Before Love Had a Name: Book 4: Before Love, #4

By Joyce DeBacco

In Book 4 of Before Love Had a Name, Robbie's life spins out of control. With no future on the island, she moves to Miami to be with Chris; Lee's friendship with Cam deepens, and he helps him buy the marina; Robbie gives birth; Chris breaks an important promise to Robbie; and tragedy strikes the family.

Disclaimer: Before Love Had a Name is presented in serial format with the story in each book continuing into the next one. Series is now complete at four books.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Joyce DeBacco
• Release date: Dec 25, 2020
• ISBN: 9781393786016

Book preview

CHAPTER ONE

Cam rushed through a shower, dressed, then hurried out, hair still wet. As he passed his brother’s room he noticed the door ajar. Chris usually kept it closed even when he was home. Reaching in to close it, he saw his suitcase on the bed, open and rummaged through but unpacked. Clothes lay in a heap on the floor, and the open drawer on the bedside stand was in danger of falling out.

Thinking it odd that a man who was normally a stickler for neatness would leave his room so, he entered, surprised to find the rest of the room in similar disarray. Shrugging, he started to close the drawer when, for reasons unclear to him, he scanned its contents. On top of papers and childhood memorabilia, a framed photo lay face down. Curious, he flipped it over, smiling at the faceless photo of a naked woman, her arms and legs tastefully arranged around a bed sheet. It reminded him of a photo one would admire in an art gallery. He was about to slip it back in the drawer when a tiny butterfly tucked in the fold of the woman’s thigh peeked up at him.

* * *

While Chris and his mother waited for Cam, they strolled around the property. Chatting idly, they admired the new shrubs planted to replace the ones Andrew demolished.

Oh, my, his mother said. These are growing so big I might have to call someone in to trim them back a bit. Not too much, just low enough to cover this monstrous piece of air conditioning equipment.

They made it halfway around the house when a crash sounded from inside.

Startled, his mother grabbed at his arm. Oh, my Lord! she exclaimed. What was that?

A sinking feeling settled in Chris’s gut. Shrugging out of his mother’s grasp, he rushed upstairs.

Cameron! she screamed. What was that noise? Are you all right?

In the hall outside his room, Chris paled at the sight of his brother holding his treasured photo, its shattered glass tinkling out of its frame.

Cam, he whispered.

Cam raised his gaze, his face a twisted mask. You and Robbie?

You—you weren’t supposed to see that, Chris mumbled.

You and Robbie!

It’s over now, Cam. She chose you.

Unappeased, Cam slammed the framed photo against the bedside stand, prompting another cry from his mother. Standing amidst shards of splintered glass, he ripped the photo from the frame and tore it up.

Chris watched silently as his treasured photo fluttered to the floor. He was still staring at it when Cam lunged at him.

Boys, no! their mother cried as they tumbled on the floor. Oh, my God! Wringing her hands, she screamed every time Cam rammed his fist in Chris’s face. Offering no defense, Chris took blow after blow until she managed to separate them.

Livid with rage, Cam shot to his feet.

Cameron, please! she screamed as he ran from the room. What’s going on? Talk to me. Please.

Failing to get a response, she turned to Chris lying motionless on the floor. Christian, what did you do to make him so angry?

Chris slowly and laboriously rolled to his hands and knees. Numb, he began isolating the torn pieces of photo from the glass shards. I slept with Robbie, he mumbled tonelessly.

What! Oh, Christian, how could you?

Sitting back on his heels, he thought about her question. How could I? I don’t know, Mom. Maybe I’m just as rotten as everyone always said I was.

She knelt beside him. That’s not true, honey. You might pick on your brother too much, but no one ever thought you were rotten. A bit brash, maybe, but never rotten.

Okay, Mom, he said dully. Brash but not rotten, gotcha. Now, if you don’t mind, I don’t feel much like dinner. Can you close the door on your way out?

Left to his misery, Chris finished picking out the torn pieces of Robbie’s body. Then he sat on the edge of the bed and opened his clenched hand, staring at the pieces for several seconds before dumping them in the trash basket beside the bed.

Lying back, he thought about his and Cam’s complicated relationship. Although they’d always been competitive, their relationship didn’t become contentious until both fell in love with Robbie. Nonetheless, he felt a deep, abiding love for his brother. Undeserving of the abuse heaped on him through the years, Cam truly was the good twin.

Then, though he’d promised Robbie he wouldn’t contact her once their ill-advised summer fling ended, he reached for his phone. She needed to know what happened.

But when he tried to call, she didn’t answer. Ten minutes later he tried again. Still, no answer. On the third try, she angrily answered.

Chris, I thought we agreed not to call each other, she snapped. Now stop calling me! That said, she immediately hung up.

For a brief instant, he considered complying with her demand. Then he remembered how enraged his brother was when he left.

He called again, and she shouted at him again. Chris, stop calling me!

Robbie, don’t hang up, he said in a shaky voice. I wouldn’t be calling if it wasn’t important.

Aware she hadn’t hung up yet, he said as calmly as he could, I need to know if you heard from Cam in the last half-hour.

No. And even if I did, why would I tell you? We had an agreement.

Because he knows, Robbie, he blurted out. He knows about last summer.

What? she whispered. How?

He found my photo of you.

What photo?

The one I said I deleted from my camera.

She gasped. Oh, my God, no! Chris, what did you do?

I had it printed and put in a frame. It was all I had left of you. It was in my drawer, and I never expected him to look in there. We might have pissed each other off a lot growing up, but we never violated each other’s privacy.

What did he say? She sobbed.

Not much.

Did you two fight?

He hesitated before answering. No. He just smashed the picture frame and ripped up the photo. We didn’t get in a fist fight. Not quite true, but close enough.

I did hear from him, she admitted. About ten minutes ago. He asked me to meet him out by the road. I thought he sounded strange, and I asked what was wrong. He said that’s what we had to talk about. She started to cry.

I’m sorry, Robbie. I’m so, so sorry.

Oh, Chris, sorry doesn’t cut it. If you’d deleted that picture like I asked you to, we wouldn’t be having this conversation. So don’t call me again; you’ve caused enough trouble. With that, she hung up.

With the phone still to his ear, Chris issued a long, weary exhalation of sorrow and regret. Then he stuffed his clothes back in his suitcase and slammed it shut.

Christian, where are you going? his mother said when he came out of his room.

I’m going back to Miami, Mom. I should never have come here. He gave her a quick kiss, then hurried out.

* * *

Robbie was waiting by the road when Cam drove up. He could tell by her grim expression that she knew she’d been found out.

They sat in silence for several minutes, each aware how their talk would end. Why, Robbie, why?

She hung her head. It just happened, Cam. I saw into his heart, and he’s not at all like he pretends to be. But we never meant to hurt you. That’s why when summer ended, we ended.

When did it start?

When you were off chasing turtles the summer before last.

His eyes widened. You’ve been cheating on me for two years?

No! It was only once that summer, when—when we went on a picnic.

The picnic you lied about, he said through clenched teeth.

She winced. Yes. I said Trish was there because I knew you’d be mad otherwise. And I was right. After you found out, you decided we should take a break. Then you conveniently got an internship at Mote.

He turned angry eyes on her. You knew I’d applied for that internship long before then, so don’t put that on me.

I knew you’d applied, yes, but I didn’t know you’d get accepted. When I realized you were going to be gone all summer, I decided to go see my mom so I wouldn’t be alone here with Chris only steps away. I didn’t know he’d follow me. But he was there for me when Georgie died and I needed a shoulder to cry on.

Do you love him?

She lowered her head. Yes. But it’s different from the way I love you. More importantly, it’s over now. I only want to be with you, Cam, like we always planned.

Tears welled up in his eyes, and he struggled to keep them contained. Yeah, well, that’s not going to happen now. I’d always be wondering when you were going to leave me for him.

Cam, please. I love you, she pleaded. We’ll get past this.

No! We won’t. Because I can’t be with someone who cheated on me, especially with my brother.

She reached for his hand, and he recoiled from her touch. It’s over, Robbie. Don’t make it harder than it already is. He fixed his gaze at a spot on the dashboard, his raw, red knuckles white as they gripped the steering wheel. Not until she ran from the car crying did he allow his own tears to fall. He’d loved her all his life, and he’d just turned her away.

Hoping to blot out his pain, he drove aimlessly around the island. Two hours later, as his gas gauge neared empty, he pulled into the marina’s parking lot and filled up. The porch light came on at the house, and Trish stepped outside.

Cam? I thought that was your car. What are you doing here so late?

He cleared his throat. I, uh, was just driving around when I noticed I was running on fumes. I’ll pay for the gas.

Don’t worry about it. Are you hungry? I was making myself a late-night snack.

What time is it?

Ten o’clock, she said, approaching. Her brows knit together. You haven’t had dinner yet, have you? Cam, what’s going on? Is something wrong?

I broke up with Robbie. Hearing it out loud made his heart ache even more, and he stepped back in the shadows to hide his brimming eyes.

What? she whispered. She took his arm. Okay, let’s go inside.

Thanks, but no. I don’t want to talk about it.

You don’t have to talk. I just want to make you something to eat. Come on.

What about your dad? I don’t want to intrude.

Don’t worry about him. He goes to bed early, and nothing short of an earthquake will wake him once he takes his pain meds.

Once inside, though he didn’t plan on talking about it, he found himself doing exactly that. I always thought we’d get married someday. I guess that’s not going to happen now.

You don’t know that, she said, setting sandwiches on a plate. You’re hurting now, but once you get over the hurt, you might get back together again.

Uh-uh. Not gonna happen. He took a bite of his sandwich, surprised he hadn’t felt any hunger until now.

How can you be so sure?

Because I can’t forgive what she did. He expected a follow-up question; when none came, he blurted out the awful truth. She cheated on me with my brother.

The girl’s eyes widened. She did what?

She slept with Chris. He had a naked photo of her in his bedside table.

What . . . ? How . . . ? She dropped her head in her hands. Oh, my God. She asked if I’d ever slept with him. And, dummy me, I stupidly gushed about what a great lover he is. Oh, Cam, I’m so sorry.

It’s not your fault. She probably already knew what he was like in bed when she asked.

His phone rang, and he glanced at it. It’s my mom. She was there when the whole mess went down.

Go ahead, take the call. She’s probably worried sick.

He took a deep breath before answering. Yeah, Mom, what is it?

Oh, Cameron, honey, are you all right? It’s late. Please come home.

I don’t want to see him again.

He’s not here, honey. He never even unpacked. He just—left. She started to cry.

Mom, don’t cry. Please.

I can’t sleep without knowing if you and your brother are all right. He won’t answer his phone, and for all I know he might be wrapped around a tree somewhere.

He’s all right, Mom. Guys like him always come out smelling like a rose. Look, I’m having something to eat right now. So go to bed; I’ll be home in a little while.

Promise?

Yeah, promise.

* * *

Chris dabbed at the blood seeping from his split lip, his fears centering around Robbie. Had his brother vented his rage on her the