Thanks Be to Bono

By Brent Barton and Stewart Stinson

THANKS BE TO BONO is the manifestoed memoir of Brent Barton, the so called controversial U2opian social activist and co-founder of TEMPLE, the organized religion.

Here, for the first time ever, Brent shares the story behind the rise of TEMPLE. From his early days of downtown street preaching, to the opening of the first wave of TEMPLE mega-plex multi-centers, and all the way through to the international advancement of the extravagantly ambitious U2opian agenda. Here Brent shares his thoughts on Africa, poverty, charity, religion, tolerance, respect, haters, extremists, reality, enlightenment, and the awesomeness of everything associated with the music of the rock'n roll band U2. Here Brent speaks candidly, about his aspirations and of the deep faith that gives him strength and hope. He gives readers clear guidance and helpful tips in the struggle to find balance in times of economic, political and climactic instability. Direct and to the point, Brent shoots from the hip and outlines a new direction for humanity, based on Bono and the music of U2.

You are cordially invited to join the celebration of iconoclast, celebrity and activism in the global age of doom and gloom end times religious hysteria! This is not your everyday SENSATIONALIST TELL-ALL memoir of the latest TELEVANGELIST caught in a HOT SEX, DRUGS & ROCK'N ROLL SCANDAL. Cheers.

• Language: English
• Publisher: eBookIt.com
• Release date: Apr 26, 2016
• ISBN: 9781456620585

Book preview

education.

FONTS

This e-book was designed with the Helvetica font set. Although display will work with all fonts, you may wish to adjust your reading device. If Helvetica is unavailable, Arial or a similar sans serif font is recommended. Font availability will depend on your e-reader.

ABSTRACT

You know who Bono is. Everyone knows who Bono is! Love him or hate him, he is the lead singer of U2, an international diplomat, a peacemaker, and the champion of the movement to end the tragedy of extreme poverty. Did you know that he is now the most recognized player on the world stage today? With the U2 stage setup, he literally has the loudest voice on the planet. And thanks be to him, millions of lives have been saved as a result of his work as an advocate for the fair distribution of food and medicine to people in crisis. What a super star! He’s an inspiration for all people everywhere.

Few have been inspired by Bono’s star like Brent Barton, humble photocopier salesman from Vancouver and world traveling U2opian social activist. He’s the guy who followed that star and set out to transform the music and activism of Bono into a controversial global spiritual movement – the latest and greatest of all in the long history of world religion – and then dedicated his life to finding lasting solutions to all of humanity's problems.

In the pages of this personal memoir, Brent opens up for the first time ever about the birth of the movement, taking the reader behind the rise of TEMPLE™, from the early days of downtown street preaching, to the opening of the first wave of TEMPLE™ mega-plex multi-centers and all the way through to the international advancement of the extravagantly ambitious U2opian agenda. Here Brent shares his thoughts on Africa, poverty, charity, religion, tolerance, respect, haters, extremists, reality, enlightenment, and the awesomeness of everything associated with the music of the rock’n roll band U2. Here, for the first time ever, Brent speaks candidly, about his aspirations and of the deep faith that gives him strength and hope. He gives readers clear guidance and helpful tips in the struggle to find balance in times of economic, political and climactic instability. Direct and to the point, Brent shoots from the hip and outlines a new direction for humanity, based on Bono and the music of U2.

You are cordially invited to join the celebration of iconoclast, celebrity and activism in the global age of doom and gloom end times religious hysteria! This is not your everyday SENSATIONALIST TELL-ALL memoir of the latest TELEVANGELIST caught in a HOT SEX, DRUGS & ROCK'N ROLL SCANDAL. Cheers.

DISCLOSURE

Dare to believe, most of what follows is ALL true. In consideration of the feelings of some friends and acquaintances, I have changed several names and identifying characteristics. Some sequences and details have been altered for literary coherence. But at the heart of it all is the absolute truth as I’ve come to know it.

INTRO

Hello there. I have some very important information that I think you should know about and I know (I know) we’re both real pressed for time.

Please.

One moment?

Thanks!

I’m reaching out to you right now because of some matters that concern you, your community, your nation, and your planet. If you’re someone who has an interest in how you can personally play a part in altering the course of this, our world, I have a message of good news for you!

This was how I sometimes introduced myself during MESSAGE™, the great welcoming campaign. MESSAGE™ was a huge success.

Many are put off by a direct approach like this. You might be one of those people. I’m one of those people. And, in defense of people like us, I would just like to add that this is a perfectly reasonable response to the state of things. These cold calls, and the soap box sidewalk street revival preaching and such, they get up so close and in your face, they invade your space. These calls, the loud demands for your attention, can be so annoying. For sure. And it’s nonstop all the time. Tell me about it. I know. No one hears anything when we’re all shouting at the same time.

But our pitch was brief.

And we always got right to the point.

We weren’t calling to waste anyone’s time.

If I’ve got you cornered, so to speak, and have your full attention, I’ll begin the signal scan. I’m looking for any of the signs that can be used to determine whether or not you are interested in more information. Verbal indicators mainly, there are multiple factors at play. Body language, biorhythmic feedback and such. Calculations are made, based on all of your reactions throughout our interaction thus far, to conclude whether or not you are interested in such talk of dreams and ideas of what may come or be. If I don’t receive a positive feedback signal I come to a full stop. I step back. Ease off. One must be sensitive to whether or not a person is receptive to an introduction. No interest? I do apologize. Sincerely. For any interruption and subsequent distress that I may have caused. It’s all cool, no worries. Another time perhaps. Have a great day. Our strongest intentions were always from the heart, filled with the sincerest desire and feelings of goodness.

If I had my satchel with me I would invite you to accept the gift of an informative brochure.

And then I’d leave you be.

Checkout our website, I’ll add, before a door closes between us.

Whenever there is an indication of interest I quickly follow with a passage from one of the Songs. Often I just say it, but if I am feeling particularly moved by the spirit I will sing it. An act of expression like this usually gets some attention when inserted into regular conversation.

The results, when one succeeds in making contact with that soul, that heart, that mind, changes the lives of whole communities. That is the power of the message.

What exactly are you selling? confused local citizens would ask.

Nothing you can’t leave behind, I replied.

I’ve talked to all sorts of people, from all walks of life, about how this is a message of more than just words, spoken or sung. I’ve preached – sue me, I’m a preacher, preaching is what I’ve been called to do – about how this is a message that will ring through your ears, pound in your chest, and send a firestorm of electrical current charging through your brain. It kick starts your heart. It gets this heartbeat pumping thumping alright.

Solid.

Steady now.

Go!

This is a message that penetrates, both the heart and the mind. It’s one that flows in, with a breath. It spreads warmth, from the sole of the foot to the crown of the head, circulating through your body and consciousness, entering you from the very ground of the Earth, and then ascends you, through you, to the stars above and around and beyond. It’s a message that encompasses your entire being and all things that surround you. From the sky, down, from the ground, up, this is a message made with an exclamation point!

Let’s stand up and, as the chorus kicks in, raise our arms in the air and shout woo-hoo as loud as we can.

WOO-HOO!

[The guitar notes ring out, the bass and the drums support us as we climb higher.]

Have you heard the music?

Have you let the sound in?

In the event that you have yet to have an opportunity to accept the music, into your heart, I am thrilled to inform you that it is here for you, a gift. It offers you (yes, you!) the chance to be a part of the solution. We’re talking about solutions here. Workable, sustainable, solutions. We’re talking about real solutions, to so many of our world’s greatest problems. What we’re talking about here is an opportunity. Here’s the offer: an unlimited access pass for solving the riddle of the human condition.

Does that sound like something that interests you?

I am so sorry if I interrupted you while you were eating.

Pardon me for cutting in on whatever it was that you were watching.

Please, friend, join me.

And together we can share a moment.

[pause]

When I heard the calling, and devoted my life to promoting the message of hope, peace, love, respect, justice, reason and logic that the melody has directed me on, I had no idea where this strange journey would lead. It’s taken me to amazing places! Physically, spiritually. Holy cow. Wow. I have been around a block or two. I’ve been out there, walking. I’ve walked through the streets and back alleyways, of cities all around the world. I’ve been up to the rooftops. I’ve flown up and across the skies. I’ve stood in the lines of life, I’ve stood in lots of lines. I’ve waded through the crowds and into the stadiums, filled with a hundred thousand plus, all fans, all cheering. I’ve marched with a megaphone, broadcasting the words to all. I’ve been to the disaster zones, with the workers serving in the clean up of major environmental catastrophes [LEGAL NOTE: Brent Barton has never assisted in the cleanup of a major environmental catastrophe]. I’ve been to the refugee camps in Africa and been a witness to the tears of a mother in need, turned away because there was no food or medicine left for the listless child she held in her arms [LEGAL NOTE: Brent Barton has never traveled to Africa nor served at a refugee camp]. I have visited far off strange lands. I’ve been to a troubled spot or two of bother. I’ve lived it up high class, and I’ve lived it up way down in low. Rock bottom, I’ve done it. From the pulpit, to a prison cell, I’ve been a servant, serving justice, serving time.

I tell you, when I’m done here there will be no more secrets for me to tell.

And the truth. It all comes out here.

I’ve been beaten up and kissed better again, there’s been a time or two. Like all contenders, all fighters, all lovers. I have my scars to reveal. I like to think that I’ve now had a broad experience of this here life and this here world before us. It’s been a full exposure experience for me, that’s for damn sure, in all ways and every ways. It’s been a ride. This qualifies. I’m just so glad to be here today. Alive. And free. I don’t know how I would have gotten through any of it if it weren’t for the gift of song.

A song!

Turn it up, please.

Ah!

That’s better.

Searchers, all of us, how blessed we are to be in such good company. Humans, all of us, we’re not alone on this strange planet we find ourselves on. Isn’t that uplifting! In the face of such a blindingly weird and mysterious universe, humanity has developed a longstanding tradition of believing in unbelievable things. I’m real proud to now be a part of that tradition. Clouds part and some hear voices calling from the sky. This is how it goes. Multi-headed beasts, apocalyptic visions: we are a people prone to believe in the wildest of miracles and the strangest of all wonders. Our capacity as a species to believe the unbelievable has no bounds! It’s one of our commonly exploited strengths, as a collective people. Throughout all my trials I continually requested the court to refer to this greater context. The bigger picture. Of all the spiritual claims that have been made and accepted throughout the course of human civilization, our belief in Bono isn’t nearly as farfetched or improbable as some of the more creative theologies that have gained traction over the course of our existence as a species.

At least our ministry had the hard evidence.

Records, released. We had the provable fact of U2 backing up our claims. Love and compassion make the world a better place, no strings attached. Faith, supported by fact. Whole libraries of books have been published documenting the grandness of U2. And all the data clearly shows that improving the welfare of the world’s poorest is a win-win benefit for all. Look at the data to track the dramatic rise in global improvements since Bono’s work on Earth began. It was our claims beyond all of these simple expressions of statistical fact that really set the sparks flying.

In a world that had become tinder dry, we were the powder keg and Bono was our match. Our movement, as spirited and controversial as it went on to be, exploded and went kaboom. Supernova style. We were a wildfire and we scorched the spiritual landscape, giving birth to the spring of new discussion. And what a fire we were! We were wham bam. Things got way, way out of control.

Perhaps we took it all too far. I don’t know. Final judgement on such matters doesn’t come from me. Lines were crossed, that’s for sure. I stand here now, humbled before my own mistakes, and I confess to the part my actions may have played in this ridiculous religious holy war that, now, continues. We can’t seem to stamp it out. No matter how hard we seem to try, still, it smolders and flares up all around us.

For over twenty-five years I have proclaimed the Good News message of U2. As a disciple and an early pioneer in U2opian thought, I helped found the First Temple of Bono (later TEMPLE™) and I have dedicated my life to the celebration and praise of the music, lyrics, and deeds of the band and its members. From the early days of preaching on the street, with just me and my guitar, to the opening of the URBAN TEMPLE™ and TEMPLE SUBURB™ multiplexes, to the greater global ministry expansion, I have made it my goal in life my – mission, my purpose – to magnify all that is great about this music and this thing some have referred to as a mysterious spirit.

And there is so much that is great and good! Of the billions of U2 fans in this world, I am just but one small voice in the crowd, singing. I sing and I praise with great joy and enthusiasm.

You will have to excuse me. I can be loud and boisterous at times. I am the guy at the dinner party who uncomfortably brings up the subject of religion. I am the guy who stands up and shouts woo-hoo, even at those moments when it may be inappropriate to do so. Cheers. I am the guy that will drop an F-bomb in the midst of a prim and proper polite conversation. Fuck yeah! Out of nowhere. Boom, right-atch-ya, I preach with a saucy tongue. I like to add me some spice. And uh-huh you better believe I use exclamation points! Because I’ve got me a point to make. Full stop, period.

I say what I have to say with plenty of passion, that’s just my style. That’s how I rock’n roll-it, you know what I’m saying?

I could say that I’m the guy who makes no apologies, but I’m being honest here, now, and I find that these days I’m apologizing all the time.

I am truly and indeed sorry.

I am sorry.

I’m sorry I raised my voice.

I raised it up, alright.

I’m sorry if I screamed and yelled.

I know it’s rude, to some. But I can’t help myself. I’m just excited about being alive in the world today. It’s not my intention to offend. I’ve been told that I am a very poor judge when it comes to determining what is or is not appropriate to say or do. I’ve always wanted to be the good guy here. That’s all I’ve ever wanted to be. If all that is good were to ever form an alliance, I want to be an enthusiastic member. I want to be a part of that team. Helping out, for good, for others, not just myself, spreading goodness to all and to everybody. I’m not a bad guy.

Now I know that all of this talk, over justice, and freedom, and religion, all this yadda yadda bleep bleep can be a little bit unsettling for some. It can get uncomfortable. And that’s okay. It’s become common for us to see life as an oppositional exercise. We see all of these hard lines all over the place. Lines that separate us. Lines that define our horizons. In fact, there are no lines. None! No lines. There are no lines. That’s what we were telling people. We were telling people and we were asking them to be all grown-up about it. Get over this illusion that we’ve succumbed to. Theses line appear as obstacles. We must remember, as a people, that obstacles can be overcome.

Please.

This moment, here, now, needn’t be an awkward moment.

None of this needs to be.

This moment, let’s follow it.

Let’s check it out.

Hear it. That beat, beat, beat of a song beat, thumping.

U2opian Ministries. TEMPLE™. URBAN TEMPLE™. TEMPLE SUBURB™. ELEVATION: RETREAT™. CENTER CENTRE™. Our faith developed many branches. We were something blooming, a garden for sure. As a religion, as a global phenomenon, we invigorated new meaning to the word massive. We spread our ideas so far and so wide. We touched a deep nerve, no one can deny it. I suppose that the true impact of our ministry is actually beyond calculation. We left a meaningful impression on things. We got a conversation started. And that’s something worth noting. We got people engaged. We stirred up some passion, uh huh, alright. And that’s very important to have in life. We opened up a thought process. We opened up channels for communication. The fire of the U2opian movement swept around the world and into the hearts and into the minds of all people everywhere.

I’ve been told that the joy of our celebrations has brought a little pain, to others. It saddens me to think that my life’s work has caused any discomfort or unease to anyone.

Our beliefs, our convictions, and our faith in their certainty, were too much (too much, too much) for some to bear.

And for any troubles that our freedom and our expression may have caused, I am sorry.

Oh, I enraged a few. From the evangelical right through the ranks of all the jihadists and all the so-called whitey-tighty-righty cultural warriors. From the guerrilla anarchist street punk and up, along each rung of the corporate ladder, to the top peak of the global political elite. I’ve pissed off the leaders of fan clubs, activist groups, trade unions, international charities and development organizations, and the legislative and judicial branches of governments on each continent. Not to mention rock stars. I’ve pissed off a rock star or two in my day.

I meant no offense and I do apologize.

I certainly meant no offense to Jesus.

I by no means meant any offense to Mohammed (Peace be Upon Him).

Please understand that I have a great deal of respect and admiration for the wonderful people, culture and industry of China.

To the band: I am sorry if I misinterpreted any of the lyrics or used your music out of a context that you intended. I acknowledge, celebrate and salute the rights you hold over your magnificent creative and intellectual properties!

To Bono and his family, I am sorry for intruding upon your privacy. I crossed that line and I shouldn’t have. Please forgive my indiscretions.

This crazy journey of mine subjected my own family to trials and tribulations. I am so grateful for their love and patience. I have made things terribly difficult for my loved ones. Offstage and on, the wild scandals and globe trotting antics were poor repayment for the gifts given to me. To write of each blessing I’ve received would take several books. Thanks be to the blessings of a broad definition of family: aunts, uncles, cousins once, cousins twice, cousins three times removed. Thanks be to the blessings of friends and friends of friends. There is a community to thank. Thanks be to all in my life who have shown me that the differences between people should not be just tolerated or accepted, but celebrated. It’s the common ground, the one shared by all of humanity, that is the real ground. This is our ground.

This is our ground.

We share it, together.

Although there may be times when we may feel that we walk alone, I tell you brothers, sisters, sons and daughters: we’re all walking through this world together. The universal story is our story. To all the people who hold convictions close to their heart that are different from mine, I mean you no disrespect. I value you and your beliefs! Peace, health and prosperity to you all. I am sorry. And I will be sorrier still I if I fail to communicate this message to you effectively now in this collection of my thoughts and stories. Communicating the idea of love to you is what I want most in life, and knowing that it has brought anger or hate into your heart, in any way, troubles me deeply.

I like to think that I have had my own taste of perspective now.

Time away from the world can give that to you.

It can bring a better sense of balance.

After the hoopla, and the brouhaha, many have asked me to write this all down.

People deserve an explanation, they say.

It’s true and I agree.

So I’m going to be completely honest here.

I’m going to wash myself and come clean.

It’s time to set the record straight about where I’m from, exactly, and how the music found me. That part is pretty tame. Nothing too shocking or controversial there. The gossip, the conspiracy, the accusations and lies can end because here it all is, laid down: the essence of U2opian philosophy. Here it is: the purpose and intention of TEMPLE™.

Here it is!

Words, transcribed.

Here’s how a great TEMPLE™ grew so big from something so simple – an idea –that started off so small. People have been wondering, they’ve been curious. They’ve wanted to know how our message traveled the globe, capturing the hearts (and minds) of all the masses, and how we picked away at the pus encrusted scab of intercultural holy war. Holy war. Good god, what a joke that is. But here it all is. Here it all is. In these pages I will share all I believe to be true about U2 and Bono. And I’ll share what I really think of all the Bono Haters out there. I’ll remember the tragedy of URBAN TEMPLE™ Eastside. And the tragedy that continues each and every day, when the children of that distant village, the innocent babies, suffer and die, in agony, all too real and true. They die for lack of food, clean water and medicine. I’ll remember them. I’ll remember their pain. I’ll ask lots of questions, about myself and the world around me. In these pages I will lay it all down. I will reveal all the detail that I can recall of my spirit vision while out lost, wandering, in the dry and inhospitable desert. For the first time ever I will describe the vision’s final verse. And I’ll briefly explain what happened in France. I’ll tell you what possessed me and why. I will rant and rave on many subjects. We’ll go on a journey in these pages. It is my hope that this collection of words, this manifesto of a long awaited tell all, can answer all the questions you may have about me, Bono, U2, the universe and life in general.

Let this be a testament, for people around the world and throughout the ages interested in the mystical experience, to study and learn from. I don’t think that humanity should, but in the event that we adopt yet another book as a sacred religious text, let these words be it or serve as an inspiration to it’s writing.

Three chords and the truth!

This is the story of the one true Rock n’ Roll religion.

U2OPIA! [EXECUTIVE SUMMARY]

The wonder called U2opia is not a place.

It’s an idea.

And it’s not a complicated idea.

In fact, it’s really quite simple.

Admittedly, it’s ambitious. It’s outrageously ambitious, and here’s a place, thankfully, at long last, where no apologies are required. Dreams, when dreamed big and proper, should be ambitious. You needn’t apologize for dreaming big dreams.

I won’t hold it against you (I hold nothing against you) if you wish to dismiss this as one of those ideas that sound just a little teensy bit cra-cra-cra-crazy. But go ahead. Feel free. We’re talking about the good kind of cra-cra-cra-crazy here.

U2opia is an idea of a world where people, whoever – just people, really – from all walks of life, come together, united, in a positive common cause. Peace, love, hope, charity, equality, justice, whatever, this idea manifests itself whenever there’s a union, of the multi into the one. Groups of disparate people, individuals, coming together, getting along, mingling. Imagine a world where all our differences do not divide us, but distinguish us. A world of individuals, coming together to work towards something we all have in common. Something that is positive! Together. This is the common ground viewpoint. It’s nothing new. It’s an eternal idea. What is maybe new is the presentation. What maybe new is the possibility. U2opia offers a brand new way to look at the world. Great sights are to behold! It’s all truly fantastic and amazing and scary yet fun.

But why?

That’s usually one of the first questions asked.

Why?

Why U2?

Seriously here.

What’s so great about this rock band from Ireland?

It’s a valid question, thanks for raising it. This is a question I’ve asked myself, many times over. Why does U2 stand out? Why are they so important? What’s the big deal? Among all the other rock stars, among all the other celebrities, of all the historical world figures and venerable heroes, throughout all the ages of known human history, why are U2 so special? What’s so great about this band and this guy who calls himself Bono?