My Fur, My Skin, My Scars

By Elisa

When they find a mysterious hatch, Vortex, Rin and Blue, merely acquaintances, are hurled into the middle of a war-torn world. With five others, they travel deep into every clan, learn its secrets and eventually go to war. However, while they hunt for these secrets in the shadows, they soon realize that there are more questions within the group than outside of it.
This isn’t the story of three clans driven apart by war. This is a story of eight people, what makes them similar and different, what brings them together and drives them apart and, ultimately, what keeps them alive.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Austin Macauley Publishers
• Release date: Jan 8, 2021
• ISBN: 9781528997935

Elisa

Elisa was born in Tirana, Albania, in 2007. In 2017, she moved to England. My Fur, My Skin, My Scars is her first book, which she finished writing in 2019.

Book preview

cover.

Prologue

Midnight Falls

A soft cry came out of his mouth as mist crept slyly out. The moon received his cries but did not echo them far enough. He had a pack once, and he left. He left because he didn’t fit in and he couldn’t stay there anymore. Although when night fell, he longed for their howls, every night his cries grew louder as he prayed for an answer, but no answer ever came. He longed for the warmth of his pack, but he felt cold. He longed for the times the pack hunted together, now he hunted alone. It was all these things that made him shun the world. He didn’t fit in, love wasn’t for him anymore. He tried to love but he couldn’t since that day, no, he was alone in the world, nothing could change that, right?

With these thoughts in his head he stumbled upon in the snow, trying to find an empty trunk to shelter himself for the night. Prey was scarce and shelter was vulnerable to the cold, yet he survived. He was agile, strong and independent and yet, there was an empty hole inside that no one could seem to fill.

As mist crept out slyly from his mouth, he snuggled to a corner and wrapped his tail around his legs, trying to find the seemingly impossible warmth he was craving, on this cold winter night. After rolling over several times, trying to find comfort on the harsh surface beneath him, his eyelids sealed shut as he fell into uncomfortable dreams.

He found himself standing in the middle of a wasteland, his padded, dark blue fur covering his silver, embedded star pattern; standing out like the stars in a cloudless night sky. A faint yet familiar voice filled his ears, calling out to him a different sentence every night. He didn’t understand all of them. Giving up is everyone’s favourite answer. It’s the easiest route, but also the worst, you can probably think of. With that, the dream ended and his eyes fluttered open. Vortex was frustrated, angry and miserable: even though he knew the voice, he never knew where it came from. Sleepily, his metallic grey eyes glanced around at his surroundings, his muscles weak with pain. Gradually, he lifted himself up.

Chapter 1

New Year

Smoothing out the snow in front of him with his paws, Vortex stretched his legs forward, letting out a yawn in the process. He sauntered through the forest, taking his time as prey wouldn’t have come out of their shelters yet. Unexpectedly, he stopped in his tracks and sniffed the air, sensing something unusual in it. Vortex decided to explore. Now, for some further development on Vortex and the unusual wolves of this forest, I say unusual because nature gave each of the wolves in the forest a gift, he himself had the gift of foresight. Naturally, this would mean he was able to see snippets of the future, but this did not apply for him. Vortex’s studies of his gift had been interrupted the day he left his pack, meaning that now his visions were very vague and often incomprehensible, leaving him in nothing but confusion and fear.

That also meant he tried to avoid these visions or anything that could possibly trigger them, but they always found a different or suspicious way to get back into his life, however much he tried to ignore them. It had lately dawned on him that these visions were triggered by his own forgotten memories and that they would never leave, no matter what. Sometimes, he managed to feel satisfied or even happy with himself, but after a few moments he felt as if he had fallen asleep inside a fantasy and now that he woke up, he felt lost again. Raising his head up to the sky, Vortex sniffed the air around him; sad or not, he had to hunt to keep himself alive. After all, being sad in the wild wasn’t an excuse to stop providing for yourself. Swiftly, he made his way to the place, where he sensed the smell to be stronger.

An elk calf stood in front of him. Rapidly, he ducked under the nearest bush and lowered himself out of view, until his stomach was touching the snow beneath him. There he perched, until an opportunity might arrive. After nothing but a few moments, the calf’s pack was far enough; now, he could not be distracted or prevented from being able to catch his prey. The small elk grazed peacefully on the scarce grass in between its front legs, unaware of the dangers surrounding it. Gradually, Vortex approached his innocent prey. Everything was going fine until a twig that snapped underneath his paw, making the elk jerk its head up. Looked like, he was going to have to run, again. As fast as a peregrine falcon, well almost; the elk dashed away from Vortex, who was now running so hard, he found it hard to breathe. In nothing but a fraction of a second, he pounced upon the yelping calf, bringing it down to the ground. He stared his prey in the eye, one swift bite and it all stopped.

After he had managed to catch his prey and eat it, he walked up to the highest cliff in the forest. It was his favourite place, he felt calm there. He gazed up at the silent sky and lost himself in the endless clouds. The shapes were irregular, giving the clouds an old abandoned feeling; there weren’t many, but just enough to be seen through the whole forest. Nevertheless, the sun did not shine as it usually did, today it was dimmer, one could even call it threatening. He tried his howl again, trying to retrieve the attention of his old pack. Several times, the pack had said they were like a family, and this family would not be hurt or forgotten; but they did hurt and forget him. This only made him learn that the worst feeling is not being alone but being forgotten by someone you would never forget. It’s only painful to use the dreaded word goodbye when you know it’s forever, when you know you will never get to say hello again; still, he hoped every day that he would be back with his pack. But deep inside, he knew that was nothing but a wish, nothing but a desire for a better future which would never come. Such was the fate that had been decided for him; all he could do was simply follow this one destiny, this one fate. It had been a hard day and it wasn’t going to get any easier either: as winter approached, it was going to get harder to hunt as all prey would hide, not to mention the cold weather and the occasional blizzards. The fact that he had no pack and no shelter would only make this harder for Vortex. Nonetheless, he did not let this fact take the best of him. As he stood and listened to the silence of the forest, something seemed to avert his attention; a type of stone. Slowly, he approached it.

He was but a few yards away, when his vision started becoming unclear and his legs unstable. Vortex plummeted to the floor and stood there motionless for a minute, or maybe an hour, it didn’t matter, to him it seemed like an eternity. Not being able to withstand his sudden weakness anymore, he went unconscious.

After what seemed like a few seconds, he woke up and found himself surrounded in a type of silver glass floor and an unusual, yet clear ceiling. A stern voice called out to him, this voice was cruel and harsh, unlike the voice in his dreams which was welcoming, soft and nostalgic.

The spirit took its time to formulate the answer, in the end all it said was, We can all become what we want to become, the way we achieve becoming this new self, is the thing that can change our lives. If this is for better or for worse, only you can decide.

With this statement, he came back to his senses, only to realise the stone wasn’t there anymore. What did it all mean?

Chapter 2

An Unexpected Acquaintance

The sun, with its red tinge getting more fixed as it lowered, stretched over the horizon. It wasn’t late, it was still early afternoon. Vortex did not mind this. He liked not being aware of his surroundings, not having the sun so he could see the colour of things not as reflected during the day, but as they truly are. There was something about the cold of the night brushing past his fur and the fear of being watched or even hunted that he could never understand. It was as equally terrifying as it was beautiful: he felt calmer and more independent. With that, he lay down on the cold yet oddly soft snow. The soft embrace of the wind brushed past his fur, its giant arms wrapping around Vortex. It was a cold embrace, harsh you could say; still in some way, it was comforting.

A rustling echoed through the forest making Vortex jump to his feet. Almost inaudibly, he snarled. Up until this day, he had never been caught by surprise, Vortex wasn’t going to let this change: he couldn’t, he had a reputation to uphold. The soft thump of the footsteps drew nearer. Without warning, Vortex sprung at this unexpected visitor. Oddly enough, it was a coyote.

I mean no harm, please don’t kill me! yelped the coyote.

Vortex let her go. So, why were you sneaking up on me then?

I wasn’t, it’s just that I was being followed by a pack of wolves and had nowhere better to hide, the answer returned.

What’s your name then? asked Vortex.