What About Me? The 17 Million Children in Child Support

By Veronica Ragland

What About Me? The 17 Million Children in Child Support encourages child support practitioners and parents to collaborate for the sake of their child. Nearly 17 million children in the U.S., one in four, receive child support services. With the rise in single parenting and associated negative child outcomes, the child support program has developed the authority, programs, and services that can support co-parents' efforts to collaborate and improve child outcomes. What About Me? provides tips to practitioners and encourages parents to take responsibility for the gaps in their situation and relationships and utilize child support's authority and resources to improve child outcomes. Shortly after I became a statewide child support director, my office received a call from a local police officer requesting a file for an active child support case. It contained evidence of a fierce child support and custody battle between the co-parents. The father had just shot and killed the mother of their child before turning the gun on himself in the parking lot of their child’s day care. Instantly, the child became an orphan as she played safely inside. This book is intended to help parents and practitioners avoid the stress of participating in the child support system—not their responsibility to their child.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Veronica Ragland
• Release date: Aug 1, 2014
• ISBN: 9780692257692

Veronica Ragland

Veronica M. Hart Ragland served as one of the statewide child support program directors for nearly six years after serving as an administrator for four years. During Veronica’s tenure (2003 to 2012), Arizona increased its overall standing from 51st to 27th place (unofficial standing) of 54 child support programs. The state narrowly avoided a multi-million dollar penalty for performance during her first year then catapulted to reporting the highest paternity numbers for many consecutive years afterward. Arizona earned a Most Improved State Award in 2008. Veronica served on several state and federal committees charged with reviewing and developing child support policy and guidelines and considering the impact of the federal child support performance measures. Prior to state service, Veronica served as an Attorney and Supplier Diversity Manager for Honeywell International where she earned a Six Sigma Certification. She was a Law Clerk in Arizona’s Superior Court where she became a Certified Arbitrator and a Project Manager for several Fortune 100 companies while completing her J.D. at Georgetown University Law Center. She also held several technical writing and marketing positions in the public and private sectors after completing a B.S. from Arizona State University. Veronica currently serves as an Executive Director of a nonprofit and resides in Arizona with her husband and two daughters.

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ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

I wish to acknowledge, Jerry C. Hart, Jr., Adrienne Hart, Marcus Blunt, Stephen Meissner, Delores Klokinos, Christina Taylor, Joshua Becker and Five J’s Design for your guidance, assistance and encouragement.

To my husband, Joe, and to my daughters, Isa and Salima, who encouraged me through the publication of this book.

And, to my dad and mom who fed my love of books and never caused me to ask What about me?

PREFACE

Can’t we all get along? –Rodney King

Shortly after I became a statewide child support director, my office received a call from a local police officer requesting a file for an active child support case. It contained evidence of a fierce child support and custody battle between the co-parents. The father had just shot and killed the mother of their child before turning the gun on himself in the parking lot of their child’s day care. Instantly, the child became an orphan as she played safely inside. Such stories are too common in the child support world.

When searching popular book-purchasing sites for child support titles, all I saw were books, self-help and fiction, that prey on the division between co-parents and between the child support program and parents—fathers specifically.  The covers of such titles have pictures of guns, hand-cuffs, and child support checks, and they claim to offer advice on how to avoid payments and even suggest that child support system kills.  At a glance, none of the books encouraged co-parents to work with each other or the program. None suggested that the welfare of the child is the priority.

I saw one private self-help title that offered an unbiased, technical approach to child support by educating its readers on the child support program and legal procedures. The majority of encouragement for parents to work with each other and the program comes from communications by the Federal Office of Child Support or several fatherhood and family groups that are connected with a variety of government initiatives.

I found almost no encouragement for co-parents to work with each other or the child support program for the sake of the child in print. With all the stress and disturbing child outcomes that result from the years of fighting legal battles and program bureaucracy, I decided to write this book.

What About Me?  The 17 Million Children in Child Support reminds co-parents and practitioners why child support exists.  It  provides tips to  practitioners and encourages parents to take responsibility for the gaps in their situation and relationships, and to collaborate for their sake and the sake of the reported 17 million U.S. children, one in four children living in the United States, who receive child support services.  This book is intended to help parents and practitioners avoid the stress of participating in the child support system—not their responsibility to their child.

Divorce and child support continue to be among the top 10 most stressful life events as noted in several updates to the Social Readjustment Rating Scale.  What About Me? The 17 Million Children in Child Support teaches parents and practitioners to use existing child support services, manage their case diligently, and consider collaborative approaches throughout the child support process. This book encourages practitioners and parents to collaborate for their sake and for the sake of the millions of children around the world who receive child support services.

INTRODUCTION

You are not managing an inconvenience, you are raising a human being. –Kittie Franz

In a perfect world, every parent would be financially and emotionally responsible for their child; and no child would live in poverty. Co-parents would treat each other kindly, whether or not the other parent deserved such treatment. In our world, over 40 percent of all American children are born to unmarried parents. Nearly 50 percent of all marriages end in divorce, and women are the head of 80 percent of all single-parent households. A 2012 New York Times article calls households headed by single moms the new normal across Middle America.

In 2013, one in four American children received child support services. The child support program reported that it paid over $31.9 billion to families, although over 36 cents of every dollar of ordered monthly child support went unpaid. And 40.9 percent of all households headed by single women lived in poverty according to 2012 US Census Bureau reports. Such statistics suggest that there is a very real societal need for child support services.

What About Me? encourages co-parents to take responsibility for their relationship with their co-parent and to actively manage their child support for the sake of their child. Working out issues about children and money is difficult even for the most stable of parent relationships. This book does not suggest that it’s easy between co-parents who have decided that marriage is not currently an option. But cooperation, collaboration, and communication are necessary to minimize stress in child support matters and to give a child the chance to thrive despite his parents’ decisions.

Co-parents need to love their child more than they dislike their ex. And practitioners need to prefer efficiency over waste, chose quality over quantity, shift resources to address the current child support priorities, and find creative ways to help co-parents meet their child support obligations and support each other. Parents, practitioners, and taxpayers benefit when program resources are used to support rather than force co-parents’