Funny Meeting You Here: 6 Shorts: The Funny Thing Is..., #1

By Holly Schindler

Cross paths. Bump into. Encounter. Come face-to-face. Three cheers for the happy accident!

 

Oftentimes, the very best part of a story is the section in which the characters meet. The initial spark. The twists of fate. The you'll never believe what happened to me todays. That's what you'll find here: a delightful array of characters—young and old and in-between—meeting for the first time in the most unexpected ways. Six light, humorous, sweet tales of how they came into one another's lives. When you're through, you'll find yourself feeling glad to have spent time with them. Yes, you'll think, thumbing back through the pages, funny meeting them here.

 

Silly and short, a quick read to chuckle through.

• Language: English
• Publisher: InToto Books
• Release date: May 18, 2020
• ISBN: 9781393148463

Holly Schindler

I'm a critically acclaimed and award winning hybrid author for readers of all ages--both the young in years and the young at heart. My work has received starred reviews from Booklist and Publishers Weekly, appeared on Booklist’s Best First Novels for Youth, PW Picks, School Library Journal’s What’s Hot in YA, and B&N’s 2016 YA Books with Irresistible Concepts and Most Anticipated May 2016 YA Books. My YA work has also won a Silver Medal in ForeWord Reviews Book of the Year and a Gold Medal in the IPPY Awards. My MG work is critically acclaimed as well, having made the master lists for several state readers’ awards, including this year’s Oklahoma Sequoyah Book Award and Missouri’s Mark Twain Readers Award, and has been chosen for inclusion in the Scholastic Book Fair.

Book preview

Funny Meeting You Here

Holly Schindler

Funny Meeting You Here

Published by InToto Books

Copyright © 2020 by Holly Schindler

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission of the author, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

Cover design by Holly Schindler

Cover image by Linda Staf, courtesy of Shutterstock

HandsDown font by Telllu & Friends and Baby Brooklyn font by Font Bundles Store, both courtesy of Font Bundles

About This Collection

I wrote these stories as the Coronavirus pandemic was sending us all into isolation. A strange, uncertain time, during which we all (myself included) hungered for some of the most basic human essentials: Contact. Friendship. Camaraderie. The smiling face. The casual wave hello.

I really think the very best part of any tale—short story, novella, or novel—is the point at which the main characters cross paths (the meet cute in romance novel lingo). That first, initial spark. During our weeks of quarantine, isn’t that really what so many of us missed in our own lives? As much as we missed being with our own close circles of friends and relatives, didn’t we also miss the chance to see a few new faces?

During the hardest of times, laughter also becomes more important than ever. As difficult as it is sometimes to find humor, it’s always there, just waiting for us to discover it.

That’s what drove me to the keyboard. As I was isolating, what gave me comfort was writing short tales in which two characters really do nothing more than meet. That’s what you’ll find here: funny, sweet, lighthearted first encounters. Stories of how two characters get together. How their paths initially cross. At times, we find the promise of romance in these pages. But we find the beginnings of friendships here, too.

There’s no telling what the next few weeks and months will hold, regarding periods of self-isolation and quarantine. I hope that when this book finds you, regardless of what the world is like just beyond your door, it manages to bring two smiles: one to your face and one to your heart.

—Holly Schindler, May 2020

Barry and the Duchess

Barry worked in a very boring cubicle across from a very green park. On the sunnier days, he plopped on a bench to eat his lunch and forget how truly mind-numbing office work could be.

Seriously. Those park bench visits were the only thing keeping his brain from turning into a half-melted wad of Jell-O.

On a rather bland Tuesday, an absolutely stunning blond, a large dog in tow, sat down beside him.

Now, this is more like it! Barry said to himself. Finally. A Tuesday that had the potential to be something more than ordinary.

Do you like dogs? she asked after they had exchanged some very (to Barry’s initial disappointment) ho-hum pleasantries: Hello. Do you come here for lunch often? Gee-whiz, it’s hot.

Barry did have to admit he raised his brow a bit at the gee-whiz. He hadn’t heard that lingo since the third grade.

Anyway. The blond asked, Do you like dogs? and Barry, feeling a little frisky after hearing that gee-whiz, replied, With mustard and relish!

Barry was not simply attempting to appear clever and charming. He was not simply trying to liven up this tuna casserole of a Tuesday. He was, but he was also telling the truth. He had no place or room in his life for a furry anything.

You’re kidding. The blond’s tone was annoyed. Sarcastic.

Barry’s smile fell.

Well, I need someone to hold this leash. Just for about ten minutes. It’s an emergency, and I thought you looked like someone I could trust. Guess not. And she got up and began looking around.

The thing was, Barry was often referred to by his work pals as a really good guy. Usually with a clap on the back of his shoulder.

He was also, in all honesty, a complete sucker for blonds.

It would truly kill him to be not a good guy in front of a very non-Tuesday kind of blond.

Okay, he said. I’ll do it.

The blond opened her mouth and her eyebrows shot up toward her hairline.

As long as you promise it’ll only be ten minutes. Barry wagged his finger like the tough guy he was not. He checked his watch to remind her that it was, in fact, lunch hour. He had a very boring cubicle to return to! His brain was only forty-five percent coleslaw!

He chuckled to himself every time he thought of his brain as some sort of random food item, slowly growing mold up there in his skull like the old Chinese takeout in the back of his fridge. It often seemed a shame to him to have spent so many challenging years in school—killing himself learning trigonometry and memorizing history and trying to get the hang of so many artistic enterprises (music! art! be well rounded!) all to get to adulthood, where you pretty much spent eight hours every day punching the same three buttons. They fooled a kid into thinking there were all these horizons up ahead, when really, it was some dumb cubicle.

Still. Here he was, and he was staring at a blond, and this Tuesday was beginning to make his brain feel a little bit less like corned beef hash.

"You’re