To Kill a Bunyip

By A R Dent

Null, a remote fishing village where boredom reins until two dogs decide to solve the problem of the Bunyip. Add a transvestite politician, a high school drop-out, mysterious deaths, and the ancestors of the village's founder - Terrence Null - facing a stark reality check, and you have a parody of life, 'To Kill a Bunyip'. This is an engaging tale that probes the emotions and motives of many characters culminating in a thrilling climax at the Seafood Festival.
This is book three of Hollow Log stories. Book one is The Justice of Null. Book two is Ocker Oscar. Terrence Null and his descendants in three stories in different genres; Satire written in Myth Fantasy and Alternative history. One wonders if Terrence Null did exist.

• Language: English
• Publisher: A R Dent
• Release date: Apr 27, 2015
• ISBN: 9781310602900

A R Dent

A.R. Dent was born in 1945 in Sydney and lived at a beach side suburb. After a turbulent/quiet contrasting early life A.R. Dent then spent time travelling before settling down for a business and professional life. 'Been there - done that' about sums up his life. A Professional Artist and now also including his love of writing and poetry into his life. In writing To Kill a Bunyip I had a plan. Write the book more stupid than Ocker Oscar (that was a challenge). I now have another plan; write each book more stupid than the last book. The single goal of A R Dent is to create original stories that entertain. I am not writing books. I am not an author. I am now a storyteller. I have a present 'work-in-progress' to follow after To Kill a Bunyip and experimenting with other stories to find my true 'author's voice' which is there but I need to fine tune it specifically for storytelling. Short stories and Novellas are my aim to entertain through the written word. All books/stories are related to me...... Ocker Oscar and To Kill a Bunyip were written from my experiences in my life. All stories will have a theme or plot that is connected somehow to my life. My intent is to write, using satire, in a way that people see history as a continuum that changes but remains constant. Fiction, facts, and lies. My next book is - The People of Null (title may change). Details of the progress are posted on A R Dent Facebook page. The Justice of Null is the core to Hollow Log Stories. My writing style has changed somewhat but satire remains as the main theme within my writings. Ocker Oscar is connected to To Kill a Bunyip though the Dawson family and the twins. These two books are present day. The Justice of Null focuses on 1857 when Terrence Null was told he was to be a Justice of the Peace. The Justice of Null is the book that Hollow Log Stories draws its characters and stories. The People of Null is in concept stage and being researched and developed. The People of Null is back in real time in the village of Null when a psychiatrist goes to Null for retirement. *Waiting for god* in a retirement village and being told to fit into society. This concept has me laughing as I write the precis and develop a story around this theme.

Book preview

To Kill a Bunyip

A R Dent

For everybody there is a Hollow Log to hide in from the world

Where a safe haven exists to create fantasy

To be whoever you dream to be

To Kill A Bunyip

Copyright 2015 A R Dent

ISBN 9781310602900

Smashwords Edition

This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to any person or dog is strictly coincidental except for the dogs I loved the most.

To Sarki and Charlie I am indebted to your contribution to my life and this book.

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To Kill a Bunyip

All copies of the book The Tragedy of Terrence Null were burnt. Terrence Null was the son of an English mariner who later became a Naval Lieutenant in His Majesty’s Royal Navy. Terrence Null served on a naval merchant ship supplying goods to new settlements along the eastern coast of Australia. Terrence Null was assigned to transporting new settlers to faraway places establishing new towns to supply food to the growing Brisbane. On one of these trips, Terrence Null saw an inlet suitable where he could retire. Terrence Null, on his retirement, was granted 500 acres to establish a fishing industry. Terrence Null’s life was a tragedy waiting to happen. His first wife and eight children remained in England living off his pension. In Australia, Terrence Null had twenty-five illegitimate children and had several concubines who attended to his continual demands. Terrence Null set up his land grant based on English feudalism. A system that continued until he died. On his death, his twenty-five children gradually took over his various enterprises and changed their name by deed poll. Each child then fought for the ultimate right for claiming heritage rights of the comedy of small errors of Terrence Null. A later book was written, The Comedy of Small Errors of Terrence Null and all copies were also burnt. (Nobody knows I have a copy of the book. The only one in existence).

If the children admitted failure of any venture they simply said, ‘Another product of Null’. All records of his time as a Naval Officer were destroyed to protect the good name of His Majesty’s Royal Navy. Null, a town where nothing ever happens, is evidence of Terrence Null’s comedy of small errors. Rome, Athens, and Pompeii were the same. Sanitised hysterical history has their records as people being born into a sanitised way of living. Terrence Null liked to cross dress and had a weakness for having private parties where he would stand naked and guests would toast his health and then throw their empty wine glasses into a fireplace. Denial of their heritage became a tradition for the descendants of Terrence Null. The major failing of Terrence Null was in regard the education of his children. Education needed tutors. Tutors had to be paid. Terrence Null spent all his money on snuff, opium, and rum. The town of Null prospered in spite of Terrence Null. After his estate was established with a mansion on a high hill, with concubines and eight of his children (the young ones), a day happened when a lone sailor cruised into Null Inlet. The sailor was seeking refuge in a quiet creek from an approaching tropical cyclone. The man was a de-frocked priest and lived on whatever means he could as a trader. Terrence Null saw this opportunity for his children to be educated. An agreement was reached for the exchange of food and shelter to the ex-priest and his children commenced a formal education. I’ve deleted certain things in this book because of solicitor’s advice. A longer version of this story I’ve written is an attachment to my Last Will and Testament. Hence, this story has certain details missing of Null due to the continuum of The Comedy of Small Errors of Terrence Null. The story is a mish mash of words due to the lack of education of the author. I start the story with a record of events of my second cousin’s husband’s third wife’s eldest son Gary so I can’t do anything but give him some sort of credibility for doing something of value in his life. (So many people with a history of doing nothing for society --- ah well, I could’ve done better and listened at school myself.)

~~~~~~~

A short tribute to Gazza before I get into the juicy bits of the town.

Null, a town with the nicest pansies in flowerbeds alongside of a concrete driveway. Null, often described as ‘Where the hell is that?’ before federal politics changed the way people perceived the town and its inhabitants.

In a home, approximately a driver and nine iron distance from the town, described locally as living on Rich Bitch Hill, a phone rang.

‘Gary, what the hell are you doing? This newspaper has the debate as their main story. What good is it running off getting support from a multitude of people who know nothing? You are a scum, a small-minded politician who was expelled from schools of the highest order that could have educated you to the highest knowing. You have despised what my family did for you. When your parents were killed in the accident, my family took you in: fed and clothed you. Educated you and you do this to us. What good is a debate going to do? When I was the Member for Crow, you did nothing but ridicule me. Me, the person who took you fishing and taught you bush skills and what you do now is treason to my good family. If it wasn’t for the fact you deposed me at the last election I would ram. . . . I would go and. . . . oh, I’d cut you off completely but now as Mayor I have to smile in public when we are out and about. I despise you Gary and don’t ever set a foot on any of my families’ property again. I can’t say how much I despise you,’ Arthur Freeman said.

‘Are you finished raving on? Is your family crest still hanging straight? Arthur, your mother is the cousin of my mother. We are related Arthur, though I stopped being your friend after you denied the child abuse stuff in the family. Anyway, what the heck are you going on about? Newspaper, what newspaper?’ Gary Benedict Smith said.

‘The newspaper has a headline which reads, Cocks in Frocks versus a Cock in a Frock, and I’m not amused by it.’

‘Sounds about right. I wonder who thought that one up but considering the debate is me against your priests, I hardly think you should see a problem with a bit of free publicity. A public debate about religion has been called for and that’s what I’ll be debating. Don’t call me Arthur and I promise I won’t be calling you. See you at the debate and while you’re at it. Please tell your mum the pie she cooked for me was delicious.’

Gary Smith sat down and planned his next Saturday night gig at the local theatre restaurant as he had done for years before becoming an elected member of Federal Parliament.

One week later.

‘Gary Smith thanks for coming in to our ABC regional newsroom. We appreciate, under the circumstances of what happened tonight, it must be traumatic to you and I’ll be as brief as possible for you to get home tonight and rest for your engagements tomorrow.’

‘Thanks Andrea.’

‘Gary Smith, one year after the landslide victory of the LGBT Party winning an unprecedented 145 of the 150 seats in Federal Parliament it is now a different scene in democracy in Australia. Do you think tonight was prompted, in the town of New Brunswick, as a result of continuing unrest by the now defunct Oligarch Party, were you targeted by descendents of Terrence Null who live in this area?’

‘Andrea, I am descended from Terrence Null. Many families in this area are. In Null where I live, the after-shock of the election twelve months ago has not had any effect on the town. Null is one of those places where nothing happens. Tonight we saw in New Brunswick, the core of democracy being challenged by those who upheld democracy as their dogma. In effect, they were using democracy as their armoury for a demagogue government. Three people were to debate with me the subject of religion. One person turned up to represent their point of view. The audience threw tomatoes and rotten eggs and demonstrated violently. I have no idea why they did it. There is a belief in the town of Null, that it was democracy being challenged, not religion. The Two Party preferred voting system was overthrown when one of the two parties was obliterated and now the Communist Party is in disarray. The political process in Australia was a Left Wing party and a Right Wing party contest. That system is now being replaced by a movement to return, as close as possible, to the democracy of ancient Athens, the birth-place of democracy. The next elections will be interesting because the Oligarch party is gone, and replaced by a void in politics.

In response to your question, I was warned before by an anonymous message of a disruption based on a resurgence of the Oligarch Party. I can’t say anything more than that.

I don’t want to comment on the behaviour of our esteemed Mayor, Arthur Freeman. I understand your cameras captured his antics as he approached the lectern.’

‘Mr Gary Smith, thank you for your words and now this is Andrea Longbottom for ABC News crossing back to our Canberra studios where the Prime Minister is talking to a panel of guests.’

~~~~~

A quiet seaside town.

Coastal country urban villages abound throughout the world. Each village has its own personality. The local industry of each village is based on its connectivity to the waterways the village was formed on. What was once a group of fishermen’s huts transforms into a support network of industry supplying seafood to towns and cities. Null’s history was fishing and like many remote villages an influx of tourists later become an avalanche of retirees. Null was in this transition of mixed economic change with a network of minor industry supporting primary industry. The fishing fleet remained as the primary industry with each person, tourist or resident, benefitting from the varied trades people and professional people to sustain and maintain the infrastructure. The totality of life in Null was based around weather.

Schools, always the battleground between personalities of students and teachers, and at Null High School a teacher/student interview was underway. . . .

The silence was deliberate as Eloise Buchanan waited for an answer. Penelope Dawson shuffled in her seat.

‘I can’t answer that Miss,’ Penelope Dawson answered.

‘Penelope, I haven’t got all day and in fact I haven’t got all week. I will not be here after Friday and you are the last student I am completing a review for New Brunswick High School,’ Eloise Buchanan said.

Eloise Buchanan folded her arms and stared at Penelope.

‘New Brunswick High? I thought this was for my sports allowance for Noosa. What has New Brunswick High got to do with me?’

‘Penelope, you were a Grade A student at Maryborough before you and your brother came to Null High School. You and your brother had to wait, because it was a mid-term placement, and both of you were waiting for a student to leave New Brunswick High. Jack went straight in after a seat was found for him. A vacancy occurred because a student left to go to another school. In the mean time, your schoolwork dropped below your usual standard. This meant you stayed at Null High. The whole of the New Brunswick Shire has students wanting to get acceptance to New Brunswick High School. Now Penelope I will ask you again. Do you want to stay at school here in Null?’

‘I don’t know what you mean. I come to school I go home. Simple. Do I have to like the school or being at school to be accepted here?’

‘Ok. We are getting somewhere. Penelope,