Perfect Shadows
By E.P. ROSE
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About this ebook
“What are kings, when regiments are gone,
But perfect shadows in a sunshine day?”
Christopher Marlowe - Edward ll.
Perfect Shadows is a delightfully naughty, politico-royal, comic novella by E.P.Rose, author of Beyond the Valley of Sex and Shopping and The Conspiracy Kid. It is a story of cabbages and scratch-card kings, set inside a palace, from where it looks as though aging rock star Johnny "The Pope" Pope and his preposterous (or possibly brilliant) Lottery Party is about to win the imminent election, promising to abolish all taxes and all political parties, replacing them with a confederation of independents funded solely by lottery.
Only one man stands between Pope and his political ambitions – The King. But the King has problems of his own, because the Queen is pregnant and though she swears the baby’s his, His Majesty knows for a fact this simply can’t be true. In which case then, who can the father be? The valet? The poet? The cook?
And then "The Pope" announces that when he wins the election, he is going to force the King to abdicate and have him replaced by the winner of a Royal Scratch-Card Competition, the proceeds of which (25,000 cards @ £10,000 a pop) should fund the monarchy nicely for the next four years.
Which prompts the King to say: “Scratch Card King! How does he think he’s going to secure my abdication? He’d have to kill me first. Pope is no Cromwell. He’s a drug-addled moron with more money than sense and an eye to the main chance. Believe me, when push comes to shove, he’s going to find out that I’m more than a perfect shadow on a sunny day."
E.P. ROSE
E.P.ROSE lives in London with a dog called Frank and various daughters.
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