZE, LIKE A POCKET PEN WITH PLEASANT-SMELLING INK.

CLARISSA

It's tiny!

CLARISSA TILTS HER HEAD TO ONE SIDE.

CLARISSA

Robyn?

ROBYN

Yar.

CLARISSA

Can we copy you again?

EMILY

How much would you like for the perfume?

CLARISSA

Emily! Thanks a lot. Now I feel like Gwen Stefani exploiting a poor Harajuku Girl. What she means to ask, Robyn, is: "are you planning on doing some shopping at JFK or Salt Lake City airport? Will you be able to pick up some more perfume there?

ROBYN

No no. Too expensive. I don't have much to spend.

CLARISSA

Well . . .

CLARISSA PULLS A HUNDRED OUT OF HER SMALLER CHANGE JEANS POCKET. SHE TURNS TO EMILY.

CLARISSA

Forgot I had that there.

SHE TURNS BACK TO ROBYN.

Would you like a hundred for your kitty for any Hello Kitty?

ROBYN LAUGHS. SHE HOLDS UP THE FRAGRANCE SHELL; THE BOTTLE.

ROBYN

This? But it is half empty.

CLARISSA HOLDS THE HUNDRED BETWEEN HER FORE- AND MIDDLE FINGERS.

CLARISSA

Half full.

ROBYN

Ah . . . yeah. Thank you.

THE EXCHANGE TAKES PLACE AND CLARISSA'S AS HAPPY AS A FIEND WHO'S FOUND A FIX.

EMILY

Clarissa, you're such a . . .

CLARISSA

Kitty cat? I know.

CLARISSA TILTS HER HEAD BACK ALA CHRISTINA AGUILERA. SHE SPRAYS SOME KITTY ON THE NAPE OF HER NECK.

THE CAMERA CRAWLS SILENTLY ALONG THE WINDOW PANES OF THE BUS AND EVENTUALLY SETS ITS SIGHT ON A WOMAN APPROACHING A YOUNG MAN. HE HAS MORE LEGROOM THAN SHE DID.

BUS GIRL

Um . . . do you mind if I sit here? It's a little cramped where I was.

BUS GUY

No. Not at all. Be my guest. . . Um, sorry - that sounds silly.

THE GIRL SMILES AND SITS DOWN.

BUS GIRL

It doesn't sound silly. I'll be your guest. What's for dinner? Ha ha. I like your cologne by the way.

BUS GUY

Thanks. You smell nice too.

THE GIRL TOUCHES HER SHOULDER IN AN EFFORT TO BE FLIRTATIOUS WHILE SIMULTANEOUSLY ECLIPSING HER FINE FIGURE WITH HER ARM IN THE MANNER OF A SHY GIRL; SHE'S STILL A LITTLE SHY, A LITTLE NERVOUS.

BUS GIRL

But I have nothing on. I mean - I have clothes on. Obviously. Ha.

BUS GUY

Then it must be your natural scent. Beautiful girl like you, I ain't surprised. Are you English? Is that an English accent?

BUS GIRL

Oh, you're so sweet. Thank you. Yeah. Close. I'm from Swansea, in Wales. You're American, right?

BUS GUY

Salem, Oregon. But, funny - my cologne is actually London Playboy [6.].

BUS GIRL

Ha ha. Ok Hugh Grant. Oregon; is that near America?

BUS BOY

You're so cute. Oregon's a state, just under Washington. Top left.

THE GIRL LAUGHS.

BUS GIRL

Sorry. I'm so silly.

BUS GUY

No you're not. Many people haven't heard of it. It sounds like another country. Sounds a little Greek.

BUS GIRL

Sounds like pentagon. Oh . . .

THE GIRL TOUCHES THE GUY'S ARM.

BUS GIRL

is the Pentagon in Oregon? Sorry, I sometimes touch arms when I speak. Silly habit.

THE GUY SMILES.

BUS GUY

That's cool. No, the Pentagon's not in Oregon. I don't even know where it is. I've never been asked to visit. Ha ha.

THE CAMERA CRAWLS BACK TO THE PANE BESIDE THE TWO PROTAGONISTS.

CLARISSA

Emily! Oh my god! Front of bus. Those two just met. It'll be so sweet if they kiss.

EMILY

Oh. That's adorable.

THE CAMERA LOSES ITS FLY-LIKE GRIP ON THE WINDOW PANE AND FLIES AWAY FROM THE BUS. WE SEE FIRST THE BUS, THEN THE ROAD IT'S ON, AND FINALLY THE SALT LAKE CITY AIRPORT [1.] AND ALL ITS SURROUNDINGS FALL INTO VIEW AND PLACE LIKE PIECES FROM A JIGSAW PUZZLE OF A ROUTE.

******

Salt Lake City International Airport (http://www.slcairport.com/arrivals-and-departures.asp) [US 12 departing to New York JFK at 7:05am].

Buses in Utah: Utah Transit Authority - 801-287-4636 (http://www.utabus.com/) Route 453 (http://www.rideuta.com/ridinguta/routes/schedule.aspx...) [5:51am bus from 600 South and State Street. Arrives at airport at 6:17am].

Hello Kitty (http://www.sanrio.com/)

Hello Kitty Fragrance (http://www.sephora.com/browse/product.jhtml?id=P276338)

Lonely Planet (http://www.lonelyplanet.com/)

London Playboy (http://www.perfumereviews.org.uk/.../london-playboy.../)

Tilt Ya Head Back - Nelly and Christina Aguilera (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D9Yc3pv-uI0&ob=av3e)

Harajuku Girls - Gwen Stefani (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-HjCAvzeY-E)

Single - Yo Gotti (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sReikbwRZDo)

******

INT. SALT LAKE CITY - AIRPORT - DAY

(CLARISSA, EMILY, ROBYN, BUS GUY, BUS GIRL, BUS GUY'S GIRL, RUNNER)

CLARISSA, EMILY, AND EVERYONE ELSE HAVE ARRIVED AT THE AIRPORT. CLARISSA, EMILY AND ROBYN ARE GLANCING UP AT THE DEPARTURE TIMES. MEANWHILE, SEVERAL METRES AWAY, BUS GUY IS ABOUT TO MEET HIS GIRLFRIEND . . . AND HE HAS A FRIEND WITH HIM.

CLARISSA

We got just over half an hour. Robyn, you have luggage so you better hurry on ahead. We don't wanna hold you up. We'll see you on the plane. Anything you want from a store? It's on us.

ROBYN

Oh . . . thank you. Um . . . I don't know.

EMILY

Can we get you surprises? Please please please.

ROBYN

Yeah. Thank you so much. So, I must go.

CLARISSA

Terminal one. Follow the signs.

ROBYN

Yes. Bye.

ROBYN HURRIES OFF. HER BAGS ARE SMALL BUT CHECK-IN WILL STILL TAKE SOME TIME. CLARISSA PATS HER POCKETS.

CLARISSA

Ahhhhh; travelling light. Don't you love it? Passport, your phone, some Hello Kitty, and a soluble bra. We gotta get to terminal one in the next 15 minutes. That's our time limit. But first, we're finding the California Pizza Kitchen [1.]. Last time I was here, no anchovies; only artichokes and asparagus . . . but you never know. Maybe they've ordered some in . . .

EMILY

There's no way they'll be able to make a pizza for us in time.

CLARISSA

Then we get a pasta . . . or a salad. How long can it take?

CLARISSA TAKES EMILY'S PHONE OUT OF HER POCKET. SHE DIALS A NUMBER.

CLARISSA

8 0 1 5 7 5 2 6 2 7. C'mon; answer, answer . . . Hi there, how are you? We've just arrived at the airport and we have a flight at 5 past 7. I'm in a hurry. Could I order a pizza over the phone? . . . Do you have anything with anchovies [2.]? . . . Never mind, artichokes [2.] will do. I'll get that one with the artichoke sauce . . . Yeah, Roasted Artichoke and Spinach. How long will that take? . . . 10 minutes. Excellent. Thank you. See you soon.

CLARISSA PRESSES THE END-CALL BUTTON.

EMILY

You're pushing it. Concourse D is the totally opposite direction to terminal one.

CLARISSA

All good. Now - it's every girl for herself. If I miss the flight, I'll get the next one - you too. Just order the ticket online; you know my VISA number, right?

EMILY

Yeah, but . . .

CLARISSA

Sweet. But you'll be fine. We'll both make it. It's just fun to run by a time limit. How long?

EMILY

12 minutes.

CLARISSA

It's minus 12. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to retrieve some goods for Robyn. Look for the cutest things you can find. We'll meet at check-in, terminal one at 0.

EMILY

Minus 11 now.

CLARISSA

We go.

THEY BOTH NOD AND TURN TO FACE THE BULK OF THE BODY OF THIS SNAKE OF AN AIRPORT.

BUS GUY'S GIRL

Who is this?

CLARISSA AND EMILY STOP DEAD IN THEIR TRACKS. THEY TURN AROUND.

BUS GUY

I met her on the bus. She's so friendly. Her name's . . .

BUS GUY'S GIRL

I don't give a fuck what her name is! You just kissed her on the cheek . . . and you just met her?

BUS GIRL

Hang on! You have a girlfriend?

BUS GUY'S GIRL

Oh, he certainly does. Together two years, you slut!

BUS GIRL

Wait! I didn't know.

BUS GUY'S GIRL

Oh really; so this prick here failed to mention to you that he happens to be meeting his girlfriend at the airport.

BUS GUY

Please, . . .

BUS GUY'S GIRL

Don't you dare say my name you douche! You gonna play around? We're through. You and I; we're through.

BUS GUY

I love you.

BUS GUY'S GIRL

Wait! Who!? Who the fuck are you even talking to? I can't see where you're looking! Are you looking at her or me? You fuckin' piece of shit. You is fuckin' white trash; you know that!? Fuckin' white trash!

BUS GIRL

Yeah, dude. So much for the shy, sensitive Hugh Grant! You're a fuckin' sleaze! You know that? I'm outta here. Why don't you buy some more cologne so you come pick up some sluts on the flight? Fuck you!

BUS GUY'S GIRL

Bye. Have a lonely, miserable life.

THE TWO GIRLS WALK AWAY. THE GUY STANDS UP.

BUS GUY'S GIRL

Don't you dare follow us. It's over. Fuck off!

THE GUY SITS DOWN.

CLARISSA GLANCES AT EMILY.

CLARISSA

Change of plan. What are we at?

EMILY

Minus 9.

CLARISSA

Give me a fifty.

EMILY HANDS CLARISSA A FIFTY. SHE NODS AT A PASSING MAN.

CLARISSA

Hey mate, how are you? Look here's a fifty. I've ordered a pizza from California Pizza Kitchen. Do you know where that is?

RUNNER

Uh . . . yeah.

CLARISSA

I need you to run over there, retrieve the Artichoke and Spinach pizza and meet me at terminal one. If you do I'll give you another twenty. And you can keep all the change. Sound good?

RUNNER

Ok. Sure.

CLARISSA

In 8 minutes! Go.

HE RUNS OFF.

CLARISSA

Emily, get the stuff from the store. I'm taking to this guy, ok?

EMILY

Ok. See you at the terminal?

CLARISSA

Yep.

CLARISSA WANDERS OVER TO THE GUY FROM THE BUS. HE'S CRYING.

CLARISSA

Hi dude. I saw what happened.

THE GUY LOOKS UP.

BUS GUY

Uh . . . I was silly. They were both so nice . . .

CLARISSA PUTS A HAND ON HIS SHOULDER.

CLARISSA

You're only human. You got it bad. I heard some of the conversation you two sparked up on the bus. It was magical. I love those moments. Don't you?

THE GUY SMILES.

CLARISSA

What's your name?

BUS GUY

Stanley.

CLARISSA

What flight are you getting, Stan? Can I call you that?

BUS GUY

Yes. Sure. US 12. To JFK.

CLARISSA

Excellent. Me too. My name's Clarissa. You have to check-in, yeah?

THE GUY STANDS UP. CLARISSA RISES ALSO.

BUS GUY

Oh God! I forgot! Am I too late?

CLARISSA

We'll make it. Let's go. It's terminal one.

CLARISSA AND STANLEY RUSH OFF. THE CAMERA RUNS ALONGSIDE THEM, TRYING HARD TO STAY OUT OF THEIR WAY.

BUS GUY

Her ticket! I forgot to give it to her!

CLARISSA

Your girlfriend? Your ex?

BUS GUY

Yeah . . . but I don't really want to see her . . . I'm not chasing her . . .

CLARISSA

No. You're running with me. This is serendipity Stanley. You and I were meant to meet. And those two girls were meant to lose their seats on this flight because Emily - my friend - and I . . . we need them. God works in mysterious ways.

BUS GUY

Really? You haven't got tickets yet?

CLARISSA

We will. We're paying double.

BUS GUY

Thank you Clarissa. Wait - here's one . . .

HE HANDS CLARISSA HIS EX'S TICKET.

CLARISSA

Keep it for now. In case she turns up.

CLARISSA HOLDS STANLEY'S HAND.

CLARISSA

But if she doesn't then you're