A Soul Made of Cinders

By Faith Larson

This novel switches between the violent unwinding of Noah, a serial killer who seeks to teach a moral truth, and the unfurling romantic and personal life of Mary Paulson, a woman who realizes that she has lived her whole life and relationships simply going through the motions. After Mary is protected from her drunken boyfriend by a mysterious stranger on Halloween night, she pursues a friendship with her savior, which turns into more. As her life begins to fall into place, Mary starts to confront the issues she has pushed to the back of her mind and grow into the person she wants to be. Meanwhile, in a series of slasher style flashbacks, we learn more about a deadly suitor that Mary has no idea exists. With a dark and twisted ending, this story brings questions to mind that the reader would not normally face. What is the meaning of evil? Or rather, what would you do if you found out evil wanted you?

• Language: English
• Publisher: Faith Larson
• Release date: Oct 1, 2020
• ISBN: 9781005995324

Book preview

Prologue: A Beginning

Noah was only ten when he killed for the first time. It was an accident. He had been trying out his shiny new bicycle. It had been a gift for his birthday, and he was going faster than his parents would have allowed if they had known about it. As he was zipping down the inclined slope of the road, the boy’s head snapped up just in time to hear the dull, wet crunch of bone connecting with a tire. This momentary distraction was just enough to send his body flipping over the handles and crashing into the grass of a nearby neighbor’s lawn.

Nobody on the street was outside at the time, which was extremely lucky for Noah Patterson. After a moment of confusion, his nerves kicked in, and he howled in pain, rolling over onto his back and wiping a frustrated hand at his eyes. His hand came away bloody from a minor cut, which led to more tears of self-pity. It took him a full minute before he remembered what had happened. Slowly he sat up, careful of his bruised elbows, and turned towards the carnage.

There was a mess a yard from his toppled bike, a thick smear of blood leading a full foot until it reached a mangled smudge of black fur and crushed organs. It appeared to have possibly been a cat. The face was unrecognizable, but the body belonged to that of a small, young animal. Noah stared at the shape for several seconds. His expressions morphed quickly: first, that of surprise, disgust, and then lastly, curiosity. He had never seen a corpse before, outside of movies or comic books he hid under his mattress. Pushing himself to his feet, he looked around for witnesses. There were none, so he crept closer to the feline and squatted down next to it. It had definitely passed on, probably on impact. He prodded it with a twig and shuddered as the stick passed through the stomach cavity with minor effort.

What surprised Noah the most about this entire ordeal was that he felt nothing for the creature. It was dead, sure, but it was its own fault for not looking before it stepped out. Despite how he felt, he knew the owner would not be as passive. Shrugging off his small gray hoodie, he placed it over the animal and pulled it off the sidewalk, bundling the little lump in his arms. There was a clearing in the woods behind the houses, a perk of living in a suburban farmland area, which had enough trees to hide the evidence.

He pushed his bike off the sidewalk behind some bushes before running to the shelter of the makeshift forest. Noah tossed the bundle into a knee-high pile of weeds before running back to his bike. He had mounted his bike for the return trip when he noticed that he had missed a streak of blood. It had transferred from his palm to the silver handlebars. The reality of what he had done came crashing down on him, and his brow furrowed in confusion. Was that what all the adults were scared of? Death, which had been a distant concept for him before, had sprung to life in one quick moment.

Noah realized he was hungry. He pushed off for home.

Chapter One

God, are you trying to yank all my hair out?

Julia leaned a hand against Mary’s forehead, the woman’s expertly shaped eyebrows knitting together in concentration. Her other hand shakily inched the silver tweezer closer to Mary’s eyes, which twitched in response. I’m not an expert at this, okay? I’m just following the shape that’s already there, she explained dryly.

Teressa looked up from her phone and let out a snort. Better check the mirror, Mary, while you still have some eyebrows left. The blonde snatched the tweezers away from her friend at this remark and chucked them across the room. Go fetch.

Hey! Julia yelped, before laughing along. Alright, maybe I needed that.

Girls! There was a sharp knock before Julia’s mother poked her head through the doorway. She was a small, stout woman, yet she had a presence that immediately brought them to their best behavior. Do you want anything from the store? I’ll be back in about twenty minutes.

We’re okay, Mom, Julia replied.

I’ll see you girls later then. Her mother left, and after a moment of listening to her footsteps fade away, their excited chatter started up again.

So, I have marvelous news, Teressa said. She sat up and leaned forward on her palms.

We all know I’m on my last year in college to get my Bachelor’s—but guess who got approved to Harvard Medical School to finish her medical degree!

Oh shit, no way! Julia threw herself at her friend, knocking her back down on the bed in a bear hug. When did you get all smart with your big-ass brain?

Mary scrambled to join them, and soon, her friend was squished tightly between two rows of arms.

It feels like just yesterday we graduated from high school, Mary said. I can’t believe it’s been over three years.

You guys are the only friends I have left from school, Julia said, pushing herself up enough to let her friend breathe. No homo, by the way. She looked down at her friend, whom she was half straddling at the moment.

All the homo, Teressa replied. All those girls were fake bitches anyway. Besides you guys, of course.

They moved off their friend and let her sit up again.

But seriously, I’m going to miss you guys. Promise you’ll Skype me every night?

Mary smiled and held out her pinky to Julia. They hooked fingers.

Sure, just until you get popular and forget all about us, Mary said teasingly.

Teressa put a hand to her chest in mock surprise. What? Me? I don’t have time to make more friends. It’s all studying from here on out, amigos. Y’all can just leave this instant and leave my sorry ass alone to my textbooks and ramen noodles.

Julia laughed. You’ll figure out some way to make those noodles pass for a five-star dish with your background. Teressa’s mother was a private chef for a wealthy family, which had left them sitting pretty. They lived in a five-bedroom house in the city,

yet neither of her best friends felt envious.

The girls had been friends since middle school, back when Teressa had been the one in the lowest economic class. She had never let the sudden wealth change her and opted for sensible shoes and thrifting with her friends instead of designer brands at designer prices.

Teressa was the all-around girl next door.

In contrast, there was Julia. She was one of the guys, although she’d never say that. Her outfits were comprised of cargo shorts, baggy graphic tees, and a steady stream of loose braids and ponytails, yet men never complained. Julia was easy to get along with and didn’t mind eating greasy, cheap food. This led to her being asked out on many dates, although the relationships never lasted for long.

Lastly, there was Mary. She wore jeans and plain shirts, brushed her hair once and then left it alone, and rarely opted for makeup. Yet, she exuded the most traditional femininity of the group. She was quiet and modest, yet she was known for her cheerfulness and ability to liven up a dull situation. Mary had an ordinary face, yet she wasn’t unattractive.

She had a freshness about her that drew people in. The most enamoring trait about Mary was that she was unaware of all of this.

Teressa checked the time on her phone before letting out an exaggerated groan and standing up. It’s time, ladies, somebody needs to make me presentable.

Mary pulled her purse off the ground and riffled through it before pulling out a small, silver bag. Julia snatched it from her before pouring the contents out on the desk. Several compact makeup items rolled out with a soft thud.

Teressa cringed. I still don’t trust that makeup shit. There’s no way smearing chemicals on my skin isn’t going to do some wack shit.

Relax, Julia replied, picking out a few signature items before turning back towards her friend. I’ll prime your skin first so it won’t even touch your pores.

Mary looked up from her phone quickly. I didn’t bring primer. I was in a rush…

Teressa took a deep, exaggerated breath before sitting down at the desk. Whatever. Do your magic, she said.

Five minutes later, Teressa had a full face of makeup. After a tentative glance in the mirror, she shrieked with excitement and jumped up. It’s fucking beautiful, she laughed.

You make a convincing cat, Mary said.

Teressa turned back to the mirror and eyed the makeshift whiskers Julia had drawn on her face with eyeliner. Paired with a smokey eye and heavy red lipstick, she looked like a model. If you ignored the cat aspects.

She adjusted her cat ears and stood up in an exaggerated motion. Your turn, Mary, she said with an extravagant wave. Promise we’ll be gentle.

Mary smiled shyly and sat down.

What look are we going for today? Julia asked, brandishing the makeup like a weapon.

I’ll be the one person without a costume, so just make me look hot.

Soon after, the girls were ready. Julia was a Native American, a costume choice sure to cause controversy. Teressa was a sexy cat, except she wore sensible pants instead of a miniskirt. Mary wore a gray sweater with some jeans and a hummingbird necklace her mother had given her for her eighteenth birthday. She hadn’t found a costume she liked in time, and while Mary felt underdressed, she didn’t enjoy dressing up much anyway. Costumes had never been her thing; growing up, she had always had an irrational fear of Halloween, and a lingering sense of it had stuck with her through the years.

When is Tyler getting here? Julia asked Mary impatiently, fiddling with the tassel hem of her skirt. We should be there already. Mama needs some alcohol.

Mary pulled her phone out of her pocket and checked her notifications. He said he was on his way twenty minutes ago, she answered. He’ll be here any second.

The girls sat in silence on the living room couch until the doorbell rang a few minutes later.

Finally. Julia groaned. Tell that boy he owes you some serious head.

Don’t be vulgar, Mary replied. She swung the door open and Tyler swooped in, picking her up in a bone-crushing hug that left her gasping for breath.

There’s my girl. He swooned. He smelled of weed, which wasn’t uncommon, yet Mary still found it unpleasant. She wrinkled her nose slightly but contained herself from chastising him in front of her friends. It hadn’t worked before anyway.

Our knight in denim armor has arrived! Teressa cheered, vaulting off the couch and meeting them at the door.

Sorry, I stopped to get gas, Tyler replied sheepishly.

Teressa raised an eyebrow as his scent hit her. Yeah, I’m sure you did, big guy.

Julia waltzed up to them and ushered them out. Can we just fucking go already?

###

The noise was earsplitting.

Bass vibrations shook the entire house, although few of the partygoers minded the noise.

They were all far too drunk for that. Kevin Durant’s house was just far enough away from his neighbor’s that it didn’t warrant a police call. That was one of the few enjoyable things about living in the suburbs. Almost everybody their age was there, and after circling the area for a good ten minutes, Tyler gave up and parked in a small clearing by the surrounding woods.

Mary forced back the familiar paranoia she felt on this night and stepped out of the crowded car, ignoring her friend’s excited chatter. Her eyes settled on the house with an uneasy stare. Crowds mingled around the ample entryway, with more visible through the wall-length windows. It looked like somebody had set up a strobe light.

Her stomach lurched, and she leaned against the hood of Tyler’s car. Her social anxiety was flaring up, yet she forced herself to pretend this was no big deal. Tyler was into parties, and so were her friends. She didn’t want to be a downer. Tyler snaked a hand around her waist, lower on her hip than she cared for.

It really sucks you didn’t want a costume. We could have matched like these other couples. He gave her a look that made it clear he would be pissed about it the whole night. Mary thought he was cute, yet too temperamental sometimes. Since she had turned down his offer, he had bought a sad-looking cheap mask for a form of revenge. It was clear he wanted her to feel bad for it, as he slid the grinning skull face on and headed in quickly,

forcing her to walk faster to avoid bruising on her hip.

I’m sorry, Mary replied absently, I didn’t find anything I liked. People parted to let them in, probably more out of fear of Tyler’s wrath than anything. He wasn’t a violent guy mostly, but he played on the local community college’s football team and had a reputation for a mean tackle.

They had barely made it into the entrance before one of Tyler’s best friends since middle school barreled over and wrapped him in a tight bear hug. The smell of overpowering body spray now mixed with alcohol.

I’m so glad you made it. Jessie clapped him on the back while he ended the hug. I was tiring of beating everybody at beer pong. He turned to Mary and made an apologetic bow. Do you mind if I steal him for a bit?

Mary minded, but she didn’t want to be that girlfriend. No, go ahead, she replied softly, turning back into the pulsing crowd as they left. She recognized a few people from high school. Most of the crowd wore masks in honor of Halloween. It was jarring since most of the men wore masks from various horror franchises. She squeaked in surprise as Michael Myers bumped into her arm, the teenager behind the mask laughing before pushing past.

The whole house was decorated with convincing decorations from Halloween Outlet, and cheesy or not, the place looked good.

The strobe light (Here came a migraine) lit up the faces of plastic skeletons that had been mounted on the walls. It felt like all the decorations were staring at her, and Mary’s heart quickened as she pushed her way out of the living room and towards the less crowded kitchen. Teressa was there, filling a red cup up with tequila and flirting with a confused, scrawny boy. He looked like he was still in high school. Mary decided he could fend for himself and took a warm soda off of the counter, slipping back into the living room unnoticed.

She bumped into a few people, but everyone was in too good of a mood to care. The music switched to a heavy metal song, but enough complaints echoed out that it was turned back to dubstep. Her growing headache protested. She looked around for a spot to sit, settling on the corner of a stained couch that had been pushed to the side of the room. Mary only had a second to relax before a couple crashed next to her and started making out within an inch of her face.

Come on, man, Mary complained, jumping up and letting them have the whole couch.

The drunk girl flipped her the bird. Mary cursed under her breath and shoved her way back outside. After this was over, she would have a severe talk with Tyler. He couldn’t keep taking her to parties and abandoning her. Giving out candy to kids at home would have been more fun, plus they always played vintage horror films on TV around that time.

She pushed her way out the front door and inhaled the crisp night air with a deep sigh.

It was mostly empty outside, excluding a few people there for the same reason she was.

Mary leaned against the front porch and checked her phone. Teressa had texted to tell her not to wait up, she was getting a ride home. Mary figured it was that high schooler from earlier. She looked up at the sky, studying the constellations that twinkled above her. The clearing they were in had a perfect view of the night. It was breathtaking, yet nobody else seemed to care. A wave of sadness hit Mary as she watched the stars. She felt like she had nothing in common with anybody in this place.

Not that she felt better than them; the opposite really. She just couldn’t enjoy half the things her friends enjoyed. Tyler was even worse than her friends. Every time she suggested something for a date, he’d call her ideas lame. He thought he was being cute. It didn’t come across that way. Mary suffered through baseball games, football practice, and terrible action movies with no plot. She wondered why they were still together sometimes. They had dated in high school, and there was never a serious problem. As far as Mary knew, he loved her, and while he was scary sometimes, he had never raised a hand against her.

Once, a long time ago, she had asked what he saw in her. Tyler said she was dependable.

So that’s what it all boiled down to. She was predictable and loyal, like a puppy.

Her phone vibrated, drawing her out of the moment. Tyler wanted her to meet him in the kitchen. She drew in a deep breath and pushed off the fence. The sadness stuck with her as she forced her way back through the pulsing, shouting crowd.

Tyler and Jessie were drunk. Both of them were taking shots of whiskey and laughing at each other as if it was the funniest thing in the world. There were only four more people in the kitchen, so Tyler noticed her instantly.

Babe, come here, he slurred, waving her over.

Jessie had a girl on his arm who cast an appraising look over Mary’s outfit.

No costume? I think she thinks she’s better than us, she joked. Jessie laughed at this lightheartedly, yet a sour expression drifted over Tyler’s face.

Oh, she always has.

Mary’s eyes stung at this, and she shifted her gaze to her fuzzy boots as she approached Tyler.

What do you want? she managed to ask.

I just want you to make a fucking effort, Tyler replied.

Jessie’s girlfriend chuckled uncomfortably. Ouch… Mary cautiously looked up at her boyfriend’s angry face. He was looking at Jessie’s girlfriend and didn’t meet her gaze.

Movement behind his shoulder caught her attention. She made unexpected eye contact. A man was leaning against the wall beside the fridge, opening a beer bottle with his key chain. The bottle popped open, and he took a swig, his eyes drifting away from her and lazily surveying the crowd that had gathered near his secluded corner