The Big Huge Fat Vampire Bat

By Norm Cowie

When teen vampire Erin's bat mysteriously gains weight, her friends Trug and Nevin investigate. Clues lead them to a graveyard and pizzeria. Then a zombie shows up and the guano hits the fan.

A comedy short story by award-winning humorist Norm Cowie

• Language: English
• Publisher: Norm Cowie
• Release date: Sep 17, 2013
• ISBN: 9781301535507

Norm Cowie

Fantasy humor author of Bonk & Hedz, a caveman story, the YA humor vampire/werewolf novels Fang Face and WereWoof and Preditors and Editors readers' choice award-winning urban-fantasy humor Adventures of Guy series.

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What they say about Norm's full length books

I loved this book, fangs and all. Best selling author James Rollins on Fang Face

... an amusing teen vampire tale... Five starred review - Harriet Klausner, Amazon's #1 book reviewer on Fang Face

… humorous fantasy at its best… Armchair Interviews (Amazon Top reviewer), on The Adventures of Guy

No topic is safe from Cowie’s incredible wit and entertaining turn-of-phrase. On The Adventures of Guy - Pop Syndicate (rated one of Pop Syndicate's Top Ten Books of 2007)

The Next Adventures of Guy chosen Winner of Preditors and Editors Readers Choice award for best Sci-Fi Fantasy

The Big, Huge, Fat Vampire Bat

All rights Reserved.

Copyright 2012 by Norm Cowie

Smashwords Edition

cover image by Norm Cowie

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(See additional titles by this author at end of book or at his website)

http://www.normcowie.com

...

This is a work of fiction.

That means it’s not based on real stuff.

I don’t personally know any vampires or zombies, though I know a few people who might be confused with zombies, at least until their first cup of coffee.

Anyway, I made this all up.

These people don’t exist.

Sorry. I know you like them.

The Big, Huge, Fat Vampire Bat

By Norm Cowie

"Scrabble"

Another on the list of games zombies can’t play.

Erin crossed off a day on the calendar and sighed. Another day down.

Trug looked up from his cell where he had been texting Nevin, who was sprawled on the couch ten feet away taking up more space than a hundred pound kid should. What do you mean, to the end of the school year?

I hope not. I don’t want the school year to end, Nevin interrupted.

Trug frowned. You don’t? Why not?

Girls.

Huh?

Girls. School is like a zoo of women.

Erin frowned, A zoo?

Nevin waved his arms, No, not like that. Think about it, all of the pretty girls in town have to come here. They’re required to. It’s like a showcase, a collection of babes.

Babes? Erin’s face darkened.

Yeah, babes. Like you. You’re all forced to go to school. He waggled his eyebrows. Even better, you dress up, wear tight jeans and wear makeup and stuff. He turned his eyes back to his Wii control, and added, And we guys get to go there and observe you.

Observe?

Trug’s mouth opened to say something. Then it snapped shut because of the glower beginning to spread across Erin’s face. That’s when Trug noticed the calendar’s theme. He winced. Why couldn’t you have picked out another calendar?

The impending cloud abruptly left Erin’s face and she grinned. Obviously, she hadn’t really been angry. I love dog calendars.

Trug stifled a groan.

Nevin looked up, I liked being a dog.

Nevin and Trug had temporarily been turned into were-dogs the previous fall after a werewolf had marked them by