How the hedgehog got his spikes
‘I’ve never seen a pig as drunk as that in all my life, and that so early in September!’
As drunk as a pig
FREE-RANGE pigs rootling in apple orchards is a sight redolent of the rural idyll. The pigs are especially happy in this setting when the warm autumn sunshine has rotted the windfalls enough to turn them alcoholic. At that time of year, sheep, cattle and pigs can be quite entertaining under the influence of those fruits that weren’t officially turned into cider.
There was one pig owner, however, who followed the example of his extraordinary pig all year round, which was easy for him to do because he owned a pub. His pig was unusual in that it had six legs and people used to come from quite a distance to admire this marvel. The publican encouraged these visitors because, having made the journey, they inevitably increased his trade. However, no matter how many visitors the pig had, their revenue could not make up for the loss of stock that the publican’s drinking took out of the business.
As he drank more, he became more incapable, and his wife decided to step in to save the pub before he drank it into the ground. It was she who ran everything, from ordering supplies to serving customers. No matter how crafty she was in her attempts to limit his consumption, she was no match for the cunning of a dedicated
