Damaged Souls The Exploitation of Society’s Most Vulnerable

By Alice Walsh

Phillip McGraw of the Dr. Phil show defines psychopaths, sociopaths and other bad characters as BAITERs, an acronym for Backstabbers/Abusers/Imposters/Takers/Exploiters/Reckless people. However, despite his contempt for such people, McGraw has at one time or another exhibited many of their characteristics. Those who have done business with the reality show host have questioned his loyalty, calling him a Backstabber. On his show, he has paraded troubled families in front of cameras to belittle, mock and verbally Abuse them. As much as he likes to present himself as a straight shooter—a “good old country boy” who tells it like it is— many see him as an Imposter who has covered up his own ugly past. People who feel they were ripped off during McGraw’s shady business deals in the 1970s will agree he is a Taker. In a bid for ratings, he has often breached professional ethics, Exploiting vulnerable people—including children. The National Alliance for the Mentally Ill labeled McGraw’s actions as Reckless after he diagnosed a child as a potential serial killer on television. Damaged Souls poses the question: Is there a limit on how far McGraw will go to earn ratings for his reality show?

• Language: English
• Publisher: Alice Walsh
• Release date: Jun 16, 2018
• ISBN: 9780993849664

Book preview

Damaged Souls

The Exploitation of Society’s Most Vulnerable

Alice Walsh

Damaged Souls

Copyright © 2018 Alice Walsh

The moral right of the author has been asserted.

This book is licensed for your personal enjoyment only.

All rights reserved, including the right to reproduce this book, or a portion thereof, in any form except for the use of brief quotations in articles or reviews. This book may not be resold or uploaded for distribution to others.

Cover Design: Malcolm Carter

E-book Formatter: Lucinda Campbell

Editors: Jackie Jardine & David Banks

ISBN-

CADD Publishing

Table of Contents

DEDICATION

Introduction

Chapter 1: Backstabber

Chapter 2: Abuser

Chapter 3: Imposter

Chapter 4: Taker

Chapter 5: Exploiter

Chapter 6: Reckless

About The Author

DEDICATION

For Jean (Gould) Carter

My Huckaberry Friend

Damaged Souls

Introduction

There is a certain irony in writing a book warning of exploiters and takers while using vulnerable people to publicize that same work. In Life Code; the New Rules for Winning in the Real World, Phil McGraw of the Dr. Phil show defines psychopaths, sociopaths and other bad characters as BAITERs, an acronym for Backstabbers/Abusers/ Imposters/Takers/Exploiters/ Reckless people. To help identify those destructive people, he lists characteristics which he calls the Evil Eight.1

BAITERs are arrogant, entitled people who thrive on drama and crisis. They steal, cheat and manipulate without empathy or remorse and will even brag about taking advantage of others. BAITERs are two-faced liars and gossips who pretend to be your friend, but will stab you in the back. Life Code’s message is to learn how to spot those bad actors before they can do real harm. To inoculate against such evil, McGraw recommends adopting the Sweet 16. Basically, this means creating a perception of uniqueness and learning to accept praise. Potential victims need always be in an investigative mode and never give anyone the benefit of the doubt. These strategies are based on behaviors of successful people who McGraw brags he has been studying since he was twelve years old.2

To be fair, McGraw has done some good. His television show, Dr. Phil, has been instrumental in making the public aware of missing loved ones. At times, he has given a voice to those who feel they have been wronged by the criminal justice system and other institutions. In 2016 he interviewed Lesley McSpadden, mother of Michael Brown, a black unarmed teen who was shot by police officers in Ferguson, Missouri. He gave the broken-hearted mother a platform to share her story and express her grief.

Many, however, see McGraw’s actions as callous and reckless. His critics have accused him of taking advantage of his guest by filming them at their worse.3 Others see him as a modern-day Barnum shamelessly exploiting the broken, addicted, mentally ill and other damaged guests. Dr. Phil shows us that there is no depth below which he will not sink to improve his ratings, says Dr. Jeff Sugar, a professor at USC’s Keck School of Medicine. His designation as America’s ‘psychologist’ can’t be taken seriously.4

Chapter 1: Backstabber

Whenever Thelma Box watches McGraw on his television show giving advice and urging people to take responsibility for their actions, she hears echoes of Pathways, a seminar she and McGraw founded decades earlier. In fact, the material from McGraw’s best-selling book, Life Strategies, uses the same ideas and methods. The phrases and the terminology and the quaint sayings—that’s right out of the program, said David Dickenson, a colleague who helped Box organize Pathways. Although the structure and most of the creative ideas for the seminar came from Box, McGraw has never acknowledged the role she played in his success. Phil wanted people to believe the seminars came from him, Dickenson said. His fear was that he would be exposed as not being the guru he put himself up to being.1

Box and McGraw became friends in the early 1980s. Divorced with four young children, Box owned and operated a motel. In addition, she sold insurance and real estate. McGraw often approached her with proposals for business deals he thought they could launch together. By this time, he had already experimented with weight loss programs, pain clinics, executive recruiting and witness testimony.

To further develop her personal and professional growth, Box attended motivational seminars facilitated by Zig Ziglar, Dale Carnegie and other self-help gurus who were popular during that era. I saw a lot of positive things happening in the seminars that weren’t happening in individual therapy,2 she says. She approached McGraw with the idea of launching a seminar for single mothers. As a clinical psychologist, he had held similar seminars with small groups in his practice. Realizing the idea had potential, McGraw urged Box to further develop the concept.

Months into the planning, McGraw announced he would be bringing in his father, Joe McGraw (also a clinical psychologist), as an equal shareholder. Getting his dad involved gave Phil more control, says Box. However, when she protested the unfairness, McGraw told her she could either do things his way or he would do the seminar without her. Feeling backed into a corner, she reluctantly agreed to let Joe McGraw in on the deal.

Although Box describes McGraw as charismatic and outgoing, he was not imaginative or creative. Most of the ideas for the seminar came from her. I get an idea and I take off with it, she says. She sometimes borrowed concepts from other seminars, built on them and tweaked them to her liking. By combining Box’s creative ideas and life experience with McGraw’s clinical expertise, in 1983 they launched You Seminars Inc. which later became Pathways.

Initially, they met in small hotels. The first seminar had 64 people, Box recalls. Most of the participants were relatives, friends, neighbors and clients from McGraw’s practice. They had hoped to present two or three seminars a year, but the program quickly developed into a successful venture and full-time business. By the late 1980s, as many as 1,000 people were paying up to $1,000 to attend a weekend seminar. Weekends were more of a teaser, says Box, a way to lure people in to attend the five-day seminar.

By 1990, McGraw and his attorney, Gary Dobbs, had established Courtroom Sciences Inc. (CSI), a litigation consulting firm. The business involved consulting with legal professionals, conducting mock trials, preparing witnesses on the stand and finding ways to influence jury members. McGraw began drifting away from Pathways, hiring assistants to help out in his absence. By now, his father, Joe was ready to retire.

Box assumed that once McGraw left the business, he would bring in an employee and she would continue with the program. She also assumed he would sell his share to her. However, without a word to anyone, McGraw sold his third interest in the program to Steve Davidson who had been filling in as a speaker at Pathways. The agreement stated that the deal was to remain confidential. It was a full year after the sale before Box or the elder McGraw found out about it. A disgruntled secretary in Davidson’s office faxed a document with details of the $325,000 deal. Box was left with three options: She could continue to be a one-third interest partner with the new owners. She could sell to them and sign a non-compete agreement, or she could walk with nothing and start her own seminar. I believed them to have a different integrity level from me, she says, "and I chose not to be their partner. I walked."

Box never looked back. After turning her back on Pathways, she started her own seminar, Choices, which has become very successful in both Canada and the United States. Although she holds no grudges, Box still recalls how blindsided she was by McGraw’s backstabbing. She