Shared Secret

By Ed Bemand

What are you supposed to do when the person you love won’t fuck you?
Alex and Maria are married and still in love. He’s got a decent job and they live in a nice house, but they haven’t had sex since her miscarriage. Alex is sympathetic and doesn’t want to pressure her, but it leaves him needing an outlet.
Maria’s decision to join a book club will give her a reason to get out of the house and meet new people, and him an opportunity to indulge his burgeoning passion for bondage porn in private. How long will it take for Alex to realise what his wife is getting up to on Tuesday nights and who the mysterious new woman in his life is?
This book contains graphic sexual content and is for adults only.
Persistent scribbler of strange and obscene things, Ed Bemand was born and raised in Guildford, UK. His first novel Beheld was published in 2006. He is also the author of other works including Sinful Submissions, Succumbing, People Eating and Hannah's Story. He currently lives in Cardiff. His hobbies include loud noises, simulated violence, aimless wandering and morbid introspection.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Ed Bemand
• Release date: Mar 9, 2016
• ISBN: 9781311659187

Ed Bemand

Persistent scribbler of strange and obscene things, Ed Bemand was born and raised in Guildford, England. At school he wasn’t voted anything. Absence of a better plan and a strong desire to be somewhere else led him at eighteen to commence three years of loose association with a university, to mutual dissatisfaction. The relationship came to a bitter close and he was subjected to stern lectures about the value of hard work and the necessity of earning an honest living. His lack of useful skills or qualifications left him unable to, so he started working in sales. During the next few years he sold such diversities as IT equipment, insurance, double-glazing and ID cards. His first novel Beheld was published in 2006 but it failed to make him either successful or wealthy, so wage-slavery continued. After a decade of gainful employment he was only too happy to cast aside the shackles of respectability in favour of writing full-time. For the last few years he has lived in Cardiff, Wales with a girl and a dog. His hobbies include loud noises, simulated violence, aimless wandering and morbid introspection.

Book preview

Shared Secret

Or

When Alex and Maria wanted the same thing but couldn’t give it to each other

By

Ed Bemand

Smashwords Edition

Copyright Ed Bemand 2015.

All rights reserved.

www.EdBemand.co.uk

Cover design by Adrijus from RockingBookCovers.com

This story should be considered a work of fiction. The names, characters and incidents portrayed in it are the work of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons living or dead is entirely coincidental.

Warning, this story contains graphic sexual content and is intended for adults only. All characters depicted in sexual acts are eighteen years of age or older.

Table of Contents

Prologue

Chapter 1 - What Alex wanted

Chapter 2 - How Alex got it

Chapter 3 - Alex’s guilty secret

Chapter 4 - Alex’s mind boggles

Chapter 5 - How Alex and Maria met

Chapter 6 - What Maria liked

Chapter 7 - How Maria got it

Chapter 8 - Camilla enjoys herself

Chapter 9 - Camilla knows best

Chapter 10 - How they both cheated

Chapter 11 - Alex finds out

Epilogue

About the author

Prologue

This is a story about love. It’s also about passion, which isn’t the same thing but has a little in common with it.

Mostly it’s about secrets, the big, dark ones that can consume a soul and the little ones we keep because our life is simpler that way. This is a story about two people who think they know each other, and the secrets they keep from each other. People may think that they know each other well, but still see the same things very differently.

Really, it’s a story about lies. Without lies, there could be no secrets because all lies are secrets in their not-telling. Without secrets there could be no mystery, no surprise, no wonderment, and the world would be a poorer place.

People with manners understand that lies are a necessary part of civilised life. Honesty is presented as a virtue, but we’ve all had the unpleasant experience of meeting individuals that are too truthful, justifying rudeness by not being false, boasting that people either love them or hate them. Missing the point that generally, people just dislike them but are too polite to tell them the truth.

Few people will publicly recommend deceit. To be a good liar, you must appear honest. Conceal the reaction in your eyes when you realise you know something that the person talking to you doesn’t. Don’t squander the moment rashly, destroying precious illusion. Every moment that passes while you don’t creates an unknowing, giving falsehood the weight of truth.

This is also a story about sex. Some of it mundane, some rather kinky. Those nervous and childish should leave, but the strong, the brave and the wondrous have nothing to fear.

Chapter 1 - What Alex wanted

Alex and Maria had been married for about two years. Alex claimed that he preferred just being with the woman that he loved and that his wild days of impulsively chasing skirts were behind him. He meant it too, he really did prefer being with her. Not that he’d ever been very successful when he had been trying to chase women. He’d always felt a bit awkward about sex. Most of his early experiences were heavily reliant on alcohol to overcome his embarrassment. He didn’t have sex sober until he was in his twenties.

Though Alex and Maria had never really talked about sex, it didn’t stop them from having it. When they wanted to do it things just seemed to happen organically. He didn’t have to tell her to do things. Communication while they were fucking was through movement and eye contact. The noises that she made during climax were wordless and he didn’t tend to make much noise anyway.

They had found a variety of sexual positions that worked well for each of them in different ways. Missionary was the simplest for him to be able to cum in, which could be a good or a bad thing, depending on the moment. Doggy was good for pounding her but some of the angles he thrust at could be painful for her if he wasn’t careful. Careful defeated the point of pounding. From time to time she liked to be on top of him. Looking up at the ceiling wasn’t his favoured position but she liked it because it gave her the ability to guide the rhythm. She could grind her pussy against him, getting the stimulus she needed. It was the only time that he ever felt like she could be too rough, when the bones of her pelvis dug into his flesh and made him wince. The rest of the time her touch was more tentative and cautious.

Once she gave him a pair of handcuffs as a joke present. He couldn’t figure out which one of them she was suggesting should end up wearing them and his inability to tell and unwillingness to ask meant that they lay unused in a drawer.

When Maria became pregnant, she was very happy. They were married and in love, they owned a house, of course they wanted to have a child together. Alex’s job was dull but well enough paid that it made sense to both of them that she should stay home to focus on looking after their soon-to-appear child.

Her miscarriage was a difficult setback.

Even if Alex hadn’t exactly wanted kids, he hadn’t not wanted them and was happy enough to go along with it. Maria seemed so happy when she found out she was pregnant. He missed that. Things never really seemed to happen between them after that. In theory at least, they both wanted to keep trying to have a child together but in practise they hadn’t had sex in months.

How long was sympathy supposed to continue for? At what point did it go beyond feeling legitimately sad and become something that she should be shaken out of? Free from immediate financial pressures, Alex didn’t mind that Maria didn’t want to go back to work, but did that mean that she would just spend the rest of her life sat at home? He got used to getting in from work and finding her sprawled on the sofa, eyes glazed over from staring at the TV, usually not even properly dressed.

The room that they had been calling the nursery had been relabelled as the office and now it had a desk in it where it was supposed to have a cot. Alex was just glad he hadn’t let her talk him into painting the walls in some hideous colour. At least this way he had a little privacy for what was increasingly his only sexual outlet.

When his mother wanted to embarrass Alex in front of people, she would tell them that he had held onto his cock with one little fist for most of his waking hours for the first couple of years of his life. It wasn’t something he could remember so he didn’t think it fair that he could be held accountable for his conduct at that time in his life. Regardless, as the years went on he continued to spend a fair amount of time gripping his own cock.

Porn had been a presence in his masturbatory life for as long as he could remember. In his early teens he scavenged a small collection of photos of naked women. At that stage he had little genuine pornography and relied on lucky finds in magazines and catalogues. Later he was able to scour the vast array of online pornography and see all manner of startling things that might never have occurred to him otherwise.

Since being with Maria he had certainly wanked less than at his adolescent peak, but it was unlikely that