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    The Apple Doesn't Fall Far
    The Apple Doesn't Fall Far
    The Apple Doesn't Fall Far
    Ebook143 pages28 minutes

    The Apple Doesn't Fall Far

    By Stephen Hawn and Mala Kral

    ()

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    About this ebook

    Funny, outlandish, and sometimes poignant true short stories from those who teach middle school. If you survived middle school, are in middle school, or will someday attend middle school, heck, if you know anyone who ever went to or even drove past a middle school, these uncensored, spot on stories are written for and about you. With topics ranging from adolescent vulgarity, to helicopter parenting, fakes and forgeries, and locker room antics, the shared suffering and humor of adolescent angst that binds us all together makes this a laugh out loud and maybe cry out loud must read book.
    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherBookBaby
    Release dateJul 1, 2018
    ISBN9781543939804
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      Book preview

      The Apple Doesn't Fall Far - Stephen Hawn

      Copyright 2018 Stephen Hawn and Mala Kral

      Print ISBN 978-1-54393-979-8

      eBook ISBN 978-1-54393-980-4

      All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

      Table of Contents

      Dedication

      Preface

      Strange But True

      Punish Me

      Fattest Man

      Moist Palms

      Bugs a Bubbling

      Sight, Sounds, Scents, and Snakes

      Pogo-Stick Play

      Flaming Hot Cheetos

      Deodorant Girl

      Belly Button Weekend

      New Pee Bag

      Horse Back

      Skinny Jeans, Big Shoes…Not a Winning Combo

      Self-Imposed Confinement

      Nailed for Stabbing

      Just When You Think You’ve Heard it All…

      Stash Pocket

      Treats for Everyone

      Classroom Observation

      He/She

      Shocking Parent Comment

      Knee, Dog, Skates, etc.

      Messing, Smacked, Hydrant, etc.

      Sock Surprise

      IBS

      Starter Pistol

      Why Locker Rooms Need Air Conditioning

      Rough Play Sunday

      Meet Me at the Bike Rack

      Cheers

      Principal Darkside

      Helicopter Parents

      AYSO Semester Off

      Fat Mom in Her Own Words

      Follow Up with Fat Mom

      Big Breakfast

      Big Game Tonight

      Respect My Decision

      Competitive Cheer > PE

      Sunshine Fresh Laundry

      Soccer > PE

      Dance Competition > PE

      Sock Police

      Speed Kills

      Serenity No Taunting Pledge

      Why We Defy the Pledge

      Fever Stay Home

      MD Says Student Can Decide

      Foot Blister Epidemic

      Sprained Weist?

      Can’t Suit Up

      2-Day Hypothyroid Problem

      Stomach + Allery = Legs

      Domestic Duties Struggle

      Of Course Kids Don’t Weigh Kids

      Teacher Ogre

      Excessively Excessive

      American-Made Pencils

      Student Shams

      Heart Burns

      Multiple Choice Excuses

      Locker Devil

      Lesson Learned?

      Missing Shorts = Locker Room Hideout

      Fake Domestic Duties Struggle

      THREW OUT HER LEG

      Who has the Cuncution?

      Trouble All Around

      Straight into a Hole

      ON HER PERIOD.

      Sincereley not Well

      Right Another Note

      Fudged Date

      Simpsonisms

      F-Word

      Suck It

      Not Act Iniproprietly

      Ditching is Bad

      No Gum Nick

      It’s All in the Name

      Harry Dong

      Harry Dong Part 2

      Miss Dick

      Vikings Vick

      That’s My Real Name

      Master Herpes

      Ribald

      That Gesture

      Until I Squeal!

      Adolescent Cootie Catcher

      Hookups

      PEN15 Club Part 1

      PEN15 Club Part 2

      Monkeyballs

      Family Heirloom: ROCK THESE

      Underwear to Work

      A Really Good Read

      Pants Down

      It Makes it Worth It

      Halloween #Legcramps

      Really Bad Hang Nail

      Jacked Up Knee

      Last Rights

      Middle Finger Problem

      Rousing Game

      Wonderbra

      Borrowing vs Stealing

      PE + Lunch Excuse

      LEGS ONLY PE

      Last Note of the Year

      Less Straight Forward

      To Whom It May Concern: Sorry

      Trusted

      Teacher Valentine

      Surprise Award

      Locker Room Confidence American Pride

      A Cool Apology

      1,160%-1,170%

      Student Art Apology

      Golden Rule

      Proverbs Apology

      Character

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