Confusion

By Jim Gardner

LONG
As we all know life in today’s world can be difficult. Indeed with the introduction of technology, social etiquette, and a surge of stupid/unworkable rules and regulations; life in today’s world is most assuredly way more dangerous/complicated than that of yesteryear. The more I know covers many issues; both old and new facing us today, be it rules and regulations, racism, the law, gender and its/ her/his attached issues and last but by no means least stupidity! and all done with a sprinkling of humour. Humour not withstanding, the term the more I know, the less I understand is what it says on the tin i.e. recognition that the more we seem to know, the more difficult it is to apply logic. Clearly political correctness is the scourge of modern society. Generally instead of standing up and fighting back we run scared of retribution. Indeed all too often we take a step backwards for fear of recrimination when in actual fact what we need to do is stand up and be counted. Having said that, given the recurring consequences of doing so make this easier said than done; especially, given the downright lunacy and arrogance of those who should know better. If it wasn’t so tragic it would and often is hilariously funny as described in this book, confirming if confirmation was needed that common sense is rarely common.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Jim Gardner
• Release date: May 20, 2020
• ISBN: 9780463909119

Jim Gardner

height5/9; weight 80k; balding i have no children. I have been in business for 20 yrs during which I have owned around six companies at one stage or another. These days I live with my long term partner.I Started to scribble around 15 yrs ago. To date I have written 4 books. 2 of the books have been as a ghost writer and the other 2 are about my ideas, observations and my views

Book preview

PART FOUR

61 me man! You WOMAN! 66 End of the world 2

62Foreign aid 67 End of the world 3

63 Millenniums/Graduates 68 End of the world 4

64 Read all about it 69 Daily Mail Comment

65 End of the world 1 70 Recycling/on your bike

71 It’s a fact/ strange but true

Chapter 1

Freedom of Speech/ Make up your Mind

The encyclopaedia describes Freedom of Speech as 'individuals having the right to articulate an opinion, without fear of government retaliation, or censorship’. Freedom of Expression, on the other hand is sometimes used synonymously with the inclusion that any act seeking, receiving and imparting information or ideas, regardless of medium used.

Three hundred and fifty years ago, a Dutch philosopher suggested ‘every man may think what he likes and say what he thinks!’ Well these days apparently not. If, as George Orwell proclaimed ‘liberty means having the right to tell people, what they don't want to hear’ then we my friend, are quite frankly, in the shit!

In today’s world people seem intent to find offence on what others say at every cut and turn, in their quest to suppress anything resembling controversial.

For example, if, while dining with my wife and friends someone dare to utter a perceived controversial opinion, within the privacy of our table, then the chances are someone within listening distance may be inclined to take issue and perhaps even have the temerity to interrupt and question the statement/s, even though we are quietly engrossed in what I would term a private discussion, albeit in a public place.

Clearly hate speeches, lies, threats etc are not protected by the United Kingdom or the 1st Amendment of the US Constitution.

Regulations, as with everything in life, are imperative. Freedom of speech doesn't literally mean freedom of speech! Freedom of speech comes with conditions. For example; screaming 'the Pope is a pervert' '(although perhaps factual) doesn't mean you can go around proclaiming you want to kill him! This is not freedom of speech. This is a proclamation of intent to murder. Likewise announcing you wish to kill Hilary Clinton or ‘The Donald’ is, with regards to freedom of speech most definitely off the table.

So, although People have a right to say whatever they want to say in private, it would appear we must tread wearily when we go public. You may not like some of the opinions people voice, or the words that they use, but this is absolutely no reason to have the government trample people's natural rights.

‘Death threats’ are not a form of free speech, they are a threat. Calling a soldier; who has never done anything than serve his country in good faith a ‘Murderer! Is defamation of character? If you utter that to someone who is being tried or investigated for murder, it becomes a grey area. Conversely, if you say that to someone who has been convicted; it’s deemed free speech. Protesting that the government should give amnesty to illegal’s, is an opinion and likely to be termed free speech provided you don't do it on my, or A. N. others private property.

‘Hate speech’ is similar to ‘freedom of speech’ provided the language used does not incite or encourage violence or violation of the law. There is a significant difference in a statement that says, ‘No more blacks’ and "Yes, send us more dead, blacks’.

The first suggests a lack of tolerance and your opinion that there should be no more Blacks. The second shows distinct encouragement for the acceptance of violence against the group being protested. Strange as it may seem, it’s when ‘freedom of speech’ isn't ‘freedom of speech’ that the problems arise. PS Profanity & Sexual suggestions are not free speech.

In summation British law is based on Christianity, ergo should be precisely that. ‘British Christian law’ we are, after all, as it says on the tin British and Christian!

Chapter 2

Boarding School V Poor Man’s Son

I was raised in the Scottish equivalent of the Bronx. Five days of the week saw me rise at 8am, wash in the sink, pull on my glad rags, (including, on occasion the previous day's underpants and socks) eat cornflakes, drink tea after which I’d be handed a grease proof paper, within which, was a sandwich and a biscuit, before being sent packing to school. By 4pm, en route home I was out on the streets kicking a ball and by 5pm I sat down to eat whatever was on my plate.

Given we stayed in a one bed apartment meant sharing the bedroom with my parents. This was achieved by way of a singular curtain running from wall to wall.

The toilet was of the outside variety; that is to say, if anyone in the family needed to go in the middle of the night for example, we simply hauled our asses from bed, slipped on shoes and some covering, lifted the keys and the torch from the hook on the door, before then making our way to the outside toilet, in the sure and certain knowledge that having arrived at the venue, the loo was on the odd occasion engaged! Back then, I figured I had been dealt a bad hand; not so nowadays.

These days, I thank my lucky stars for the way in which I was raised. If nothing else Maw and Paw were around should I, for whatever reason find myself face to face with the boogie man at 3am, while loitering with intent outside a toilet!

This brings me to boarding schools and their effect on the young 9-10year old kids who are whisked off without so much as a second thought. Can you imagine how a 9 or 10 year old feels when, having been bumped outside boarding school with their worldly possessions by their side; they are compelled to wave good bye to Mum and Dad.

Apparently, life in a boarding school is not so dissimilar to life in jail. As one, who, albeit (as a young man) has seen the inside a prison for a few days; I understand the prison thing.

Conversely, having never stepped inside a boarding school, some may say I’m in no position to comment, however one would suspect that depression, control, rules and regulations, anxiety, fear etc, similarly apply to life in both boarding schools and prisons. All of which seems now, the way in which I was raised, was a damn sight better than been packed of to boarding school for months/ years.

The fall trauma of a 10 year old etc being dumped outside a boarding school would, I suspect, be overwhelmingly cruel, not to mention traumatic. Similar to a stint jail; every waking moment in a boarding school is governed by strict rules, without the concessions and all because your parents love you!

Perhaps life with an alcoholic father and a workaholic mother wasn’t all together a bad gig, at least they were always around to chastise me, amid trying to kill one another.

The well-worn cliché ‘It will be the making of the boy/ girl, toughen him/her up’, is (in my humble opinion) bullshit.

Most guys I have met, who attended boarding school remain consumed with resentment and anger when they speak of how their parents packed them off to boarding school by way of getting rid of them, and of them only being reunited occasionally. Don’t the parents realise that in doing so the kids feel like nobody loves them and they are just a nuisance.

These men speak of loneliness and of no one being around to give them a hug or console them when down other than the pervert teacher or the big guy with the big erection lurking in the corridor.

One must agree that to be shipped off to a school where you are, in effect incarcerated would affect one’s perception of a loving Mum and Dad and in its place deep resentment at their parent’s decision to dump them into a boarding school.

Apparently, the parents do it for love, well from where I’m standing perhaps as the song goes ‘they should do anything for love, but they shouldn’t do that! Indeed, if that’s their interpretation of love, god only knows what they figure hate is!

Boarding schools are supposed to be the making of them, both physically and mentally, when in fact it really is a middle/upper class form of child neglect. Let’s face it, on reaching puberty, living 24/7 in a boy/men only environment, one may be inclined to experiment and if one has no access to the female of the species then pray tell what is one to do when surrounded by rampant, hormonal, males of the species!

Chapter 3

Religion/Jesus Christ!

In the name of God

At the beginning of civilisation people typically referred to somebody’s moniker by their parentage, therefore stands to reason Jesus would have most likely been referred to as Jesus son of Joseph or Jesus son of Mary

As we all know, pregnancy begins when a male’s sperm fertilizes a female’s (egg), and the fertilized ovum implants in the lining of the uterus.

Ergo Mary (the virgin) became pregnant when God (apparently) created a sperm cell in her mature egg, after which the egg was released by one of her ovaries and travelled down her Fallopian tube toward the uterus. Because pregnancy changes a woman’s normal hormone patterns, one of the first signs of pregnancy is a missed menstrual period thus when Mary missed her period she realized her pregnancy had already begun.

According to Matthew chapter 1:18-25 the birth of Jesus Christ was as follows: Aged 19 Mary was betrothed to Joseph. However, before they came together, Mary was found to be with child by the Holy Spirit! Husband Joseph, (understandably not best pleased) initially planned to send her away secretly, until an angel of the Lord appeared, in a dream saying, Joseph, son of David do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife, for the child who has been conceived (procreated) in her is of the Holy Spirit. She will bear a Son and you shall call him Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins. And so, being the good guy he undoubtedly was, Joseph on awakening did as the angel of the Lord commanded him and took Mary as his wife, ensuring she remained a virgin, until she gave birth to a Son; after which he named the kid Jesus. NASU

Jumping Jesus

Strange as it may seem, the bible has no record of what Jesus did or where he went between the ages of 12 and 30. Apparently he just vanished into thin air, which given his human Dad was Joseph and his celestial Dad the lord God would not have been difficult.

Nevertheless, son of god or otherwise, the fact remains nobody seems to know where he was, or indeed what he did during those lost years. Much speculation and oodles of theories have since been submitted, however the fact remains, no one actually knows.

One theory is that aged 12 he became an apprentice Carpenter, which given at best an apprentice Carpenter serves 5 years. Beggars the question; ‘where was he between the ages of 17 and 30?’

In those days, Jewish boys attained their manhood at 13, at which point they are forced into marriage. If Jesus had remained in Judea, he would most certainly have been pressed into wedlock, raising the question, did he do a runner, due to the fact he wasn’t into women? Or am I being disrespectfully sacrilegious?

To all Christians out there (of which I am one) please be assured I’m not mocking or being disrespectful. I would nonetheless dearly love to have some sort of closure with respect to where the bold boy disappeared to. Seems to me Inspector Clouseau would have had trouble finding the son of God.

Queensland ( as in The Queens- Land)

A total of 28 European Queens reigned from 1480 to 1913, during which there was a 27 percent increase! In wars compared to that of the reign of a King; it’s true. People have this preconceived notion that states, empires, countries etc led by women actually engaged in less conflict. The Pacific Standard analysis of the data on European Queens suggests another story. In today’s world, it would appear we have as much, if not more conflict with regards to racism and religion than ever before. History however, will confirm this is not the case, many, if not all wars in history were primarily religious power base.

From Attila, the Hun to Genghis Khan to Churchill, they all shared one thing, the quest for power, although with regards to Genghis Khan, his additional claim to fame was fathering between 1000- 2000 kids, which I believe ranks No 1 with regards to fathering the most children ever!

Chapter 4

Pensions/ Nat insurance/Benefits/Housing etc

Let’s begin by discussing National Insurance payments. Over the previous 10/12 years men, (provided they had the required amount of pension credits) retired aged 65 on a tidy little state pension, while woman for whatever reason retired at 60; changed days.

These days, due to an aging population, both men and women, cannot retire now until they are 66 years of age. How come!

More over, if someone has been on the dole since leaving school, why do they receive a pension of sorts?

Likewise immigrants of the ‘aged’ variety; we give them a roof over their heads, sufficient money to make ends meet, free dental treatment and free healthcare. So the question remains, how about a pension. Do they receive such a payment or does it come under the ‘housing benefit/social security’/ charity/ hand outs banner?

Unemployed aged folk with no assets i.e. a home etc are entitled to free nursing home/ dental treatment /NHS etc while people with assets i.e. those who have worked their butts off in order to own a home, or have perhaps a few quid in the bank, are forced to sell otherwise they get fuck all!

With regards to inheritance tax; I.H T is charged at 40% on your total worldwide estate in excess of £325,000. By way of reducing IHT many people give away gifts during their lifetime, the rule being a max of £3000. Others who own a debt free house tend to sell up within 7 years of retiring and in doing so avoid paying anything.

The Young Team

A recent survey suggests that 70% of 22-29 year olds are not putting enough into their pension fund to realise the £23,000 they will need, if they are to enjoy a comfortable retirement

A contribution average by a 21year old of £184 per month will bring them £15.200 per annum. At 25 years of age they need to contribute £293 per month to reach £23.000.

At 35years of age it jumps to £443 per month. A 30year old paying 1% would achieve an income of £9.734.

Tax Credits (would you credit it!)

A small group of Prisoners at Kirk Evington Grange in Stockton on tees discovered a loophole in the system allowing them to receive up to £2,500 pounds in tax credits, which in turn topped up the wages they earned on day release.

Apparently, over 600 inmates are at present eligible for the benefits. and convicts from within the 17 open prisons (where the inmates can go out to work every day) are likely to apply. The only criteria is that the convict must be on a low- wage, complete 30 hours of work per week, pay tax and be 25 years of age or over.

Lest we forget, it costs us the taxpayer £37k per year per rapist/murderer for the food and accommodation of said rapist’s and murderers. Convicts working within prison walls are not entitled to claim the credit, as they don’t pay taxes on the restricted wages earned inside. Question; is it fundamentally wrong for prisoners to be given the same access to benefits as hard-working law-abiding citizens? Think we all know the answer to that one

Point to ponder

Don’t you think you should be entitled to a refund if, having paid into your state pension for years, you die before you have the opportunity of using it?

Same with health care e.g. if you have paid £X/ per month for 40 odd years into private health care and have never needed there assistance, don’t you think you should (if for nothing else good behaviour) receive some sort of refund.

Child benefits (For your information)

(a) Any parent can qualify for child benefit provided they are responsible for 1 or more children under the age of 16

(b) If you qualify, it doesn’t matter if you have 1-2-3-4-5-6 children, you can claim for 6 + payments.

(c) At the time of writing the eldest or only child entitles the parent to £21.05 pounds per week, additional children are entitled to £13.95 pounds per week per child.

(d) If your child is under 12 and you are unemployed you qualify for national insurance credits which, of course goes towards your state pension’ making the U. K a great place to live if you are a lazy son of a gun.

With regards to immigrants, they will also get child benefit if their main home is in the UK and they have permission to live in the UK.

The Scots’ addendum

Have to say, if I was English, Welsh or Northern Irish, I’d be more than a little upset by the fact that the Scots enjoy £1,550 more per head of population in public spending than the rest of the UK. Crazy as it may seem, we Scots are the beneficiaries of this English/ Welsh and Irish generosity

Incredulously, £56 billion was spent north of the border last year i.e. £10,000 for every man, woman and child. Ps; 41% of all the spending goes on (Scottish) social protection otherwise referred to as unemployment benefit!

Pray tell why would the Scots push for independence when, apart from the ridiculously generous funding, a united UK brings with it bigger army, bigger navy and bigger Airforce there’s a lot to be said for the mantra ‘in unity, there is strength

Chapter 5

Better watch out!

We live a stones throw away from a famous port. An area where, of an evening (especially, although not exclusively) the holiday makers/ women descend on the bars dressed like hookers, get slaughtered, flirt outrageously with the first guy they make-eye contact with, after which they will head for the closest lane and get laid!

Perhaps if she is a woman of virtue and he a rich guy, albeit a stranger, she may prefer to go back to his hotel; either way you can bet your bottom dollar they will be getting jiggy.

Come the break of Dawn, she will slip on what needs slipping on, tip toe to the door and vanish. In all likelihood they will go their separate ways, never to meet again and perhaps return home unscathed.

However if I were a betting man I’d put good money on one or the other, having had unprotected sexual intercourse with the stranger and as a result given one or the other a little reminder of their