A Very Wicked Man

By Daniel Nosal

Julian - a brilliant, charming, narcissistic, obscenely rich, and utterly debauched womanizer - has had his heart broken for the first time, leaving an irreparable wound, and a need for vengeance. But lacking the courage to commit a murder that might cost him his freedom, he instead joins an Internet dating service, where he seeks out erratic women to lure them to...a very unusual form of revenge.

But just as this game has grown stale for its failure to hit his true target, his final letter comes from Gwendolyn, who, he realizes, is the aunt of the girl who had wounded him – a lonely spinster who had raised her orphaned niece but had only been mocked, tormented, and then abandoned by the little brat four years before, when she left for Harvard. Julian gleefully goes in for one last strike. But Gwendolyn, while rather eccentric, is a little more level-headed than the others. Is he up to the task?

Julian’s courtly pursuits are interspersed with nights spent with his old friend, the equally decadent Milo, as they share Bacchanalian adventures, impassioned games of chess, and conversations on life, love, and the challenges of ennui.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Daniel Nosal
• Release date: Mar 30, 2019
• ISBN: 9780463174494

Daniel Nosal

After years of excessive education, squandered youth, and debauched adventure, and having fallen short of his original Life Goals (becoming either a revered saint, or a renowned poet), Daniel is now pursuing his alternative dream - becoming a Failed Novelist, unappreciated in his lifetime, but with a small and rabid cult following after his death.

Book preview

Chapter 1

"I never imagined I would meet someone like him, Felicia babbled as she picked at the scar on the inside of her wrist - an odd habit that would arise whenever she was feeling nervous, or excited - so elegant, yet so rugged, and so - handsome. A man who reads! Boccaccio, Thomas Hardy…. Flaubert!"

She fumbled with a teapot as she poured a cup for her friend, and then continued.

"I don’t know why Julian would seem so interested in me, she said. I’m not someone who could be thought of as…attractive. But he was so kind, and he said he would call. Oh, I have so little experience with men. What do you think, Millicent? Do you think that he’ll call?"

She smiled hopefully at her friend, who always smiled back. Millicent was a primly dressed, very large Victorian doll.

Chapter 2

Julian studied the chessboard with a look of concern. His position seemed hopeless, so he took a moment to look up and let his eyes wander around his library, with its old shelves full of rare books, its priceless furnishings, antiquities, and artwork, and its tall, frescoed ceiling. It was his favorite of the thirty-two rooms in his home, the one into which he had been born fifty-three years before, the one which he had left at age six to attend boarding school, and the one to which he had returned when his widowed father passed away, leaving Julian the mansion and more money than he could count.

Sitting across from him, Milo - smaller, delicate, and a little prettier than a man should be - Julian’s best friend since they had met on their first day at boarding school, each drawn to the other by that special, budding debauchery that only old money can spawn - pushed his pawn to D-5. He tapped the chess clock, stopping his timer, and setting off Julian’s.

Julian returned his attention to the board, but then stopped his clock, resigning the game.

There’s nothing I can do to keep your Rook from getting in, he said. And from there it’s fatal.

It’s true, I’m afraid, said Milo.

Julian looked up with a small, forced smile, pained by the defeat. Milo returned a larger, happier smile.

The benefit of wealth: said Milo, we have time to indulge in our little obsessions. I’ve been studying the Queen’s Gambit lately. I suspect I know its variations better than you at this point.

It would seem so, said Julian.

He added a touch of cognac to their snifters, and then held his aloft.

To our little obsessions, he smiled.

Here, here, said Milo, raising his.

They both sipped.

So, Milo said, "I’m surmising from your toast that perhaps there’s a new obsession tugging at you."

Perhaps, said Julian.

Oh? Do tell.

I’m not sure that I’m ready to.

Oh, that’s not fair…

Julian’s look turned serious.

This one is different, he said.

How so? asked Milo.

This one is dark.

That wouldn’t be a first for you.

Julian swirled his cognac, admiring its texture.

Darker, he said.

Oh? said Milo. Now I’m hopelessly intrigued.

Julian thought for a moment.

No, he said. It’s too soon. It’s not ripe.

Well, at least a hint, or you’ll be a bore.

A hint…. Alright, no harm in that. I’m dating.

"You’re dating?"

In a manner of speaking.

I’m shocked.

Oh?

Well…yes. I would think it would be too soon, after your affair with…

Ah-ah, Julian said as he raised his hand, stopping Milo in mid-sentence.

Yes, I know, said Milo. You never want to hear her name again.

Especially in this room….

"Why in this room?"

Because it’s here, Julian said as he gazed around dreamily, where I’ve spent so many nights, imagining a thousand different ways of killing her….

Were there any that seemed especially appealing?

Oh, they were all appealing in their own way, some for their brutality, some for their slow, painful delight….

Julian took a lingering sip, and then continued.

And you know, Milo? he said. During those reveries, I’ve come to believe that every man of genius, at some point in his life, turns his thoughts to pulling off the perfect murder, if for no other reason than the challenge of thinking up a way to do it, undetected. Even if one were to have no motive, the intellectual exercise, just on its own, is exquisite.

Did you come up with any?

No. I thought I had several times, but I always found a flaw.

"So, tell me, if you could murder her, knowing that you would never be caught, would you actually do it?"

Julian smiled.

Milo, he said. "You know me so well. What do you think?"

You’re right; it’s a silly question. Of course you would. But again, my initial shock. Dating? Don’t you feel it’s a bit soon?

No. It somehow feels as though it’s part of my...healing process....

Huh. It’s hard to imagine you actually having one of those.

Julian smiled.

In my own way, he said, perhaps I might.

So, who are you dating?

There are several that I’ve met.

Anyone I know?

Hardly, Julian laughed, as he picked up a chess piece and began to slowly twirl it through his fingers.

Is this through the scholarship program again?

Julian’s face turned ashen.

No, he said. I can’t do that again.

But that was a stroke of brilliance - advertising scholarships that you had no intentions of granting, as a lure to meet beautiful young women.

As you know, it backfired on me a little.

Yes, that was how you met….

Careful, Julian said, raising his hand.

…the girl, said Milo, who will forever remain nameless.

Julian stared at the chess piece in his hand, as he slowly ran his finger across its top.

When aroused, he said, her nipples were as firm as the head of this Bishop….

She was incredible, but even so, I’m still amazed that you actually fell in love.

No more so than I, Julian said with a look of wonder. Apparently it’s a poisoned capsule that God has implanted in us all....

Well, if it’s not the scholarship scam, where are you meeting these new, young, beautiful women?

They’re not so young, said Julian, and not so beautiful.

No?

No.

Why not?

I have my reasons.

I can’t imagine what they would be.

No. You can’t.

You’re a master at seduction, said Milo. You’ve bedded some of the most stunning women in the world. You’ve had stellar creatures half your age tied around your fingers. Why would you pursue anything less?

Julian continued to stare at the Bishop in his hand.

Ah, he said, there’s the mystery….

He held the Bishop up, and then dropped it onto the chessboard, sending chess pieces flying off the table. He looked at his old friend and smiled.

Chapter 3

Julian was paying close, but imperceptible, attention as Felicia absent-mindedly toyed with the scar on her wrist. He had noticed it on their first date, and it was the main reason why there was now a second. He wanted to ask about it, but it was still too soon. He raised his glass of port.

A toast, he said, to your wonderful company.

Felicia blushed, and almost dropped her glass as she tried to take a sip, which turned out to be more of a gulp.

I’m sorry, she said. I’m such a klutz sometimes.

It’s an endearing trait, Julian smiled.

You think so?

Yes. There’s always a deep passion behind clumsiness - as if so much longing and desire is struggling to break through.

I never thought of it that way.

And what do you think of it now?

She blushed again and looked down.

Perhaps you’re right, she said.

I know I am, said Julian.

He looked directly in her eyes. She looked up at him, but her eyes fluttered, and nervously darted away.

So, she said, trying to hold up her end of the conversation, did you like the opera?

I loved it, he said. One can never go wrong with Puccini.

I’ve never been to an opera before.

Did you enjoy it?

Yes, very much.

She looked around the quiet, upscale bar.

Do you come here often? she asked. Oh, that probably sounded cliché.

That’s all right, he smiled. No, I rarely have the chance to go out. I’m devoting most of my time these days to setting up my new foundation.

Oh? What kind of foundation is that?

I’m starting one for children in the Third World; he said, just now thinking up this new fabrication, such tragic souls, subjected to so much suffering.

Oh, that’s so nice of you.

Well, thank you. It’s very sweet of you to say that. I’ve found that other women I’ve met are resentful that I spend so much time on my charitable work.

Well, I think it’s wonderful that you do.

He placed his hand lightly on hers.

That makes you a very unique and special woman, he said.

Felicia felt as if fireworks were going off in her head, but not in a pleasant way. She tried to compose herself, but this was all too much for her. She had no choice but to just be nakedly honest with him.

May I ask you a question? she said.

Of course, he replied.

"I’ve…never had much experience with dating, but it seems that someone like you…well…you could be with anyone. Why are you going out with me?"

Julian had anticipated that question, and he had already composed his reply.

The fact that you would even think to ask that tells you why, he said. I don’t meet many women, but those I do have a sense of themselves that is so high, and unwarranted. You don’t have that, at all. You’re so very humble - and so sensitive. Your lack of dating experience is a testament to the fact that you might just be too special for this world, with all its harshness and cruelty. There’s so much delicacy in you, but it’s never found a way to emerge into this hostile realm.

He cast his eyes sadly downward.

I often feel that way myself, he lied. I know it may seem as though I can function well, but I feel afraid to let my heart open up into this brutal world.

Oh! she gasped. "You poor man. I understand. It is a difficult world. People can be so…unkind…."

As Julian was looking down, he began to imagine how life must have been for her. He could envision her as a child, with her…unfortunate appearance, and her awkward, hyper-excitable manner - undoubtedly rejected and tormented by all her peers. He thought of how life must have only gotten worse from there - driven into isolation, so damaged that she was simply incapable of interacting normally with others, until she had finally found herself making one last, desperate attempt to connect to someone, anyone, by joining an Internet dating service. He was certain that he had been the only one to respond to her ad - her photo must have surely frightened everyone else away.

Believe me, she said, I know just what you mean.

He looked up at her gratefully, and then placed his hand over hers.

So, you understand, he said.

Yes, I do, she said.

He squeezed her hand gently, with a vulnerable look.

It means a great deal to me to meet someone who does, he said.

She looked into his eyes. The fireworks were still going off in her head, but they suddenly formed a completely new constellation. Without even knowing what she was doing, she blurted out, Would you like to take me to your home, right now?

Julian stuck his free hand into his pocket, pulled out a hundred-dollar bill, and placed it on the table. He gently pulled her up and said, I would love to.

Chapter 4

This time it was Milo studying the chessboard with a look of concern, as Julian seemed certain to win a pawn, enough to make the outcome of the game a fait accompli. Milo looked for some way to turn the tide, but realized it was futile, and stopped his clock, resigning the game.

Well done, he said. And you even had the nerve to play a Queen’s Gambit.

As you said, Julian smiled, the benefit of wealth. I did some studying of my own. Kasparov had a clever retort to the variation you just played.

That’s what makes it the wonderful game it is - a million possibilities.

They reset the board and the chess clock. Julian refilled their snifters, with a satisfied grin.

You know how I hate to lose, he said.

More than anyone I’ve ever known, said Milo. Every time I win, I half expect you to pull a revolver on me.

"The funny thing is, Milo, despite the fact that you’re the dearest person in the world to me, every time you win, that’s exactly my first impulse."

You must be one hellish person to be romantically involved with.

This is what I hear.

Speaking of which, are you still carrying on with this dating nonsense?

I am.

Where are you meeting them?

Julian thought for a moment.

Oddly, he said, I’m almost embarrassed to say.

Knowing some of your previous sources, I can’t imagine how much lower you could sink.

Oh, Julian laughed. This world still has realms we'd never thought to explore.

Oh, come on. Tell, tell!

Are you ready for this?

I’m all a-tingle.

I’ve joined an Internet dating service.

Milo’s jawed fell a bit.

I beg your pardon? he said.

An Internet dating service, Julian repeated.

Why in God’s name would you do that?

It seemed like an interesting idea.

"For what? You move in the most exclusive circles there are. Do you expect to meet anyone of their caliber there?"

Maybe I’m not looking for caliber.

Then what are you looking for?

Julian thought for a moment.

Anonymity, he said.

Why? asked Milo. If you’re going through another of your satyriasis frenzies, you’ve been an open womanizer all your life. You’ve slept with a lot of the women in high society, many of whose husbands were perfectly aware of it, but too afraid of you to object. Why would you need anonymity?

As I said, this time it’s a little dark.

More so than sneaking around with the Russian Ambassador’s wife?

Oh, much.

Or when you tossed her aside and began sleeping with their daughter?

Yes.

Or when you got the daughter to star in that pornographic film?

I still have a copy. The scene with her and the transsexuals is hilarious.

"That was good. That even earned you a visit from the State Department. More scandalous than that?"

Oh, trust me, Milo, this is uncharted domain.

"Well, now you really have to tell me what you’re up to. This is too rich."

Julian thought for a moment.

I can’t really explain it yet, he said. I’m feeling my way as I go along. Let’s just say that I’m wandering down a road that I never could have imagined….

So, a whimsical new journey….

This isn’t whimsical. On the contrary, I feel utterly compelled.

Well, whatever it is, I can’t wait to hear. But what sort of people does one meet on an Internet dating service?

"My God, the worst possible sort - the conventional, the common, the kind I’ve never known."

Julian swirled his cognac as he mused.

Milo, he said, "I’ve had the pleasure of toying with women of wealth and standing, I’ve indulged myself with the most incredible escorts money can buy, and I’ve had my periods of cavorting with the lowest of the low, dragging through the gutters for the most desperate kind of prostitutes, and one thing that all of them had in common was a sense of cunning - alert to everything, like creatures in a jungle night. But these other people, the middle class, the everyday folk, are so…mundane. If you took the first two kinds of women I mentioned, those who have clawed their way to the top, or those who have stumbled their way to the bottom, you could blindfold them and drop them off in some treacherous part of the world, and they would all find a way to survive. But if you took these normal people and did the same, I think they would all just curl up in a ball and succumb."

And these are the type of women you’re seeking out?

I seem to be.

Why?

"I guess we’ll find out. In the meantime, I’ve only begun to take my revenge on you for the other night."

Julian pushed his pawn to Queen 4, tapped his clock, looked at Milo, and smiled.

Chapter 5

Julian and Felicia were cuddling nakedly, propped up by pillows in the bed of one of his guest rooms. He had lied, and said that this was his master bedroom, but he didn’t want her anywhere near there. He was grateful that she was wearing the perfume he had bought her, as the cheap fragrance she normally wore made him a little nauseous.

My God, Felicia said. I never knew it could be like this.

Like what? Julian asked.

Just so...wonderful…. I never could have imagined myself with someone like you.

You see? It’s that humility that makes you so special.

He took her hand and kissed it, and then let his fingers run down to her wrist.

What is this? he asked innocently, gently stroking her scar.

She pulled her arm away instinctively, looking frightened.

No, he said, taking her hand again and studying her scar. It’s all right. What happened?

She started to shake a little.

You don’t know? she asked.

No, he lied.

She hesitated.

I’m…afraid to tell you, she said.

Why?

I don’t want you to think badly of me.

How could I ever do that?

She looked at him carefully as she spoke.

I…I tried to slash my wrist, she said.

My God, Julian gasped.

You see. That’s why I didn’t want to tell you.

No. I don’t think badly of you. But tell me why. I want to understand.

I’ve had some moments when I’ve been very…confused...and depressed. One time, it was just too much, and…I tried to kill myself.

Slitting your wrist, he said as he studied her scar more carefully, wasn’t that…painful?

No, she said. I applied an anesthetic first. And I didn’t have to cut deeply. I’m a hemophiliac. One little paper cut and you’d better rush me right to the hospital.

Then how did you survive?

I forgot that they were changing the showerheads in my building that day. I had settled into a warm bath, and had just slit it with a razor blade when a plumber let himself in. He called 911, and then squeezed my wrist until the ambulance came.

When did this happen?

She looked down.

I’m embarrassed to say, she said softly.

No, please, he said.

It was…just last year.

I told you. You’re too special for this world.

I don’t know if it was that. It was just…so many things….

But I think they all come down to one thing, he said sadly. Things that are truly beautiful, like your soul, are simply too delicate for this world. It corrupts them, hurts them. It tears them apart.

You sound as though you….

She looked up at him.

No, she said. I can’t ask.

Ask what?

She didn’t reply.

I know what you were thinking, he said. And yes, he lied again, I, too, once tried to kill myself.

When was this? she asked.

Like you, it was last year.

Why?

Julian looked off into the distance.

I…just know, he said, that there must be…a better place for me….

Do you mean like some kind of…heaven? she asked.

I can’t really say. But I feel a deep calling, as if the most precious things inside me don’t belong in this realm…but are meant to be…somewhere else….

Do you feel that unhappy?

It’s not a question of being unhappy. It’s a matter of honoring what’s best in me, and helping it to find its way...home....

I’ve never thought of it that way.

You might want to try.…

"But what about this? she asked. I feel so happy to be with you. Don’t you feel the same about being with me?"

Yes, he said, kissing her hand. Of course, I do. It’s heavenly. But heaven can never last on earth. This is just what I mean. What we’ve found together is even more fragile than all the other things that I’ve felt can’t survive in this world. I’m convinced that there must be a better place where these things are meant to flourish.

"But why can’t they last here?"

I’ll let you think about that yourself. Tell me, why exactly did you slash your wrist?

I was so unhappy, and so confused.

Look more deeply. Why have you been so unhappy?

She thought for a minute, and then said, I couldn’t fit in. I didn’t belong anywhere. And it was so painful to feel that way.

Julian assumed a look of profound sadness.

I know just what you mean, he said.

But, she said, we have each other. Don’t we?

Yes, we do, and it’s so joyous to have found you. But can this world sustain anything this delicate? My fear is that it can’t - this just isn’t its rightful place.

She pressed her head against his chest, looking down.

I don’t want to think about this anymore, she said.

All right, he said, allowing a small smile to emerge. We won’t think about it. For now….

Chapter 6

Julian and Milo were sitting in large, stuffed chairs in Julian’s favorite room. The mood that night didn’t call for cognac and chess. Instead, they were well into their second bottle of very smooth gin and staring thoughtlessly into space, tossing stray comments back and forth.

Lately, Milo said