He Changed Me: A Journey Through the Wilderness, One Creative Writing at a Time

By Pamela Farrar

Dare to venture into dark places and triumph over what the enemy thought would paralyze your future with fear. He Changed Me is a compilation of poetry, parables, and devotionals that articulate the joy and pain in spiritual maturity. Our wilderness experience as we travel to the Promised Land is a step-by-step process that will transform the life of a lost sheep crying out in the wilderness into that of an empowered disciple. The essential requirement for ministering to hurting people is to experience God's resurrecting power for yourself. Doing so will change your perspective on life with ordered steps to God's plan.

We often sugarcoat Christianity and silence the real story behind our victory. This journey through the wilderness will inspire you to conquer a painful past, low self-esteem, and spiritual torment that is designed to break your spirit and kill your dreams. Take a walk with author Pamela Farrar through trials and tribulations as she presses her way through branches of bad choices, climbs mountains of impossibilities, and traverses the dense terrain of setbacks and disappointments. He Changed Me will lead you on a path of spiritual freedom and self-awareness.

• Language: English
• Publisher: WestBow Press
• Release date: Feb 15, 2012
• ISBN: 9781449737313

Pamela Farrar

Pamela Farrar, poet and storyteller, is married with three sons. She lives in Baltimore, Maryland. Pamela teaches the importance of continuing the ministry of Jesus through literary arts. She loves spending time with her family, jewelry beading, crocheting afghans, and walking on the beach with her dog, Creasey.

Book preview

Contents

Dedication

Acknowledgments

Introduction

BRING BACK MY SHEEP

Bring Back My Sheep

The Valley of Roses

When I Get Myself Together

The Sickest People Are in the Church

Where Will You Build Your Church?

My Christian Coat

The Wilderness

Waiting on My Change

The Servant Who Waited Too Long

Lord, Use Somebody Else

Iain’t Got Time

Sleepwalking on Jesus

The Willow Tree

The Mirror

He Knows When You Are Hungry

My Place in Christ

My Walk with the Lord

I Gave Misery a Funeral

Poetry

A Forgiving Heart

Too Ashamed

A Wonderful Gift

Consume the Word

Me First

My Reason

Be Careful Why You Show It

It’s Hard to Forget

You Shall Know Me by My Wounds

The Dream

Out of My Heart

A Living Testimony

A Holy Treat

Not This Lifetime

Agape

Lost Sheep Crying out in the Wilderness

WITH WINGS TO FLY

With Wings to Fly

New Creature

Hanna Had Hope

Standing in the Back of the Line

Stay Focused

I Know

The Old Man Made New

The Eagle that Never Tried

Climbing Higher

Afraid to Be Free

He Just Held Me … Closer

The Test of Faith

The Big Sunday Dinner

Curse that Demon

My Father Cried For Me

Your Fear of Flying

They Said …

Do You Love Me More Than These?

My Friends

Never Fear

My Walk to Simon’s House

Friends or Flies

Girlfriend, Let’s Talk

My Amnon

The Holy Spirit Sat on My Bed

Keep Me on a Narrow Path

Cruel Intentions

Keep Your Eyes Ahead

Revive Me Once More

If I Had Wings of a Dove

I’m Not Looking Back

His Love Is Real

No Longer!

I Sign My Heart to My Dearest Friend

It’s Time to Give Birth

It’s All about You

Too Scared

MORE THAN A CONQUEROR

More Than a Conqueror

Behind Every Thorn I Found My Blessings

It’s Time!

It’s Just a Scratch

I Had No Choice

My Journey on Hard Road

I Tried

Seeds of Hope and Inspiration

No Crisis, No Crown

Learning from My Experience

Fairytales

Sometimes

Showered Tears

Nothing Left but Issues

All Packed for the Journey

I Am My Mother’s Daughter

The Prayer of Jabez

Our Journey Together

Born a Curse, Reborn a Blessing

The Missing Link

In Need of Virtue

My Tears Shall Be My Food

Tormented but Gifted

Children, Have You Any Food?

Fear of Consumption

Honey, It’s Time

I Just Got Tired …

I Just Kept … Breathing

The Time Has Come

I’m Coming out of This!

Look Up, Stay Focused, and Be Blessed

What’s Next?

Look Up, Stay Focused,

and Be Blessed

PHOTO CREDITS:

Dreamstime.com

Sheep © 2012 by Jörg Unfried

Bring Back My Sheep © 2012 by Jennifer Russell

He Knows When You Are Hungry © 2012 by Reynardt Badenhorst

The Dream © 2012 by Dan Bannister

Lost Sheep Crying Out in the Wilderness © 2012 by Nicola Mortali

With Wings to Fly © 2012 by Spllogics

I Know © 2012 by Melissa Schalke

He Just Held Me Closer © 2012 by Barbara Helgason

My Father Cried for Me © 2012 by Calyx22

Keep Me on a Narrow Path © 2012 by Aleksander Bolbot

More Than a Conqueror © 2012 by Grafos1fp

It’s Just a Scratch © 2012 by Kaarsten

Showered Tears © 2012 by Michel Van Loon

I Just Kept Breathing © 2012 by Mitar Gavric

I’m Coming Out of This! © 2012 by Jpaget Rfphotos

The Revelation © 2012 Draw05

BigStock.com

It’s Time to Give Birth© 2012 by Suprijono Suharjoto

Our Journey Together © 2012 by Peter Galbraith

Fairytales © 2012 by Suzanne Tucker

My Tears Shall Be My Food © 2012 by Laurin Rinder

Look Up, Stay Focused, and Be Blessed © 2012 by Robert Anderson Jr.

Dedication

To my three sons, it is truly an honor to be able to watch you grow into great men of God. To my loving husband, Brian, for believing in me no matter how much the world was against us. Thank you for being my Joseph. Our destiny may have been difficult, but the miracle is in what it produced. It made us stronger because we learned how to endure and appreciate everything in our lives together.

Then the man said, Your name will no longer be Jacob, but Israel, because you have struggled with God and with humans and have overcome.

—Genesis 32:28

Acknowledgments

To my family, friends, and new church home at Empowerment Temple where Rev. Dr. Jamal Harrison-Bryant is the pastor, bless you and thank you for all your love and support. Thank you for the spirit of empowerment and believing that God can change anybody who has been through anything. It feels good to be in the land of milk and honey where I am free to fly into my destiny and not feel ashamed.

And a very special thank you to those who opposed, abused, used, talked behind my back, chastised, ridiculed, criticized, hurt my feelings, blocked my blessings, broke my heart, schemed to bring me pain, and called me out of my name. Thank you so very much. It is because of your generous contributions that I was so motivated and inspired to seek God’s face and dwell in His presence. He healed my heart and transformed my mind to a place where I can love my enemies and appreciate a heartbreaking and painful past. It was all part of His perfect plan for my life; it was a necessary journey to the Promised Land. He promised me, and now I am standing on green pastures, knowing that He loves me and will never leave me, and He is not a man that He should lie.

Introduction

Warning! This book contains words of hope and inspiration. It may cause sudden outbursts of tears that will release the spirit of empowerment and healing. Do not be alarmed; this is a result of the power of the Holy Spirit restoring what the enemy has destroyed. Please do not try to read this entire book in one sitting. I wrote this book through many tears in the hope that I would encourage you to hold on until you witness His perfect plan for your life. This is a journey of the heart, mind, and spirit, so set aside time to pray, meditate, and study the Scriptures. Conquer your own issues, and continue to turn the pages of your life, no matter how much it hurts. Every step you take with Jesus will bring you closer to the promises of God and to a revelation that will change your life forever.

To feel God’s undying love and power of transformation in your life, you will need the following:

• a Bible

• an open heart and mind

• a box of tissues

He Changed Me is divided into three dimensions that correspond to the spiritual levels Christians go through in their walk with the Lord. The first dimension, Bring Back My Sheep, deals with learning one’s value in the eyes of God, struggling toward spiritual maturity, and understanding the purpose of spiritual gifts. The second dimension, With Wings to Fly, describes the battle of fighting negative influences, including naysayers and low self-esteem, both of which can leave one paralyzed with fear. The third dimension, More Than a Conqueror, articulates the pain and labor involved in facing personal issues and learning how to deal with God’s high expectations. A dimension refers to the spiritual growth or capacity, depth of experiences, weight of burdens, range of discipline, and scope of giftedness one needs to reach a higher level that is closer to His glory or a level of spiritual maturity.

The common denominator that helps believers minister to hurting people is for them to experience God’s resurrecting power for themselves and allow it to pull them out of dead situations and painful experiences. He Changed Me creatively preaches the gospel to help anyone who is going through hard times to feel comforted and to be encouraged to hold on to God’s unchanging hands. You are encouraged to witness each season of the author’s experiences and learn from her struggles, disappointments, and growing pains as she uses ordinary situations, everyday settings, dreams, and Bible stories to illuminate her own spiritual journey. It is time for His creative disciples to become spiritual innovators by using the Word to bring a fresh revelation to a new generation.

Genesis 32:28 says, Then the man said, ‘Your name will no longer be Jacob, but Israel, because you have struggled with God and with humans and have overcome.’ This Scripture describes the writer’s personal testimony of how God can change anybody who desires to become a better person. Jacob’s name change was also a manifestation of God’s power to change the heart, mind, and spirit. God changed Jacob’s self-image and perspective toward life, although he still experienced trials and tribulations with a purpose. In contrast to the name given to him by man, Jacob, which means deceiver, Israel means man of God. God renamed Jacob according to Jacob’s longing for a change in his life to overcome. It is good news to know that you can start out in life as a Jacob and end up with a name that not only identifies your struggles but also gives a testimony that God can change anybody through anything.

The Bible can never be outdated; there is a revelation for every situation. Every book, chapter, and verse reveals hidden treasures waiting to be discovered and help answer life’s questions. Revelation exposes, shocks, or is an eye opener that surprisingly reveals secrets of the kingdom and makes them plain for all to comprehend. Revelation is the truth. Each creative literature in this book has a Scripture reference to inspire you to look deeper into the Word of God. Pray for understanding as you seek His wisdom and find your purpose. God will come down to you and speak at a level you will understand through dreams, visions, circumstances, and Scriptures. Vision is the ability to dream with imagined foresight to see beyond normal circumstances. Do not be intimated by the Bible. For every day you walk with Him, you will hear and understand His voice better. I encourage you to study and apply the Scriptures in your life so you can reveal the spiritual gifts hidden inside of you.

The time has come to understand the true value of possessing heavenly treasures in a modern world. The wisdom and knowledge we learn can never be stolen, and the blessings of knowing who you are in the kingdom of God can never be removed. You are more than a conqueror, but you must walk through your wilderness, never give up, and believe in the promises of God.

Enjoy the journey!

18LostSheep.jpg

Bring Back My Sheep

The First Dimension

BRING BACK MY SHEEP

The First Dimension

(Matt. 18:12–14)

The ministry God has placed on His disciples is not intended for the majority of people. A disciple is a follower, student, or scholar of Jesus Christ who rightly divides the Word of God to preach the gospel; a believer. We often get so caught up in what the majority is doing that our journey to get closer to Him is sidetracked by the world’s needs rather than our own spiritual needs. We compromise our ministry to catch the interest of the mainstream and to gain popularity rather than to gain respect from God. We trust in the response of man instead of trusting in the steps God has ordained for us to follow (Prov. 3:5–6).

I am reminded of this when I read the parable of the lost sheep (Luke 15:3–7). Lost sheep refers to those who are poor in spirit, mournful, and meek or those who hunger and thirst and are persecuted and outcast of society; sinners. The message in this parable reminds me of our responsibilities toward His people. It does not matter how large or small the group is that I minister to; if I can just touch one, I have fulfilled God’s purpose in my life. Life would have been so much easier for Jesus if He had stayed on the hill and preached to the righteous with happy sermons of praise. Jesus came to preach "good news to