The One We Feed

By Kristina Meister

After the bizarre suicide of her sister, Lilith Pierce discovered that the world was full of dangers and villains she could not have imagined, and that the history of human civilization was far from complete. Now, gifted with tremendous powers she barely understands, Lilith is determined to stop whatever plots and schemes her immortal cousins, the Sangha, can hatch. When a simple reconnaissance mission ends in tragedy; however, Lilith’s entire focus changes. Attempting to save a child she's never met from a fate worse than death will require every ounce of Lilith’s strength, forge new and treacherous alliances, and possibly change the world forever. Suddenly all eyes are on her, and the destiny of the human race is on her shoulders.  A thrill ride with soul for a new generation of thinkers!

• Language: English
• Publisher: JournalStone
• Release date: Aug 16, 2013
• ISBN: 9781940161006

Kristina Meister

I'm a writer of Urban Fantasy/ science fiction, an Otaku, a cos-player, and an ambulathanataphobic (afraid of zombies). No big. I deal. The sword helps. I am a pop culture whore, a memeticist, and a total hard-core geek.

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Chapter 1

Déjà vu

I poked the package of powdered doughnuts and shook my head in disbelief. It was hard to imagine that not four months ago, I had considered these edible when they were actually more fitting as nuclear survival shelters for cockroaches.

You don’t seriously put these in your mouth? I asked the person on the other end of the telephone.

Wha’s wong wiff dem? he managed to say around a mouthful.

Besides the fact that they smell like Playdoh?

We were the length of the country apart but both sitting in our cars, watching. In the spirit of the occasion, I had purchased stakeout cuisine. I found that the stock at the local quickie mart was really quite varied and that absolutely none of it sounded appetizing in any way. Standing there, reading nutrition facts, I was almost glad I no longer required food to live.

"I’ve been less grossed out by people who drink blood. Matt, you’re going to give yourself a heart attack."

He swallowed laboriously, Another one? Oh, hell.

"You mean you’ve already had one? I sat back in my car and glanced out the window. Nothing had changed. Big shock. Were you on a stakeout at the time?"

No, I was in the bull pen. I could only assume that’s what the homicide detectives called their grouping of cubbies down at the precinct. It had a certain scrappiness that reminded me of him.

Happy you’re no longer under that kind of stress?

Stress? he joked. It was the food that gave me the heart attack, remember?

I rolled my eyes. Oh yeah, and the exhaustion and responsibility were completely manageable. For a moment, a pang of loss bit through the cold sarcasm. My sister’s death had been the moment when my carefully tailored life had finally unraveled. Having gotten to know Matt since and see how tired he had been, I was more than a little ashamed that he’d been the person to put me back on my feet, literally.

In a storm of crackling plastic, Unger opened something new to shove into his face. Anything new?

No! I sighed and slid lower in my seat. I mean, I know I’m supposed to be all-suffering now….

"Since your enlightenment, you mean. He chuckled, as if my evolution into an all-seeing immortal was half-assed. I felt like telling him it was an ongoing process, but it wasn’t like that would have made any difference. Matthew Unger thought of Zen as that karate shit."

I am so bored! Arthur keeps saying things will happen as they will, but why can’t they happen faster!

One sect of the Sangha down, only a few dozen remained. When I had signed up to eliminate immortal strongholds one at a time, no one had said anything about how long it would take. Sitting in this car for the umpteenth night in a row, tired even though it was impossible for me to be tired, I was beginning to think that somehow word had gotten out and they’d all gone to their crypts to hide.

Or maybe they’re waiting for you to file your taxes so they can schedule an audit. That sounded like something the Sangha would do when they weren’t throwing people in hermetically sealed, padded cells so that they could chew off their own limbs.

He’s right. Stakeouts take patience.

Yeah, well, since when has Arthur been wrong? I mumbled. What about you guys? How’s Sam?

Making money hand over fist. We underestimated the draw of a detective agency to his coffee shop.

Has he arranged a grouping of mystery and suspense novels at the back for all the wannabe sleuths who come knocking? I giggled.

Blah. There’s a book club that holds its meetings here once a month. They just finished a Chandler. Asked me to speak about police procedures.

I smirked. I imagine fact checking James Patterson was exactly the type of retirement you had in mind. I plucked the doughnuts off the dash and tossed them into the passenger seat in disgust. I’ve been sitting outside of a completely normal-looking building for almost three weeks! The dental hygienists are starting to talk. Pretty soon they’ll either call the cops or ask me if I need a cleaning.

What are you waiting for, someone to walk out holding a sign that says ‘Slayers please use side entrance.’ How do you know you’re even in the right place?

I glanced knowingly at myself in the mirror. It’s the gift of the Buddhas to always be internally insightful.

Whatever. I have a hard time with all this philosophical, thoughts-as-physical-things-doing-physical-damage BS.

I leaned my head on the steering wheel, trying not to make a Magic the Gathering joke. "If people thought about why their brains follows certain patterns instead of steadfastly upholding those opinions, there would be no reason for conflict, because we would all realize that identities are structures and that certain reactions are preprogrammed by physiology. We gain and lose weight, dye our hair, even get elective surgery. How are we so objective about our bodies that we can do that but for some reason can’t objectify our feelings."

He snorted. You sound like the kid.

I approved the remark with a flick to the Batman bobblehead on my dashboard. The kid was the only person I knew who made any sense, and, half the time, he spoke in coding languages and mathematical jargon. Sorry. Perfect memory.

Well, he talks so much, some of it is bound to stick in anyone’s head, Matthew murmured, but I had stopped paying attention.

Outside my window, something had finally changed. For the first time in days, a dark car was moving slowly up the street, easing into the narrow loading zone at the front of the cramped, brown-stucco office building. Several men got out, each wearing an immaculate black suit, earpiece, and cuff mic, the old Sangha uniform.

Fucking cockmongers, I whispered. Smiths.

But they were not alone. They dragged a smaller shape that, even amongst the shadows of a moonless night, my perfect eyes could distinguish as a little girl. Tiny though she was, she pulled, kicked, and snarled, her bony elbows and knees turning her from a sweet child into an enraged insect stuck in a web. She had rich cocoa skin and dark eyes, but her hair was patchy and covered in filth. Her clothes were tattered, dirty, as if she’d been held prisoner in a basement somewhere, which she probably had been.

I felt the chill of recognition weave up through my vertebrae. She was their captive, as I had been, but unlike me she was defenseless. She couldn’t be more than ten or so, and from her bearing I could see she was no deceptively youthful immortal like Jinx. She was a little girl, terrified and alone. A familiar rage set my teeth on edge.

Matt, will you call the cavalry and tell them I’ve finally gotten lucky? I’ve gotta go.

I heard him click off the loudspeaker, You got it, Ninja Girl, but be careful.

Come on, I’m invincible. I turned on the ignition.

You didn’t let me finish. Be careful you don’t hurt anyone who doesn’t deserve it.

Aw, shucks. I hung up and put the pickup into drive, debating what I should do. I could race in and save the girl, or I could just observe. She could be dangerous, like the eyeless monsters in the cellars of the first sect we’d undone, but, ever the Big Sister, I yearned to help her.

As I came level with the scene, with no time left for indecisiveness, the men turned and looked in the direction of my coasting truck, and the girl, wits evidently intact, made use of the distraction, managing somehow to slip from their grasp.

It seemed almost impossible, physically, as if she suddenly disassembled and reformed beside them in a robotic, stop-motion kind of grace that left my stomach turning. Her captors were left looking after her in shock, their handcuffs and fists still closed. With a speed I knew had to be preternatural, she darted from the darkness and directly into the path of my truck.

I slammed on the brakes, expecting to feel the sickening crunch of the massive vehicle rolling over her tiny frame, but with no warning, she leaped into the air and landed, still growling, atop the hood, as elegantly as a winged creature.

I shot a look at the men, just in time to see them running for her and, not one to question fate, put the hammer down. The girl flattened herself on the hood, feral and lithe in the night, perched like some kind of bizarre hood ornament. In the amber light from the streetlamps, her eyes seemed to glow red, and in them was the expression of wild, animal instinct, of terror. She could not see me, did not know me for a friend. She was mad.

Emaciated, her bones jutted out at sharp angles to her torso. Thin skin was healing over a split lip. Her teeth were bared, and to my shock I realized that they were much larger than they should have been, and sharper, too. Her hands seemed overlarge, and long, dark claws curving out of her nail beds hooked into the plastic and steel of my truck. Salivating, her back slightly arched, she was unlike any Arhat I had seen before. She didn’t even look like any human I’d seen before.

As we rounded the corner, the henchmen still bounding after us in my rear view mirror, another car came around the bend. I hit the brake. As I did, the girl was thrown forward.

I gasped as my seat belt caught, for she was flying through the air, twisting like a cat. She didn’t hit the other vehicle but rebounded off it into a flying leap, arms reaching to grasp at whatever they found first. Before I could even make the turn, she had taken off down the street like a greyhound. Staring after her, my mouth wide, I didn’t even notice the black car growing larger in my mirror.

It slammed into me going full force and knocked the wind out of me, sending my pickup skidding into the other car. There was a crunch, the sound of glass sprinkling the hard surfaces of auto and road. Smashed between the two cars, I was unable to follow the girl, and, as I turned around and looked at the driver’s face, I could tell that that had been his intent.

Behind his, another sleek luxury car had exited the parking garage and was turning down a side street, on a collision course with the poor escapee.

Swearing, I threw open the car door. The innocent driver was shaking his head in wonder as he slid across the seats to the passenger door.

What the fuck were you doing? he was demanding of me, but, seeing he was all right, I didn’t bother to answer. I shot a glare at the Arhat behind the wheel of the black car and decided to show them what they hadn’t seen coming.

I took a deep breath and flexed every muscle, then with a burst of speed and strength born from complete focus, leaped over the joint where metal and plastic were crushed together, landed like a hare, and took off after the girl.

I didn’t know where she had gone, but something told me to run and she would find me.

Trees, homes, and signs whizzed past me as I tore down the street, a dark blur, my eyes tracking right and left, catching glimpses of colors and shapes. I spotted the car, two blocks ahead of me, screeching around a corner, and raced after it. It was skirting a park darkened by trees and shrubs. They were shining flashlights from the windows, searching for barefoot prints in the soft soil. I lurched across the street and, before they could stop me, shot diagonally through the park.

Behind me, the engine revved. They had spotted me and were moving to intercept.

Better me than her, I thought, just as I came out between two fence posts and sped through a crosswalk. As they caught up to me, the roar of the engine an ominous growl, I halted like the Road Runner and turned to stare them down.

The car slowed to a stop, the garish moons of their headlights burning my eyes. I crossed my arms defiantly as the doors opened and closed, expecting them to tackle me at any second. But suddenly a shadow swooped between us. Something wet spattered my face. I leaped back and looked at the cement at my feet.

The girl’s body lay mangled before me, lifeless. Her blood and brain matter covered us all from head to foot.

I sat bolt upright in a cold sweat and sucked in air. Sunlight set the border of the heavy blackout drapes aglow. Jinx had his headphones on and was muttering over his computer in French, vogueing like a nutcase with a hand stuck in his red hair and another gesticulating at a webcam. I breathed a sigh of defeat.

That made three attempts, none successful.

Hey, shortbus? I muttered to the technocrat.

He swiveled in his captain’s chair. Progress?

Maybe, but more importantly, how do you feel about powdered doughnuts?

Chapter 2

Fight or Flight

I tapped my foot impatiently while Jinx picked a random book off the return rack and snickered to himself in intellectual disgust.

Noetic science. O-M-G. They don’t tell you that the headquarters is located in a storefront in Petaluma.

I rolled my eyes. Stop being a jerk.

The librarian gave me a sympathetic smile, but Jinx was oblivious. They could learn a thing or two from L. Ron Hubbard, he muttered as he tossed the book down, and that’s saying a lot.

The evolution of knowledge is toward simplicity, not complexity, a deep voice quoted from somewhere to my right. My heart skipped like a stone. I turned, and there he stood, forbearing and regal as always, despite my sidekick’s constant histrionics.

Arthur, I said, my face muscles smiling so broadly that my jaw cramped. No man should ever be allowed to affect any woman as much, but then again Arthur wasn’t just any man.

Lilith, he nodded. And company.

Jinx clicked his tongue ring across his teeth. I cringed. This had become the warning of a rattlesnake about to strike, and my nerves could tolerate only so much. Since we’d embarked on our quest, the uber-geek had begun pacing and speaking in tongues more than a schizophrenic. If not for the Bluetooth device in his ear, I might have been concerned. I wasn’t sure what he was up to, but it seemed to involve slave labor and enough fiber-optic cable to strangle the Kraken.

I glared at him, daring him to get into an argument in the middle of the library. He rolled his eyes.

Yeah, well, fuck you too, Sid.

Arthur bowed, and order was restored to my universe.

He led us through the stacks to a table tucked into a corner. A pile of volumes had been collected, and my mentor appeared to have painstakingly transcribed every card-catalogue number onto a notepad. I glanced at it, marveling at the unexceptional quality of his handwriting. No loops, no funny tildes, just block letters. It was almost disappointing.

You know about computers, right? They have these things called spread-sheets. I giggled, leaning in to peck him on the cheek.

He shrugged and took a seat. They don’t like me.

Jinx snorted. Quickest way to kill an AI is to feed it a paradox.

My jaw dropped open. It made a kind of sense. I was a real intelligence, and I still had trouble with Arthur.

Actually, the technical support person banished me, Arthur said with a shrug. Something about interference.

I expected Jinx to make another wise crack, but his face was suddenly the home of an impressive scowl. He sat down with a loud thump and folded his hands in a wholly dignified fashion that was so uncharacteristic, it was amusing.

Lilith, tell him what you’ve seen.

I looked between them and lost my nerve. Two of the smartest people I had met: one the only human to speak fluent binary and the other a living god. As a moment of dizziness overtook me, my recurring visions of a shape-shifting girl suddenly didn’t seem to matter quite so much. Visions were a new thing for me, after all. What if I had gotten something wrong?

I fell into a chair and took a deep breath. No point in being sheepish. Arthur seemed to be a telepath of some sort, and Jinx would tease information out of me with swearwords I’d never heard before. The details tumbled out of me. I kept my voice low but, recalling her filthy shape as it twisted through the air like some kind of specter, pitched my voice on the edge of hysteria.

"I’ve tried a bunch of different approaches, you know, projecting forward, doing what I would have done, and every time, she dies. The same way. She falls and hits the ground. I can’t stop it." I tipped forward and closed my eyes.

What makes you think you are meant to stop it? Arthur said, recording another filing number and making notes about the state of the binding.

I threw a look at Jinx. All his youthful snark was gone. His face had again assumed that weird composure held by all immortals many years my senior. Not for the first time, I wondered who he was, or who he had been when he’d discovered the idea, the thing that had frozen him in time.

Art, she’s just a fracking girl, he hissed, shattering my reverie.

Arthur shrugged. And how many times have you been able to purchase your own cigarettes?

The perpetually youthful face full of piercings twitched. The message was clear: not everything is as it seems. Some immortals were centuries old and didn’t look a day over eighteen.

Don’t you think we should at least check it out?

If this girl is real, I reasoned, then what she did...it’s not like anything I’ve seen before. And if the Sangha keeps her prisoner, then won’t she be on our side?

She struggles to free herself so that she may die. What makes you think they are harming her? Could they not be protecting her from herself?

Infallible logic, that.

I tapped my fingers on the table and chewed my lip. Arthur was a difficult one to interpret. Since we’d met, there had been many times when his advice had been directly opposed to whatever it was he wanted. He seemed to direct by not directing, and it drove me nuts.

So is that a no, or is that a yes?

The copper of his face smoothed into a smile. Lilith, you will do whatever you must, but your visions have never been accurate. The version of you that is relaying that information is only telling you what you need to hear.

I stood up and leaned over his work. "Well, then I say she’s telling me to save the girl. I mean, why else would she keep showing me the same thing? If I have to be splattered with guts one more time, I’m going to jump."

His face lifted, and those perfect, incandescent blue eyes caught my gaze. Trapped and happy to be, I stared back, wishing he could feel the depths of my sincerity.

How can saving someone be a bad idea? I insisted in spite of my growing blush.

What about your reasons for saving them? he said. Can you honestly, with your purest self, say that your desire to help this girl is not, at least in part, a selfish one?

I blinked, stunned. How could wanting to save someone be a selfish desire? Then I thought of Eva. If I had tried to stop her from jumping off the hotel as I’d longed to, how outraged would she have been? It was that act that had set everything in motion, that act that had cemented our relationship even though we were parted forever. My silence was enough of an answer.

You are very quick to focus on a target, Arthur sighed. This is one of your greatest strengths and will also be your most crippling weakness, if you are not cautious.

Often, I found that I had to really consider his words carefully. Normally, I would be hurt, but there was some unexplainable draw surrounding Arthur that made it impossible to think him an enemy. It more than likely had something to do with his unique state of being, but he would never tell anyone any details about his life after his supposed death. He had only ever spoken to me once about it, and in the forgiving shades of vagueness.

I can’t help what I am, Arthur. I can’t help wanting to keep what happened to Eva from happening to someone I can save.

He sighed. "I am proud of you for that conviction, Lilith. However, decisions must be made from neutrality and calm, from the foundation of your character."

What does that mean? Jinx hissed. Either you care or you don’t. Who the fuck cares why? I bet the high-diving were-chick could give two shits as long as her melon doesn’t end up smeared on a Smith’s boots.

Arthur ignored him. What you really want is for people to have a better life, but sometimes people must save themselves. The most important lessons are self-taught. No dishonest man can be free. He is his own trap, as someone once said.

Jinx’s outrage began to rev, and, with my guard down, I could already hear what was going to say and in what decibel he was going to say it. I winced, wishing I could have absorbed the talent of someone named Mime.

No! Jinx shouted. "Not fair! You don’t get to quote science fiction at us you antediluvian Mephistopheles! And least of all that hypergraphic prophet-teer."

Several voices shushed him at once. He twitched as if the insults were flea bites and looked around at the book shelves with a paranoid scowl.

Art, I just think she’s important, I said in a soothing voice. I think I at least need to learn more about her.

He sighed. Lilith, your actions cannot always be a reflection of the loss of your sister. You are much more than that one tragedy.

But if I forget….

Moving beyond does not mean forgetting. Your sister knew what she was doing when she jumped. If you regret her choice or lament her passing, you are dishonoring what she did.

A lance of self-conscious bitterness skewered me to the spot. I sputtered, but nothing came out. The betrayal was overwhelming. If not for this man and his metaphysical mumbo-jumbo, I’d still be a normal woman. Well, maybe a grief-stricken she-bitch, but human at least.

Jinx shook his fire-engine head and grabbed my wrist. "Come on, Lily, let’s bug. This place gives me the creeps, all these fucking pages."

You know, I managed finally, pulling myself out of Jinx’s grasp to press my fists to my hips, I’m getting really tired of these games. I wish you would just spit out whatever it is you know instead of hinting all the time.

He looked away, and it felt like exile. I am saying what must be said.

Yeah, well, maybe Ananda will have something more illuminating to say. I turned to stomp down to the children’s section where the fourth member of our group, Arthur’s cousin, had camped out. Initially he had gravitated toward the fairy tales but had somehow been recruited by the head librarian to lead story time until the end of the world. He was slowly developing a Feydakin of five year olds, and parents were having a hard time reclaiming their young. It was really no surprise. He had a way of making everyone feel instantly at ease.

Let’s go, Jinx.

He’s in the middle of a Harry Potter novel. I wouldn’t disturb him, Arthur warned. Unless you fancy being chased by toddlers with magic wands.

Scowling at my ninja shoes, I dragged my cohort back out to the entrance and threw him down on a concrete bench.

Fuck! I shouted to the air in general.

A woman with expectant preschooler in tow staggered away as if I’d punched her.

Here, here! Jinx said, dusting himself off. "I told you traveling with them was going to get old. You ask what the weather is like, and they think they’re oh-so-fucking clever when they hold up a finger. When will you learn?"

"Well you’d think the Buddha would be a little more compassionate!"

Jinx coughed. Right. But then he’d have to stop quoting Scientology.

I collapsed next to him and leaned against a pale green mural that looked like something Egyptians would paint if they knew about circuit boards. I stared at it, thinking it seemed like a visual metaphor of my life among this elite slayer squad. Suddenly the romance of our little mission had faded.

I thought back on the mysterious girl, her battered, skinny body, her hollowed eyes, her suicidal leap, and felt my chest clamp down. Arthur was right, a pox on his head. I was still trying to save Eva, but that was impossible. Eva was dead and buried. This shape-shifting girl was not my sister, and yet….

I know I’m supposed to help her, I whispered to myself. I know I am. But really, what did I know? My visions were always vague, handed down to me by Future Lilith, an arrogant wench who had already lived through whatever it was I was facing. Screw immortality and all its sundry evolutionary gifts. It was beginning to piss me off.

Jinx was checking his iPhone and rocking in place, already suffering from cyber-withdrawal. I mean seriously, what kind of answer is ‘Mu’? It’s how a cow goes, not how you answer a question about the indivisibility of the soul! Fuck Joshu. That jackoff can walk home down one of his non-roads, the asshat.

I blinked, pulled back to my insane reality by his endless madness. Cuss words and Zen koans. Speaking to these people felt like living with the Mad Hatter and Deepak Chopra.

Clean cup, Namasté.

Will there be anything in those files about that location? I pinched my nose.

Jinx scrolled over some windows and nodded. Yeah. Didn’t have an address. Apparently everyone knows where it is because it’s not a full sanctuary. It’s kind of like the Underground Railroad, you know? A place where any member of the Sangha can come to be safe.

"They need to be safe? I gasped. It seemed to me like there should be a place where other people could go to be safe from them. Don’t they have abilities?"

He made a weird hissing sound. Not everyone has abilities that help preserve their immortality, Lily. Some of them can only tell if people are lying, remember?

I clenched my fists.

You look pretty stoppable to me, bitch.

The words echoed in my head like one of Jinx’s tirades, and with just as much ire. It was bad enough I had stabbed Ursula through the chest with her own knife, but did I have to stand over her and gloat while she died? Even though she had been a scary witch with a penchant for waving her victims’ secrets around in front of a large group of salivating mortals, I still felt a twinge of guilt for it. Not one of my finest moments.

I should have listened to Arthur.

But if I had, I would not have seen the depth of my sister’s knowledge or how threatened the Sangha was by her. Indeed, I would not have known about the Sangha at all, if not for Ursula’s last words. They had also been my first hint that Arthur was not what he seemed.

That’s a low blow, Jinx.

At least it’s not a sharp one.

I’m one second away from punching you.

His fingerless black gloves rose in defeat. Cool your heels, Balboa. I’m just saying they might be on the lam since you moseyed into town.

"And how is it exactly that they know I’m in town?" I crossed my arms. It was a fair question. I was unique among the immortal race in that no one seemed to be able to use their gifts to predict my movements. So how was it possible that the Sangha knew anything about what I was up to?

He fluffed his hair. The deep crimson reflected off his pale skin in a harsh, unflattering blush.

I don’t know, Lily, I’m not the oracle.

So what should we do?

Go to the mattresses.

I raised a brow. You want me to attack them?

No, I want you to gather more data on the psychic plain. Duh. He dragged me to my feet. Fuck, you’re so violent. What kind of Buddhist are you?

The kind that believes that death is a beginning. 

He danced away from me and beat me to my pickup truck. As we drove back to our hotel room, he remained bent over his device, ignoring me and my vengeful wrath. I fumed and fumed, reliving each iteration of my vision. The first time I had seen the girl, she had not transformed. That was a new development. So was that real or was that something I needed to hold my attention? Why was the Sangha holding a little girl captive? And the most interesting question of all, one that had not even occurred to me until Arthur brought it up: Did she even need saving?

I pulled into our parking space. Holding his phone up so that he could look at it and the ground at the same time, Jinx followed me up the stairs to our room. I fished the key out of his pocket while his drumstick thumbs danced a tattoo across the touchscreen. I smiled, wondering if someday soon we would even need thumbs anymore, if thoughts would just appear on screens for anyone to see.

The little green light of welcome blinked as I opened our door, but a sense of something out of place drew me up short. Before I knew what to make of the sensation, my vision blackened. As if the immortal light of the sun had just shut off, I blinked furiously into complete darkness, grabbed for the stability of the doorframe while the ground seemed to drop from beneath me. Jinx bumped into me and let out a string of invectives turned upward into a question, but my mind was fishing through an abyss, looking for even the faintest sign of light. I ran my hand upward, and where it touched, smoky tendrils of light began to congeal, sweeping over the black in a caress. The shimmering fog collected, twisted into moving shapes, and took the vague form of a man.

Lily, what the shit? Jinx grumbled. This is not fucking bumper cars!

I swallowed down my rising gorge and squeezed the doorframe. My recent life had been so full of this kind of strangeness that I had learned not to question. Pretty soon, I would be expecting a blue caterpillar to drop onto my shoulder and ask who I was.

Stay here, I commanded in a voice that sounded more like a growl.

The suggestion of a man gained solidity, and soon I could discern his features with absolute clarity. He was standing beside Jinx’s desk, looking at the conglomerated electronic outpost of several laptops. He didn’t move to turn it on, play with the keys, or jiggle the mouse; he just stood there, staring at it, his tailored suit and ear piece a radiant shade of violet.

Right after Eva died, I had begun to experience bizarre presentiments, flashes of things that had not happened, but this felt distinctly different. I felt as if I was seeing something hidden, something that had transpired in the recent past, and just the thought of it chilled me.

His face was unfamiliar, but he was dressed like every other immortal that had ever tried to kill me, trap me, or otherwise torture me, and here he was, in my room, rummaging through my belongings. My rational mind was scribbling mental notes that he was some sort of seer. He had learned through centuries of study how to read the world, trace the echoes we unwittingly recorded on the environment. I became sure that he was

Reviews for The One We Feed

[bookwyrmm_1 · Rating: 1 out of 5 stars]

At first, I thought my confusion was because I had not read the first book in the series, but after reading a while and not catching on, I just realized the story itself was confusing me. The whole time, I felt in a fog, never truly understanding the characters.

[sadiesforsythe · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

While I enjoyed the humor, the geekery and the actual writing, and I really do think it presents a thought provoking philosophy, I was generally disappointed in this book. The reason for this actually started in book one, with the too perfect heroine. It only gets worse here. Essentially, Lilith is indestructible and she knows it. So, there is no challenge to her from anyone, which means no challenge to the reader. This whole book is her wandering around making witty quips, teasing Jinx (who I adore), and almost lazily figuring a thing or two out. Oh sure, there are some fight scenes, but she’s faster, stronger, smarter, more invisible, more skilled, etc than any of her opponents, so the result is a foregone conclusion and comes far too quickly. It’s dull, no matter how much action is happening.The book also falls into what I consider a tempting trap when dealing with immortality. All of a sudden, almost everyone Lilith meets is a famous historical character. All the billions of people who have lived throughout history and the immortals happen to be ones we’d have heard of?The book is worth reading to engage the Buddhist (and such) arguments, but it doesn’t have quite the flare and appeal as the first book, in my opinion.

[disco_grinch · Rating: 2 out of 5 stars]

Received this book free for an HONEST review. This is MY OPINION.I found the book to be slow and drawn out. The dialog was obviously written with an ATTEMPT to be witty. The writing style was good and it seemed that the author did quite well with the editing or hired an editor (I didn't see any blazing mistakes). But, I wasn't drawn into the story or the characters at all and I found their discussions/conversations to be bland and "flat".Usually when I write a short review, it means I cared so little for the book that I didn't want to spend anymore time on it. Longer reviews mean I either loved it or hated it so bad that I want to take the time to blast it...this explanation was longer than my critique of this book - enough said.

[jayblac21 · Rating: 2 out of 5 stars]

I purchased the first book in the series from amazon so I would not be completely lost I was able to get through it but it took months because it was hard to keep your attention on it. I get what the author is trying to do with this series I think she just makes it to complicated you have to concentrate too hard to understand and get into the book. I found this book very hard to get into the philosophical twist and turns were hard to keep up with I couldn't even finish the book because I found it hard to keep my attention on it.

[bgknighton · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Teceived from Early Reviewers. I had a little trouble with this one. It probably would have helped if I had read the first book in the series. It is a little dense in spots without the background. I liked Jinx a lot. The characters are beginning to come together as a group. Unfortunately, Lilith comes across as the crazy girl your friend dates and warns you about.

[katyas_26 · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Book Info: Genre: Dark Urban Fantasy/Metaphysical ThrillerReading Level: AdultRecommended for: Those to whom it calls, those interested in something more, deeperTrigger Warnings: fighting, violence, killing, suicideMy Thoughts: The books in the Apocalyptic Series are a strange beast. Mixing action with metaphysics, Buddhism, and a completely open way of looking at the world, we experience the evolution of Lilith from what she was toward what she could be. She's a great character, but I liked all the characters in this book. Jinx is, as in the first book, a complete delight; Arthur is cryptic, and Ananda is... Ananda. We meet Devlin (and I was so psyched when I found out who he originally was! I figured it out before Lilith, but in her defense it was one of my favorite topics so I caught the hints she did not) and Mara, and find out that everything is not always as it seems.There is still so much to explore in this universe. I do not know when/if there will be another book in this series, but I know I'll be watching for it, because this is just the sort of mind-twisting that I find most irresistible. If you're looking for deeper meaning, if you enjoy reading things that will twist your brain and make you think, if you are interested in metaphysical ideas of time and space, definitely check out this amazing series.Series Information: The Apocalyptic SeriesBook 1: Craving, review linked hereBook 2: The One We FeedDisclosure: I received a copy of this book from JournalStone through the LibraryThing Early Reviewers Program in exchange for an honest review. All opinions are my own.Synopsis: After the bizarre suicide of her sister, Lilith Pierce discovered that the world was full of dangers and villains she could not have imagined, and that the history of human civilization was far from complete. Now, gifted with tremendous powers she barely understands, Lilith is determined to stop whatever plots and schemes her immortal cousins, the Sangha, can hatch. When a simple reconnaissance mission ends in tragedy; however, Lilith’s entire focus changes.Attempting to save a child she's never met from a fate worse than death will require every ounce of Lilith’s strength, forge new and treacherous alliances, and possibly change the world forever. Suddenly all eyes are on her, and the destiny of the human race is on her shoulders. A thrill ride with soul for a new generation of thinkers!

[wolffaerie17 · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

Lilith(Lily) Pierce isn't sure who she is any more and still grieving over her sister Eva's death. Lily's sidekick Jinx is master computer programmer and immortal tries to help Lily cope. Lily doesn't really trust Devlin or Arthur much yet needs them any way. Ananda is Buddha but isn't troubled by how other perceive him. The Sangha and The Smiths are always after Lily and she has to stay one step ahead of them. Mara is moving everyone around like chess pieces for his own advantages. Petula can see many things and is Mara's hostage. Can Mara be stopped? Will Lily learn to accept her loss? What does Arthur know that Lily doesn't? Are the Sangha and Smiths so bad? Your answers await you in The One We Feed.To be honest I feel like I'm missing information that could better help me understand the ins and outs of this book better. That being said I did find this book fascinating as far as the lore and myths presented. Overall the book was an easy read for me.

[lesliejung_1 · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

really liked the characters - their energy and verve - but i did not really get the nature of their world - or what the rules are - our heroine jumps in and out of metaphysical planes, and i gather she is in mortal danger and, yet, that she is immortal with special powers and a lost sister who'd been killed - the warmth of the people is terrific, i just wish i could figure out what's quite happening. i hope Meister continues....

[saginawhorror · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

Was a little hard to understand at the beginning because I hadn't read book 1, but I eventually understood it fairly well. Can't wait to read book 3.

[pixiedark · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

I received this book from Library Thing Early Reviewers. "The One We Feed" is the second book in the second book in "The Apocalyptic Series" In the first book "Craving" Lilith Pierce has to deal with the bizarre suicide of her sister Eva. In this book Lilith has visions of a young child that she needs to rescue. Lilith has to save this unique child from a fate worse than death. During "The One We Feed" Lilith has to form alliances with people she once thought were enemies. I thought this book had believable characters and the interaction between them was realistic. Everyone had their own agenda but in the end they realized they all had to work together. This book had an excellent balance of suspense and action. A lot of gore was thrown in to satisfy any fan of horror. I am looking forward to the third book in "The Apocalyptic Series." I can't wait to see what Lilith plans next for humanity.

[loafhunter13 · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

This is the second book in Kristina Meister's The Apocalyptic Series which follows Lilith Pierce. She is dealing with major life changes as well as changes to her very perception of reality. A deft mixture of world religion, myth, folklore, technology, and strong characters are all well employed in this book. Like many reviewers, I too had not read the first book in the series. Within a few chapters, however, one is able to grasp enough of the plot and flow of the series that this no longer presents a challenge. That is a credit to the author for mapping out her story arc and following a narrative. The story pulls many ideas and themes from recent best-selling modern fantasy novels such as, dare I say, Twilight. It fortunately exceeds that series by clever use of modern vocabulary, character development, and better writing. The story is interesting enough and a reviewer reading this book would be inclined to go back to read the first of the series if they had not to understand the story's development. That is perhaps the biggest compliment I could bestow on the book. It is a decent piece of work with enough quality writing to make people who are not fans of the genre want to read the books to better understand the well designed story. That in mind, despite the use of modern language and references, pop culture, technology, etc., it is immediately limiting its appeal to audiences in a few years at most. The wry nature of nearly every character in the book is a symbol of the times, where every character in popular media has to be too cool, sarcastic, and unshakable by even the biggest of events. This does make the book topical in many regards but also can cause a level of detachment on the part of the reader as even in a book filled with immortals, psychics, invisibility, and other fantasy elements, it detracts from the believable nature of the characters as people. The main character in particular suffers from perhaps too much favoritism on the part of the author. Her invulnerability and ability to overcame everything but the one plot point that set her story in motion is repetitive and somewhat off-putting. Meister creates a colorful world and interesting supporting characters which do make the story have appeal but it feels like she projects too much into the main character which is jarring at time. This book is interesting enough and the writer is skilled. The book draws the reader in enough to encourage interest in future and previous works. The writing is defined by the period it was written and that will make it limited in its appeal to those not versed in the references and language. The main character lacks enough conflict, both inner and outer to carry the story with strong long-arc plot points and sub-characters. Overall positive review but some kinks to work out.

[bookjunkie32 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

I had a hard time catching up with the story . My only problem with this book was that I had not read the first in the series. I felt lost and didn't understand what went on a lot of the time. I did like the writing style and the fact that the characters were enjoyable. Maybe a brief synopsis of the previous book would help on that front.

[carod_51 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

The One we Feed is the second book in Kristina Meister's The Apocalyptic Series following the adventures of Lilith Pierce as she continues to deal with her sister’s suicide and the changes that have happened to her since. The series involves Buddhist, Hindu, and Christian folklore as well as pop culture references and geek speak. It picks up where the first book, Craving, left off, with no back story or explanation. I would recommend that readers start with the first book if they wish to understand the story. Lilith is still struggling with the transformation she underwent in the first book. She goes through much angst and soul searching which could have been tedious if it weren't for the wry humour of her narration. I found myself laughing aloud at some of her commentary. All of the old characters , as well as new villains and allies are fully described and interesting. As in the first book, some of the author's premises require a major suspension of disbelief, and some of the characters' motivations remain unclear. This novel has more violence and gruesome monsters than the first volume in the series. As in the first book there is some objectionable language which may offend some readers. I recommend this book for readers of urban fantasy who enjoy elements of philosophy, history and religion in their fantasy.

[lexiesmom-1 · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

I received this book to review under the Library Thing early reviewers program. This book is the second book in a series. I believe that in order to truly enjoy the book and understand what is happening. That being said, the book was well written and the plot flowed nicely. The characters, while difficult to understand with the back story, were easy to like. The pictures that the author painted brought the reader into the story. I could see Amanda sitting it the tree and later talking to the copsI would recommend the book but for maximum enjoyment I would strongly suggest reading volume one.

[mmoj_2 · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

I received this book from LibraryThing as one of the Early Reviewers Giveaway. This is the second in a series and the first book really needs to be read before reading this book. I did not and I'm sure that this impacted how I felt about the book.The story is a continuation of Lilith Pierce and her continued journey towards becoming. While she works towards this becoming she has visions of a child who might or might not need rescuing. While their were moments of enlightenment most of the book, I felt, tried to answer too many questions and just became this mashup of vampire, werewolf, other mythical creatures, Buddhism, Zen with some old-fashioned wisdom thrown in. The highlight for me was when the author wrote about the relationship between one of the characters and her grandma. The writing was good but I just couldn't get passed all the beliefs/values that were presented.

[slynnmizell · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Meister writes a tale that is complex but enjoyable and entertaining to unravel. I did not read the first book in The Apocalyptic Series, so it took a while to sort some things out, but no big problem there. There are a wide array of characters that I found intriguing to get to know.

[exploreacademy · Rating: 1 out of 5 stars]

This book did not make much sense. I don't know if it is because I did not read the first book of the series or if the characters were not defined enough. By the end I could understand some of the weird happenings or transformations of the people in the book. I liked the powers that the main character accumulated, but at the end I was still not sure exactly how she did it. Willing suspension of disbelief I guess.

[landwaster_1 · Rating: 2 out of 5 stars]

Difficult to review, since I didn't read the first book in the series. Usually that's not a problem, but with this book it really was a show-stopper. Right up through the last page I was still trying to figure out what in the world was going on. The writing style was fine, so a simple two-page "what has gone before" would have made all the difference. Without it, pretty much the entire story was incomprehensible to me.

[josephlyoung · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Initially I found this a difficult book to read but, once I was able to catalog the various characters and had some idea about their interplay, it became an interesting book. I enjoyed the obscure references to various religious and literary characters particularly the more obscure ones. I could have used a religious reference book or perhaps a reference book to older Norse myths. I recognized a lot of names but, seems to have forgotten the stories that gave meaning to the names. As the book headed to it's conclusion, the actions and interplay between characters began to make more sense. In retrospect, I expect to read this book several more times to get a better understanding of the author's intent. It is definitely a challenging read and gives lots of food for thought. Highly recommend it to inquiring minds and suggest readers take the time to properly digest the meanings and intent. A great book for understanding the religious mysteries. Give it a chance!

[shoosty · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

I read the first book in this series a while ago so when I started with this book it took sometime before the story came back to me. It continues with the story of Lilith and her friends as they combat the Sangha. I enjoyed the story line and the characters and it kept me interested until the end with new twists and turns. One thing that did distract from the story was the slang and over use of crude language.

[cq081-1 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Second in Kristina Meister's The Apocalyptic Series, the book contains enough references to the events of Craving to give me a sense of the flow of things without spoiling either book for me (other than giving away Craving's ending). The dialogue is tight and realistic, the story telling great! There are long passages of deeply philosophical thought which anyone looking for a light read can safely skim, yet for me these were some of the best hmmm-ers of the book. It delights by going in unexpected directions which are perfectly clear in hindsight IF you didn't skip the long philosophical passages.A thoroughly delightful read which may not be to everybody's tastes. Highly recommended for those who don't mind deep thought with their horror action tales.I'm reviewing an ARC of the ePub edition.

[charles_ray_60 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

The One We Feed by Kristina Meister is a chilling story that will keep you awake at night. Lilith is an immortal working with mortal cops to go after the Sangha. While on a stakeout, she sees a group of Sangha members with a captive, a little girl. As Lilith rushes to the girl’s rescue, she discovers that the child is something else – something beyond imagining. The question for Lilith then becomes, who in that tableau needed saving?Gritty dialogue and graphic descriptions take you into a netherworld of the undead and the soon to be dead. You’ll smell the blood and sweat and hear the rapid panic-inspired beating of hearts. Meister is aptly names, for she is a meister of the genre. A writer who is destined to take her place in the galaxy of horror fiction stars.When you open the pages of The One We Feed make sure your seat belt is fastened because you’re in for one hell of a wild ride.