The Love Quest of Smidgen the Snack Cake

By Robert Jeschonek

Beware the snack cake from Hell! Junk food genius Smidgen meets the woman of his dreams at a twisted supermarket of tomorrow. But going home with her just leaves him wanting more. If only his sweet talk could get his lady-love to break her diet and eat him up. She refuses to go all the way, but this devilish pastry won't take no for an answer. He'll stop at nothing to become her dessert. Even if it means death will be the frosting on her cake. Don't miss this exciting tale by award-winning storyteller Robert T. Jeschonek, a master of unique and unexpected science fiction that really packs a punch.

Contents
Short story plus novel preview

Reviews

"Robert T. Jeschonek is a towering talent." --Mike Resnick, Hugo and Nebula Award-winning author of the Starship series

"Robert Jeschonek is the literary love child of Tim Burton and Neil Gaiman--his fiction is cutting edge, original, and pulsing with dark and fantastical life. His stories suck me in and refuse to let me go until the last page, even as his characters are busy stealing my heart." – Adrian Phoenix, critically acclaimed author of The Maker's Song series and Black Dust Mambo

"This story seems absurd until you begin to consider how much information everyone wants about us all the time. The ideas of privacy are becoming more important and less interesting to many people all at the same time and this story shows where we may end up, with only a few liberties taken to make the story more interesting." – Elton Gahr, Helium.com

"Jeschonek ́s stories are delightfully insane, a pleasure to read..." – Fabio Fernandes, Fantasy Book Critic

About the Author

Robert T. Jeschonek is an award-winning writer whose fiction, comics, essays, articles, and podcasts have been published around the world. DC Comics, Simon & Schuster, and DAW Books have published his work. His young adult urban fantasy novel, My Favorite Band Does Not Exist, is now available from Clarion Books/Houghton Mifflin Harcourt and was named one of Booklist’s Top Ten First Novels for Youth.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Robert Jeschonek
• Release date: May 8, 2010
• ISBN: 9781452397894

Book preview

The Love Quest of Smidgen the Snack Cake

The Love Quest of Smidgen the Snack Cake

A SCIFI STORY

ROBERT JESCHONEK

Blastoff Books

Contents

Also by Robert Jeschonek

The Love Quest of Smidgen the Snack Cake

About the Author

Special Preview: Six Scifi Stories Volume Four

THE LOVE QUEST OF SMIDGEN THE SNACK CAKE

Copyright © 2023 by Robert Jeschonek

www.bobscribe.com

Cover Art Copyright © 2023 by Alan F. Beck

This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

All rights reserved by the author.

Published by Blastoff Books

An Imprint of Pie Press

411 Chancellor Street

Johnstown, Pennsylvania 15904

www.piepresspublishing.com

Subscribe to the Blastoff Books Newsletter: http://newsletter.blastoffbooks.net

Also by Robert Jeschonek

Battlenaut Crucible

Scifi Motherlode

Six Scifi Stories Volume One

Six Scifi Stories Volume Two

Six Scifi Stories Volume Three

Six Scifi Stories Volume Four

Sticks and Stones: A Trek Novel

The Spinach Can's Son

Universal Language

The Love Quest of Smidgen the Snack Cake

First off, it’s important you know that snack cakes do not feel guilt.  That is why, even with the corpse of my lover here before me, all I can think of is finding someone else to take me in.  To eat me. Fulfill me.

Love me.

It is my nature and purpose.  It is the only reason I was created.  It is why, even as the pungent smells of my lover’s decomposing body reach the rudimentary olfactory cells in my ultrachocolate frosting, I softly whistle my lilting mating call, casting about for a new precious soul mate to embrace me gently with supple fingers and raise me toward the blissful warmth and moisture of the glistening portal all pink flesh and bright white teeth and then when I cannot stand the anticipation a single moment more BITE DOWN and grant me the blinding wild release I have craved for as long as I can remember.

Oh PLEASE someone find me here and eat me!  I have been created with cutting edge late-21 st century biobaking technology to grant you the ultimate sweet eating euphoria.  Pay no attention to the woman on the floor, or at least give me a chance to PLEASE you before you tend to her.  You won’t be sorry.

She