A PhD Rollercoaster: A Diary of The Ups And Downs of Being a Doctoral Student
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About this ebook
What's it really like to do a PhD? There are lots of books of the 'how to' variety for organising yourself, dealing with supervisors, and writing papers and theses. But what about the emotional journey? What about the changes to your health, your social life, and your relationships with those closest to you? What about all the mistakes you make while trying to figure things out? And what if you're not sure about life as an academic, what then?
Researcher and writer Nilam McGrath passed her PhD with no corrections, and then spent a decade helping PhD students navigate their PhD journey through her popular Ups and Downs of PhDs workshop. In this book, she weaves together her personal PhD experiences with those of her workshop participants, with one clear message for all doctoral students: YOU ARE NOT ALONE.
If you've ever felt lonely, isolated, stressed or just down-right confused at any point during your PhD, then this no-nonsense book, with its TOP TIPS and LEARNING POINTS from each year, will reassure you that it happens to the best of us, and that there is light and (a good) life at the end of the dark, anxiety-ridden tunnel.
Read about the tears, tantrums and TV habits that led to Nilam taking a leap of faith at the end of her PhD rollercoaster.
Reviews: visit Nilam's website to read more reviews of A PhD Rollercoaster.
'I think this book is going to be a source of comfort to a lot of people at a very stressful time in their lives.' Dr Matt Greenwood-Nimmo, University of Melbourne.
'This diary captures beautifully the psychological highs and lows, rewards and frustrations of doing a PhD. It challenges some academic conventions and the restrictions they can place on the student. This is balanced with practical suggestions such as 'read outside of your discipline' and explore whether you want to be a researcher or an academic as this will influence the decisions you make. There is an overall tone of optimism that even when the 'going may be tough' completing a PhD is a positive personal and professional experience that will help you influence and create your professional future.' Dr Elaine McNichol, University of Leeds.
'This well-written, candid and engaging account of one person's PhD journey should prove a valuable resource for current PhD students, individuals considering doctoral study, and those responsible for the supervision, professional development and pastoral care of PGRs. I found myself identifying with several of the experiences and emotions, some of which are not always easy to 'own-up-to' as a research student. I wish this book had been available when I was doing my PhD.' Dr Caroline Hodges, University of Bournemouth.
'Every PhD student should read this one. It's the untold story of the personal and emotional rollercoaster that will be yours, but fear not, Nilam will help you through it. All PhD life is here.' Prof Anne Gregory, University of Huddersfield.
'A PhD Rollercoaster should be mandatory reading for PhD students across disciplines! By cracking the lid on the often opaque and intertwined social, emotional, physical, and professional challenges of completing a PhD, this book provides a platform to think about doing academia differently, in more healthful ways. Nilam so artfully (and delightfully humorously) uses her own personal diary kept throughout the course of her PhD to draw out insights and perspective that will no doubt be useful to anyone embarking on the PhD journey, as well as those guiding students through it.' Dr Stephanie Coen, Queen's University, Canada.
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Reviews for A PhD Rollercoaster
7 ratings1 review
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Easy to read and very relatable. Touches on the human aspect very well which in my opinion is ignored often in many guides. Thank you for the well-thought out advice, and makes me feel at ease before starting the PhD!
Book preview
A PhD Rollercoaster - Nilam McGrath
A PhD Rollercoaster
A Diary of The Ups And Downs of Being a Doctoral Student
Nilam McGrath, PhD.
Copyright © 2017 Nilam McGrath
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the author and publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other non-commercial uses permitted by copyright law.
ISBN: 978-1-9997465-0-6 (EPUB)
Get updates and previews of all forthcoming books at www.nilammcgrath.com
Fiction by Nilam McGrath
Schrödinger's Cat May or May Not Have Been Here
Rouen (a short story)
Cover design by Vecteezy.com
Hello
I’m here to tell you that it’s OK. The stresses you’re experiencing right now – although all consuming – are part of your PhD journey and will eventually subside. Of course, hindsight is a wonderful thing. It’s been nine years since I finished my PhD, and when I finished, I remember thinking that there was so much I wish someone had told me about what it’s really like to do a PhD. Yes, there are lots of books of the ‘how to’ variety for organising yourself, dealing with supervisors and writing papers and research proposals. But what about the emotional journey? What about the changes in your health, your social life, and your relationships with those closest to you? And what about all the mistakes you make while trying to figure things out? What if you’re not sure about life as an academic? What then?
When I got awarded my PhD, I started designing The Ups and Downs of PhDs workshop because I just wanted to pass on some advice. The sessions developed over time, and offered a safe space for students to voice concerns about how they were coping with their PhD, and enabled them to get advice from each other on the big and small stuff that kept them awake at night. The starting point for my workshop was my own PhD journey, which I talked through using a timeline. I have put some of this online in a Prezi format (Nilam’s PhD Rollercoaster, 2012), and this book elaborates on some of my personal journey and draws on edited extracts from the diary I was keeping during my PhD. Yes, that’s right; I kept a personal diary throughout the whole three years. Some entries are more factual (a polite way of saying that they are bit dry), some are (heavily edited) rants, but mostly they are about my anxiety and confusion about the whole PhD process and about life after graduating. The diary extracts and accompanying narrative highlight the options and challenges I felt I had as an experienced practitioner returning to academia, as well as reflections about the coping strategies that, in hindsight, I could have used.
Hindsight is a wonderful thing. The journey can be a bumpy ride – more of a rollercoaster than a smooth, upward learning curve followed by a gentle glide back down to earth. Like-minded students will help you make sense of what is happening. I hope you can take something useful from my experience, and I also hope it doesn’t put anyone off signing up for a PhD. I still think (even with the ups and downs) that it was an important part of my personal journey, and that it has given me ‘that extra something’ that clients look for in my particular field. I’m glad I did it.
Nilam
Disclaimer
This book is a memoir. The content of this book draws on my personal diary for chronological and narrative structure, as well as plenary discussions during the workshops I ran for nine years, to emphasise the highs and lows of PhD life as commonly experienced by many PhD students.
The names and characteristics of people have been merged and changed, and so too have some events, to respect peoples’ privacy and identities: I am protecting the innocent.
The book contains references to ‘my supervisor’ and this character represents an amalgam of the supervision and mentorship I received from many people both during and after my PhD. I couldn’t have honed my thesis, or this book, without their support and encouragement. They have been hugely supportive of my creative projects since graduating, for which I am very thankful.
Ultimately, this is a book about me, my anxieties and my confusion through what was a stressful period in my life, so the only person under the spotlight is me. I recognise fully that everyone will have their own memories of events, and as such, my memories are entirely subjective recollections of my experiences over time, and only my own recollections, rather than a statement of fact.
In the beginning…
The story of how I ended up doing a PhD isn’t a new one, but it is unusual in that it was a quick decision on my part, with the planets aligned in my favour. I hadn’t considered further study in the slightest, but I was looking for another job as I had been on a string of temporary contracts in the charity sector in the UK. I was definitely in need of something more long-term. I was in London delivering a four-day training course on Inspiring Change (of all things). One night, I went back to my hotel with a copy of the UK’s The Guardian newspaper and saw a scholarship advertised: a PhD in Communications. You know when you see something that makes your heart beat a little faster? Well, this was that moment for me. My brain started ticking over, almost as soon as I saw the advert, at the thought of leaving my job and going back to being closer to communications work. My training job had moved me too far from what I had studied and trained to do – writing and editing – and what I had been doing for 12 years before taking on any contract to stave off redundancy and unemployment. This could be my chance to re-enter the communications sector at a higher level.
While I was writing this book, I saw a question on Twitter asking doctoral candidates why they had decided to do their PhD. I replied that it was because I knew the world would open up for me, and that it has (lots of likes, obviously) and that is genuinely how I felt when I saw the advert. The opportunity seemed a bit too good to be true as well. It was a fully funded scholarship, plus it was at a university an hour from where I lived so I could commute each day. I’d never seen any type of scholarship in this subject advertised