Strength to Let Go: Tales of the Werewolf Tribes, #1

By Alina Popescu

After being abandoned by his mates, Shiki Kirishima, beta of the Dragons of the Fang werewolf tribe, returns to his home in Tokyo. Overwhelmed by grief, he decides to end it all by going into Siberian Killer territory and challenging the tribe to a battle to the death. 

His death. 

The Killers' beta, Ganzorig, grasps the potentially disastrous consequences of his tribe killing Shiki, and saves him instead. Having suffered loss, Ganz takes it upon himself to help Shiki deal with his pain, then return him safely to his tribe. 

Shiki's best friend since childhood, Blake, is as determined as Ganzorig to show him there is life after a wolf's ultimate loss, that of a mate. 

Once Shiki leaves the seclusion of Ganzorig's compound and returns to Tokyo, Blake is the only person he allows near. Blake is more than happy to give Shiki space to lick his wounds and deal with everything in his place. Shielded from his responsibilities to his family and tribe, and cocooned in Blake's care, Shiki thrives on his journey to healing. 

As the real world pushes its way in, with competing tribes causing trouble, children to worry about, and exes to deal with, will Shiki be able to cope or will he spiral back to a state of pure misery? And is there room for more than friendship between him and Blake?

• Language: English
• Publisher: Alina Popescu
• Release date: Jul 29, 2018
• ISBN: 9781386815570

Alina Popescu

Alina Popescu is an author, traveler, and coffee addict. She has published several paranormal, science fiction, urban fantasy, and contemporary series, many of them having reached the Amazon bestseller lists for their genres. Her stories often fall under the LGBTQ fiction and romance subgenres. Born and raised in Romania, Alina has been writing for most of her life. She’s an avid consumer of stories in all their forms. She’s fascinated by myths, folk tales, and other creators’ visions of the future. She finds her inspiration in books of all genres, movies, and the occasional TV shows or anime binges. Alina is a proud geek and needs her fast internet connection and assortment of gadgets more than she needs air.

Book preview

By Alina Popescu

Tales of the Werewolf Tribes

Book 1

Table of Contents

Title Page

Copyright

Acknowledgments

Werewolf Tribes

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Lead to Follow, Book Two of the Series

Glossary

Meet Alina Popescu

More from Alina Popescu

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced or transmitted by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying or otherwise, without prior permission of the author.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental. In other words, if you think this is about you, it probably isn’t! But, as an Internet meme says, if the shoe fits, then lace it up and wear it proudly!

Warning! This is a contemporary gay romance novel. If you don’t like men falling in love with other men, stop now and move on to reading something else. There are a few sexual situations, some of them explicit. There is occasional swearing as well.

Strength to Let Go

Tales of the Werewolf Tribes, Book One

Second Edition

Copyright © 2015 Alina Popescu

http://alina-popescu.com

All rights reserved.

Cover art by 8th floor studio

Acknowledgments

IF YOU’VE read The Edge of Hope, then you know these get a bit long in my case. If you haven’t, well, buckle up, this won’t be the quickest ride ever. Also, I apologize, and will try not to go all the way back to the dawn of my existence in my mother’s womb this time around! Bear in mind, I only said I will try, there’s no guarantee for success.

Tales of the Werewolf Tribes has been in the works for a while, and Shiki’s story wasn’t always intended to be the first installment. I happened to discover role play writing and found it a great exercise, so I plucked one of the characters from the universe and let him run wild in the world of RP. Shiki Kirishima became a larger than life, hard to shut up character, hence the book you’re reading now.

My first and biggest thank you goes to my two writing partners on Shiki, Karen and Terri. They both gambled on writing with me, an RP noob, and we had tons of fun together. It helped me come up with a million little details about Shiki and the entire werewolf world, and I will forever be grateful. Shiki’s novel is loosely based on some of the RP interactions (after deciding on where to go with the story, bits of it have been role-played with Blake), but you won’t find them on my role play profile, you will find alternative story lines leading to the same outcome.

A special thanks to my friend and very talented writer, Tobias (Taz for friends). This wonderful demon is the catalyst to my deciding to start role playing and I thank him for it every day. I am equally grateful to everyone I’ve met since joining this new adventure a little over a year ago. I’ve met amazing people, thrilling characters, and a lot of wonderful writers.

Another big thank you goes to my beta readers, JP, Terri and Alina. You are all brilliant and I can’t thank you enough, not just for reading but for the support and encouragement.

I would also like to thank the Wayward Ink Publishing family who were the first to take a chance on this story and publish it. To Lily for believing in my story, to Frosty for being so damn happy to edit this story, and everyone else at WIP, writers, editors, and designers, for making this such a wonderful experience for me.

A special thank you goes to Alina F and 8th floor studio for the amazing cover this book has. Alina F worked through her holidays to get this ready on time for the re-release and put up with all my demands and freak-outs. In the end, she came up with an incredibly beautiful concept that matches the story perfectly.

As always, my parents and extended family, my friends (real life and online), and my dog have been my cheerleaders and my support system. I thank them all for the patience, love, and encouragements.

I suppose I should also thank the gorgeous Gackt for the visual inspiration for the Kirishima twins. And for the music, especially Returner and Last Song, that’s helped me through this. I cried and laughed with my characters, and while Last Song made the first part of the novel better, Returner was what pushed me through till the end.

Lastly, but just as important as any other group I’ve mentioned, I would like to thank everyone who is about to read this book, be it RP friends, longtime fans, or new readers. Giving my story a try means the world to me and I appreciate it. If you like it, hate it, or just want to tell me how many times you wanted to either throw the book away or rolled your eyes with Shiki, feel free to message me.

Happy reading,

Alina

Werewolf Tribes

Dragons of the Fang

Location: Far East Asia, including Japan, China, Vietnam, Korea, Malaysia, Indonesia etc.

Leadership: Japan clans. Alpha—Shishou Kirishima. Betas—Shiki Kirishima, Ren Yukina

Other special traits: Must be born into the tribe. Cannot turn humans. Eyes turn blue when the wolf comes closer to the surface (strong emotions or arousal are big triggers).

Sons of Ulric

Location: United Kingdom, Ireland, Northern countries

Leadership: U.K. clans. Alpha—Stuart Hawkwood. Betas—Doug / Douglass Margrave, Paul Townsend

Other special traits: Must be born into the tribe. Cannot turn humans.

Dacian Wolves

Location: Eastern Europe, parts of Central Europe, Balkans, Turkey.

Leadership: Romanian clans. Alpha—Vicks (Victoria) Ionescu. Beta—Cristian Ghica

Other special traits: Constant number—2,000 wolves, must be born into the tribe, cannot turn humans. The Dacian Wolves’ alpha is the leader of all werewolf tribes and heads the Tribes’ Council. Position in the tribe is given by the placement of a Dacian Wolf tattoo that appears when a wolf turns (back of the neck for alpha, shoulder for beta, upper torso for war leaders, lower on the body for everyone else).

Loups Royals

Location: France, Spain, Portugal, North African countries

Leadership: French clans. Alpha—Etienne Chevalier. Beta—Claude Lachance.

Other special traits: Can turn humans.

Saxon Fighters

Location: Germany, Italy, Switzerland, part of Central Europe

Leadership: German clans. Alpha—Michael König. Betas—the Kühn twins, Greta and Walter

Other special traits: Must be born into the tribe. Cannot turn humans

Gray Spirits

Location: North, Central, and South America

Leadership: Only tribe led by a Council of Elders. They give directives to the War Council led by the War Chief.

Other special traits: Can turn humans but warriors and Elders must be born into the tribe.

Siberian Killers

Location: Russia, Mongolia, some parts of the Middle East

Leadership: Mongolian clans. Alpha—Chinggis. Beta—Ganzorig

Other special traits: Must be born into the Mongolian clans. Other clans can turn humans. Any wolf that steps into Siberian Killer territory will be killed.

Other worldwide werewolf tribe directives:

Turning humans requires leadership approval.

The secrecy of werewolf existence must be upheld by members of each and every clan.

Leadership representatives must attend the two Tribes’ Councils (spring and autumn). The location for the next meeting is established during each council.

Tribes are made up of clans. Clans are divided into packs (not always, one pack can also count as a clan).

Most wolves that don’t change eye color have a golden circle around their pupils or golden flecks in their irises.

Chapter One

IT TOOK ME a minute to open my eyes. My eyelashes were stuck together in a messy tangle of dried tears. I groaned and rubbed them furiously, trying to ease the sting. I blinked a few times, until the garish glow of sunlight reached my pupils and made me cringe. My eyes hurt and I swore, turning my back to the annoying source of light. I reached out to pull either Kayden or Kieran closer and was greeted by the cold emptiness on their side of the bed.

Fuck!

Yes, that was right, I had gone to bed alone, knowing I was going to wake up in the same sorry state, forever. Yay me! Great going.... I forced my eyes open again, the light of day and the pangs of loss and hurt making my vision blurry with tears that I promptly fought back. I had exhausted my stash of sake, then finished all of Kieran’s absinthe. Not like he’d be back here to drink it anytime soon. He and Kayden had made their merry way back to the Fae Realm, leaving me behind. Sayonara, Shiki!

Well, they hadn’t actually said that, they only ever spoke to me in Japanese to whisper words of love. However they’d said it, the message had been clear: I was without my mates. I had lost my dark prince and my warrior. There was no turning back, I had no say in it, and I could keep the castle if I wanted to. Sure, ’cause that’s something I’d do!

I pushed myself up, sitting in the middle of our huge bed and slumping against the sea of pillows adorning our headboard. I sighed and ran both hands through my now very messy hair, trying to wrap my mind around what had happened. Yesterday I was happily married to the loves of my life and my mates. Mated wolf... now that was a concept I would have laughed at a little over six months ago. Then Kieran and Kayden happened, and I’d given them everything in a mere heartbeat. Yesterday I was Ryuu’s adoptive father and I had Kimmie’s lineage to figure out, find the relatives of the lost pup or add a daughter to our perfect family. It had seemed perfect, hadn’t it? The joke was on me now.

I still could not figure out where I’d gone wrong. Granted, I had no relationship experience. Maybe that was it. I’d spent the first three decades of my life focused on my training before anything else. I was one of the twin sons of the Kirishima family, after all. Shishou, my twin, was supposed to be our alpha and I was supposed to be his general, leading the soldiers and all military campaigns of the Dragons of the Fang tribe. I’d only had flings, I’d fucked men left and right, and a couple of women when someone truly amazing had come my way. It was no wonder I’d screwed up my first ever relationship.

But how? That simple question had been plaguing me since the previous night, as I poured alcohol down my throat, my neurons snapping with electric connections in a race to solve the puzzle. There had been little to no signs. Yes, Kieran got into his dark moods at times. Yes, Kayden no longer sharing the same body with Kieran and us becoming a three-way thing had been hard. But we had survived all that. It had been months since that happened. What had I done wrong? What was I missing, how hadn’t I been enough for them? I wished they’d told me, that way I could have.... Ah, who was I kidding? Not like I could change. Werewolves, we knew all that. One cannot be anything other than who they are. It was all there in their actions, and most of all, their scent. Emotions, pheromones, lust, hunger, even thoughts, it was all reflected in the scent, and that one little marker could never deceive.

Right, time to get the fuck out of here, I mumbled, stumbling out of bed and making my way on groggy feet to the shower. I let the hot water hit me with full force until I completely lost track of time and myself. Having a martial arts background instilled in me by a traditionalist sensei who valued the ability to meditate and focus did help at times. I could direct all of my concentration to the sound and needle-like sting of the water, until those sounds and sensations enveloped me, shutting down everything else.

I couldn’t hide away like that forever. I reluctantly got out and went through the motions of my morning routine. I even styled my jet black hair, which was now once again back to my natural color. I strolled out of the en suite naked, not that I had bothered much with that aspect before. Right now, I almost wished I’d run into them and the sight of my body would make them change their minds. Even if I knew there was no chance in hell of that happening, I still felt the disappointment wash over me when I returned to the hollow room.

I put on a pair of skinny jeans and a black T-shirt that stretched across my chest and bulging upper arm muscles, then fumbled about, trying to find a pair of combat boots and a leather jacket. I stuffed my laptop, some of my toiletries, and a few mementos in a backpack and then stood in front of the walk-in closet, wondering what to take and what to leave behind. A fresh waft of their scents made my nostrils flare as I touched their clothes. I whimpered and brushed away fresh tears, deciding to leave everything behind. It was too hard and I knew my dark prince, he’d have his employees purge the place for him. He’d never go through the pain of sorting out our clothes, separating them. Then again, seeing how they’d left me, I was thinking it wouldn’t quite have the same effect as it was having for me.

I walked from room to room, remembering how we’d fucked in all of them, against each and every piece of furniture. I went through sweet moments and conversations, the rare fights and the deafening silence when they’d leave without things being right between us. It hadn’t been all rainbows and butterflies, but it had been perfect to me just the same. It had been everything I wanted and needed and I would have given my life to protect it. Seems I was alone in that sentiment though.

A wolf that had lost his mates.... A sorry being, cursed to roam the earth, never happy, never complete, longing for his lost mates. I shuddered, remembering my mother’s hollowed eyes when my father had left her in a fit of stupid rage. How she could not eat, sleep, or function properly. She’d left us, my brother, my little sister and me, to go find him. She had managed to find him quickly enough and they’d kissed and made up, but then they got killed on their way back to us. I envied her that fate. At least I wasn’t making my children watch as I left. They were way too young to understand and I’d give Kieran and Kayden that: they’d left me while the children were safe with my brother and his family in the U.K.

Well, time to say goodbye to Ireland and the castle, I whispered, my small voice still echoing in the large hallway at the main entrance. My first real home other than my Sensei’s house in Okinawa.

I closed my eyes, willing the magic to happen, and when I opened them again I was in my apartment in Tokyo. The flashing here and there was cool and all, but it also meant something else. The fae blood my mates had fed me had forever changed me. I was half-fae now, with some of the strongest powers of the species running through me. My husbands would always be part of me.

My dark prince and my warrior had not spent a lot of time here. A few days at best, just because I wanted to show them where I’d lived before them. When we came to visit, we usually stayed at the Alpha mansion since there was more space and it kept my family happy. Yet the room still smelled of them and a sob escaped me at the realization. It just sucked, plain and simple. There was nowhere I could run to where I wouldn’t be overwhelmed by their presence, by the memories of it all. I stripped and flashed to the Alpha mansion’s garden. It opened into a few acres of forest where we could run free when we really needed to. I was way too far gone to even think of going anywhere else.

I fell to my knees shouting at the skies and the change took me. I pawed at the ground, getting reacquainted with my wolf. For some reason, I hadn’t shifted to this form as often during my time with Kieran and Kayden. I only did so when Kieran, after being forever altered by my blood, needed to change into his wolf form. We’d run wild on the property surrounding our castle, Kayden riding behind us, giving chase on his black steed to catch up to us.

It felt good to have the light wind blowing through my fur, to be this close to the ground and sense the small game as it fled from my path. I shook my whole body, then lifted my head, letting out a long howl. There was no better way to express all the anguish, all the pain, and all the anger my heart was burning with. From hundreds of miles away, other wolves howled back, mirroring the searing pain of my call. Yeah, yeah, my tribe was there for me, so was my family. It did not amount to much though. Nothing could help.

I started to run, faster than I had in ages. I was tracing wide circles around the area I could use, pushing my body harder and harder. I kept at it for almost an hour, until every muscle in my large wolf body was shaking. A typical werewolf, even the strongest of us, couldn’t hold such a crazy pace for more than half the time I had. Then again, I was way pumped up on fae blood, everything was different for me.

After sniffing the air for a few seconds, I gave chase again, tracking a hare I’d picked up on. Within minutes, I was biting down, pulling large chunks of bloody meat from the small, crumpled mold in my paws. Once my stomach was full, I went back to running in circles and did not stop until I collapsed on the ground, breathless and thirsty. I was exhausted, enough that my brain shut down and I could just pass out for a bit.

It was dark when I woke up. Not surprising seeing as it had already been afternoon in Tokyo when I’d flashed there. What was surprising was that I’d been able to spend hours sleeping. I shifted and promptly delivered my ass to my apartment, not wanting any of the wolves at the Alpha mansion to even think they should come out and find me. I did not want to talk to anyone, neither did I want to answer any questions.

Once I got back, all the reasons I’d chosen to leave my apartment rushed toward me, bringing fresh waves of pain to the forefront. It wasn’t as if the hurt ever left me. It was a constant buzzing that I could barely breathe through, but when faced with fresh triggers, sharp claws would reach for my chest, dive right in and start squeezing. I’d beg the gods for it to stop, but I knew it wouldn’t happen. I was a wolf who’d lost his mates, there was no rest, no peace, no happiness left in the world for me.

I got my clothes back on and stormed out of my apartment building. I couldn’t stay inside and I thought that a long, tiring walk through my city of birth might do the trick. I headed to Akihabara, convinced nothing could do a better job of keeping me distracted than geeks, cosplayers, and all other manga lovers. I knew of this maid café which was pretty well hidden and safe from most tourists and I planned on going there after my walk.

I took the longest way possible, although that particular neighborhood was pretty close to my apartment. Bright neon lights assaulted my eyes from every direction imaginable and I sighed. This area of Tokyo was exactly as I remembered it. Full of people walking aimlessly, most of them tourists or cosplayers, the latter either die-hards who did it because it was their passion, or those hired by the stores. It was always great to see my favorite anime characters come to life before me.

I roamed the bookstores, lingering in the manga sections. Unlike my other visits, I stayed clear of the yaoi section. I really did not need to see any gay couple getting their happy ending, even if it was just a comic book story. Luckily, I was safe here. Not much male on male PDA out of Ni-chome, so I wouldn’t have to deal with too vivid a memory of how we used to be with each other. Wolves are tactile by definition. In our animal form, we rub against each other, lick each other’s muzzles, run together, pounce and tackle each other. That translates into our human form behavior and my mates had always indulged me.

The next place I stopped at was a video game arcade. I chose a