The Other Side Of The Lies

By Callie Ansar

Its 1996. A heartbroken, 18 year old Karen Faris sits crying on a bench beside a payphone at the Jersey shore. All she wants is to hear David's voice, but it's a different voice that pulls her away from her past and leads her to happiness.
Or so she thought.
What Karen thinks is love at first sight turns out to be lies at first sight. From the day they met, all Ramsey does is spew lies to Karen about his past, only telling her minimal truths to keep her close to him. When Ramsey gets too caught up in his own lies, he turns to suicide as his only escape.
Ramsey's death leads a devastated Karen to uncover unfathomable truths about his secret life. Tormented by the letter that sits in the sealed envelope in her nightstand, Karen finally decides to read it months after it is given to her. It isn't until then that she finally gets a glimpse into what Ramsey's life was like on the other side of the lies.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Tablo Publishing
• Release date: Dec 1, 2020
• ISBN: 9781649694218

Book preview

1996

The payphone outside of the Seashore Motel was mine for the taking.  I sat on the green bench that stood beside it, put quarters in and dialed David’s phone number for hours.  Nobody ever answered   but I continued to do it anyway, hoping that I’d eventually hear his voice on the other end.  I never did.  Instead, it was a different David’s voice that surprised me on that hot, June afternoon. 

Are you Karen? the voice asked. 

Startled, I looked up, blinded a little by the Jersey sun.  I saw a tall, dark and handsome guy standing there, smiling at me with the biggest smile I had ever seen.  I was just staring when he asked again, Are you Karen?  Lauri’s friend Karen, from Queens? 

 Um, yeah, and you are? I asked with a confused sniffle. 

Cool.  I’m David.  David Ramsey, he said putting his cigarette in his mouth so he could hold out his now empty hand to shake mine.  I curiously extended my arm and placed my hand in his, never really making eye contact with him.  We shook hands as he said, Lauri told me that you were coming down here with her.  I’ve been looking forward to meeting you. 

Once he said his name and moved out of the glare of the sun, I realized that I had met him before.  David was an upstate guy, whom everyone referred to as Ramsey, and if you knew one of them, you knew them all.  But Ramsey was different, he stood out.  He was very tall and extremely handsome.  From what I had heard, his body was built like a God and when he smiled he could light up a room.  He was the pitcher for his high schools baseball team and one of the most coveted guys at Middle Woods High School.  He had liked my friend Jenn for a little while and met us at a club one night a few months back.  I remember watching him put his arms around her waist while he stood behind her, whispering something in her ear.  I remember being jealous of her in that moment, not because I longed for love, I had my David at that time, but there was just something about him that was enticing.  Their love affair however, was short lived.  It actually ended that night when Michael, Jenns ex boyfriend, showed up at the club.  I guess old boyfriends bring up old feelings because Jenn wound up going home with Michael that night, and David was soon forgotten.   

And seriously, his fucking name was David.   

I wish I could say the same, but it’s nice to meet you, Ramsey, were the words that flowed out of my mouth.  I couldn’t bring myself to call him David.  It would just make me want to cry. 

Can I ask what you’re doing here, crying? he asked in a tone that implied he found humor in what I was doing. 

He popped another Marlboro Red in his mouth, and faced the open box in my direction offering me one, as he waited for my answer.  I reached in the box and grabbed the soft brown filter of one of his cigarettes.  I wasn’t a smoker, but I enjoyed a cigarette every once in a while.  Ramsey held his lighter up to the tip of the cigarette that was hanging from my lips.  After I inhaled my first drag, I looked over at him.  He was just standing there smiling at me, patiently waiting for me to speak.  He looked amazing in a white tee shirt and red shorts, which was most likely a bathing suit.  He donned a red baseball cap with the letters MW embroidered in white, probably standing for Middle Woods.   

When I thought about why I was actually sitting there crying, tears began to stream down my face.  

My vision was blurred by my feelings but I could see Ramsey coming closer to me.  He crouched down right in front of me so that our faces were somewhat level to each other.  Again, he popped his smoke in his mouth and used both of his free hands to gently cup my face.  He proceeded to gently wipe my tears with his thumbs.  He kept his hands on my face for a few more seconds and just looked into my eyes.  In those few seconds, I forgot about how much I hated when people touched my face, but instead took in what was going on.   

I closed my eyes and took in his scent.  His hands smelled of cigarettes, but his cologne also lingered on them.  As I breathed him in, I could smell the slightest hint of beer.  My mind was racing trying to figure out what he was doing there with me.  Why was this gorgeous stranger sitting on a payphone bench with me, when he should have been enjoying his prom weekend?  I let him keep his hands on my face until I opened my eyes, only to see his brown eyes staring straight at me.  He smiled.  I smiled back. 

Thank you, I said as I placed my hands around his forearms and lowered them from my face.  I feel like such an idiot, I said, and as the words came out of my mouth I began to cry, again. 

He got up from his crouched position and stood straight in front of me.  I sat there and puffed on my cigarette while he extended his hands above his head to stretch.  What am I going to do with you, Karen? he asked as his tee shirt lifted ever so slightly, revealing only a tiny bit of tight, tan abs and the beginning of his happy trail. 

Karen, I heard him say again, as he caught me staring at his stomach. 

Embarrassed, I flicked my cigarette on the floor and looked up at him.  I felt myself blushing, but I could only hope that the redness was masked by the tan I had hopefully gotten by sitting on that damn bench all day.  He held his hands out in front of me, palms up, and I put both of my hands in his.  He gently closed his hands around mine and lifted me up off of the green bench that I had occupied for hours that day.   

Ramsey stood almost a whole foot taller than me, so I had to literally look up when I wanted to look at him.  Squinting from the sun I said, Oh God, Ramsey, I’m so embarrassed.  I’m so sorry that I keep crying. 

Trying not to break our eye contact, I shielded my eyes with my hands to block the sun.  I continued to look up at him when he said, Don’t apologize, kid, just promise me that you’ll stop crying.  Listen, Lauri kind of told me what happened between you and your boyfriend. 

Ex, I interrupted. 

Right, you and your ex.  Anyway, I told her that I would love to show you a good time this weekend and get your mind off of him.  What’s his name again? 

David, I responded. 

Jesus, he said with a laugh.  Please don’t ever call me David again, ok? he demanded. 

You got it, as long as you never call me Karen again, ok?  I demanded right back as he gave me a cockeyed look. I was given my name by my mother who was the Carpenters biggest fan the year I was born.  Sure, Karen was a pretty name, but when Ramsey called me Kid, it did something to my body that made me know I never wanted to be referred to as anything else by him. 

Ramsey spoke again, So, then we have ourselves a deal.  How about we make another one? 

I was still standing, blocking the sunlight from my eyes to look up at him, when I found myself extremely curious.  What’s that? I asked. 

Promise me that you won’t cry for the rest of the day, and I promise that I’ll show you a great time for the rest of the weekend.  You won’t even remember that dick’s name by the time you go home, Ramsey proposed. 

I lowered my right hand and held it out to him and we shook on it. 

You got yourself a deal. 

Well come on then, let’s get the party started, Ramsey said, seeming pleased with my response. 

With that, I grabbed the coin purse I had brought down from my room that morning.  I collected the five dollars in quarters that I had gotten from the arcade on the boardwalk earlier that day, and lamely placed into a giant D on the bench.  As I put them back into the purse one by one, I couldn’t help but be grateful that Ramsey didn’t see that I had shaped them into the first letter of my ex-boyfriends name.  Jesus, I was a loser.  Once I snapped the top of the purse shut, I stood back up and faced Ramsey. 

 Got all your stuff? he asked. 

Yup.  So what are we going to do? I inquired. 

Well, what are you working with under there? he asked as he gently tugged at my jean shorts.  To my surprise, his touch tugged on more than just my shorts. 

What the fuck did you just ask me? I hissed defensively. 

Laughing, he responded, Calm down, Kid.  I was just wondering what you have on under your clothes.  Do you have a bathing suit on?  Do you want to go in the pool? 

I don’t have my suit on, but it’s hot as shit out here and I’ve been in the sun all morning.  I’d love to go in the pool.  Do you mind if we just stop by my room quick so I can change and grab a towel? 

Of course, he said with that unbelievable smile.  What room are you in again? 

208, I told him.  He held out his hand for me and once I placed mine in his, he started walking toward the stairs that led up to the second floor of the motel. 

I never did stuff like this.  By that I mean let a stranger lead me up to my motel room.  I wasn’t afraid of Ramsey, but I didn’t really know how to act around him.  I mean the last guy whose hand I held was David’s and that didn’t turn out too well.  It did lead me to Jersey that weekend though.  Maybe some things were just meant to be.  After quickly coming to this realization, I was becoming excited to spend the day with this handsome stranger.   

He walked in front of me as we ascended the outside stairs of the Seashore Motel, never letting go of my hand.  Once we reached the top of the stairs, the outdoor hallway was crawling with teenagers, and it made me reminiscent of the week that I recently spent in Cancun during spring break.  That was another thing that didn’t turn out too well.  This was supposed to be fun for me and that’s why I was there with Lauri and that was my new intention.  I was going to forget about David and start having fun. 

Of course room 208 was on the opposite end of the hallway from where the staircase was.  As we weaved in and out of the scantily clad teenagers, I cringed every time a girl approached Ramsey.  Maybe another time, was always his response, and again, he never let go of my hand.  We also heard shouts of, Ramsey, who’s the new piece? as we passed, but he simply ignored everyone and headed straight to my room. 

Once we finally arrived at my door, we stood there for a second while I retrieved the plastic, orange, diamond shaped key chain that held the key to my room.  As I placed the key into the key hole, I glanced down the crowded balcony and most eyes were on us.  I hated the fact that all of these people now thought I was bringing Ramsey into my room to do God knows what.  Now I was going to have a reputation upstate, a place that was normally my salvation.  Great. 

Noticing my turned head, Ramsey placed a hand on my waist and leaned down to whisper in my ear, Don’t worry about them, Kid.  Nobody thinks you’re a slut.  The girls are jealous of you and the guys are jealous of me.  Think of it as a win-win. 

I couldn’t believe that he knew exactly what I was thinking, but it made me laugh and with that I turned the key and opened the door.  I stepped inside first, only to find Lauri and her boyfriend, Danny, lying in the exact same spot I had left them in hours before.  They were sprawled out on the bed they had been sharing, noshing on a bag of chips. 

Wow, this room is a lot nicer than mine, Ramsey said as he approached the unoccupied bed and sat down.  Hey Kid, your bed is a lot more comfortable than mine, he said with a laugh as he lay his body flat and put his head on my pillow.  He turned his body toward Lauri and Danny.  So, what have you two been doing cooped up in here all day? 

Danny replied with a lazy, What do you think, bro? 

You’re an asshole, Danny, Lauri snapped.  Ramsey, she excitedly shouted as she jumped off of her bed and jumped next to him on mine.  She placed her body exactly as his was and said, I’m so glad you found Karen.  What have you guys been doing? she asked. 

I was still standing fairly close to the door, once again taking in my surroundings.  Our room was a stereotypical gross motel room fashioned with tacky furniture and bed spreads that looked like they were decades old.  And don’t even get me started on what the bed spreads were probably infested with.  The room had a musty smell mixed in with cigarettes and pot.  The bathroom was pink and black and had a leaky faucet.  And Ramsey thought this was nicer than his?  I could only imagine what his room looked like.  I also couldn’t take my eyes off of the two bodies lying on my bed.  Ramsey looked amazing laid out in all of his gloriousness and Lauri looked perfect lying next to him.  Lauri was a natural beauty.  She had dark hair that fell to the middle of her back with the slightest of waves.  She had dark brown eyes and a perfect little nose that sat right above a huge smile.  Her body was long and lean and toned in all of the right places.  There, lying next to each other, they looked like the perfect couple.  Danny didn’t seem to mind, so why did I? 

I came out of my fog when I heard Ramsey speak.  Well, not so much.  We just came up here so Karen can change.  We are gonna go hit the pool.  I see you have your bathing suit on, want to join us? 

I waited for her answer.   

I loved Lauri, and Danny was ok too, but I kind of wanted to be alone with Ramsey.  I didn’t want them there.  I was so happy when she said, Maybe later.  We’re gonna smoke first.  Do you want to join us? 

I could always go for a smoke, sure.  Hey Kid, what about you?  Ramsey asked. 

No thanks.  I’m just going to go in the bathroom and change, I answered as I walked over to grab my duffle bag.  I picked up my white bag and made my way across the small room to the bathroom.  I closed and locked the door behind me before I started rummaging through my bag to look for my bathing suit.  I had brought a few suits down to the shore with me, but I wanted my orange bikini.  It made my boobs look great.  When I finally found it, I quickly undressed and put on my bathing suit.  After tying both strings on the top of the suit, I lifted each of my boobs, one at a time, to ensure that I was showing maximum cleavage.  I stood there and looked at myself for a few minutes in the full length mirror that hung on the inside of the bathroom door.   

I don’t know why I always put myself down.  Standing there staring in the mirror, I took myself in.  I had thick, light brown hair that was curly.  I usually wore my hair straight, but it took so long to straighten, so on days like this where I would be in a pool or at the beach, I left it curly.  It was just easier.  I had inherited my father’s green eyes and my mom’s great smile.  My body, like Lauri’s, was toned, however, I wasn’t as tall as she was.  I didn’t have huge boobs, but they were big enough and my butt was the perfect bubble.  And I had a savage tan at the moment. I was looking good.  I guess everything that happened with David ruined me and everything about me.  Not that I was ever overly confident in myself, but after that ordeal, I lost the person that I used to be.  I needed to find her and get her back. 

I could hear muffled voices through the door and realized that I had been in the bathroom way too long.  I grabbed the jean shorts that I had on all day and slipped them back on.  I found a white tank top and threw that on as well.  I put the contents of my duffle back in the bag and opened the bathroom door.   

Ramsey was off of my bed and now sitting on a tweed chair, smoking a cigarette.  Lauri and Danny were sitting up in their bed, taking turns smoking out of her bowl. 

Lauri exhaled as she said, Want some, Ka? 

No, not right now.  Maybe tonight, I answered as I wondered why Lauri continued to ask me if I wanted some because I always turned her down and I always would turn her down.  My father always said that marijuana is a gateway drug, and he branded this statement into my brain.  I quickly turned to Ramsey and asked, Almost ready?  I couldn’t wait to get out of there.  I knew it was only pot, but I was always uncomfortable around drugs, maybe because my father is a former addict.  I hoped Ramsey wasn’t really into this scene because I wanted to have fun today, not sit around and watch people get high. 

 Sure thing, he said as he put his cigarette out.  He stood up and stretched his hands above his head again, and again, I caught a glimpse of those abs. 

I grabbed my beach towel off of the back of the chair and placed it in my beach bag.  I threw in my wallet and room key as well. 

So, we’ll see you guys later?  I asked. 

Yeah, you’ll be down by the pool, right? Lauri asked. 

Yeah, and I have my key so you don’t have to sit in here and wait for me, ok? 

I know, Karen.  Try to have some fun. 

Ramsey chimed in with, Seriously Lauri?  She’s hanging out with me.  Of course she’s going to have fun. 

Don’t have too much fun, Ramsey, Danny demanded. 

Whatever you say boss.  Let’s go, Kid, he replied, and with that Ramsey grabbed my hand and headed for the door. 

3

 As the door closed behind us, Ramsey made a left out of room 208 and headed down the crowded hall towards the stairs.  As we walked, guys called out, Way to go, Ramsey, while the girls shot daggers at me with their eyes.  Becoming uneasy, I squeezed his hand and right away he became aware of my feelings. 

Don’t worry, Kid.  I won’t let go.  Don’t let them bother you, Ramsey assured me as we finally made it to the stairwell and walked down the two flights of stairs into the parking lot of the Seashore motel. 

Pool or beach? he asked. 

Pool then beach, I replied. 

I like it.  Let’s go, he said as he began to lead us to the back of the motel where the pool was. 

Prom weekend at the Jersey shore was just like Cancun during spring break.  This simple fact was never more apparent to me than when we entered the pool area.  There were 18 year olds everywhere.  The majority of the guys at the pool were pretty buff and tan.  Some of them stood in front of a group of girls and flexed their muscles, while others tried their luck the traditional way, with cheesy pick up lines.  The girls sat on their lounge chairs with their hair and makeup done so flawlessly as if they were going to a club rather than sitting by a pool.  Every last one of them had skimpy bikinis on, that showed off their overdeveloped bodies.  The only thing that was different here than in Mexico was that the pool in Mexico was a lavish free form pool and the Seashores, a mere rectangle.  There was also a swim up bar in the pool in Mexico, and here, everyone had coolers next to their chairs.  As if my self confidence hadn’t been at an all time low, it just hit rock bottom.   

As I took in the scene, Ramsey opened the white gate that gave us access to the pool deck.  When we stepped in, hand in hand, I could feel eyes on us and knots beginning to build in my stomach as the gate closed behind us.  

I see my boys over there, come on, he said as he led me toward his friends. 

All eyes were on us as we approached.  There was a mix of girls and guys, some familiar and some not so familiar.  Ramsey was a gentleman and introduced me to every last one of them.  I felt so out of place with my jean shorts and flip flops but for some reason, standing there holding Ramsey’s hand, I felt like I had the best accessory at the pool that day. 

Billy, Ramsey’s best friend as he introduced himself, handed me a beer and said, So how do you guys know each other? 

I’m friends with Lauri Ryan.  I came down here with her and Danny last night. 

It was few seconds before he answered and said, Oh, now I know who you are.  You’re her friend who lives in Queens, and comes up on the weekends, right?  You and your boyfriend just broke up, right?  I heard you were gonna be here this weekend, Billy said, licking his lips. 

Yeah, that’s me I guess, I said before taking a swig out of the brown bottle that was handed to me. 

So how is it that we’ve never met before? Billy asked again. 

I have no idea.  Do you ever hang out with Lauri? I asked him right back. 

Not really, why? 

Well then, I guess that’s why we’ve never met, wouldn’t you say? 

Yeah, I guess you’re right.  She hangs out with that dickhead Danny.  I don’t know why he thinks he’s so fucking cool just because he sells pot.  I think he’s a loser, Billy rambled on. 

What? I naively questioned. 

Ramsey intervened by saying, Ok, have another beer, dick.  Me and Karen are going in the pool.  Come on, Kid. 

Sounds good, I said.  I turned to one of the familiar girls, Erin, and asked if she would watch my beer and my bag. 

No problem, she said, as I placed my bag on the lounge chair next to her. 

For a second I forgot that I needed to take off my tank top and shorts before I got in the pool.  I hated this part about going in water because it always reminded me of a strip tease.  First you pull your shirt over your head and then you shimmy out of whatever bottom you have on.  Then you shake your hair out and look around to see who is looking at you.  I was almost ready to tell Ramsey that I felt sick and run back to my room when he started his show. 

First to come off was his hat.  His wavy brown hair was now exposed and glistened in the sun light.  He threw it on the lounge chair where my bag and towel sat.  Next was his shirt.  As soon as he crossed his arms at the bottom of his tee and began to pull it up, I could feel those butterflies again.  Ramsey wasn’t as beefy as the other guys by the pool that day, but boy was his body toned in all the right places.  Impeccable pecks, perfect arms and absolutely amazing abs made up this man’s upper body.  He then threw his shirt on the chair with his hat, and looked at me and asked, Are you going in with your clothes on? as he kicked off his sneakers. 

I shook my head no. 

Well then, come on.  I’m hot. 

I was getting hot too, but only in a different way than he was talking about.  I then began my show.  First off were my flip flops, which I just flicked next to my beer that was on the floor by our chair.  Next off was my tank top which revealed my newly pierced navel, a constant reminder of my trip to Mexico.  Once my shirt was off, I threw it on the lounge chair, just as Ramsey did.  Then, I unbuttoned my shorts and shimmied them down my legs.  I stepped out of them and then flicked them onto the chair with my foot.  I then took my hair out of the pony tail it had been in all day.  I took it out because I hated going under water with my hair up, but I also wanted to look as attractive as possible.  Given my competition at the pool, I needed as much help as I could get.  As I placed the elastic band around my wrist and swished my hair from side to side, I heard a few whistles, which made me blush.  I then grabbed at the back of my bikini bottom to make sure I had maximum coverage on both butt cheeks, in case it had ridden up a little.  I coyly looked up at Ramsey to see his reaction. 

Facing me, he grabbed my waist with his right hand, leaned down and whispered in my left ear, I’m regretting bringing you down here now.  All eyes are on you, Kid.  I’m gonna have to let these guys know that you’re here with me.  Following his words, he softly moved his lips from my ear never losing contact with my skin, and kissed my cheek. 

I don’t know if it was the fact that we were standing there almost naked, the fact that every time his skin touched mine it felt like fireworks going off in my body, or the fact that he wanted people to know that I was with him that made me want to grab him and go a little further with that kiss.  Once he moved his face away from my cheek, he looked me straight in the eye.  What was probably only a minute seemed like an hour of us intensely looking at each other.  My desire to throw my arms around his neck and passionately kiss him grew stronger with every second. 

Our eye contact was broken when I was shoved forward by someone, landing right in Ramsey’s arms.  

Oh excuse me, did I just do that? a snarly voice spoke. 

I looked up at Ramsey and although I only knew him for about an hour, I could see a look of disgust on his face.  I didn’t even have to turn around to see who the voice belonged to because once Ramsey helped me off of him and back into my own space, the voice was standing next to him, with her arm locked into his. 

So who the fuck are you, skank? the voice questioned.  The voice, by the way, was gorgeous.  She was tall and blonde with legs that looked like they’d never end.  Her blonde hair was flawlessly straight and her tan was intensified by her white bikini, which barely covered her huge breasts. 

Nicole, why don’t you just get the fuck out of here and leave her alone? Erin shouted from her lounge chair.  Do you have to cause trouble everywhere you go? Erin asked, as she got up and left the pool area. 

Shut the fuck up, Erin.  This has nothing to do with you.  This has to do with me, Ramsey, and this skank who is trying to bang my boyfriend, the voice shouted as Erin disappeared. 

Ramsey stood with a stone cold look on his face.  He released his arm from her and said, Nicole, we broke up months ago because you started screwing someone behind my back.  The only reason I went to the prom with you is because I already paid for it and I wanted to be there with my friends.  I wasn’t your date.  We simply sat at the same table, we didn’t even go there together, nor did we say one fucking word to each other all night.  So, do yourself a favor and get the fuck out of my face before I lose my temper.  My business and who I spend my time with is none of your business anymore. He stood so close to her with his jaw clenched that I was a little frightened for her. 

She took a step back and looked at me.  You’re not even good enough for him.  Look at you.  Look at me.  I’m what he likes, not girls like you.  Don’t waste your time, loser.  You’re a game for him sweetie, a mere joke.  You don’t really think he likes you, do you? she laughed as she shoved my shoulder as she passed by me, making her exit from the pool. 

I never moved.  I don’t know if it was my heart or my feet that felt like they weighed a thousand pounds, but I couldn’t move.  I couldn’t look at Ramsey either.  I was humiliated in front of all of those people.  If I could run away, I would have.  Instead, I just stood there as tears streamed down my face.  Ramsey never moved from his spot either, as a look of anguish spread across his face.  Suddenly, I heard Lauri screaming my name. 

I still didn’t move. 

She kept calling my name until she placed herself right in front of me, Erin right beside her. 

Jesus Karen, Lauri huffed, clearly out of breath from the run down here from her room.  Erin came and told me that Nicole was bothering you.  Are you ok?  Where is that bitch? 

I shrugged my shoulders as I wiped my tears. 

Come on sweetie, let’s go, she said as she wrapped her arm around me. 

Just get me out of here, I demanded. 

We began to head for the white gate when Billy caught up to us.  He stopped us and said, I like girls like you, Karen.  Come find me later if you want. 

I completely ignored him, while Lauri couldn’t contain herself.  You are such a douchebag, Billy.  And you, she turned around to face Ramsey, who was putting his hat back on, you are a fucking asshole.  I don’t know what happened here, but fuck you, Ramsey. 

As upset and humiliated as I was, I couldn’t help but turn and look in Ramsey’s direction once the white gate closed behind us.  He was standing in the same spot, staring at me, as a look of grief now devoured his face. 

4

I’m gonna kill her when I see her.  Friggen kill her, Lauri ranted all the way back to our room.  Who does that bitch think she is anyway? I don’t think she’s that great.   

I knew she was talking to me, but I was blocking her out.  As she led our way through the crowded corridor to our room, multiple whistles followed us.  It was then that I realized I was walking around in my bikini.  In the midst of all of that commotion, I forgot to grab my things.  I stopped two doors down from our room. 

Lauri, I have to go back down.  I left everything down there, my wallet, my bag, my towel, my clothes, I said worriedly. 

Don’t worry about it.  I’ll run down in a few minutes.  I’d like to give Ramsey a piece of my mind anyway. 

He didn’t do anything, Lau.  It was all the girl.  What was her name, Nicole?  He couldn’t have known what was going to come out of her mouth.  And you know what, she’s right.  I am a loser.  Guys don’t like girls like me.  They want gorgeous, flashy girls.  I know David did anyway.  Don’t fight with Ramsey, it’s not his fault, I pleaded as tears began to fill my eyes. 

We had made it to room 208 before she said, Well, I still want to rip his balls off. 

With a turn of the knob, we were back inside our room.  A few candles were now lit, which meant that during Erin’s disturbance Lauri and Danny were either getting it on, or that it just smelled so bad in there that they had to light a candle.  Either way, I was grateful for the pleasing scent masking the musty odor.   

I didn’t see Danny at first glance, but soon heard the shower running.  Lauri looked at me and said, He’s in the shower.  We were gonna run and grab a bite.  Why don’t you change and come with us? 

No, I don’t really feel like eating right now.  I think I’ll hop in the shower and just chill out here until you guys get back. 

Ok sweetie, she softly said.   

I went in my duffle and grabbed a pair of shorts and hurried to put them on before Danny came out of the bathroom.  I plopped on my bed and watched Lauri as she fixed her hair and put on a little makeup. 

So tell me what that bitch said to you, Lauri said as she blew herself a kiss in the mirror. 

Nothing I didn’t already know, Lau.  She called me a skank and said that I was trying to bang her boyfriend.  Then Ramsey went off on her.  And then she called me a loser and told me that Ramsey would never like a girl like me, and that I was a joke to him, I painfully told her. 

When she was finished fussing with herself, she came and lay next to me on my bed.  Karen, you are beautiful and smart and funny and anyone would be lucky to have you love them.  Just because David couldn’t see that doesn’t mean anyone else won’t.  You are not a loser.  You are good enough, for anyone.  Lauri went on to explain, She’s the loser, Karen.  She’s so pathetic when it comes to Ramsey.  He found out that she had been cheating on him for months with this guy from Pinekill, he’s actually a pitcher too, just like Ramsey.  Well, he broke up with her and she lost it.  She just wanted to have her cake and eat it too.  He was heartbroken, but never showed her that and that is what pissed her off the most.  She continued, Honestly, that’s why I asked him to hang out with you.  He’s been where you are and I thought he could help.  I really didn’t even think something as bad as Nicole would happen.  I’m so sorry, Karen. 

Don’t be sorry, Lau, it’s not your fault.  It’s nobody’s fault.  It’s just another vacation ruined because I’m just not good enough for guys.  You know the messed up thing about the whole situation, besides that girl crushing me?  I was actually having a really good time with Ramsey.  I felt like we were connecting in some way.  I guess I was wrong about that too, I said as Danny finally emerged from the bathroom, a cloud of steam following him.   

He was fully dressed and whistled at Lauri.  Looking good girl.  Let’s go eat, I’m starving, he said as he walked over to the dresser and grabbed his wallet.  He was putting it in his pocket when he asked, Coming with us, Karen? 

Thanks Danny, but I’m just gonna hang here and take a shower.  I need to cool down after that confrontation. 

Ok, so we’ll see you later then, he said as he grabbed Lauri’s hand and helped her off of the bed. 

Karen, we’ll finish this conversation later.  I’ll bring us back some wine coolers.  See you in about an hour, Lauri said as she kissed my cheek before they left the room. 

As soon as they left, I went to the door to lock the deadbolt.  I closed all of the curtains and began to take off my clothes before heading into the bathroom.  I let the water run in the shower for a few seconds to make sure it was nice and hot.  Once the temperature was where I wanted it to be, I hopped in.  The water felt great as it washed the tears off of my face.  I washed and conditioned my hair and even shaved my legs.  I stayed in the shower for a while, just standing there, hoping the water would wash away my misery.  Unfortunately, showers don’t do that. 

I stepped out of the shower and wrapped a way too small towel around my body.  As I emerged from the bathroom, there was a knock at the door, which scared the shit out of me. 

I assumed that it was Lauri or Danny not being able to get in because I locked the deadbolt.  But what if it was Nicole?  My heart began to race.  I slowly walked over to the door as someone continued to knock, and I peered into the peep hole.  It was Ramsey.  Oh God, what do I do? I whispered to myself. 

Karen, I know you’re in there.  Open the door, I have your stuff, he said through the door.  My stuff.  Shit, I completely forgot about my stuff.  I needed my stuff, so I had to let him in. 

Forgetting that all I was wearing was a towel that wouldn’t cover a toddler properly, I opened the door.  I stood behind the door as I cracked it open, just wide enough so he could let himself in.  As soon as he was in, I closed the door. 

He wasn’t facing me when he said, Well, Kid, you didn’t have to go to all of this trouble for me, referring to the candles that had been lit by Danny and Lauri. 

Believe me, I didn’t, I answered and he turned around at the sound of my voice. 

When he set his eyes on me, they grew as big as his smile.  His mouth dropped open when he said, Well, you didn’t have to do that for me either. 

Oh believe me, I didn’t, I answered again, just standing there.   

He exhaled.  So, here’s your stuff.  Why don’t you put this towel on?  It will probably cover you better, he said as he handed me my beach towel.  I guess Nicole was right.  He wasn’t interested in me and handing me a towel to cover myself up proved it. 

Thanks, I said as I wrapped the towel over the smaller one already on me.  I appreciate you bringing my stuff back.  I completely forgot about it. 

There were a few seconds of silence.  Awkward silence. 

I spoke again and said, Ok, so thanks again.  I’m gonna get dressed now.  See you later.  I wasn’t mad at Ramsey and I don’t know why it bothered me so much that Nicole told me he wasn’t interested in me, but it did.  And that made me not want to be around him. 

I’ll wait out here while you change, he said. 

Wait for what? my attitude now coming out. 

Karen we need to talk about what happened down there.  And you broke your promise to me. 

Refresh my memory. 

You promised you wouldn’t cry for the rest of the day, and you did. 

Attitude in full effect now, I said, The promise wasn’t broken.  I wasn’t crying because of David. I was crying because your girlfriend was a completely awful to me.

Ex, he said. 

My apologies, your ex girlfriend, I said. 

He laughed.  Touché, Kid.  Touché.  Come on seriously, can we please talk?  He looked sincere as he looked at me, draped in layers of towels while my hair dripped water droplets onto the floor. 

Ok, stay here.  I’ll go in the bathroom and change. 

I grabbed my duffle and headed in the bathroom.  Heart racing once again, I scrambled to put something on, anything on.  Not wanting to empty the contents of my bag onto the disgusting bathroom floor, I grabbed the first thing I could, which was a black bikini.  I quickly put it on and then reached in and grabbed out my purple sundress.  I was just hanging out in my room, so who the hell did I need to impress? 

I ran a pick through my hair and left it down.  I had gotten a lot of color that day and it was more predominant after my shower.  I didn’t really need much makeup, so I swiped some mascara over my lashes and put a quick coat of gloss on my lips. 

I gave myself a once over in the mirror and headed out into the other room.  Ramsey was sitting back in the tweed chair, puffing on a cigarette.  Have a seat, he said as he exhaled and motioned to the second ugly chair that sat across the table from where he was seated. 

I sat down and grabbed a cigarette out of the open box he left on the table.  Before I could reach for the lighter, his arm was extended in front of me, with the lighter at the tip of my cigarette.  I slowly inhaled and said, Thank you, as I exhaled and the smoke came out of my mouth. 

Plan on going swimming later? he asked, clearly curious as to why I had on a bathing suit. 

Yeah, I’m meeting Nicole at the pool around 5:00 for a dip.  Care to join? I sarcastically answered. 

He laughed and then said, You look really pretty, Karen. 

Don’t, I snapped. 

Don’t what?  I can’t tell you that you look pretty? 

Look Ramsey.  I don’t blame you for anything that Nicole said to me.  Lauri told me what happened between you guys and I know that’s why she asked you to hang out with me.  I appreciate it, I do, but you don’t have to pretend anything.  I’ve known you for what, a whole 2 hours?  You don’t owe me anything.  And I don’t want you feeling bad for me.  I’ll get through this, just like I get through everything else, I told him as I continued to smoke my cigarette. 

Karen, he said as he extinguished his cigarette in the ashtray, I don’t feel bad for you.  I mean, I do feel bad about what happened with you and your boyfriend, and I do feel bad that you had to deal with Nicole, but I don’t feel bad for you.  Yes, you’re right.  We’ve only known each other for a whole two hours, but in that short time, I can tell that you’re a beautiful, funny, smartass who I enjoy spending time with.  And I’d like to spend more time with you. 

Ramsey, I interrupted. 

No Karen.  I don’t want to spend time with you because Lauri asked me to, but because I want to.  I find you intriguing and I want to learn more about you. 

What do you want to learn?  What a day in the life of an ugly loser is like? I tried to be sarcastic but my pain was obvious. 

Nicole is a bitch and I hope you aren’t taking anything she said to heart, he said lighting another cigarette, as I put mine out.  I don’t think you’re an ugly loser, I think you’re really pretty. 

I let him continue. 

You’re not like any other girl I’ve met.  Usually girls throw themselves at me, but not you.  Why is that? he asked. 

I don’t know you, Ramsey.  I’m not very outgoing with guys that I don’t know, I answered. 

Would you like to know me? 

Holy shit, I didn’t know what to say.  On one hand, I was just getting over a horrific breakup that left my heart in a million pieces.  Was I ready to start getting to know another guy on a romantic level, or would he just be my rebound?  Or on the other hand, maybe he was just talking about having sex.  I had only had sex with David and I definitely loved having sex with him, but was that only because I trusted him and was comfortable with him?  But I’m sure I would really enjoy having sex with Ramsey too.  Oh my God, why am I even thinking about this?  He probably just wants to be friends.  Thank goodness he couldn’t read my mind. 

He broke the silence. 

Hey Kid, what are you thinking?  Talk to me.  If you don’t want me to bother you, I won’t, but you gotta talk to me. 

Yeah, Ramsey, I’d like to get to know you better, but I’ve been through enough this past month.  I don’t need, nor do I want to deal with psycho ex girlfriends.  That’s just not on my agenda this summer. 

I get it, I do.  I can promise you that Nicole will never bother you again. I won’t even let her get close to you.  How about we just hang out and get to know each other.  We can take things as they come.  What do you think? 

It was the oddest proposition ever made to me, but I was very intrigued, so I said, Ok, I’m in. 

Cool, now let’s start over.  What do you want to do today?  Pool or beach? he asked. 

Ugh, did he really want to go back to the pool?  As much as I didn’t want to go back there, I figured that I’d take his word for it that he wouldn’t let Nicole near me again.  So, once again, I said, Pool then beach. 

He smiled his familiar smile and replied with, I like it.  Let’s go.  He walked around the room and blew out all of the candles that were lit, as I got my towel and bag together again.  I grabbed my orange key and slipped it in my bag before heading to the door.   

Ready, he asked as he held one hand out to mine, the other turning the door knob. 

Letting a deep breath out I said, Ready as I’ll ever be, as the door slammed shut behind us. 

Hand in hand, he once again led us down the long hallway, down the stairs, and finally to that damn white gate.  We stood there a minute and surveyed the scene, looking to see if Nicole was in sight.  When there was no visible sign of her, Ramsey looked at me and said, The coast is clear. 

I smiled as he opened the gate and led us through.  He walked us over to where we were earlier, right to his friends.  Most of them were gone, but some were still there, Billy being one of them.  He watched us as we approached, hand in hand, and said, What’s this?  I didn’t expect to see you two together again. 

Shut up asshole, Ramsey told him. 

Calm down, bro.  I’m just kidding.  What are you guys here for?  Round two? 

What do you mean? Ramsey asked. 

Nicole’s over there by the pool.  Come for another standoff, Karen? Billy snickered. 

My stomach dropped as I looked around and finally spotted her sitting on the edge of the pool, with a red plastic cup in her hand.  Her legs were opened and in between them, a blonde haired, blue eyed beefcake.  He seemed to be making her laugh, and she hadn’t seemed to notice us.  I was more than grateful for that. 

I couldn’t do this again.  I didn’t want to do this again.  As I started to turn in the direction of the exit, Ramsey grabbed my arm. 

You’re not going anywhere.  I told you that I will not let her get near you, and I won’t.  She will not bother you, Kid.  Please trust me. 

Air filled my lungs and I exhaled another deep breath.  I wanted to stay there with him, I really did, and I did believe that he would protect me to some extent.  And since I felt like a dog that everyone had kicked while it was down, I’m sure I could endure another tongue lashing, so I decided to stay. 

Ramsey quickly pulled off his shirt and hat and threw them on a chair.  He once again, kicked off his sneakers and placed them by his other belongings.  I wasn’t as animated about taking my clothes off this time around.  I had on a simple sundress so I just slipped it off.  My hair was already down and wet, so it was too heavy for the sexy swish.  I flicked off my flips and told Ramsey that I was ready. 

He gave me a once over and his eyes moved down to my belly ring.  He touched it as he said, I like this. 

Thanks, it’s pretty new.  I was thinking about taking it out.  You know, bad memories and all.  

His hand still on my navel, he said, Don’t take it out.  Number one, it’s ridiculously sexy.  And number two, keep it as a reminder, not of the bad memories that come with it, but of how you’ve overcome them. 

I just smiled at him.  He smiled back as he moved his hand from my stomach to grab my hand. 

Let’s go, he said. 

I was more of a let me get my feet wet kind of girl when it came to going in a pool.  I wasn’t for just jumping in, and figured that that’s what Ramsey had in mind when he walked us right behind Nicole, and to the ledge of the deepest part of the pool.   

Now, standing on the edge of the pool hand in hand, Nicole spotted us.  We were practically right next to her when she chuckled, Well if it isn’t the happy couple.  The guy who