Bar Scenes and Bad Dreams: Lost and Found Loves

By Scott T. Bowers

The search for love may be a wonderful journey or fraught with peril. Once found, love can turn to emotional turmoil and pain when obstructions stand in the way. This poetic journey by the author of Save Your Son: A Tale of Arthur gives the reader a touching insight into the poet's sometimes lovely and other times disheartening search for his perfect love.

• Language: English
• Publisher: iUniverse
• Release date: Jan 30, 2001
• ISBN: 9781469789026

Scott T. Bowers

Scott Bowers is the author of the Authurian novel Save Your Son: A Tale of Arthur. He was born in New Castle, PA and currently resides in Denver, CO. This is his first collection of poetry.

Book preview

The Fool

I.

She’s staring out the window

Wondering if she’s pretty

I shout it at the top of my lungs

Knowing she’ll not hear me anyway

She hasn’t heard it in a while.

Jubilant as the babe is young

She brightens up my world

Knowing hearts will lead us

Some enchanted eve, full moon aglow

To the culmination of our affinity.

To see her in her beauty

Moon upon her breast

Her lips in quivering kisses

Feathers upon my chest

Lost in careless bliss.

To touch her fair white skin

Like no mortal has done before

Feeling her natural instinct

To arch and ask for more

The touch that is the cure.

Thunder peals in heaven

The skies begin to part

Lightning reaches earthward

And brushes both our hearts

Destiny plays out its part.

Spent, we find compassion

In each other’s arms

The feelings of a lifetime

Keeping one another warm

The Mother Goddess keeping us safe from harm.

The gods themselves would marvel

At the passion struck that night

When the two became one

As is fitting and truly right

For this I dream with all my might.

Yes, she is still pretty

And my feelings are the same

I keep them locked inside now

To keep her from the pain

She hasn’t heard it in a while.

II.

The little things you do

A fleeting touch of my hand

A sparkling gleam in your eye

A secret smile

These are the moments that I treasure.

The effort to be sincere

And not to play me false

Swells my affection.

The human touch

Of confusion towards my advances

Of appreciation at untold cost

Of a different love that binds

These are the traits that bring me near.

The days of separation

Pass like winter months

Grey, but filled with dreams of Spring.

The life that you rebuff

By your sense of commitment

By your definition of love

By your fear of adventure

These will arrest your growth.

The effort you put forth

To understand me

Confirms your deep compassion.

III.

Tonight I celebrated

Smoking the stash I hid for months

I hide it from myself

To remember it on better days.

I spent the day among friends

But chiefly with her

Does she use me when he’s gone?

I hope so, its the best I can do.

I dance with her at weddings

Even though we never touch

Someone might see us

They suspect so much.

She invades my work

I see her everywhere

Of course, I live the fantasy

And its really just my dreams.

I never really dreamed of her

Until she said goodbye

Now I spend restless nights

Awakened by reality

She’s influenced my life

The changes brought me back

To realizing that my vision

Is real and attainable.

IV.

I long to see her wake in the morning

To watch her brush her teeth

To wash her face

The natural beauty of her life.

These things are denied to me,

A relationship born too late

And granted another.

To see her slip out of her clothes

Or slide her arms through her sweater

To tie her shoes.

The simple things of her life.

This would mean more to me

Than any other gain

But granted another.

To watch her help with homework

And push them off to bed

To kiss them goodnight.

The gentle things of her life.

This would be reward to me

Beyond my worldly success

Still granted to another.

Does she need me as I do her?

I wonder to myself

Does she long to be in my life

Or does she find it base with stealth?

Do I fill the void that comes with age

A plaything to toss when done

A fool to bring on laughter

That cries when found alone.

Nonetheless,

She moves me to distraction

All else pales in her light

I’d play the fool and relish it

To gain the end I crave

Melancholy is the illness

That drives this man to rave.

V.

Reality is generous

It treats me like a friend

Life may be strange

But I seem to come out in the end

Constant controversy

Should play out