The Enduring of the Lovely Star

By James Outis

Three teenagers portraying their view of the world. Ariana, John, and Eddie speak through their mind, and thoughts, as the reader uncovers their past life, personalities and distinct stories. All, of course, told in their perspective.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Lulu.com
• Release date: Feb 25, 2014
• ISBN: 9781312087903

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The Enduring of the Lovely Star

The Enduring  of the Lovely Star

James Outis

Copyright

This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents, are either the product of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons,   living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is   entirely coincidental.

The Enduring of the Lovely Star

Copyright © 2014 by James Outis

All rights reserved. Without limiting the rights under copyright reserved above, no part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means (electronic, mechanical,

photocopying, recording, or otherwise) without the prior written

permission of the copyright owner of this book.

Printed in the United States of America

First Edition

ISBN: 978-1-304-79985-2

Dedication:

TO YOU

Quote:

IT'S NOT WHAT HAPPENS TO YOU,

BUT HOW YOU REACT TO IT THAT MATTERS.

-EPICTETUS

The Enduring of the Lovely Star

Have you ever hid an objectfrantically, so the footsteps right behind you could never find it?

This is similar. Except I hide myself.

Chapter One:

Ariana Potens

I'm a good actress.

I just find it easy to control my emotions. I'm used to making up lies.

Not for myself though. Just so others won't get hurt.

I guess some people don't agree with me there. Like the Russian proverb, It's better to be slapped by the truth than kissed by a lie. But those lies are me and my actions towards myself. They are no one's business. And if my mistakes would cause others to be extremely hurt, then I think I have a right to hide them. I would not care if they knew every detail about me, as long as they wouldn't hurt.

Honestly, the lies have nothing to do with others. My lies are mine. They have to do with me and my life.

The reason the lies would hurt others is because they indirectly caused it. That's all it is, indirect, but it's the only explanation I could give them. They'll feel guilty.

And I can't do that.

I can't break anyone, especially the way I was broken.

And I act all the time, during my day. That doesn't mean I'm fake. It's not like I'm the complete opposite. But sometimes, acting helps. Especially when someone thinks they've figured you out.

Or when I need to burst out crying. Acting saves me from that.

* * *

School takes most of my energy. I almost always have to act, and it disgusts me.

Everyday, I'm exhausted and argue why I didn't sleep earlier last night. It's almost as if my life sucks the life out of me. Can it?

I walk down the hallways, trying to stop all the people from filling me up with old memories. If I let, all those memories would haunt me. As if they already didn't.

So I continue walking, laughing, and loving. Everyone loves me. Because I love them.

I never think of myself, simply because the thought burns. So for them, I'm humble. I don't feel humblethough. Quite the opposite, I'm selfish.

* * *

I don't know why, but when I feel this way, everything is only a dream. I just act my way through my life, in a state of denial. Memories flash back at me, but I'm numb. I feel nothing. I'm untouchable.

Lana, my best friend, catches up with me. Hey.

Lana is skinny, with brown eyes and hair. She seems too quiet and reserved. But not with me. She's hilarious, sweet, and dramatic. I love her.

I give her a tight hug and wait for a story. Lana always has new stories.

You'll never believe what happened! Okay, so you know my cousin, Alina. . .

Listening, I turn to give ten other people hugs and sit down at the benches. I realize something.

I'm not any different from them. The entire audience is acting, too.

Lana Amica

Ariana pulls away, looking distracted again. She's hard to understand.

What's your next class? I ask.

She seems to pull out of her daydream. English.

She scrunches her nose.

I don't know what she's complaining about, she's great in English.

We hug and move on to our separate ways.

* * *

I forgot to do the homework! Ugh, not again. . .

I don't want to take Spanish.

I'm not going to class.

I'm going to go to the counselor right now and demand to get out. God, I've been learning this language since seventh grade and I hardly know, Hello.

There! Someone smiled like him. That weird half-smile. It was pretty cute, though.

It's incredible how random people can look like someone so completely different.

Their face changes and—boom—here come all the memories you don't want to think about.

No, I'm not going to think about it. Not thinking about it. Nope. He moved away. He's gone.

God, he's stupid.

John Amasio

I spot Eddie and slap his back. He shoots me the You're-annoying-and-just-messed-up-everything look. He's talking with a girl. A better choice of words is flirting.

He brushes me off.

I stand there, behind the girl, trying to mock her. But obviously failing because Eddie's use of words are hilarious.

Ariana walks out the door.

God, would it be okay to just kiss her? I almost lean in to her whenthe memory freezes it all.

Eddie punches me directly on a bruise.

"Damn, John, I told you, Sarah likes me. And I might like her."

I laugh and shove his shoulder. "You might? Haha, how are the rest of the girls?"

Eddie shrugs but answers, Pretty marvelous.He points to the direction Sarah went.

I notice Ariana has walked away, with a guy hanging on her shoulder. She's laughing. With a smile unlike anything or anyone. Honestly.

I grab Eddie into a headlock and we set out, fighting. Like animals.

I can't just talk to her. I'm a pretty quiet person. I hardly say what I think to others. I wish I could just blurt out to everyone exactly what I wanted to. But, then again, who would listen?

* * *

Ey, man! What's wrong? Some girl reject you?

Eddie is in his annoying state. I give him a punch.

Whoa, John, just tell me who she is! I'll get her for you.He smirks.

Mocking Eddie, I flip my hair.  I just got too many girls wanting me. I can't decide. Eddie laughs and gives me a high-five.

And that is exactly when I notice Ariana, turning her neck slightly, and scrunching her nose.

I lower my hand, and with no warning, my face changes.

And that's when Eddie sees it.

* * *

Dude, just talk to her.

No.

Come on! It's just a girl.

No.

John, I swear, if you don't, I will!

It's not like she'll like you anyway.

"Ugh! No, I mean I'd tell her exactly what you're too scared—"

Oh, sure. I'll tell Louisa Mentior you think she's cute.

"Please, please. No, oh my God, last time she wouldn't stop talking for three hours!"

We laugh, remembering Louisa's screeching voice.

Yeah, she's hot, but she's so. freaking. annoying.

We both enter Mr. Sherri's classroom. He's nice, but that's because we control him.

* * *

Mr. Amasio and Mr. Comés.

Eddie and I shut up. That's not Mr. Sherri.

The instant embarrassment fills up. Of course, so does the relief of having a substitute.

Gentlemen, you are late. Do this again and you will both serve detention. Understood?

We nod, sitting in our seats.

As for disturbing the class, Mr. Comés you shall sit next to Miss Louisa Mentior. And Mr. Amasio you will have the pleasure of sitting next to Miss Ariana Potens. I will not tolerate any more disruptions. Understood?

Eddie silently smirks.

My stomach flips.

* * *

Man, English was pretty interesting, huh? Eddie is still smirking. He saw right through you.

I shake my head.

Eddie laughs and does a little dance. Dude, he put you next to Ariana. He knows.

"Then does that mean you like Louisa? 'Cause he put you straight to her."

Ugh, just shut up. Eddie chugs down his drink. He wipes the water from his chin and smirks once again.

Come on, bro. Tell her.

I don't think so. I mean, what about the—

You gotta let that go.

I don't say, but that's impossible.

Aren't we great for watching?

Just to look at, to see, to observe

our specifics: handwriting, walk, smile.

Chapter Two:

Ariana

"Could people change?

There's a distinction between habits and personality.

Habits do not change without an extreme reason or cause. Personalities change every day, every second. For example, you may like a color today, but change your mind. Your favorite singer changes. Your favorite food. Your likes and dislikes change. Get it?

But habits usually don't change. If tugging on your shirt because you're shy or nervous is a habit, it turns to one subconsciously done, unknowingly. It's difficult to change that.

So, ultimately, people do change everyday. But habits don't.

It is possible for a person to be fully changed. Honestly, the cause of that is love. Either the presence or the absence.

And what's behind love?

God.

What I'm saying is that it is possible to be a whole new person. The outcome just depends whether it is with or without God."

That's from Veritatem, a book with a mirror of all my thoughts poured into different combinations of twenty-six letters. Or simply put: it's a book.

The bell drones through my senses. I slowly close the book, annoyed that I couldn't read more.

Through the doors, I notice him. He's just punched Eddie.

Shaking my head, I stuff in my highlighter. The pain on my spine stings as I throw my backpack over.

Whatever, it'll stop if you don't think about it.

I feel his eyes on me. Or maybe I'm wishing they were. I look straight ahead, blinding myself from his corner.

Just a couple more seconds.

A friend hugs me, and feeling the excitement pass through me, I squeeze his hand.

He tells me a secret. Actually, it's some new gossip he's heard about himself. This always makes me smile. My laugh seems extremely dry and raw. It's been too long since I'd laughed that way. He puts his hand over my shoulders and we walk away.

I notice John and Eddie playing around.

My smile drops a tiny bit.

* * *

Mr. Magistor is speaking of the comparison between the monster in Frankenstein (Or is