All in the Name of Love

By Tamara V. Ester

Jasmine has been nothing less than a loving spouse to her estranged husband Patrick. She continues to stand by her man regardless of the abuse and the adultery. She, no doubt, suffers from low self esteem and is a victim of disrespect from not only Patrick but his lovers as well. Patrick who is nothing but a mommas boy has no respect for any woman other than his mother.

Jasmine takes Patrick back one last time after she finds out that she is pregnant. She is doing everything she possibly can to save her marriage; she has even considered accepting his illegitimate child. She has always wanted to have children of her own and is devastated when she finds out about Patricks child. Patrick continues his infidelity only to push Jasmine further away from him.

Jasmine starts to love herself and finally accepts the fact that Patrick will never change. She finds solace in a man that shes recently met and is now putting her faith in God. She now realizes that she accepted Patricks abuse, not because she was a fool, but because it was all in the name of love.

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Jun 30, 2005
• ISBN: 9781420898538

Tamara V. Ester

Tamara is a native of Lima, Ohio. She is an aspiring author who hopes that one day her own life experiences will inspire the lives of others. She gives tribute to the Lord for blessing her with her poetic gift of writing and providing her with the provisions needed to write this novel. Her faith in the Lords word is solid and it was through faith that she conceived two beautiful children. She loves to write poetry and has a poem published by The International Library of Poetry. Tamara is thankful for the support that everyone has given her, especially her family and friends. She would like to give a special thanks to Lebarron Springer for his editorial work and his guidance with "All in the name of love."

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© 2005 by Tamara V. Ester. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without written permission from the author.

ISBN: 1-4208-9853-1 (Electronic)

ISBN: 1-4208-9852-3 (Softcover)

ISBN: 978-1-4208-9853-8 (eBook)

First published by AuthorHouse 06/24/05

Contents

Acknowledgements

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

About the Author

This book is dedicated to my two beautiful children,

Aejha & Amihr.

If you could look into a looking glass

To see what love looks like

It should be a wonderful thing

A kind and pleasant sight

But if your looking glass shows you

Something other than this scene

Destroy that looking glass at once

For pain it might just bring

LOVE-1 CORINTHIANS 13

Acknowledgements

First and foremost, I would like to thank God for his many blessings because of his grace and mercy I am here today.

I would like to say a special thank you to those who have inspired me to create many of the characters, though this story is fiction. You know who you are, so don’t take it personal; My girls, Ann and TC (my parents), Rita, LaJuan, Crystal, and Kaye (my sisters), Ladybug and James (May you rest in peace), and Blue (I can’t forget you).

I would like to thank those of you who encouraged me to do this and kept pushing when I would stop; My Family (no doubt), Mrs. Martha (keep holding the block down), Chiffon (I can’t forget you, I appreciate everything), Ms. Renae Johnson (we will meet someday), Pastor Robert L. Curtis Jr. (Your words have inspired me more than you know, even if you didn’t know), Shawn Scott(thanks for the advice) and Sharika Washington (keep writing).

To a dear and wonderful person Mr. Labarron Springer (my editor), I thank you for everything.

Again, I thank my sisters for their great contributions, and everything that they have done, I love you all.

For those of you that are not mentioned, you are not forgotten.

Chapter One

The sun was shining bright this morning. It was one of those mornings that most people looked forward to facing. I knew by the churning in the pit of my stomach that things wouldn’t be so great for me in the hours to come. I knew it before I opened the blinds to let in the sunshine. When I rolled oVer in bed, this morning, the space where my husband usually lay had been empty. I fought back the tears and tried not to think of where he could have been.

I hoped that a long hot bath would help get my day started. I added a little bit of coconut oil and some coconut foam to the steamy water. I’d been neglecting myself and decided that it was time for a change. I walked on my treadmill for thirty minutes, mainly because when I saw myself in the mirror my stomach looked like a big tub of lard. I couldn’t believe that I had gotten so out of shape. If you didn’t know me, you might have thought that I had given birth to two or three babies. I thought about swallowing a couple of laxatives to clean out my system but decided against it since I already had that churning in my stomach.

When I sank into the water, the heat brought instant thoughts of the baths that I’d taken with Patrick. I like my bath water lukewarm rather than hot. Therefore, we would always argue about the temperature, of course, he would win. When he finished making love to me the water would be nice and warm just the way I like it.

My hair was just fine. I was wearing a sewed in bob style straw set that turned heads everywhere I went. I knew that a new wardrobe would just set things off for me but shopping had begun to depress me. I’d gained so much weight since I left college that I was a dial tone away from calling Jenny Craig. I decided that it was time to give up on the Junior/Miss sections and start shopping in the Women’s section. I can’t wear anything that shows too much of this gut and these boobs are huge.

When I was dressed and looking half way decent, I heard Patrick at the door fumbling with his keys. I snatched my purse and headed toward the door. I wanted to look him in the eyes. I wanted to see the guilty glare that those brown eyes reserved. I have been married to this man for almost four years; the past three of them have been nothing but pure hell. I was standing there shaking like a leaf when he came into the house. Excuse me I need to get to the bathroom, Patrick said, with a look on his face that warned me to not say anything. I couldn’t believe it. I slammed the door as hard as I could, with hopes that he could hear the anger inside me. I was in tears before I could reach my car. I considered going back in the house to ask him where he’d been all night, but didn’t bother because the point was that he’d stayed out all night, again.

I drove to my friend Kim’s house. She has always given me a shoulder to cry on. I’ve been going through drama with Patrick so often that I think that Kim is getting tired of the same old sob story. I know that she cares about me but after giving her advice on my relationship there’s not much more that she can do.

What’s up, Jazz? Kim asked, when she answered the door. I wasn’t crying anymore so I didn’t bother telling her about Patrick.

I came to check on my girl, that’s all, I said.

Is there something wrong?

Naw, I said under my breath.

Oh well, give me a few minutes while I finish curling this frizzy hair, Kim said.

Kim has beautiful hair but she’s never been satisfied with it. She’s a small boned person but after her second child, she started to pick up a few pounds. She thinks that she’s fat now and sometimes that offends me because compared to her I look like a whale.

Kim’s uncle is my mom’s old man that’s how we came to know each other. It has always been Kim, Shawnda (another good friend of mine), and I. We have been through so much together. We weren’t bad kids but we weren’t good kids either. I suppose our parents figured that out when Kim had gotten pregnant at the age of fourteen. My mom instantly assumed that if Kim was doing it then I was too. On my fifteenth birthday, my gift from my mother was a trip to the Family Planning Clinic to get my first pack of birth control pills.

Now Shawnda, on the other hand, didn’t have anybody to get on her about those kinds of things. Her aunt raised her. Her mother was murdered when we were about thirteen years old. That was my first experience with death. I remember hearing the grown folk talk about the events that led up to her mother’s death. I tried to visualize Ms. Sharon lying in the middle of the street with nothing on but her panties, after being stabbed to death by her lover’s deranged wife. It’s a shame she wouldn’t leave that woman’s husband alone, or It takes two, it wasn’t no one sided affair, some of them would say. My friend Shawnda was an only child and I knew that she would need me. We instantly became as close as sisters.

When we graduated from high school, I broke up our trio and left for college. Seven months later, Patrick and I were married. Who would have ever though that Jasmine Evans and Patrick Carver would marry?

I fell in love with that man instantly. I’ve never been the kind of person to sleep around; therefore, when I gave myself to Patrick, I was his forever. When Patrick asked me to marry him, I didn’t think that he was serious. He proved how serious he was with a silver and gold 2 CT. diamond ring. I’d heard that his mother paid for it, but I didn’t care, as long as it was on my finger. From that point on, there was no turning back. I wanted to be the best wife that I could be and to totally submit myself to my husband. Jazz, how does my hair look? It’s fine, I said. I knew that it looked a mess. No it doesn’t, it looks good, I assured Kim. I hope so, ‘cause I’m on a man hunt. So have you heard from Doug? I could tell by the look on her face that I should not have brought his name up.

He called.

And, I said.

He said that he would be over around midnight and didn’t show up.

Girl, don’t even worry about it.

I’m not, because he’ll call me before I call him, Kim said. I wish that I could be as strong as she could.

How’s everything going in your marriage? I knew it was coming.

Same ole, same ole, I replied with a sigh. I was hoping that Kim would change the subject.

What do you want to do? I asked Kim.

I really don’t care because the kids are with my parents and I’m free to do whatever.

I guess we can just ride around for a while then. I said, while jingling my keys.

I looked good in my black on black with silver trim 2001-drop top Acura Legend. Most people in this small town of Lima, Ohio have nothing better to do than to burn their gas riding around town. You can circle our city in no more than thirty minutes so most of us know each other very well, if not related.

I stopped by my house after cruising around for a while. I needed to use the restroom. I was