Life Is Hard, So What? You Must Be Harder

By E. Lara, Sr

Have you ever asked yourself why there are thousands and thousands of self-help, improvement, success, finance, and personal relationship books? And why some of these are best sellers? Why there are people who live succeeding and succeeding and some others barely make ends meet? Why are hospitals full of people who suffer from stress? Why do the psychiatrists’ and psychologists’ offices have long lines of people waiting to be attended? Why is it that there are more poor people in the world? Why? If there are millions of people who read books and go to workshops and seminars, why don ́t they achieve the success they desire? What keeps those people from being happy? I am sure that many have asked these questions to which they haven ́t found an answer, and this has stopped them in their search for wealth, success, happiness and everything else they wish for....

• Language: English
• Publisher: E. Lara, Sr
• Release date: Oct 25, 2013
• ISBN: 9781311596659

Book preview

Life is hard, so what? You must be harder

E. Lara

Smashwords Edition

Copyright © 2013 E. Lara

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

Any reproduction in whole or in part, and any type of transmission, electronic, mechanical, magnetic, photocopying or any other means, without the express written permission from the author.

TABLE OF CONTENTS

PART I

PART II

Introduction. Why I don’t get what I want?

Chapter I. The beauty of life

The beauty of life?

Life wants you to be happy

Why to live?

Chapter II. Act

The important thing is to START

The second most important thing is NOT TO GIVE UP!

And third and most important; KEEP ON DOING!

The most important thing! THINK

Chapter III. First cause. Excuses

Chapter IV. Second cause. Money

Reason 1. Wrong thinking

Reason 2. Debts

Reason 3. Unemployment and debt because of unemployment

Reason 4. Hard work

Chapter V. Third cause. Fear

Chapter VI. Fourth cause. Lack of planning

Chapter VII. Fifth cause. Lack of persistence

Chapter VIII. Sixth cause. Not believing in oneself

Chapter IX. Seventh cause. They live worrying

Chapter X. Eight cause. Absence of leadership

Chapter XI. Ninth cause. Be an I-I

Chapter XII. First cause. Action and perseverance

Chapter XIII. Second cause. Defined goals and planning

Chapter XIV. Third cause. Thought, act, continue acting… and been concentrated in those who produce results

Chapter XV. Fourth cause. Coherence between what you think and what you do

Chapter XVI. Fifth cause. Positive attitude

Chapter XVII. Sixth cause. They do things they don’t want but must be done

Chapter XVIII. Seventh cause. Use the time adequately

Chapter XIX. Eight cause. Do things well

Chapter XX. Ninth cause. Everything they do, they do it under the principle of win-win

Chapter XXI. Tenth cause. The adequate use of money

PART III. THE HOW

PART I

Legend says that several years ago, in a faraway town, there were three friends who were named HOW, I WANT and I CAN. They were great friends and went everywhere together; at a young age it was evident that they had very different personalities. However, they got along well and shared many interests that allowed them to have a good time together. The three of them liked sports, going to the movies, watching TV, talking, playing video games, using their computer and any other activities a child would do, but there were some other stuff they couldn’t do together. For instance, when they had homework, they could rarely work together in the same group. This was because HOW would be saying all the time, How can this be done? It is impossible. How is it possible that the teacher has given us this homework? How are we going to do it if we have to go to the movies tonight? How are we going to read so many books to do simple homework? And he would spend his whole afternoon this way. I WANT would say, I really want to help you do the homework, but at this moment my favorite show is on, or I want to get good grades, I really want to, but this homework is very difficult. I want to be able to pass the courses this year and get to the next ones but there is too much studying to be done. I want to help you but my computer doesn`t work, you know I want to and I would gladly do it but without my computer, there is nothing I can do. I want to read all those books; they look really interesting. Yes, I do want to but maybe tomorrow. Only I CAN was left. He also questioned why he had been assigned all that work, he also had fun things to do and even though sometimes he didn`t know how to do some things or wanted to do some other things, he knew he could do his homework and did it. Because of these reasons, as the years went by, the three good friends started taking different directions.

During the first years of their childhood, there was no problem because their main concern was just having fun, but as they became older their priorities started to change. When they finished high school, the three friends wanted to go to college together and even though it was a dream for the three of them, they just couldn`t do it. The problem was that HOW wasn`t able to make up his mind whether he wanted to enroll in college or not because he didn`t know how was he going to pay. After his parents gave him a solution for that, he asked himself how he would pass the subjects, how would he get to campus, how could he be sure that he had made the right decision; he would ask himself if it was worth studying so much since there are not many jobs these days. So he kept on thinking and thinking in this manner and decided not to enroll in the university. He thought that there were too many unanswered questions and that he would take the risk later. Now he was young and he could make money. And then there were I WANT and I CAN. No matter how bad I WANT longed to go to college, he never did anything to get in. He said that he wanted to do it but that he had to make time because he was busy doing other things. Then he said that he really wanted to but needed to check other colleges; he really wanted to but didn`t really feel like studying anymore; he said that he wanted to but that it was too difficult; in the end, he dropped the idea. There was only I CAN, who also faced many doubts and had other things to do; he also needed to make money and wasn`t sure if he would find a job once he finished college; he knew that there were many obstacles, but he made up his mind and enrolled in college because he knew he could.

Several months went by and HOW, WANT AND CAN kept in touch; they talked all the time to each other through social networks and continued being good friends, but little by little they started becoming distant and as the years went by, they stopped talking to each other at all. Nevertheless, one day, about ten years after they had talked to each other for the last time, they met at the city park and went to a nearby restaurant. They were happy because they had met again, so they wanted to know what they had been up to in those last ten years. HOW started talking, nothing had come up the way he had planned. This made him feel that he had the right to talk about how unfair life was and about the city they lived in. He said that when he finished school he started looking for a job, but he couldn`t find anything suitable for an intelligent young man such as himself; every day he looked for a job but didn´t find anything. He´d ask himself, How is it that there are no jobs? How was it possible that the government hadn`t done anything to create new jobs, how was it that in school they hadn`t told them how hard the real world was, how was it that his parents didn`t have more money to support him to start a business. After some time, just by chance, a friend of his had work for him at his father´s store as a stock clerk. HOW explained that it wasn`t his ideal job but that he would take it until he found a better one. Months went by, however, and he wasn`t able to get a job anywhere else so he started complaining to the father of the guy about his low pay. How was it possible that he`d have such a low wage in exchange of such an enormous effort that he made? How was it possible that he had to work such long hours; how could his friend`s father exploit him like that? He felt that he needed more support, so he gathered with other clerks and decided to ask for more money from their employers, more breaks and fewer hours. CAN interrupted HOW`s story and asked, Why didn`t you ask for a promotion or simply looked for a better opportunity? So HOW answered, Well, they asked for too many requirements and I would have to work more time, in other jobs they asked me to have college degrees or master´s degree, How do they think of making things so difficult for a candidate? I just wanted to work, how dare they asking me for degrees? They don´t realize that I have no time to study. There are not enough programs I can enroll in, in this city; it is the government`s and the company’s fault." HOW kept on telling how now and again they had been keeping him from getting the chance that he deserved to be successful, concluding that he has definitely been born with bad luck or something because he hadn`t been able to work making the money he wanted to make, or doing what he wanted to do to get to the right level of life. He told his friends that he lived with his parents and on welfare because he hadn`t been able to find a job in a good company. Then he told his friends how he had hooked up with his girlfriend and that at the beginning and during the first two years, everything had been going well. Both of them worked so they had enough money to decide to buy their own beautiful house in the suburbs. Everything seemed to be going well until the price of the house started going down and the mortgage increased, which lead to problems amongst them. They started lacking money and fighting every day. HOW explained to both of his good friends that his girlfriend immediately had looked for a second job to make ends meet but this made them even more distant due to the different schedules they had; they couldn´t see each other, which bothered him very much because she was disregarding their home. As weeks went by, HOW decided to demand a raise from his boss. Since he didn´t get it, he decided that the best option was to leave his job because they didn´t value him in that company; therefore his girlfriend had to support the family all by herself while HOW spent his time speaking negatively about life, his ex-bosses, the government, his family, friends and everybody. He disregarded his relationship, too, so his girlfriend dumped him. HOW told his friends that he didn´t understand why his girlfriend had been so unfair to him; he didn´t understand why she dumped him if he only wanted to provide them a suitable level of life and because of that he had to require respect anywhere he worked and demand the salary that he thought was fair. HOW told them that he was sad and disappointed about life and that everything was too difficult and that he would have wanted to be born in another city or county so everything would be different.

CAN and WANT listened to him patiently and with some understanding. As soon as HOW stopped talking, WANT took the floor and started telling about what he had been doing all this time; he felt proud of some accomplishments but he felt that his life was only halfway there. He explained to his friends that as soon as he had finished school, he got an excellent job in one of the biggest companies in the city and that he had great benefits such as medical and dental insurance, as well as a retirement plan, a two-week vacation every year and a little office. Even though WANT knew that he had a good salary, he had higher expectations. Since he wanted to get better pay, he started taking some courses in college of subjects related to his job; he also read a lot of books and studied hard the topics he had to deal with on daily basis. He was an efficient worker who did his job well and on time. Even though he said to himself I am going to talk to my boss about the raise I want, he never did. Days, weeks, and months went by; he never found the right time. He always found excuses to avoid addressing the topic. Either his boss was too busy or the economy was slow, or he felt he could be fired if he asked for a raise. Although he wanted and needed the money, he never actually did anything to go to his boss and put it on the table. This same situation occurred when there was a position for promotion available in the company. Even though he filled the bill, he never had the courage to take the required test for it because he was afraid to fail and have his boss think that he was incompetent and because of that, he decided to stay where he was. He wanted things but didn´t act upon his desires. Time went by and while he was ok economically he didn´t accomplish any of his many goals. One day he had a great idea for a business; he learned what he had to learn, he spoke with the people he needed to speak with. Nonetheless, his idea never came to happen. When his friends and family asked why he didn´t start his business, he said that he was still working on some details and that he also needed the money. The clock kept ticking and his projects stopped being ideas and vanished into dreams which turned into unreachable things because he didn´t put any action to make them come true. Anyway, WANT started losing his energy as he started making some new friends that instead of helping him were sinking him. These new friends were called FEAR, CONCERN and CONFORMISM, who told him with a heavy voice "What do you work so hard for? In that company you`re going to get absolutely nothing, they won`t give you any acknowledgements; look at me, I have been here for fifteen years and I am at the same place where I began, there are no opportunities here, you are lucky to still have a job. What do you get from handing in your reports on time? What do you get from being punctual? What do you get from studying so much? I`ll tell you; NOTHING. The best thing for you is to be like the rest of us. You won´t get anywhere. Don´t do more than what they ask for. You won´t go further than any of us, you’re just wasting your time." When CONFORMISM stopped talking, CONCERN started talking. He was always butting in; he would say "The best thing to do is not to do anything. Do you remember what happened the last time you tried to do something and it didn´t work? You`d better think about this twice, don`t do anything yet, think about it all the time." Last but not least, FEAR took the floor and said What would happen if everything goes wrong? Who is going to support your family? Why do you want to ask for that promotion? What happens if it doesn`t work? What will you do if they fire you? Stay where you are, don´t do anything new! Therefore, I WANT stopped pursuing his dreams, he stuck to his everyday routine, and he thought that in the end he was living ok without making any additional effort. He told himself, Why take the risk, why am I going to lose everything just to pursue ideas? He knew that he wanted to be happier, healthier, and have more love, more wealth and more of everything in life but things simply didn´t work for him and opportunities hadn´t come to him.

CAN listened to what his two friends said…. A few minutes after some uncomfortable silence, he started to tell his story. He began telling them about the decision he had made of going to college, how at the beginning it was kind of difficult for him because everything was new. The subjects, friends, the environment; nevertheless little by little he started getting used to the changes. Even though he had to face tough moments, mainly when crisis struck and his parents weren´t able to pay for his studies and had to find a job to pay for tuition, he didn´t give up. He worked in different places where opportunities opened. He knew that his goal was to complete his studies without debt. He knew that all of those jobs were temporary because the goal in his head was clear and specific; it didn´t matter if his classmates mocked him or if other people rejected him, he knew where he was going and he was going to overcome that difficult phase. A few weeks before he finished at the university, the idea of starting a business crossed his mind. He knew that he didn´t have the money nor anyone`s support but he also knew that if he focused on his goal, he could achieve it one way or another. Because of that, he started getting ready for it. He studied finances, human resources and logistics. He also established a friendship with a lawyer who would explain to him what had to be done for everything to be in order. Days went by and it seemed that he didn´t put his knowledge into practice. Out of the blue, he met two cousins of FEAR and CONCERN, they were called COWARDNESS and PROCRASTINATION, and both of them were counseling him in his new venture. The first one said that it was better for him to not waste his time in starting this new idea because it was too risky, while PROCASTINATION, a beautiful lady, seduced him with words that said, "Do it another day… why now, you can watch TV now?" Little by little CAN started following their lead, and by the end