Teenagers 101: What a Top Teacher Wishes You Knew About Helping Your Kid Succeed

By Rebecca Deurlein

As a parent, you want to see your teen succeed in school and in life—and
you do your best to help. But how do you know what will make a
difference? Maybe it’s time to listen to a teacher.

Day in and day out, teachers watch kids interact with peers, make
decisions, deal with difficulty, accept or deflect responsibility . . .
Teachers are our eyes and ears—and there’s a lot they wish
we knew.

In Teenagers 101, veteran high school teacher Rebecca Deurlein
examines how we can support our teens as they cope with the challenges
of the modern world. In an age of instant gratification, how do they
learn to work hard? How do they become self-reliant when Mom and Dad are
quick to step in? How do they make the transition from kids to adults?
Speaking as an educator and a parent herself, Deurlein offers practical
strategies for getting teens to:

Be self-motivated • Take responsibility for learning • Puzzle through
problems • Become their own advocate • Present themselves well • And more

Packed with engaging anecdotes and backed by years of experience, Teenagers
101 is a crash course on the skills teenagers everywhere need to
thrive in college and beyond.

• Language: English
• Publisher: AMACOM
• Release date: Nov 5, 2014
• ISBN: 9780814434666

Rebecca Deurlein

REBECCA DEURLEIN, ED.D. (Houston, TX) has taught in school systems around the country. She has a doctoral degree in educational leadership and has raised two children of her own.

Reviews for Teenagers 101

[writermala · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

I am a parent and former teacher. I thought I knew everything there was to know about teenagers. Well, reading "Teenagers 101" proved I was wrong. Dr. Rebecca Deurlein has written a comprehensive guide to dealing with teenagers. Her concrete examples and case studies show us exactly how we should handle different scenarios. Perhaps her comment that parenting is an art not an exact science sums it all up.

[samsattler · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Because I work closely with my youngest grandson on his daily homework assignments and on his test preparation, I am always on the lookout for books like Rebecca Deurlein’s Teenagers 101. In this case, it was the book’s more descriptive subtitle that grabbed my attention: “What a Top Teacher Wishes You Knew about Helping Your Kid Succeed.” My grandson has a variety of learning disabilities that frustrate his efforts, so keeping him properly motivated is a big part of helping him succeed with his school work.Teenagers 101, though, is not just aimed at parents of children who are struggling with their school work. Much of the book, in fact, is aimed at parents whose children are doing better than most of their peers, those kids who take Pre-AP and AP classes and cannot imagine a future for themselves that does not include at least four years of secondary education. Deurlein’s advice regarding motivating your particular student, however, applies equally well to students at both ends of the spectrum. And, if you in your role of parent or grandparent, need a little motivation to remain, or to become, active in helping your student succeed, Deurlein offers these two reminders of just how important that role is:•“How you respond to your children’s actions, and what consequences they face as a result of their behavior will determine, almost entirely, their future behavior.”•“Every kid does something well. Our job is to notice when that happens and use it as a tool of encouragement that will prod children to work harder next time.”Deurlein, however, is quick to point out where your role as mentor begins and where it ends. Too many parents make the mistake of “editing” student homework to the point that it becomes more the work of the parent than that of the student – and no one, including the student, is fooled. Consequently, the author devotes an entire chapter to “knowing when to back off” and letting your teen assume responsibility for his day-to-day education, a process that should be well in place by the time they start high school.Along the way, there are chapters on a diverse set of topics, such as: the advantages of allowing your children to take advanced classes; organizational skills; teaching children to “dress for success;” determining if your student is “college bound;” building self-esteem in children; and how to effectively work with your child’s teachers. Keep in mind that Teenagers 101 was written by an experienced high school teacher, someone who has probably seen it all by this stage in her career. She has a good idea of what works and what does not work. If you are looking for some motivational tips or for something to explain what your child might be going through, Teenagers 101 is a good place to start.

[susan.macura · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Told from the perspective of a veteran teacher and mother of teens, this book is a great resource for parents of children of all ages. As a future teacher and substitute teacher, I have encountered the issues she addresses in many classrooms. In this age of cell phones and the Internet, too many of our young people rely on these devices to do all of their work for them, including cheat on tests! This is done in a variety of ways, from taking a photo of the test to share with those taking it later, to looking up answers quickly while the teacher is focused elsewhere, to sending messages to each other during the exam sharing information. While this is a problem, what is even worse are those parents who feel they need to remain in constant contact with their child, even during class time! How is a child ever to grow up and be independent if they are tied to their parents in this fashion? Then there are those parents who feel the need to jump in and save their child when he or she does not do their work on time, fails a test or simply misbehaves in class. Too often parents jump to their child’s side without getting the other side of the story – the teacher’s! Instead of talking to the teacher and discovering that their perfect little child is not so perfect, they make an end run around the teacher and go to the principal, superintendent and school board so their child does not “suffer.” What does that teach them? It teaches them that they don’t have to do the work, that all they have to do is whine to mommy and daddy who will fix things for them and that they are the ones with the power in the classroom, thus they can do what they wish with no repercussions. This includes not doing any work or learning the material. I suppose for some parents this might be OK but I do hope they plan on supporting their beloved child for the rest of his or her life, because in my experience this is not how the real world works. My experience is that if you don’t do the work assigned to you on time, you no longer have a job. These are just some of the issues she addresses but others include how to motivate your child, how to encourage them to persevere with their work, how to get them to accept responsibility for their actions and how to build their self esteem in the best way, as well as whether or not your child should go to college or take AP classes. Her is a plan for how to best prepare your child for adulthood. I would recommend this book for parents of children of all ages because it is never to early to start some of these patterns of behavior.