Forgetting Yesterday: Broken by the Sea, #1

By Ava Wood

Missy Shaw thought she had her life planned out perfectly; do well in school, take her basketball team to state, and get a free ride to college. Her life wasn’t perfect, but it was constant. With her best friend Karley at her side, she could handle anything.

After the death of her mother, however, her dad had other plans. Moving Missy from everything she knew in Kansas to the great unknown created a new set of problems. Attending a new school, all she really wanted was to be invisible, but that simple feat proved difficult when she has a run-in with the school’s basketball star, Adam Miller, on her very first day.

Adam Miller is every girls dream; charming, sweet, and gorgeous. And for some reason he’s very interested in Missy. His attentiveness is unnerving as Missy does everything in her power to evade his interest. Living with secrets she’s not willing to share, Missy works to push Adam away in order to keep her family safe. But will keeping secrets really keep her safe?

• Language: English
• Publisher: Ava Wood
• Release date: Oct 28, 2016
• ISBN: 9781540106094

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Copyright Notice

Forgetting Yesterday

Ava Wood

Copyright © 2014 by Ava Wood

Designed by: Woodward Photography

Edited by: Red Road Editing Services

Formatted by: J. Laslie

Second Edition: April, 2016

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

Without limiting the rights under copyright reserved above, no part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise) without the prior written permission of both the copyright owner and the above publisher of this book. This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, brands, media, and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. The author acknowledges the trademarked status and trademark owners of various products referenced in this work of fiction, which have been used without permission. The publication/use of these trademarks is not authorized, associated with, or sponsored by the trademark owners.

For my girls. I love you with all my heart.

PROLOGUE

Don’t leave me, please. I love you, Deanna. You’re my world.

I could hear my father crying from inside of my bedroom. He was begging my mom to stay. She’d had enough and she was walking out the door again. I listened as the front door slammed and then heard my father fall to the floor, followed by his wretched sobs. I couldn’t take hearing how sad he was. I had to help him, to calm him down until my mom returned. I knew she’d come back; she had to. There was no way she would leave me behind without saying goodbye. I refused to believe she could ever be that cold. It didn’t matter right now. I had to take care of my dad. He needed me.

I unlocked my door and crept into the living room, looking at the wreckage before me. Picture frames and knickknacks had been shoved off the mantle and glass was everywhere. This was the worst I’d ever seen my home. My parents fought a lot, always using their fists in anger, but it had never gotten this bad before. I snuck over to my father and saw blood dripping from his hands. He was clenching and unclenching them as he cried my mother’s name over and over.

Deanna. His voice was soft and broken. Deanna, please.

I watched him rock back and forth as his hands continued to open and close and instinctively reached for him. When my hand met his shoulder, the rocking stopped. He gasped and said my mother’s name once more before he looked up and saw me standing next to him. I wasn’t surprised to see the red outline of my mother’s hand on his cheek as he latched onto my legs and continued crying.

Oh, Missy. I could feel his blood and tears dripping down my calves.

Dad, let me clean you up. You’re bleeding. I stroked his frazzled chestnut hair, trying to ease his tears.

It doesn’t matter. She left me, Missy. He was stuck in his sorrow and I had to get him out.

Dad, please. Let me look at your hands. I tried to squat down to inspect him, but he refused to let me go, hanging on to my legs for dear life.

She’s gone. My Deanna’s gone.

Shh, Dad, she’ll come back. I continued to stroke his hair, trying to calm him down, hoping he would see reason.

Oh, Missy. He looked up at me with his bloodshot green eyes.

I could tell I was definitely getting through to him. He was finally looking at me. I reached for his hands and pulled him from the ground, wrapping his arm around me and leading him to the kitchen. Does it feel like there’s glass in your hand?

It doesn’t matter.

Dad, you have to stop. You don’t want Mom to find you like this when she gets back. You know how she gets, she just needs time to cool off. She’ll be back. I promise.

Fine. He leaned against the counter next to the sink and I took his hands in mine, turning them over to look for any lingering broken glass.

I think it’s all out. You just wash your hands while I get the first aid kit. I turned the water on warm and ran to the bathroom to fetch the kit before he fell apart again. I knew I couldn’t leave him for long, because he would be a complete mess if he was left to wallow in his sorrows alone. When I returned with the kit in hand, he was dabbing a paper towel over one of the cuts, a few stray tears dripping down his face. I took another paper towel from the roll and began to gently wipe away his tears. It’ll be okay, Dad. I promise.

I bandaged his hands and took him to bed, tucking him in alone. He tried to fight me, but didn’t have the strength. I laid with him for quite a while, listening to his quiet sobs and unsteady breaths. It took some time, but I stayed with him until he was fast asleep, then kissed his forehead and headed to my room to wait for my mom’s return. When I switched on my bedroom light, I heard a knock at the front door. It was too late for any of my friends to drop by and my mom never knocked, even in her worst moments. I turned my light back off and tiptoed through the house, peeking out of the peephole to see who was on the other side. A sheriff stood outside my door, scanning the area, probably looking for any lights on in the house. The only light left on was the one in the hall that I always left burning when my mom was out late. There was a deputy behind him standing stock still, staring at the door. He looked vaguely familiar, but in the past I typically hid when the police showed up. Something pulled at me this time, demanding I open the door. I slowly pulled it open to greet the sheriff on the other side and he immediately looked surprised to see me.

Good evening, miss. Is your father here? He had that I’m-in-charge demeanor about him and though I didn’t recognize him, he seemed to know my house well.

Is everything alright, sheriff?

I need to speak with your father please, ma’am.

Ma’am? I’d never been called that before. He’s sleeping. Do I have to wake him? Please don’t make me wake him. I’ve just gotten him calmed down.

I’m afraid so. It’s an urgent matter.

Just a moment.

I refrained from rolling my eyes when I left the sheriff and his deputy standing on my front porch. I still hadn’t had a chance to clean up the wreckage from my parents’ fight and I couldn’t let him see what a disaster the house was. I couldn’t imagine why they were here, but my mind went to the worst possible theory. My mother must have gone to the authorities after the fight this time and turned my dad in. They must be here to arrest him. This is great, just great.

I woke my dad up, which took some doing because he was already in a pretty deep sleep, but I finally revived him. I was tempted to leave the men standing outside to save my dad, but I figured they’d bust in before long, so I led him to the door with a heavy heart. As he rubbed at his bloodshot eyes, I opened the door.

Mr. Shaw?

Yes. My dad tried to stifle a yawn, but failed.

Mind if we come in?

Perfect. The officers were going to see the mess that my parents made. There’d be no denying the fight they had if he saw the broken glass all over the floor. I had to do something.

Sure. My dad started, but I busted in.

Why don’t you gentlemen sit at the kitchen table? I’ll make some tea. I had to cut him off before he led them right into our den of chaos.

That won’t be necessary.

Well, come in. Come in. I ushered the two officers into our kitchen, followed by my dad, who had given me a very confused look when I suggested the kitchen table. He followed behind me, but didn’t say a word. Sit here. I pulled out a chair for the sheriff then one for the deputy and my dad sat across from them. He was still staring at me skeptically, but he took the seat I offered him. I’ll be right back. I had to clean up the living room before the sheriff or his deputy started nosing around.

Ma’am, why don’t you sit down?

He called me ma’am again. That’s alright–

Sit down, please. His voice grew commanding.

Something was up. Have I done something wrong? Am I in trouble too? Okay. I sat next to my father, who barely looked awake.

I’m so terribly sorry to have to do this, but– The sheriff’s voice grew quieter. This was it. He was taking my dad to jail. Mr. Shaw, I’m afraid your wife was killed in an automobile accident.

I saw my dad’s eyes shoot open, as I prepared for them to take him away, but that wasn’t why they were here. My mom was gone, dead. My dad was right. She’s gone. I sat staring at the sheriff, watching his mouth move, but I couldn’t hear a sound. My shock consumed me as I imagined my future without a mother. I couldn’t even picture Christmases without my mom passing out presents or birthdays when she’d splurge on one perfect gift to show me how much she loved me. I was frozen in place, surrounded by silence, when my father’s cries finally broke through.

DEANNA, NO! he screamed for my mother and I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know how to calm him this time, because she was gone, really gone, and she wasn’t coming back. I tried to hold my father’s hands, but I had no control over my own limbs; I couldn’t even lift my arms. My mother had left us and we would never see her again.

The officers mumbled their condolences and eventually left my father and me just staring at the kitchen table, waiting. I don’t even know what we were waiting for, but neither of us moved until the sun was high in the sky the next day. I don’t remember much of the following twenty-four hours, but I know they were quite lonely; my father and I barely spoke to each other.

I finally found the motivation to clean up the glass pieces all over the living room and, as I swept them into the dustpan, I finally began to cry.

CHAPTER ONE

How are you holding up? My best friend Karley walked into my room unannounced. It was pretty standard for her.

I’m alright. Just packing up the last of my stuff now. I wasn’t alright, but then again, what teenager is after losing her mother? She’d only been gone a couple of months, but it felt like an eternity, and my dad couldn’t be bothered to try and make things easier. He was too busy moving us out east to get away from the memories of her.

I can’t believe you’re leaving, Missy. Karley sat on my bed, picking at the frayed edges of my hand-me-down quilt.

I can hardly believe it myself. This isn’t how my life was supposed to be. I plopped down next to the best friend I’d had since first grade and imagined the life we’d dreamt of having. We were supposed to play basketball together and win the state championship. Now I’m being shipped off to some uptight school in the middle of hurricane central where I don’t know a soul. I was depressed. I’ve had my whole life planned out since the seventh grade and my dad moving us away wasn’t part of the plan.

What are we going to do without you? There isn’t another point guard in Hesston High School that can fill your shoes.

Come on, Karley. Trina isn’t that bad.

When’s the last time Trina made a shot outside the arc? She’s a mess.

I shrugged because I knew Karley was right. Trina needed a lot of work, but she’d have to put that time in now if our team stood a chance of winning the championship. I had to remind myself that it wasn’t our team anymore. I was leaving in the morning for territories unknown, being fed to the wolves by my own father.

You okay, Missy? Karley could read me like a book.

I will be. I couldn’t let her worry about me any more than usual. She was the one person who knew my secret. It was a secret we never talked about, but I knew it was what she was referring to now. This move will be good for my dad and that will be good for me. I kept trying to convince myself that when we got away from here, my dad could finally be a father to me. I had pushed all of my fear aside, certain all he really needed was just to get away from the ghosts in this house.

Karley’s eyes looked away briefly. Email me every day. Tell me about the new school and the boys and–

I got it. I had to stop her, because she would go on forever if I let her. I hoped my dad would let me use his laptop since emailing her was the least I could do, especially since he was the one who sold my phone and computer after he lost his job. In all honesty, I think I was born about twenty years too late, so I wasn’t that heartbroken when my electronics were taken away. Karley was more upset about it being gone than I ever could be. She was just relieved that she’d always been able to get me on our landline and let that be enough.

Okay. She flashed me the same half-smile she’d been giving me since the day she found out we were moving. Like it was her life that was being ripped from the pages of the Hesston Record and being uprooted to move halfway across the country.

I’m sorry. I know this is hard on you, too. It’s just that you’re going to be here, with everyone we’ve known since elementary school, and I’ll be in Florida with palm trees. I hated the thought of palm trees with their pointy fronds and stupid-looking trunks. I wasn’t at all convinced that they were actually trees to begin with.

Palm trees aren’t that bad. Maybe you’ll learn to like them.

I rolled my eyes at that. Are you going to help me finish packing or what?

Karley laughed because she knew I wasn’t serious. I could never be authoritative. I was too quiet for that. When she was done laughing, she helped me finish packing up the rest of my room, then headed home for the night. I would only see her one more time before we made the drive to the bowels of Florida.

SceneBreak

Dad’s truck was completely loaded down with the last of everything I refused to leave behind. He’d actually walked away from my childhood home with a single suitcase of clothes. It was like he couldn’t wait to forget my mom.

When I walked out of my house, Karley was at the curb, fresh tears in her eyes. I ran up to her and grabbed her as tightly as I could, filling my senses with memories of her: her strawberry-scented and wavy blonde hair, the sound of her voice, the way her gray eyes looked as she tried to stop crying. I couldn’t believe this was it. I was losing everything I had left of the life I’d always known.

Come on, Missy. I don’t want to hit traffic. My dad hated driving in the city, but he knew there was no avoiding it on our drive to Florida, so he wanted to try and make good time. If it were up to me, we wouldn’t leave at all.

I walked to the passenger side of the truck and Karley followed me. Before I got into my dad’s truck, she squeezed me one last time and said good-bye. I was doing my best not to cry until that moment. Hearing her say the words I’d been dreading had my tears billowing out. I reluctantly pulled away when my dad started to clear his throat and climbed into the truck.

This was it. We were leaving Kansas for good. I rolled down my window, remembering the package I’d hidden in the toolshed out back. Before my dad pulled out of the drive, I yelled, There’s something for you in the toolshed. I’ll talk to you soon. I forced one last smile and my dad sped away, my childhood home fading away in the side-view mirror.

My eyes opened when my dad killed the engine.

I’m stopping for the night.

He handed me a motel key card and walked away without another word. I knew where he was going. It was the one place he could drown all of the memories of my mother. I’m sure spending an entire day with thoughts of her consumed him, and I couldn’t blame him for wanting to get her off of his mind. She was his world and now she was gone, forever.

I grabbed an overnight bag I’d packed and headed to the room number on the key card’s envelope. An olive door with chipped paint greeted me as I slipped the card in and waited for the little green light. Right when the door unlocked, I slipped inside, flipping a switch to illuminate a floor lamp in the room. I dropped my bag next to the nearest bed, threw back the comforter, and kicked off my shoes before climbing in. All I wanted was to sleep until this horrible nightmare was over. Unfortunately, my misery would still be here when I woke in the morning. I covered my head with the sheet and willed myself to sleep.

I woke to the sound of my motel room door being slammed against the wall. Slowly pulling the sheet off my head, I opened my eyes to find my dad stumbling into the room.

What are you looking at? My dad’s words were slurred as he stumbled again. A few steps inside, he fell to the ground, imploring me from the bed.

Are you okay? When I was a few feet away, I could already smell the liquor on his breath. I rushed to him and pulled him from the floor.

Get off of me. I don’t need your help, he yelled as he pushed me away and fell against the wall.

Dad, you’ve got to keep your voice down. I followed behind him as he stumbled the rest of the way to the bed and fell face first on the toxic motel comforter. My stomach turned thinking of all of the microscopic vermin crawling all over it, but my dad had already passed out and there would be no moving him now. I was a lot stronger than my statuesque frame looked, but when my dad was passed out, there was no moving his more than two-hundred-pound dead weight.

I switched off the floor lamp and tiptoed back to my bed, listening to the sound of highway traffic until I finally fell back to sleep.

A gentle, calloused hand stroked across my forehead and, as my eyes opened, I could see the faintest strip of sunlight peeking out from the motel room curtains.

Time to wake up, baby girl. My dad was up and, no doubt, ready for the next leg of our trip. He had a cup of coffee in his hand and I could just barely make out the steam rolling off the top.

Good morning, Dad. I stretched my arms and sat up in bed, looking at the bedside clock to check the time. I’d actually slept until ten.

Come on, Missy. We need to get on the road. We’re losing daylight.

I nodded my head and crawled out of bed, grabbing my overnight bag and taking it to