JAR: A Vessel in the Hands of the Potter: The First Twenty Years in the Life of Jesse Alan Rivers

By Jesse Alan Rivers and Jedd Medefind

In a world full of many challenges, trials, and uncertainties, one can easily become discouraged and depressed, and feel hopeless. In this memoir of the first twenty years of life for Jesse Alan Rivers, many challenges, trials, and uncertainties are revealed, but a great hope and victory resound as the central theme to this story, as Jesse encounters the fingerprints and hand of the Potter on his life; God, the Potter, is shaping and molding Jesse, a vessel in the hands of the Potter, for His glory.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Resource Publications
• Release date: Nov 6, 2020
• ISBN: 9781725284173

Jesse Alan Rivers

Jesse Rivers is a passionate follower and servant of Jesus Christ. As founder and CEO of Abogar International Ministries, Jesse advocates for, and ministers to, vulnerable children of Latin America, working to see them have forever homes, forever families, and educational opportunities. As a motivational speaker, Jesse enjoys promoting awareness and support for needy children, as well as many other topics and themes. Jesse loves the beach, fellowship with others, and a good meal!

Book preview

Chapter 1

In the Beginning . . .

My introduction to this world began on a cold and blustery winter night, in the city of Lewiston, Maine. I was born at 11 : 30 pm, on November 27 th, 1978 . The weather outside was quite chilly (a brutal ten degrees Fahrenheit), but the situation I was born into was even more frigid. I was born not only to people in financial hardship, but also as an unwanted child. I was not the only unwanted child though, as I was the third child (first boy) born to the biological mother and biological father, Shelly and Paul.

Shelly and Paul seemed to share a mutual mindset that children were a hassle, a problem, and too much responsibility. When Paul learned that Shelly was pregnant with me, he was so upset about having yet another child that he just packed up and walked out. At least, that is how Shelly explained it. It is hard to know the truth though, because Shelly was quite prone to lie, deceive, manipulate, and to control things. She always strove to paint herself in a good light, and to make things work out for her favor. For whatever reason, though, Paul exited the picture.

Shelly was not happy that Paul had left her, and she wanted to win him back. Right from my birth I was exposed to her deceit and manipulation. I believe that she figured, if she named me after Paul, being his first and only son, he would naturally come running back. She seemed to have thought that a father, having a son who bore his name, would feel a great sense of pride and connectedness to the child, which would cause Paul to return home. Therefore, Shelly named me ____ ____ ____ Junior; thereby giving me Paul’s full name and making me a junior (Jr.). However, Shelly’s attempt to control the situation and win Paul back failed. It appears as if he did not take pride in having a son that bore his name, as he had left and was to never return.

Though Paul had withdrawn himself from the picture, while I was still in the womb, his name that I now bore was not so quickly gone. I had an ugly curse placed upon my life; being named after a man who could not, or did not want to, be a part of my life. My identity was connected with one who had abandoned me, before I was even born. Shelly’s master plan of manipulation to win Paul back had failed. So, while his name stuck with me for a long time, Paul did not.

God, the Potter, in His infinite wisdom, placed a fingerprint on my life from the day I was born though. No one ever called me by the name that I had been given at birth. Everyone simply knew me as J.R.—the initials used to abbreviate Junior. If you were to venture with me back to Maine, and if people there still remember me, you would hear them all call me, J.R. I see this nickname as the first of many fingerprints of God, the Potter, upon my life.

After Paul’s departure, Shelly blamed me and sought to punish me. At least, that is my understanding for why she abused me so intensely. Time and time again, she manipulated and controlled situations to make my life miserable. She seemed bent on punishing me and removing pleasure from my life. Praise the Potter that He had enabled me to see the beauty in life, even while suffering the great pain and deprivation that Shelly so regularly caused me.

While I was still an infant, Shelly decided to marry another man; Stefan. Stefan was over six feet tall and quite strong, due to being raised on a farm. Stefan was a man of a similar mindset and perspective about children as Shelly. In fact, he was even more emphatic that he did not want children, and he was always reminding me and the two biological sisters, whom I will refer to as Anne and Kate, that he was not our father.

Stefan’s attitude was not so much to manipulate or control us, as Shelly strived so much to do, but rather, he just wanted to have absolutely nothing to do with us. It seemed that kids were not a consideration for him, even in marriage. He made sure to tell us often that we were not his kids, and that we would never have anything that belonged to him. He was a man of explosive anger at times, and his anger, height, and strength worked together to almost kill the three of us children on several occasions. Praise God for His angels and protective hand to save and guard our lives. Each time the hand and fingerprints of God were upon us, to enable us to endure what no child should ever have to