Indigo

By Daniel Scuderi

How much suffering can one man take before he becomes more than that of a man? Would he break, or become something more? Told through the first-person perspective of our blind protagonist Louie, his story begins seemingly at every end he's come to in his life. Growing up in a world he can't remember, the one he's living in, along with the rules, keeps changing. Unable to tell the difference between dream and reality, a blind man's dreams merge his reality. Without her, he falls deep in the eerie and disturbing cracks of life questioning the duality of love and of God. Through the guidance of a shape-shifting being, he conquers his demons, leaving him that of the one thing he once feared. When he reaches Purgatory, is that what he once seeks at the end? A modern interpretation of the Divine Comedy.

• Language: English
• Publisher: BookBaby
• Release date: May 9, 2020
• ISBN: 9781098308797

Book preview

©2020 All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

Print ISBN: 978-1-09830-878-0

eBook ISBN: 978-1-09830-879-7

Contents

Devil’s Puzzle

Black and White Love

Flying Stars

Unfamiliar Waters

Her Voices In My Head

Blind Mind

Woodbury

Misplaced Puzzle Pieces

Messenger Not

Father and the Son

Hex

Belphegor

Judgment

Mammon

Duality

Andras

Dogma

Misplaced Admiration, Celebrating Imitation

Disjointed Human Emotion

Schism

Abaddon

Catharsis

Aphrodisiac

Androgyne

Two of Each

Follow The Golden Path

Soul Above Matter

Confession

Eclipse the Skies with Lies

Solve et Coagula

Author’s note

Chapter 1

Devil’s Puzzle

The walls finally spoke. Their echoing screams muffled by its insane maze. Curiosity growing, all their heads sprung up from their fantasy worlds, trying to catch and witness the echoes dissipating, finding themselves lost. Panic rumbled with the walls like enclosed water levels rising. A heart attack, calm at first, soon accented with crescendoing familiars.

The room becoming alive, hellish screams came from outside those walls, curious. Rising from my seat, pushing my chair back, the walls spoke again, it’s language, incomprehensible. Bodies crowded around the windows, the librarian rushing to the doors, locking top and bottom.

Quiet! Everyone underneath your desks now! The librarian ordered.

Bodies coward under desks looking at the librarian rushing back to his desk, picking up the phone on his desk, dialing on the keypad.

Yes, my name is Michael Pearl, the school librarian at Creation High School, there is a shooting in progress please send help!

Muffled voices came over the phone.

Yes, around ten kids, I’ve secured the doors, please hurry! Thank you.

He hung up the phone standing behind his desk.

The police are on their way, everyone stay—

A startling bang met the locked doors bringing the silence back. We were left waiting, our stares, wide-eyed locked on the door. Seeing a shadow from underneath the doors, a silhouette stood in the doorway, peering through the blurred glass windows. Nearly impossible to see us, I felt eyes staring directly at me. The silhouette stood there endlessly before, it vanished. The silhouette walked away leaving us, a predator showing mercy for its prey. Hints of whispered footsteps grew distant until there were none left. The librarian slowly stood from behind his desk walking hesitantly to the doors. Peering through the glass windows, he placed his ear to the door. A sigh of relief came off his shoulders turning his back to the door.

I think he’s—

The loudest scream erupted from the door, sending shards of wood and glass everywhere. The librarian sprung forward, his chest ripped open from the inside, forcing him to the ground in a mangled mess. Screams erupted from underneath the desks as ear ringing shots pierced the four corners of the door.

Quickly rising to my feet, I rushed behind the bookshelves, my back against them. I tried holding back tears when the doors were breached. Looking forward, I was frozen. Scattering footsteps followed screams. Shots went off silencing one scream at a time, hearing bodies fall. Voices screamed, pleading out.

Please, no!

Don’t do this!

All their prayers answered with silence, the ringing growing more and more deafening. Before I knew it, the room was back to normal. Quiet. Calm. How it should be. Footsteps approaching me sounded like they started from miles away with grueling patience. Slow, growing footsteps came closer. I couldn’t bring myself to move. I wasn’t scared. It had become fear. The footsteps stopped, feeling the silhouette’s presence next to me. I never looked away. A muzzle met the corner of my eye, reaching out to me. I stared at death, seeing the spaces between the books lining the shelves, peering into endless blurred aisles. It stared back when I heard a click, bringing it into focus. I saw beauty. Collected tears fell down my cheek as the muzzle slowly lowered. Footsteps started but, never ended, hearing them grow ever distant. I was alone… Scared again.

Turning my head, peering through the shelves bodies laid lifeless coating the desks and floors. Back against the bookshelf, I looked down seeing my hands shaking. Confused, I came out from behind, the room blurred. My hands growing out of focus, the room lay quiet, blood painting the walls. Children’s bodies lay vacant. And, there I was. Left only to witness his hellish aftermath. I was amongst the devil’s presence, a witness spared only to decipher his message left behind.

A Swat team stormed the room, guns drawn at me.

Are you alone? A voice asked.

I was stuck in slow motion, as the group approached me.

I don’t know, I said.

Did you see where he went?!

I pointed at the door, as the group split up clearing the aisles.

Library’s clear, extract remaining survivors off the campus.

The group quickly continued down the halls as police officers rushed in approaching me.

Hey, it’s alright, we’re here to help okay? An officer said, slowly approaching me like a stray dog.

My name is officer Robert Greaves, are you hurt? He asked, offering his hand out to me.

N-n no. I murmured.

Can you walk?

Y- yes.

Great, now let’s get chu out of here okay?

I placed my hand in his, a smile emerging from fear.

Library is clear, the hostage is secured, we’re coming out now.

Roger that, you are clear for departure, a voice replied over the radio.

Hugging the walls down the hallways, police were escorting me, along with the other children out of the school, as other police groups joined us. Reaching the exit doors, police surrounded the single file lined group just shy of the exit doors, their guns drawn, preparing.

Okay everyone, on my mark we’re gonna rush outside across the parking lot behind the cruisers okay?!

We all nodded our heads, as we all braced ourselves, breathing frantically. The whole group was shaking, fighting past the tears dripping down our faces.

Alright ready?! Three, two, one, go, go, go!

Exiting the doors shots began raining down from above us. Ordering everyone down, the police quickly rushed the group across the parking lot as shots were exchanged along the roof of the school. Grouping everyone together, we huddled behind their police cruisers, covering our ears from the gunfire. Catching quick glimpses of the school, peering around the bumper, a single silhouette on top of the roof fired at the Swat team, firing back. The firing soon stopped as a kid next to me rose his head over the hood. The police ordered him to get down when one last shot was fired, striking him in the head, his brains spraying over the group next to me, screaming. A firing squad of bullets rang out forcing the silhouette behind cover.

I couldn’t see the silhouette anymore, the Swat team holding their positions. Seeing slight movements peeking over the edge, the silhouette quickly rose, jumping off the roof with a noose around her neck. Her body jerked suddenly leaving her dangling off the side of the school. Her body suspended, she struggled before the Swat team lifted her up pulling the rope as they grabbed and arrested her.

Threat secured! A voice said over the police radios.

Everyone exhaled a sigh of relief, as the police escorted us off-campus. Passing the school, the Swat team lifted the shooter to her feet. Everyone looked up at her for the last time. She wore an expressionless face, her lost cold gaze meeting mine, picking me out of the crowd. It felt like the devil staring back at me. I didn’t recognize her, but she felt all too familiar.

-God is pain. An empty casket. An illusion. State of mind. The glowing eyes of wolves come to scavenge what is left. The nails crucifying the mirage of hollowed familiars. Follow the rabbit with glasses into darkness. Blackening arising, become those you once praised, for what is an awakened life worth living in a blind world, growing darker. Become thy whispers, and swing amongst the nooses once tightened dripping down from the clouds echoing the laughter of children. Blood shall rain up to the sky tomorrow, for the sinners will drown above the eyes of the innocent. Feast the flesh of one’s offspring, for every parent wishes to bury their sons and daughters. Consume their power, kill thy guardians, for a silence that screams the loudest will come swiftly. Bring them into darkness, for the torch will melt away all sorrows. Then, will he be remembered as the failure he once taught.-

Chapter 2

Black and White Love

3:33 pm. Silence resonated in the car. Keys in my hand, their ridges a rhythmic pattern. Eyes blurred, nothing staring back. The world continued outside, time standing still in mine. Could almost merge the two, the sun slowly disappearing behind the tree line. His seat lay vacant. His face, the death of sound. The day the music died. My grips tightened around the wheel staring blankly, lost amongst my maze. Whispers guiding me out, they came as second nature now.

So, bye, bye Miss American Pie… Drove my Chevy to the levee but the levee was dry…Them good old boys were drinking whiskey and rye, singing this will be the day that I die…

He was supposed to finish it but, lyrics grew silent drifting away, forgetting where I left off.

6:14 pm. Peering forward, darkness painted the atmosphere, infinity becoming present. Keys meeting their female end, time slowly started to move again.

Plastic cracked and squeaked over bumps and turns. Coming to a light at an empty intersection I met my reflection staring back. Would I remember what I looked like? Could I find beauty in darkness? Felt further than I could reach, a trip mine lost amongst shallow waters. I walked alone.

A honk startled me back, seeing a woman pulled up behind me, inching forward. The light slowly passing above me grew black, seeing her turning behind me as I continued straight. Alone and surrounded by darkness once again, I let it swallow me.

I had a long ride ahead of me, dreading the time I’d get home by. Driving into town, it was like the darkness was swallowing everything around me. Passing them, buildings and businesses; closed, abandoned and burned down passing them. A ghost town. No one lived here anymore, just the street lights keeping it from not existing.

Approaching the loading dock, Frank manned the ferry booth as usual.

One way Louie? Frank asked in his raspy voice.

Yeah Frank, I replied shyly, avoiding eye contact.

How did it go, Louie? Good news I hope? Frank asked, a friendly old smile on his face.

Yeah, uh… Not too good Frank, I said, trying to match his smile, but couldn’t.

Oh, no. Oh, I’m sorry Louie, Frank answered with deep general concern in his voice.

Yeah well, what’ ya gonna do huh.

Well, at least you have Rhiannon to be there for you. Believe me, son, having my wife Grace at home, makes life have its purpose. Doesn’t stop nagging me and can’t cook for shit but, despite everything, I guess you could say we’re both arms on the same clock you know, we each gotta play our part to keep the gears turnin’.

Frank’s raspy voice nearly brought a tear to my eye, being like a father to me. Growing up in an orphanage, I never had a father. I wanted to leave on a high note and not tell him his wife died over three years ago but, it wasn’t my place. I didn’t want to leave him with what I was feeling.

Handing me my ticket, he patted me on the shoulder, leaving him with a smile, as I drove up the ramp pulling all the way to the front of the ferry. Exiting the car, there were only a handful of other vehicles lining the sides, making my way to the staircase leading upstairs.

Reaching the second floor, the ticket booth overlooked the room, rocking back and forth. Stamping my ticket, the lady behind the counter handed it back to me, putting it in my pocket, not exchanging a single word. It was quiet, hearing only slight shuffles in seats and squeaks from the windows. Walking past the booths, lining the walls, exhausted bodies lay sleeping, their heads resting on the windows, their mouths left agape, drooling. Pushing past the heavy door to the next area, I sat alone at the bar.

What’ll it be Lou, the usual? The bartender asked, cleaning a glass.

DiSaronno, if you got it, I replied, reaching inside my jacket pocket for my